No one knows where the duck came from or how it got there
September 10, 2018 1:05 PM   Subscribe

 
No one knows where the duck came from or how it got there

So kind of like the Druids?
posted by The Tensor at 1:06 PM on September 10 [25 favorites]


From the article:
“People are concerned because we haven’t had a lot of rain so his puddle is drying up,” said Bollen. “There’s a collective effort among the public at large to keep the duck in water. People are just going down with containers to fill up his puddle.”
* heart explodes into confetti *
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 1:07 PM on September 10 [31 favorites]


So kind of like the Druids?

Came to make this same joke! Well done.
posted by AgentRocket at 1:13 PM on September 10


The department for agriculture, forestry and fisheries is currently considering options such as relocation, bringing in a companion duck, as well as wooden decoys to keep him company. Concrete replica birds were used in the case of Nigel the lonely gannet, who lived alone on the uninhabited Mana Island off the north of New Zealand until his death in February.

Now I want to write a science fiction novel about someone stranded on a desolate world, getting slowly more and more confused as aliens beyond their comprehension slowly litter the landscape with horrifying blank-faced mannequins.
posted by dng at 1:20 PM on September 10 [97 favorites]


No one knows where the duck came from or how it got there

Now I'm just spitballing here, but hear me out.  Birds have wings and ducks have wings and migrate, so we know they can do long distances…

…Nah, can't have flown.   Must have been a yacht.
posted by los pantalones del muerte at 1:26 PM on September 10 [6 favorites]


He has been christened Trevor, after the the Speaker of the House of Representatives in New Zealand, Trevor Mallard


I'll allow it.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 1:27 PM on September 10 [41 favorites]


No one knows where the duck came from or how it got there

Occam's Razor says the duck arrived like
this. I can't imagine a more obvious solution.
posted by The_Vegetables at 1:37 PM on September 10 [1 favorite]


No doubt the duck will start asking local shopkeepers if they got any grapes.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 1:41 PM on September 10 [26 favorites]


Q: How do you get down off Niue?
A: You don't. You get down off a duck.
posted by chavenet at 1:43 PM on September 10 [5 favorites]


bringing in a companion duck

This is how you get invasive species...
posted by dilaudid at 1:49 PM on September 10 [14 favorites]


I have no idea how these people got their duck wedged into their island, or why.
posted by dywypi at 1:50 PM on September 10 [14 favorites]


It’s part of the mystery.

So you’re saying it could be a duck, duck, ruse?
posted by not_the_water at 1:55 PM on September 10 [16 favorites]


Does Gary Larson know about this?
posted by Countess Elena at 1:58 PM on September 10 [15 favorites]


As I read the article, I could hear Jemaine Clement narrating the story in my head.
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 1:59 PM on September 10 [5 favorites]


One of my favorite Instagram accounts, DucksMakeGreatPets, features an exceedingly kind Golden Retreiver who has befriended the flock of ducks in his house.

Perhaps this duck can also find a canine friend! (I mean COME ON)
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 2:02 PM on September 10 [10 favorites]


Must have taken a wrong turn at Albuquerque.
posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson at 2:03 PM on September 10 [25 favorites]


I’m going to tell myself he is the missing Geoffrey from Anstruther.
posted by gnuhavenpier at 2:05 PM on September 10 [1 favorite]


First, let's compare the weight of each person on the island to that of the duck to see if any of them are a witch.
posted by It's Never Lurgi at 2:18 PM on September 10 [10 favorites]


TFA includes a picture of Trevor sitting in his 'puddle'.

Does 'puddle' mean something different on Niue? Because that looks like a remarkable substantive body of water to be called a 'puddle'. A 'pond', perhaps.
posted by hanov3r at 2:33 PM on September 10 [1 favorite]


I'd check with anybody selling insurance on the island about which companies they're affiliated with... then I'd look around for non-native geckos.
posted by oneswellfoop at 2:47 PM on September 10 [4 favorites]


oh noes i'm going to get attached to this duck aren't i
posted by numaner at 2:48 PM on September 10 [3 favorites]


“Everyone’s familiar with Trevor,” said Kirk Yates, the New Zealand high commissioner in Niue.

god, I can't help but read that in Rhys Darby's voice.
posted by GuyZero at 2:54 PM on September 10 [6 favorites]


damn, came for ' Albuquerque'.
posted by zengargoyle at 2:56 PM on September 10


What the duck.
posted by Quackles at 4:36 PM on September 10 [1 favorite]


Does 'puddle' mean something different on Niue?

I mean, when you're surrounded by the largest ocean on the planet...
posted by tobascodagama at 4:42 PM on September 10 [5 favorites]


That is without a doubt the most thorough and well-sourced news article I have ever read about a duck.
posted by nebulawindphone at 4:44 PM on September 10 [10 favorites]


The duck seems content in its current situation, but there are concerns that it might be lonely.

I have found my people. Come, fellow crouton-petters, let us go start new lives on Niue.
posted by The otter lady at 6:00 PM on September 10 [5 favorites]


Come, fellow crouton-petters

You realize this is an actual sentient living being, right?
posted by Sys Rq at 9:46 PM on September 10


You realize this is an actual sentient living being, right?

... Are you saying that croutons don't have feelings?
posted by The otter lady at 9:57 PM on September 10 [4 favorites]


Ha! yes. I was going to post this but didn't get around to it- glad my "metafilter would like this" sense isn't off.
posted by freethefeet at 12:03 AM on September 11


Everything was going fine until someone introduced the orange to Niue.
posted by Devonian at 5:06 AM on September 11


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