Of Course The Sports Channel Would Be "The Slapshot"
February 11, 2019 5:10 PM   Subscribe

On Twitter, one inventive Canadian amused and mortified his girlfriend whenever they passed a gas station - by using the gas price as a launching point to create an ad hoc promo for a fictional radio station. (SLTwitter)
posted by NoxAeternum (52 comments total) 32 users marked this as a favorite
 
This is hilarious. I particularly enjoy his girlfriend's exasperated body language and occasional chortles.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 5:20 PM on February 11, 2019 [18 favorites]




I'm trying to wrap my head around an alternate reality where Sarnia has a Ska radio station. I think Max Webster would have turned out very differently.
posted by Ashwagandha at 5:44 PM on February 11, 2019 [12 favorites]


#ButImStillSingle
posted by glonous keming at 5:53 PM on February 11, 2019 [3 favorites]


These are clever and funny on their own (I admire how quickly he comes up with them!), and maybe the girlfriend is more amused by them than she comes across in the video, but I do get tired of "I am going to annoy my tolerant and patient girlfriend with my antics!" thing that too many men do. To be fair, though, they're mostly not this funny. But I would've liked to have seen her really enjoy that he does this.

And yeah, most couple have private jokes or things they like to tease the other one about, so I'm sure she also has something she does to him (I hope!) that's comparable, but I want to see fewer men intentionally annoying their girlfriends, even if it's all in fun.
posted by darksong at 6:05 PM on February 11, 2019 [6 favorites]


"Gosh golly, grandpa, IP addresses sure were a lot shorter in your day!"
posted by phooky at 6:09 PM on February 11, 2019 [3 favorites]


The comedy rule of driving things into the ground is:

First time is funny.
Second time is slightly less funny.
Third time is the absolute best (comedy rule of three)
Fourth time is weird. You just had the peak but now you're coming down.
Fifth time is annoying.
Sixth time is annoying.
Seventh time, though, it becomes funny again.
Eight, nine and 10 are annoying.
At eleven, the joke turns into something something else entirely, which may or may not be funny.
After that, it's hit or miss, mostly miss.
At some point, it's no longer a joke. It's That Stupid Shit You Always Do, Steve.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 6:29 PM on February 11, 2019 [18 favorites]


Love this, but his schtick wouldn't work here in the Lower Mainland. Last time I checked, 127.9 is not a valid North American FM frequency.
posted by HillbillyInBC at 6:33 PM on February 11, 2019 [7 favorites]


This is very fine in every way.
posted by LobsterMitten at 6:45 PM on February 11, 2019 [3 favorites]


"I am going to annoy my tolerant and patient girlfriend with my antics!"

Ha! I used to do something similar on road trips with my (then) girlfriend Sunny.

Of course, that was 1996, so...

We broke up in 1999. She's still one of my best friends, and sometimes, we still laugh at some of the jokes.

The times we had then were just times when we were having them. Long trips to visit family in a hand-me-down 85 Ford Tempo with an AM radio....

They've turned out to have been some of the very best times. But, you sorta had to be there, I guess.
posted by Pogo_Fuzzybutt at 6:47 PM on February 11, 2019 [1 favorite]


I got a pretty strong feeling that the annoyance was almost entirely performative and that her theatrical dying every time he launched into one of these was as much a part of the joke/ritual as his little improvisations. It's not everybody's idea of humor, but I choose to believe that her exasperation was feigned.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 7:00 PM on February 11, 2019 [24 favorites]


Also I'm pretty sure she's trying to hold back a snerk and not quite succeeding, on a few of those.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 7:01 PM on February 11, 2019 [4 favorites]


I enjoyed this immensely (it reminds me of the way we crack up over the several vulgarly-named gas station chains throughout the Midwest when we’re on road trips) but wow do I not understand how Canadian gas works. Is that by the liter?
posted by padraigin at 7:02 PM on February 11, 2019 [1 favorite]


The prices are in Celsius.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 7:02 PM on February 11, 2019 [50 favorites]


We use the metric dollar, you see.
posted by some chick at 7:18 PM on February 11, 2019 [25 favorites]


I find it endearing. He must be ready to be a father, because this is some extremely dad humor.
posted by Countess Elena at 7:59 PM on February 11, 2019 [4 favorites]


do I not understand how Canadian gas works. Is that by the liter?

Yes. Now... Can you please educate me on exactly how a gallon works? Because, I know how many liters my tank takes, but the moment I cross over to America I have absolutely no clue... That, and based on our current exchange rate, it is nearly $1million Canadian dollars to $1 USD... Oh, and explain why Chip+Pin debit cards from Canada - which work all around the world, just won't in gas pumps there either...
posted by jkaczor at 8:13 PM on February 11, 2019 [1 favorite]


Very funny. Thanks for sharing!
posted by Don.Kinsayder at 8:30 PM on February 11, 2019


Hey, if you have a partner who is fully present and open in the relationship, you're going to be privy to a lot of stupid stuff they'd normally keep inside their heads. That's the best part.
posted by davejay at 9:04 PM on February 11, 2019 [18 favorites]


Oh, and explain why Chip+Pin debit cards from Canada - which work all around the world, just won't in gas pumps there either...

I remember blowing gas station cashier's minds by tapping my card on their machines to pay for gas on a trip to the US last winter. Of course I only had to pay inside because the pumps all kept asking me for a zip code I didn't have.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 9:49 PM on February 11, 2019 [6 favorites]


This is frickin perfect and basically my idea of a dream man
posted by capnsue at 11:14 PM on February 11, 2019 [1 favorite]


Google will convert these prices for you. 95.9 is US$2.73/gal
posted by Pruitt-Igoe at 11:30 PM on February 11, 2019 [1 favorite]


Seattle has a Top 40 station called KUBE 93.3; my workgroup has dubbed it "Seattle's station for hip hop and Kubernetes."
posted by batter_my_heart at 1:35 AM on February 12, 2019 [4 favorites]


the several vulgarly-named gas station chains throughout the Midwest

The Pump 'n' Munch gives me life.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 3:37 AM on February 12, 2019 [5 favorites]


Of course I only had to pay inside because the pumps all kept asking me for a zip code I didn't have.

Next time, drop the letters and enter the numbers from your postal code followed by two zeros. Example: V6B 4G1 becomes 64100. This one weird trick has worked on most every US point-of-sale terminal I've encountered that requires a ZIP code.
posted by HillbillyInBC at 5:26 AM on February 12, 2019 [18 favorites]


I remember blowing gas station cashier's minds by tapping my card on their machines to pay for gas on a trip to the US last winter.

This is the crazy part for me. Most newer US point of sale terminals have pay to tap NFC enabled, but US banks don't let their customers use it. So us furriners get a quick way to pay but usonians still have to put in their PINs. Generally, I find, if you see an ApplePay sticker, you can tap your card.
posted by bonehead at 5:59 AM on February 12, 2019


Why, yes, I do want the smoothest jazz in Burlington!

Count me among those who didn't think the girlfriend was annoyed or exasperated. You can even hear her laughing at some of them.

This is just the sort of thing my family would do.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 6:55 AM on February 12, 2019 [3 favorites]


I had a running gag about Fantastic Sam, the sad-sack owner of an amalgam of Sam's Italian Foods and Fantastic Sam's, Fantastick Sam's House of Hoagies and Hair Cuttery. Sam was born when we were in Maine getting married and saw a sign at Sam's Italian advertising "Free ATVs with Every Kid's Meal" and we were trying to figure out just how desperate Sam was for business (and friendship) that he was losing thousands of dollars (and gaining millions in liability) with every kid's meal.

It was a great distraction from the stress of a wedding, though Sam's nasally voice and catch phrase ("Hey, kids...") was not a success in the honeymoon suite.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 7:09 AM on February 12, 2019 [3 favorites]


I want to see fewer men intentionally annoying their girlfriends

We're just making sure you will always love us no matter what.
posted by M-x shell at 7:14 AM on February 12, 2019 [1 favorite]


This is Bloor and Parkside right?
posted by GuyZero at 7:47 AM on February 12, 2019


Also the small-town Ontario shoutouts are killing it. Fuckin Blenheim
posted by GuyZero at 7:49 AM on February 12, 2019 [6 favorites]


We're just making sure you will always love us no matter what.


oh god that hit a little closer to home than i would've liked
posted by dismas at 8:26 AM on February 12, 2019 [3 favorites]


Blenheim, for those unfamiliar, is down the road from Chatham, Ontario which is home to the Satellite Restaurant which is where Hawaiian Pizza was created. Knowing is half the battle.
posted by Ashwagandha at 8:38 AM on February 12, 2019 [5 favorites]


Love this, but his schtick wouldn't work here in the Lower Mainland. Last time I checked, 127.9 is not a valid North American FM frequency.
I wish I lived in a part of Canada where gas prices were low enough to fit on the FM dial :(
posted by milnews.ca at 8:43 AM on February 12, 2019


Can you please educate me on exactly how a gallon works?

Divide liters by 4 to get a rough gallon estimate. It's the same as the number of downs you get in football.
posted by cmfletcher at 10:10 AM on February 12, 2019 [1 favorite]


"This is the crazy part for me. Most newer US point of sale terminals have pay to tap NFC enabled, but US banks don't let their customers use it. So us furriners get a quick way to pay but usonians still have to put in their PINs. Generally, I find, if you see an ApplePay sticker, you can tap your card."

I feel like at least part of this isn't a decree by banks, but just us as people. I'm still annoyed about this whole chip thing, mysteriously placed slots just seems worse than the good ol' swipe. Swipe! That's a good gesture and like most of the gestural components are more or less exclusive to the act.

Tapping? Tapping we do all the time everywhere, it has no gravitas, it has no heft.
posted by GoblinHoney at 10:25 AM on February 12, 2019


Who is tapping? Use the Speedpass app thingy and you can pay for gas from inside your car.

Generally, I find, if you see an ApplePay sticker, you can tap your card

This is because Apple Pay is really an extension of NFC payment. So, just like you found out, if a terminal has Apple Pay they almost always support the base NFC payment system underneath it.
posted by JoeZydeco at 10:55 AM on February 12, 2019


This is Bloor and Parkside right?

Yeah, that's totally Keele station they keep walking towards.
posted by chrominance at 11:05 AM on February 12, 2019


I just want to say that this is a thing I've been doing for the last few weeks, just not as cleverly. My wife has not yet informed me that she's sick of the joke.
posted by suetanvil at 11:33 AM on February 12, 2019 [1 favorite]


Sarnia would totally have a radio station called "105.9 The Cougar."

This is totally the kind of schtick I would push too far for too long, hazarding my marriage. A+ work here.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 12:30 PM on February 12, 2019 [4 favorites]


Sarnia would totally have a radio station called "105.9 The Cougar."

If you asked me if Sarnia had this exact station, I would have said yes, of course it does.
posted by GuyZero at 1:06 PM on February 12, 2019 [3 favorites]


Can you please educate me on exactly how a gallon works?

Back in 1776, when they parted ways, the US continued to use the same measurement system as old England. A pint was a pound the whole world round. In 1824, England decided that Great Britain needed to be greater and Imperialized the Gallon, making it bigger. Canada was formed in 1867, based in part, on the Imperial Gallon, a quantity of which our first PM was said to indulge in daily. So naturally, a gallon of gas in Windsor, Ontario was 20% bigger than the gallons in Detroit. This was clear to all and caused no confusion ever.

In 1976, to celebrate the US bicentenial, Canada decided to metrify gasoline (except for Carleton Place, Ontario), to make things simpler. Plans to sell gas in plastic baggies fortunately were not tabled. Gas was thus (mostly) priced in litres (rather confusingly, as the SI unit for volume is the cubic metre), splitting the difference in size between the US customary quart and the Imperial one, a compromise that has really suited no one, in retrospect.

None the less, here we are with litres priced like classic rock stations.
posted by bonehead at 2:13 PM on February 12, 2019 [7 favorites]


cmfletcher: Divide liters by 4 to get a rough gallon estimate. It's the same as the number of downs you get in football. It's the same as the number of downs you get in football.

In the region between Canada and the USA, they play with 3.785 downs.
posted by InTheYear2017 at 3:23 PM on February 12, 2019 [3 favorites]


In the region between Canada and the USA, they play with 3.785 downs.

That's Point Roberts, right?
posted by sauril at 5:02 PM on February 12, 2019


I foolishly watched this (with earphones in) next to my wife just after she had decided to go to sleep, last night.
She calmly pointed out that no one can drift off while their is cackling next to them.
When I showed it to her today, she also cackled, despite often being in the position of the spouse of Someone Who Beats Jokes to Death and Beyond.
posted by Mutant Lobsters from Riverhead at 6:26 PM on February 12, 2019


Coca-cola is more expensive per liter in the US than gasoline is per liter in Canada.

In fact, last I checked, Coke was $1.99/liter in a bottle inside the store and gasoline was $2.37/gallon at the pump. So Coke is nearly 4 times as expensive as gasoline.

Contemplate that for a moment. Wow.
posted by hippybear at 12:18 AM on February 13, 2019


I'm sorry. I just broke my own reality (and brain) a bit.

Wow.
posted by hippybear at 12:19 AM on February 13, 2019


Burlington! If I could only recall the name of the radio station we had there (way high up on the dial, featured Rockin' Robin, oh and my friend's dad)
posted by stevil at 7:15 AM on February 13, 2019 [1 favorite]


Sarnia would totally have a radio station called "105.9 The Cougar."

And it would play A LOT of Kim Mitchell. And BTO on the nines.
posted by Ashwagandha at 9:29 AM on February 13, 2019 [4 favorites]


A banner day for mentions of Sarnia on MetaFilter. "It's great to be home!!!!"
posted by The Card Cheat at 11:34 AM on February 13, 2019 [3 favorites]


I know these people! Matt's twitter feed is really funny (but heavy on baseball content...our mutual love of the Blue jays is how I know them). And his partner has separately confirmed that her occasional expressions of exasperation are 100% part of the bit.

If anyone is in Toronto and likes trivia, these two host a trivia night every Monday at the Whelan's Gate pub at Bloor and Parkside (that's where they were coming from when he shot the clips).
posted by dry white toast at 3:11 PM on February 13, 2019 [2 favorites]


Sarnia - previously on Metafilter.
posted by Ashwagandha at 6:53 AM on February 14, 2019


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