Hi Simon, I'm Theo. You're my best friend.
April 24, 2019 7:24 PM   Subscribe

Simon would wait all day for the cat in the window. Then one day, Simon asked the cat his name, and a beautiful love story began. Now, Simon and Theo will have their first date on Thursday, April 25th.
posted by gladly (30 comments total) 26 users marked this as a favorite
There's a neighbor cat that used to come and talk with my younger boy cat through the patio doors last summer and fall. She didn't come all winter, but a few weeks ago she started showing up again. (She has a collar and is obviously well fed and cared for, so I'm pretty sure she's not a stray or feral.) I call her Princess Buttercup.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 7:44 PM on April 24 [9 favorites]

thank god for the internet. christ knows where we would be as a species without quality content like this.
posted by Bwentman at 7:56 PM on April 24 [22 favorites]

There's a nearby bengal kitty that loves to visit. And then kick the everloving shit out of my cats.
posted by Jessica Savitch's Coke Spoon at 7:59 PM on April 24 [7 favorites]

Oh man. Knowing cats, I'm a little worried they'll just start sparring like maniacs. But I'm really excited to see what happens.

Cats are, after all, mysterious beasts. Even 'indoor cats' raised in captivity, will have VERY different temperaments and acumen to other felines they might meet. Kinda like when you meet someone from a dating site and find out one of you has a base-line that the other finds pretty damn freaky. Fingers firmly crossed.
posted by es_de_bah at 7:59 PM on April 24 [4 favorites]

Soon a female bald eagle will come into the mix and they will all raise chicks together and you can watch it all on webcam.
posted by hippybear at 8:10 PM on April 24 [22 favorites]

Yaaas!!! I have first date jitters on their behalves

So excited, mazel tov
posted by Hermione Granger at 8:52 PM on April 24 [6 favorites]

At my old apartment complex I had these neighbors who would let their itty bitty girl kitty go outside and sit on the edge of their 2nd story apartment's balcony, which was visible from my bedroom window.

I didn't like these neighbors, because 1) they were really fucking loud and 2) because I never quite felt like they understood how dangerous it was for their kitty to be outside in an area where a hawk could easily pick her off.


I got home one day and stepped out on MY balcony and saw my neighbors smoking on theirs. Right as I was about to say something rude and indignant one of them goes, "Hey! You must be the other cat's mom!"

I stumbled a bit. Yes, I am a cat's mom, please explain how y'all know I have a cat in the first place because I don't let her outside.

"Yeah, did you know your cat loves our cat? Any time we come outside with her, your cat runs to your window to meow at us. She nuzzles the glass and everything! Happens almost every day!"

Neighbor cat in question chirps sweetly.

On cue, my cat appears in the doorway of my screen door and meows hopefully in return. I think back to all the times I have introduced her to other cats, times that were marked by much hissing and primordial yowling and me losing hope of ever having another pet. Then it dawns on me.

Those were all boy cats.

"Bunny Cat!" I exclaimed, hands in the air. "You giant lesbian! This explains everything!"

Smug cats purr so much more loudly than others.
posted by Hermione Granger at 9:10 PM on April 24 [96 favorites]

When I lived in Austin, I lived on the ground floor and there was a dog that really wanted to play with Edmund (who is a cat). Or wanted to pay him tribute. There was a small pile of sticks accumulating under the living room window which the dog had brought Edmund.

Edmund's desire to get face to face with the cat that wandered by was how I discovered the screen door on the patio didn't latch. Luckily, I found them happily nose-to-nose with Edmund still in the apartment.
posted by hoyland at 3:17 AM on April 25 [21 favorites]

This thread and all of your beautiful stories reads like an episode of Red Shoe Diaries, only for cats.

This is not a complaint. Keep them coming.
posted by Fizz at 3:27 AM on April 25 [10 favorites]

My neighbours have an angry tortie kitten who likes to visit my balcony and, occasionally, my house, and alas there is much less love from my cats towards her, though at least one of them goes and visits her house.
posted by jeather at 3:47 AM on April 25 [2 favorites]

My cat has other cats who like her and come visit all the time, but she hates all living creatures except me, so it never ends well. I worry about how Theo and Simon will react once they can smell one another.
posted by tofu_crouton at 5:30 AM on April 25 [2 favorites]

My last cat, who loved only me, would stare across the alley at the cats in the neighboring apartment. He would make sad little cries which could have been “be my friends!” or “I will drink blood from cups made from your skulls!” Hard to tell, really.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:52 AM on April 25 [27 favorites]

MetaFilter: “be my friends!” or “I will drink blood from cups made from your skulls!” Hard to tell, really.
posted by Fizz at 6:07 AM on April 25 [15 favorites]

Yeah cats are weird like that. My experience is most of the male cats hate other cats, females tend to be less AGGRESSIVE with their hate (like, they won't run out of the yard to flying jump kick another cat that's barely visible on the horizon, unlike SOME male cats I've known), but they still get angry at interlopers.

One cat I had was cute little girl maybe 7.5 lbs who was afraid of everything and super shy. But if another cat, no matter the size, popped into HER backyard - well I had to intervene and rescue two different big (15-20 pounders) cats that were cornered and tangled up in the plants from this little furry demon that screeched like a fucking bald eagle or something. Just the most energetic hateful outburst of pure 100% organic cat rage.

But then I had another cat that liked to chill next to the skunk that would visit sometimes, or chirp cheerfully and flounce to go meet the raccoon that was investigating the BBQ, so, yanno, cats are a land of contrasts.
posted by some loser at 6:22 AM on April 25 [9 favorites]

Now that the weather is nice, we have a buff kitty who comes to regard my three cats as they stare out from the screened in front porch. My two boys regard buff kitty right back with no real problems. My girl cat screams epithets that are not suitable for children to hear, and wishes me to please let her out so she can maul the intruder.
posted by PussKillian at 6:47 AM on April 25 [8 favorites]

I showed the Twitter thread to my cat-smitten 6 year old son, and he said, “Awwww! Is Simon cuter than Theo? I think he is.” I think the bow tie collar gives Simon the cuteness advantage.

We are eagerly awaiting news of their meetup today!
posted by Maarika at 6:59 AM on April 25 [2 favorites]

> He would make sad little cries which could have been “be my friends!” or “I will drink blood from cups made from your skulls!” Hard to tell, really.

the thing that confuses it is that for some cats, "I will drink blood from cups made from your skull!" is just how they say "I love you."
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 7:22 AM on April 25 [8 favorites]

Yeah, I think hissing and swatting and yeowling is the likely outcome here, not love. My boycat, Chester, wasn't neutered when I got him at a year old, so he'd already gone through kitty puberty, which activated the 'use urine to mark territory' switch. My house had a large sunroom in the front, with window boxes which provided a perfect perch for a cat to sit looking in, and my neighbors had three outdoor cats. The result was a perfect storm of cat spray, and the front room was almost uninhabitable until I pulled the plants out of the window boxes and replaced them with balled up barbed wire. I eventually just sold the house.

I'm not sure they should video this first meeting.
posted by jrochest at 8:26 AM on April 25 [2 favorites]

We had two cats; one died. It never occurred to us to get a "friend" for the survivor, because he was an old angry cat who hated everybody. Imagine our surprise when he made friends with a young stray tomcat. We ended up with two cats again.
posted by acrasis at 9:17 AM on April 25 [10 favorites]

OH squee! We have a new neighbor who has black/white cats. Our 2 boys are black/white as well. There's seem so nice. I'm wave through the window to them. My roomie talked to the neighbor and learned their names.

Before that, even, I kept having dreams of kitty tea party! LOL
I worry our boys are too skittish and nothing would work, but it have this stupid idea. LOL.
posted by symbioid at 11:25 AM on April 25 [1 favorite]

for about 10 months years ago, i lived on the 28th floor of a building above a busy main road. imagine my surprise when i saw a cat looking in at me through the window. apparently our neighbor liked to let her cat out on the balcony. i'm okay with supervised outdoor time, but not at 28 floors up!
posted by misanthropicsarah at 11:33 AM on April 25 [2 favorites]

There are a lot of strays/roaming cats in our neighborhood, which my kitties all seem to hate equally, but my personal favorite is one that my girlfriend and I call Miss Vanjie (we don't know her real name so we picked one). She's clearly someone's pet but she'll pause for petting before running off on adventures.

The reason I tell this story is because one time my girlfriend saw Miss Vanjie race through our yard at top speed wearing a cone on her head. Couldn't be stopped! We still laugh about it. It's spring so it's about time we start seeing her again.
posted by possibilityleft at 12:16 PM on April 25 [2 favorites]

Simon and Theo are meeting RIGHT NOW 🐾
posted by Hermione Granger at 4:20 PM on April 25 [2 favorites]

Here’s a thread with videos! It’s not love but neither was there bloodshed.
posted by gladly at 5:41 PM on April 25 [4 favorites]

Honestly that was a super good first interaction IMO

Simon is an Eager Boy
posted by Hermione Granger at 7:05 PM on April 25 [3 favorites]

sniff sniff sniff
posted by mantecol at 7:33 PM on April 25 [2 favorites]

I agree that was a good first interaction!

They were both way more comfortable in their own home. That makes sense, but my cat is the opposite. She becomes extremely uncomfortable about having another cat in her zone. She is more comfortable when she's the one impinging upon another cat's home.
posted by tofu_crouton at 12:05 PM on April 26 [1 favorite]

I love that Simon wore a tie to the playdate. And Theo's tail is a work of art.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 2:29 PM on April 26 [1 favorite]

I grew up with two huge formerly feral toms that literally slept in my crib when i was in diapers. They were bruisers. 15 pounds at least, tabby brothers from the same feral litter, identical markings except one was gold on black and one was black on gold. They did everything together, and were absolutely inseparable hunting companions. When the first died at 14, the other, who had seemed completely healthy, literally died a week later.
posted by spitbull at 3:26 PM on April 27 [3 favorites]

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