Birds who put all their stat points into Has No Chill and Has Yes Volume
July 10, 2019 9:03 AM   Subscribe

The adventures at Lazy E Farm (belated multiple link Tumblr): Today Goofus the Peacock killed a mouse | Their first great flirtation | It’s not that the peacocks are smarter, but for some reason they care about things that don’t matter. | And they're jumpy about things they don't understand posted by spamandkimchi (21 comments total) 41 users marked this as a favorite
 
Thanks, I love it.
posted by Reyturner at 9:12 AM on July 10, 2019 [2 favorites]


MetaFilter: I’m pretty sure they know they can’t eat a shovel, they just want to know what’s up with it.
posted by Fizz at 9:27 AM on July 10, 2019 [13 favorites]


This is exactly exactly what I wanted to read today, thank you

Does goofus enjoy head scritches from his designated human?

It’s amazing how expressive the Not For Petting What High Energy Cosmic Rays Passing Through Your Brain Matter From A Passing Rogue Star Even Caused That Idea To Occur face can be in a species that cannot actually move any part of their face.

posted by Caxton1476 at 9:27 AM on July 10, 2019 [2 favorites]


We probably should not have named the Death Of The Universe And The End Of All Things “Goofus,” actually.

😆
posted by Caduceus at 9:30 AM on July 10, 2019 [7 favorites]


Today the ducks, who have all the survival instincts of a book of matches if that book of matches is also really drunk, decided to Fly Off And Go Stand In The Road To See If Any Giant Wheeled Lady Ducks Came By.

I love these guys.
posted by Mogur at 9:47 AM on July 10, 2019 [11 favorites]


The goats fear only lawn mowers. Possibly they imagine that if humanity has invented Robots That Eat Grass, it’s only a matter of time under we invent Robots That Destroy Fences, Robots That Pull Buttons Off Your Shirts, and Robots That Hold The United Nations Hostage And Demand Delicious Fried Seaweed Snack, and then we won’t need goats for anything.

I was once told, by a Person Who Raise Goats, that goats are Sensitive Souls. He wasn’t trying to sell me a goat or anything, either.
posted by GenjiandProust at 9:48 AM on July 10, 2019 [12 favorites]


I love this this morning.🐐
posted by Oyéah at 9:53 AM on July 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


We probably should not have named the Death Of The Universe And The End Of All Things “Goofus,” actually.

Well, you certainly wouldn’t name him “Gallant.”
posted by TedW at 10:01 AM on July 10, 2019 [17 favorites]


I was once told, by a Person Who Raise Goats, that goats are Sensitive Souls.

I was raised by someone who has kept both goats and sheep.

In my experience, a one year old toddler has more sense than chickens, domestic ducks, and sheep. Sheep are dumb as rocks and don’t know what they’re doing ever, so if you, the human trying to get them to do, I don’t know, literally anything, also don’t know what you’re doing it’s a recipe for frustration.

The goats know exactly what they’re doing to you when they don’t cooperate, and they think it’s hilarious.
posted by Caduceus at 10:11 AM on July 10, 2019 [18 favorites]


My grandmother had a peacock on her property. His name was Prince. For reasons that do not matter, the governor of Delaware visited her one day, driven to her house by a State Trooper. We were inside socializing when the peacock, high in a tree, let out the horrendous scream for which they are known, and we all ran out to find the State Trooper, gun drawn, looking for the source of the scream.

I have a photo from my wedding of the (clothed) backsides of several wedding guests regarding the backside of Prince as he paraded around in my grandmother's chicken-yard.
posted by Peach at 10:17 AM on July 10, 2019 [10 favorites]


We probably should not have named the Death Of The Universe And The End Of All Things “Goofus,” actually.

Nice thinking, Ray.
posted by Reasonably Everything Happens at 10:29 AM on July 10, 2019 [9 favorites]


There is a very sad post on this blog, fair warning to those hoping merely for charming wholesome tumblr peacock memes.
posted by Lawn Beaver at 10:40 AM on July 10, 2019 [7 favorites]


Come for the peacocks, stay for the barn cats getting sprayed with goat milk right from the source, like a delicious spray bottle.
posted by GenjiandProust at 12:34 PM on July 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


We were inside socializing when the peacock, high in a tree, let out the horrendous scream for which they are known, and we all ran out to find the State Trooper, gun drawn, looking for the source of the scream.

If you have never heard peacock's cry, it sounds for all the world like the scream of a woman being murdered. I can only imagine the alarm of a cop hearing it for the first time.
posted by scalefree at 2:56 PM on July 10, 2019 [6 favorites]


Incidentally, Giant Wheeled Lady Ducks is the name of my new band. We even have a touring van picked out.
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:22 PM on July 10, 2019 [4 favorites]


I used to live in a Florida town that had a population of feral (sorta) peacocks. They are loud and proud, and probably delicious, which is a thought you get after hearing them scream.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 5:16 PM on July 10, 2019 [4 favorites]


Peacocks are total dicks. Almost swan-level dicks.
posted by thivaia at 6:35 PM on July 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


I lived for two years a few blocks from a zoo that had peacocks. The would roost in the tall pines and call out across our neighborhood, scaring our cats and sounding like they were calling us to some very strange evening prayers.
I just came from visiting a dying friend, and I very much needed this. Thank you, spamandkimchi.
posted by pt68 at 6:52 PM on July 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


In the mid-late 80's I was the best man at my friend's wedding where, for reasons of their own, they decided to hold the event at the Parrot Jungle which was at the time in downtown Miami. During the ceremony I had lots - like LOTS - of chances to hear peacock calls, and at the reception I was able to perfect my imitation. I still hit them with it every once in a while, to much bemused eye-rolling.
posted by Greg_Ace at 7:23 PM on July 10, 2019 [3 favorites]


Holland Park in west London contains both a flock of peacocks and a summer opera festival. I swear the peacocks have developed an instinct for screaming during the quiet bits. I first learnt about this in Turandot in the late '90s.

TURANDOT: asks the Unknown Prince a complicated and poetic riddle, which he must answer correctly or die

2 bars dramatic pause. They hold each other's gaze. Will it be love... or death?

PEACOCK: ooooAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
posted by Pallas Athena at 5:03 AM on July 11, 2019 [13 favorites]




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