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August 24, 2019 9:50 AM   Subscribe

This jumbo, 26-pound cat became a star after an animal shelter said he needed a home

I Had To Go See The 28-Pound Chonky Cat For Myself

Philly’s own chonky cat may soon have a forever home. Good job, internet.

See the adoption page for BeeJay (aka Mr. B) here.

From the second link:
Morris is going to wait through the weekend until adopting this cat out, due to the volume of submissions. Let’s hope whoever gets him is active on Instagram.
posted by phatkitten (25 comments total) 24 users marked this as a favorite
Gotta cut out the cheesesteaks.
posted by carter at 9:53 AM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

posted by phatkitten

*checks account creation date*

13 years you've waited to drop this bit of eponysterical chonk, OP. My hat is off you you.
posted by Mayor West at 10:01 AM on August 24, 2019 [92 favorites]

Im so glad this absolute unit is gonna get a furrever home. That sweet sad face ❤
posted by supermedusa at 10:09 AM on August 24, 2019 [9 favorites]

He does have the best face.
posted by octothorpe at 10:16 AM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

I want to adopt a fat white female cat and call her Honky Chonk Woman, but I can't.
posted by BrotherCaine at 10:23 AM on August 24, 2019 [14 favorites]

Mr. B is a CHONK. He’s a chonk of a chonk. He redefines the term.

He is NOT a chonk, which is an obese but otherwise normal size cat; he is an absolute unit. Please keep up, meme bandwagoners - this is not difficult.
posted by thelonius at 10:38 AM on August 24, 2019 [47 favorites]

My own personal cat is a dainty man at 7.5 pounds. The largest cat in the house, who belongs to one of my roommates, is an honestly-kinda-thin-we-should-get-Tiberius-to-eat-more 17 pounds. This, though: this cat weighs only slightly less than my dog.

This is somewhat terrifying and exceedingly delightful.
posted by sciatrix at 10:41 AM on August 24, 2019 [2 favorites]

It's a little weird looking at Mr. B and realizing that he weighs ten lbs more than my humongous cat, who weighs in at a mere 17. Mostly though I just want to snuggle him. I love huge cats and he seems to be a peach.
posted by bile and syntax at 10:46 AM on August 24, 2019 [2 favorites]

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posted by migurski at 10:46 AM on August 24, 2019 [5 favorites]

okay if we're doing related stories i absolutely have to draw everyone's attention to this, which appears on the page for the philadelphia inquirer story:

» READ MORE: The adventures of Gary the Trash Cat, West Philly's most popular opossum
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 10:58 AM on August 24, 2019 [4 favorites]

My parents have a huge cat too, about the same size as Mr. B. His paw is about the size of the palm of my hand. He’s spent most of his life hovering around 30 pounds. If I didn’t already have my limit of cats, I’d love a giant cat, especially a quiet one like Mr. B seems to be.
posted by Autumnheart at 10:58 AM on August 24, 2019 [2 favorites]

The Philly cat rescue social media game is on point. Karen from Finance blew up on Twitter a few weeks ago and got adopted quickly. In her absence, Alvin from Accounting has stepped up to manage the business needs.
posted by ActionPopulated at 11:45 AM on August 24, 2019 [13 favorites]

Morris Animal Shelter has been doing some amazing social media marketing - I see their stuff everywhere. It's a tiny shelter, or at least was back in the day.
posted by Peach at 11:49 AM on August 24, 2019

I have to say, I wish that Dr. Cat was less of a lone wolf, so to speak. I would love to adopt a second cat but not even the possibility of a secretary is enough to make her tolerate other cats. She'd rather do her own paperwork than share office space, by which I mean our entire house.
posted by Frowner at 12:11 PM on August 24, 2019 [5 favorites]

My cats are littermates but have very different attitudes towards food. Their combined wormer/flea treatments come in separate packets from the vet due to the manufacturer's weight brackets, so one packet says LARGE CAT and the other says SMALL CAT OR FERRET and I don't know which of them should feel more offended.
posted by Catseye at 1:34 PM on August 24, 2019 [8 favorites]

Yay! Morris is wonderful -- I adopted my own absolute unit* from there a few years ago, and he is my best friend now. I'm so happy to see them getting a lot of attention. And yeah, their social media game is on point.

I also want to note that Gary the Trash Cat is a legit West Philly celebrity, you should all read about him and then buy his Christmas card. (I think it's only seasonally available.) I am truly sorry I never got to meet Gary when I was living there.

*still a good ten lbs less than Mr. B oh my god I love giant cats
posted by kalimac at 2:06 PM on August 24, 2019 [2 favorites]

Karen from Finance is, I believe, named after this drag queen from Melbourne.

Are we like SURE that this boi isn't some kind of super chill bobcat
posted by en forme de poire at 2:34 PM on August 24, 2019 [11 favorites]

posted by fluffy battle kitten at 4:07 PM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

I question this source for some reason
posted by en forme de poire at 5:33 PM on August 24, 2019 [3 favorites]

Mr. B is Gritty's larval stage.
posted by delfin at 7:54 PM on August 24, 2019 [7 favorites]


The cat here is a 15-20 pounder somewhere between chonk and megachonk, and she's one of those surprisingly heavy and usually almost usually spherical sort of cats that you only rarely see unwind completely, even perfering a curled shape lazing about in the sun or sleeping.

The other day I had her scooped up in my arms sitting in the sun and I was rubbing her belly and she ended up with her front legs stretched over her head and her back legs fully stretched out and she's well over 3 feet of cat when she stretches out completely like that.
posted by loquacious at 8:18 PM on August 24, 2019 [3 favorites]

Relatedly, this fantastic thread of chonky pets requested by the shelter. Many chonks, very good content.
posted by Going To Maine at 10:19 PM on August 24, 2019 [2 favorites]

At 2 years old the chances are that Mr B is not fully grown yet either. (Big cats tend to take longer to finish growing, up to 5 years, IIRC.)

My 8kg x 1 metre (17.5lb x 1 yard) Maine cat unit is a kitten compared to ultra-unit Mr B.
posted by Pouteria at 10:50 PM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

I have a delicate Turkish Angora that weighs in at about 7 pounds. I have a formally fat cat (was about 20 pounds) that's down to 10 or so.

Gidgette, the former fat cat, is tiny compared to that wonderful ball of fur. And Ivory would just disappear behind him.

I just want to bury my face in his belly and snuggle him for about 3 hours.
posted by kathrynm at 8:23 AM on August 25, 2019 [1 favorite]


Morris Animal Refuge tweeted:
Sweet chunky Mr. B’s amazed by the huge outpawing of interest in him - over 3000 applications! He has a foster (maybe forever) home now - but so many other great adoptable cats need you. Here’s a thread of ours. Let’s make it go viral too. Adopt and RT for Mr. B and all the cats!

Also, there's a fundraising T-shirt available for 5 more days!
posted by phatkitten at 10:48 AM on August 28, 2019 [1 favorite]

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