Ambitious but Unnecessary

August 24, 2019 1:37 PM

'Matt Chats With Cats'... Reacts to 'Cats'. Matt (previously) narrates the 'Cats' trailer (previously). Posted because Matt finally appears on-camera so you can see the face that goes with That Cat-Chatting Voice. (SLYT)
posted by zaixfeep (17 comments total)

huh, i always thought he was older. and, for some reason, balder. probably because of how deep his voice is, though i'm not sure why my subconscious assumes that a deep voice means a lack of hair.

he's very kind to the trailer, though. i kind of cracked up the third or fourth time he said "... it's ambitious, i'll give it that..."
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 2:39 PM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

There are quite a lot of cats and an accepatable number of Matts but nowhere near enough scanners.
posted by Dumsnill at 3:07 PM on August 24, 2019

i think that anyone who finds themselves teaching modernist poetry is obliged to really stress how cats is ultimately t.s. eliot's fault. don't even bother teaching the waste land or whatever; you must pin cats on him and never let anyone forget it. his legacy must be as the guy who inspired a hideous 1980s musical. full stop.

if i could dig up t.s. eliot and have a conversation with him, i would show him the trailer of the movie and say "this. this is your fault, you fussy old conservative. you should feel shame. don't try to pawn this off on andrew lloyd webber. don't blame the cg designers. this is your doing. this is what your pitiful little soul looks like. this is you."

i, thomas pynchon, don't ask for much from people... but I'm asking for this:

if you can, please ruin t.s. eliot.
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 3:31 PM on August 24, 2019 [7 favorites]

if you can, please ruin t.s. eliot.
His name being an anagram for "toilets" isn't enough?
posted by dannyboybell at 4:48 PM on August 24, 2019 [7 favorites]

his name being an anagram for toilets is not enough. a million deaths are not enough for eliot. may his forlorn soul endlessly wander the sky above the russell hotel, never reaching the heaviside layer.
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 5:06 PM on August 24, 2019 [3 favorites]

good poet though
posted by lefty lucky cat at 7:05 PM on August 24, 2019

though i'm not sure why my subconscious assumes that a deep voice means a lack of hair.


DiHydroTestosterone (DHT) is an androgen and is associated with "male" traits such as deep voices, facial hair, etc... DHT is also (suspected?) linked to male pattern baldness... so that's probably why?
posted by some loser at 7:29 PM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

for example i believe the anti-baldness drug propecia is a DHT inhibitor of some sort (or an aromatease inhibitor that prevents aromatization of precursors (test, estrogen) to DHT. My memory is hazy on this and I'm too lazy to double check tho.
posted by some loser at 7:31 PM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

good poet though

shut your mouth he is trash cats is his soul
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 8:13 PM on August 24, 2019 [2 favorites]

the doggerel i write in my novels is better than his trash get out of here with that "t.s. eliot is a good poet" nonsense.
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 10:48 PM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

his name being an anagram for toilets is not enough. a million deaths are not enough for eliot. may his forlorn soul endlessly wander the sky above the russell hotel, never reaching the heaviside layer.

dont bring dune into this none of this is frank herberts fault
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 11:25 PM on August 24, 2019 [1 favorite]

hey have you ever been out drinking with friends and decide to every so often sneak out your phone and yell about t.s. eliot on the Internet because let me tell you it’s a fun time
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 11:38 AM on August 25, 2019 [6 favorites]

Preludes tho
posted by lefty lucky cat at 12:30 PM on August 25, 2019

In other "CATS" related internet silliness: The trailer for The Mandalorian synced with the audio for the CATS trailer

It works surprisingly well

(sorry to interrupt the t.s. eliot fight)
posted by nubs at 1:27 PM on August 25, 2019 [1 favorite]

metafilter: sorry to interrupt the t.s. eliot fight.

honestly i'd need more alcohol to continue it. and uhh i'm not going to want any more of that stuff for at least a few days
posted by Reclusive Novelist Thomas Pynchon at 1:51 PM on August 25, 2019 [1 favorite]

so, for my sins, i have been required at various points in life to read rather a lot of t.s. eliot, and not even the marginally fun eliot but the hard stuff, the prose -- Notes Towards the Definition of Culture and The Use of Poetry and The Use of Criticism and even, heaven help me, all that hoary stuff on dryden
and
imagine my chagrin -- nay, my sorrow! -- on realising that the book of silly delightful poems about cats i'd found long long ago in a remainder pile in the corner of some decrepit mall waldenbooks, a book which charmed me as a child, the book which introduced me to edward gorey, the book which led me to discover -- and to love, i'm not ashamed! -- the musical Cats, which inspired me to (i am not kidding about this) teach myself Memory by ear on the violin and play it in front of an audience at my third-grade music recital... imagine how it felt to learn that Old Possum's Book Of Practical Cats was in fact written by this same unsalvageable, unmitigated doofus

tl;dr t.s. eliot ruined Cats for me, not the other way around
posted by halation at 10:21 PM on August 25, 2019 [1 favorite]

He's beautiful. I must have him. Wash him up and bring him to my abode.
posted by OldAndTired at 11:45 PM on August 25, 2019 [1 favorite]