Welcome...To The Fumble Dimension
September 17, 2019 10:40 AM   Subscribe

Many of you may recall internet sports statistical bard Jon Bois' adventures in taking sports games and seeing how far he could twist the knobs until everything breaks, such as Breaking Madden, or murdering a virtual NBA with horrible players. Well, he's back at it with compatriot Kofie Yeboah, in a new series for SBNation. (SLYT)

Episode 1 is a video recounting of the aforementioned "All Is Lost" scenario, where NBA 2K is brought to its knees by a dearth of talent - all lovingly analyzed as only Bois can.
posted by NoxAeternum (23 comments total) 28 users marked this as a favorite
 
"...it's not exactly an experiment, because experiments have a point."

I am not a basketball fan, but I will watch & listen to Jon Bois do...whatever it is...that he does, on any subject.
posted by nubs at 10:56 AM on September 17, 2019 [5 favorites]


Damn now I want to play NBA 2K-negative-35
posted by supercres at 10:57 AM on September 17, 2019 [3 favorites]


Can't watch the whole thing right now; does CLARENCE BEEFTANK make a cameo?
posted by Halloween Jack at 11:30 AM on September 17, 2019 [6 favorites]


I'm so glad he finally acknowledged that he did this once before, because I briefly thought I had lost my mind.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 11:31 AM on September 17, 2019 [6 favorites]


Couldn't they have saved time and just made every team the '82 Pacers?
posted by Thorzdad at 11:50 AM on September 17, 2019 [3 favorites]


This led me to a fun fact about the 2000 NBA draft class:
"The 2000 NBA draft class collectively produced at a rate of 17.3 wins worse than a group of 'average replacement players', effectively making 2000 the only draft class in NBA history to leave the NBA talent pool worse off than it had been prior to the given year's rookie draft."
posted by theory at 11:54 AM on September 17, 2019 [9 favorites]


Can't help but notice there was nobody named Bob.
posted by nubs at 11:57 AM on September 17, 2019 [10 favorites]


I literally finished 17776 this morning! Bois makes sportsball commentary enjoyable.
posted by a halcyon day at 11:57 AM on September 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


The game play reminded me of playing jv basketball for a tiny school back in the '90s, where the people who could actually play immediately get bumped up to varsity, and tall people weren't very common so they also generally got bumped up to varsity even if they are terrible.

So jv was just like the fumble dimension - all short people with very little basketball skillz.
posted by The_Vegetables at 12:18 PM on September 17, 2019 [5 favorites]


Yeah only Michael Redd and Jamal Crawford were much of anything in that 2000 draft. Amazing amount of fail on that list.
posted by Windopaene at 12:29 PM on September 17, 2019


I didn't see any use of Google Maps.
posted by MtDewd at 1:18 PM on September 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


Breaking Madden was brilliant.
posted by zzazazz at 1:27 PM on September 17, 2019


What's the joke about 60's baseball?
posted by Carillon at 1:31 PM on September 17, 2019


Honestly, I'm kind of disappointed that it's effectively a rerun.

On the other hand, Bois' growing army of collaborators bodes well for more frequent new content in future.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 2:26 PM on September 17, 2019


"Bust the Process" would have been a better name more in line with the Breaking Madden lineage.


Particularly funny since... (spoiler)
the 76ers become champions by virtue of the alphabetical position of their team name.

posted by tonycpsu at 2:59 PM on September 17, 2019 [3 favorites]


This was absolutely glorious, thanks for posting it! Brilliant chemistry between Bois and Yeboah, who are both awesome.
posted by Dysk at 7:50 PM on September 17, 2019


This was wildly hilarious. I just wish at the end they'd let the simulator keep playing out their disaster scenario, just to see what other crazy kinds of things would happen.
posted by Conrad Cornelius o'Donald o'Dell at 8:56 PM on September 17, 2019


I remember when my brothers and I figured out that if you made a whole lineup of players on Triple Play 2000 who had perfect speed (and no other skills), you could bunt your way on base 80% of the time and run up scores of 30 or more runs.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 9:38 PM on September 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


I don't know if he has any ambitions in that direction but if Jon Bois ever gets an opportunity to play Commander Riker in a ST:TNG reboot, I am absolutely here for it.
posted by Two unicycles and some duct tape at 11:23 PM on September 17, 2019 [3 favorites]


I wish he had thrown in a few players that were carbon copies except max "intangibles" to see if that helped.
posted by ctmf at 1:23 AM on September 18, 2019 [2 favorites]


I was curious about Intangibes too, as well as "Miscellaneous Durability."
posted by JHarris at 2:51 AM on September 18, 2019


"Miscellaneous Durability" sounds like one of Brian Eno's Oblique Strategies cards.
posted by Quindar Beep at 5:15 AM on September 18, 2019 [8 favorites]


Kofie Yeboah

I was previously unaware of this gentleman (I'm not a sports person), and now I would like to see him do more things.
posted by aramaic at 11:16 AM on September 18, 2019 [1 favorite]


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