extremely normal golf game
October 1, 2019 1:31 PM   Subscribe

What the Golf [YouTube][Launch Trailer] “What The Golf? is self-admittedly a game for people who hate golf. It takes a very simple concept: whack a ball, into a hole, with a club – and goes absolutely wild with it. [...] What The Golf? is excessive nonsense. At every turn, it questions what a ball, hole or course could even look like. Golf arenas become cities, wars, racetracks and guitar fretboards. What The Golf? asks the important questions only games can answer. Can golf be football? Can golf be cars? Can golf be love? Can golf be Super Hot?” [via: Rock Paper Shotgun]

• 'What the Golf' Is WarioWare With Frickin' Golf Clubs [Vice Gaming]
“ What the Golf is incredibly deceptive. It presents as a golf game with "wacky physics," making it a challenge to corral the ball in the right direction. But in short order, What the Golf reveals it’s much stranger—and much funnier. Here's a non-spoilery example that only hints at the heights of weirdness What the Golf reaches for. A familiar setup for any “golf” game: a golfer, a golf ball, and a golf club. Place your finger on the screen to aim, pull back to fill up a power meter, and let go. A few strokes later, drop the ball in the hole. The next level? Place your finger on the screen, pull back to fill up a power meter, and let go—only to watch the golf club fly forward. The next level? The actual golfer is the one bouncing around. What the Golf escalates from here, in ways you’d never expect, and in ways I don’t even want to hint at because you should honestly discover it yourself. Ultimately much of What the Golf is centered around trying and failing to corral the game’s exaggerated physics.”
• ‘What The Golf?’ Might Be The Funniest Game Of The Year [Forbes]
“Capturing the essence of What the Golf? isn’t easy, but there are a definite comparison to an improbable combination of the Katamari series and Portal: a colorful, hilarious veneer with happy-go-lucky characters and a charming art style, which overlays a deep-space “laboratory” setting that feels like it’s masking a deeper, darker reality. Marking your progress is a friendly-looking computer–a less complex, flatscreen GLaDOS–that requires “tests” to be completed for you to move forward, before periodically challenging you to a minigame “boss” battle of sorts. Once you’re done with these, the screen explodes to reveal the next set of levels, with portals connecting you between What the Golf?’s ten sets of stages. The game’s world makes little sense, but you won’t care. By establishing itself early as an anarchic take on a heavily populated genre, What the Golf? focuses on entertainment which, despite its anti-golf MO, is universally accessible and enjoyable.”
posted by Fizz (28 comments total) 25 users marked this as a favorite
an anagram of "st andrews" is "swats nerd"
and "augusta national" is "total iguana anus"

brought to you by lsd and golf . like this game
posted by lalochezia at 1:39 PM on October 1, 2019 [8 favorites]

Finally a golf game for the rest of us... well... maybe just for me.
posted by Ashwagandha at 1:51 PM on October 1, 2019 [1 favorite]

brought to you by lsd and golf

Golf but Golf on Drugs is a theme I'd enjoy seeing applied to other sports games.
posted by Fizz at 1:57 PM on October 1, 2019 [1 favorite]

I've played 30 or so levels of What the Golf so far, and what blows me away is how many different games the developers built within the "crazy golf" framework.

I mean, obviously they didn't have to worry excessively about balancing or ironing out the bugs in any given mini-game — no one's going to complain if a single golf level that can be completed in under a minute is a little wonky — but still. The sheer number of distinct gameplay experiences is amazing, and when I try to imagine planning them all out and committing to them as a feature list in a traditional software dev environment, it makes me a little dizzy.

It's super clear that they had a ton of fun building the game, and so far it's been great fun to play. All alone, it'd be a good advertisement for the value of Apple Arcade.
posted by bluemilker at 2:10 PM on October 1, 2019 [4 favorites]

katamari da mashie
posted by Atom Eyes at 2:10 PM on October 1, 2019 [5 favorites]

I played a bunch of this last night. I don't know how deep it gets, but after a few hours I only came across one level that frustrated me. I definitely laughed out a loud a few times when my shot sent something completely unexpected flying across the screen.
posted by schoolgirl report at 2:11 PM on October 1, 2019

I really want to play this but I'm going to hold out until it's on Switch since it looks like the type of game that will benefit from portability/on-the-go. Also, I'm already like 15 hours into Dragon Quest XI and I have about 100 more to go, so it's not like I'm wanting for more games.

But yeah, this looks awesome and I love the joy and fun with which it was created.
posted by Fizz at 2:13 PM on October 1, 2019 [1 favorite]

That's it, no more delay. I'm signing up for Apple Arcade tonight.
posted by pwinn at 2:23 PM on October 1, 2019 [2 favorites]

Most of the Apple Arcade stuff I've played so far has been "Meh" but this game is amazing.
posted by phlyingpenguin at 3:07 PM on October 1, 2019

After a while with Apple Arcade – it's okay. The games seem to require a data connection when you first open them, which is annoying when you download a bunch to try on the subway and then they won't load. I have an iPhone 6S, so it's disappointing that so many of the games are battery-draining 3D graphics-hogs. I'm more interested in puzzlers and word games, and there are really only a few of those so far. Dear Reader is delightfully designed but dreadfully boring. I've mostly been playing Card of Darkness, which is clever and fun at first but becomes brutally difficult to the point where I'm losing patience with it. Not sure if I'll renew Arcade after the one-month free trial, but I'll be sure to try What the Golf in the meantime!
posted by oulipian at 3:13 PM on October 1, 2019 [1 favorite]

Did I spot a Custer's Revenge homage in that trailer? Hoo boy...
posted by The Pluto Gangsta at 3:18 PM on October 1, 2019 [4 favorites]

I played holes today that riffed on Super Mario Bros., Donkey Kong and Portal. It's the third Apple Arcade game I've downloaded—the others being Skate City and Where Cards Fall (both from the same developer, Snowman.) What The Golf? is definitely the most fun.
posted by emelenjr at 3:24 PM on October 1, 2019 [1 favorite]

This game is very very good, you guys
posted by DoctorFedora at 3:27 PM on October 1, 2019


posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 3:32 PM on October 1, 2019 [6 favorites]

This game is utterly delightful and endlessly surprising and I choose to interpret the presence of a runner wearing a “5” bib as a Zombies, Run! reference.
posted by adrianhon at 3:35 PM on October 1, 2019 [1 favorite]

Is this Frog Fractions 3?
posted by straight at 3:42 PM on October 1, 2019 [1 favorite]

Man, between this and the goose game, I'm really regretting going all in on the PS4 as a gaming platform.
posted by lumpenprole at 5:00 PM on October 1, 2019 [3 favorites]

Golf but Golf on Drugs

In college we just called this frisbee golf.
posted by soren_lorensen at 5:19 PM on October 1, 2019 [7 favorites]

Man, between this and the goose game, I'm really regretting going all in on the PS4 as a gaming platform.

When you say you "went all in on the PS4", do you mean you threw out your computer?
posted by aubilenon at 5:25 PM on October 1, 2019

I can’t speak for Lumpenprole but I could say I’ve pretty much gone all in on the PS4 as well. It’s my only console, my computer is a Mac. Getting games to work on Macs is generally more hassle than plopping my ass on the couch and waking up the PS4. Especially if you loathe keyboard and mouse as a controller, it’s even money whether a game designed for a game controller is actually gonna work with one.
posted by egypturnash at 7:27 PM on October 1, 2019

Be careful with the Apple Arcade version. I've had my save game obliterated once already, and people have reported similar issues as well. I think mine happened after the patch that supposedly fixes save resets, so it might not be completely fixed.

That said, this game is amazing and wonderful and really my only complaint is that occasionally it's too random--on some particularly sticky levels, I have to retry a whole bunch of times even after I have a pretty good idea of what to do, just because physics wooziness conspires to ruin a run (if I have to throw a hat again it'll be too soon).
posted by chrominance at 7:41 PM on October 1, 2019

Needs more bad goose.
posted by His thoughts were red thoughts at 9:59 PM on October 1, 2019

Yey! it's coming to switch, which is pretty much the only way I play video games these days.

posted by Hicksu at 11:40 PM on October 1, 2019 [3 favorites]

Those Flappy Bird levels are not my favorite, but I really like What the Golf.

(My other Apple Arcade faves are probably Skate City and Dear Reader. Word Laces isn't hard enough, while Card of Darkness is too hard. Overland I feel like I need to watch a walkthrough or something. Speed Demons is okay. I haven't played Mini Motorways or Sayonara yet, because I know I'll like them and I'm kinda saving them.)
posted by box at 8:36 AM on October 2, 2019

When you say you "went all in on the PS4", do you mean you threw out your computer?

Well, my home pc broke and I haven't gotten around to fixing it in like three months, so kinda, yeah.
posted by lumpenprole at 3:27 PM on October 2, 2019

Ah, "replaying" a hole actually gets new levels, needed to unlock ... something. I have to backtrack.
posted by Pronoiac at 11:55 PM on October 3, 2019

Well if I had known it was going to come out for Switch I wouldn't be playing it on Apple Arcade, and I guess my life would currently be less fun. I just finished all the Portal levels and have gotten crowns on everything I've played. I guess I'm almost halfway through the game? There's a lot of game here.
posted by aubilenon at 11:32 PM on October 4, 2019

You don’t really get anything amazing for “replaying” the old levels - but the variations are plenty fun and not just fillers. I’ve been going through the game attempting, mostly successfully, to 100% all the levels and I have rarely felt they were phoning it in.
posted by adrianhon at 3:19 AM on October 5, 2019

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