Relax, Greg, it’s just a joke.
February 22, 2020 5:06 PM   Subscribe

Jokes I’ve told that my male colleagues didn’t like slMcSweeney’s

From the link:

What’s long, painstakingly proofread, and full of exclamation points? A woman’s email that will still be received as “kind of bitchy.”
posted by Ghidorah (28 comments total) 101 users marked this as a favorite
 
HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
posted by The Underpants Monster at 5:12 PM on February 22 [5 favorites]


I feel personally attacked.

Which is ironic, considering how relaxed I feel after the hearty laugh I got out of those excellent jokes. that I will repeat, just a bit louder, in the next staff meeting
posted by Greg_Ace at 5:35 PM on February 22 [43 favorites]


prolly use a different name though
posted by Greg_Ace at 5:35 PM on February 22 [26 favorites]


Cutting/sarcastic McSweeney's is far more better than fey/twee McSweeney's.
posted by Lyme Drop at 6:15 PM on February 22 [58 favorites]


Brilliant.
posted by Sparky Buttons at 6:59 PM on February 22


These are on point!
posted by stripesandplaid at 7:06 PM on February 22 [1 favorite]


Too real.
posted by bile and syntax at 8:45 PM on February 22


Lol
posted by eustatic at 10:02 PM on February 22


Greg_Ace wrote:
>prolly use a different name though
We workshopped them round my way (aka repeated just a bit louder in the staff meeting) and found they work well with 'Steve' as the villain of the roast.
posted by k3ninho at 10:50 PM on February 22 [11 favorites]


We have 17 Steves at my company so I can see how that would provide excellent cover.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 1:56 AM on February 23 [16 favorites]


HAHAHA!
The other day we had a shift of roles in a board I'm on, which meant that both the chairman and the deputy were women. We decided that for public events it would work better with a woman and a man on the rostrum, so we appointed a man who was late for the purely ceremonial position of speaker. When he arrived, we told him he had been quota'd in, and we had chosen him specifically because he is the most stylish of the men. We thought it was hilarious. I think every woman on the board repeated it at least once. He didn't.
But he is a good sport, he'll do it.
posted by mumimor at 2:12 AM on February 23 [60 favorites]


But he is a good sport, he'll do it.

The stage manager of the all-female production of Julius Caesar I was in was the only man in the cast or crew. He was so awesome and such a great sport that at the end of the run we declared him an honorary woman. He seemed actually touched.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 6:55 AM on February 23 [30 favorites]


"What’s short, sloppy, and full of periods? Men’s emails."

Yeah, I'm a dude, and I go back and edit my emails so sound less bitchy. Not that I've been called on it, but it's noticeable how much some of the women at work get policed for supposed terseness, when the men do not.
posted by notsnot at 8:25 AM on February 23 [8 favorites]


Gender based generalizations about email quality or niceness are definitely not universal. That one fell very flat based on my experience.

Almost all the others are great though. Thanks for sharing!

But I do think Steve would have been a better choice than Greg.
posted by Caduceus at 11:11 AM on February 23


You know how they say there are often fewer women on tech teams than men named “Matt”?

I started transfeminine hormone therapy at my last job, and I shit you not: they hired another Matt.

I have to give Matt #1 credit, though: he quickly and consistently got my new name and pronouns correct. And I know he really did see me as a woman, because he also started explaining basic concepts to me in great detail and second-guessing every line of code I wrote.
posted by nicepersonality at 11:12 AM on February 23 [144 favorites]


Totally feel you in Matt-struggle, nicepersonality.
posted by jessamyn at 11:23 AM on February 23 [37 favorites]


This is fabulous, and regarding Matts, I just want to say I found a good one! But I have encountered these Matts you speak of and I empathize too...
posted by danabanana at 11:29 AM on February 23 [2 favorites]


Ouch. Reading this was painful.
posted by medusa at 12:05 PM on February 23


I had a cat named Steve, but she was a girl.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 2:05 PM on February 23 [9 favorites]


(I was named Steve, but it turned out I was a girl too.)
posted by nicepersonality at 2:10 PM on February 23 [85 favorites]


What’s completely original but said by two different people? My idea that Greg just repeated louder.

This one hits home. I never know how to address issues like that (and of ‘accidentally’ being left off of meeting invites) without appearing paranoid.
posted by kimberussell at 2:38 PM on February 23 [4 favorites]


And I know he really did see me as a woman, because he also started explaining basic concepts to me in great detail and second-guessing every line of code I wrote.

This is funnier than any of the jokes in the McSweeney bit, and those are pretty funny. But this one made me legit LOL.
posted by LooseFilter at 2:54 PM on February 23 [33 favorites]


Greg_Ace, perhaps thats how Karens feel all the time now.
posted by carlypennylane at 5:24 PM on February 23 [9 favorites]


I had a cat named Steve, but she was a girl.

We had a cocker spaniel named Oscar and a Siamese named Simon growing up. Both of them were female.

One of our friends once asked if we were confused. Nope. Oscar the Grouch was our favorite Sesame Street character and Simon was named after the man who gave us the cat (he was apparently VERY choosy about who got a kitten, my mom insisted on the name).

Note: Simon was for me and she h.a.t.e.d me and adored my brother. It was not until my much-missed Lucy Snowe that I had a cat who loved me.

On topic, this one cut a bit close:

What’s completely original but said by two different people? My idea that Greg just repeated louder.

It is frankly how exhausting how many times this has happened to me. And I HAD allies that actually called the other peeps in the room and gave me credit when it happened.
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 6:44 PM on February 23 [6 favorites]


Why are you tense/why are you rubbing my shoulders is exactly the kind of cringe I was hoping for. Nothing would make me happier than to hear the few women in my office break these out at our next staff meeting.
posted by chasles at 4:31 AM on February 24 [3 favorites]


What’s completely original but said by two different people? My idea that Greg just repeated louder.

It is frankly how exhausting how many times this has happened to me. And I HAD allies that actually called the other peeps in the room and gave me credit when it happened.
Back when I still thought I was a guy, I made such a point about being an ally on this. In meetings, if people were ignoring what a woman said, I'd repeat it, but lead with something like "I like what Rachel said . . ." And if a guy repeated a woman's idea without attribution, I'd often say something like "Thanks for backing Rachel up on that, Steve, I agree she had a good point." That one was fun.
posted by Tabitha Someday at 8:08 AM on February 24 [32 favorites]


nicepersonality, that seems about right. Back in my coding days, I still remember another programmer calmly telling me that her husband (also a programmer) called women's coding "girl code". She was not some kind of shrinking violet, so the fact that she didn't follow that up with "and I am now divorced" surprised me a little.
posted by herd_o_turtles at 10:23 AM on February 24 [3 favorites]


Tabitha Someday, thanks for that. I usually aim for the "I like what Rachel said" thing, but had struggled with how to say/what to do in the second case. I'll try to use that when the situation comes up (and yeah, sadly, there will be a lot of occasions).
posted by Ghidorah at 7:46 PM on February 24 [1 favorite]


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