Oof, boom, er-tum, tootle, yum tah-dah!
February 26, 2020 11:45 PM   Subscribe

This was in a book I had in junior high school, called The Bawdy Bedside Reader.

I took it to school and it made me very popular until it was confiscated.
posted by under_petticoat_rule (15 comments total) 11 users marked this as a favorite
 
That ending was one heck of a plot twist!
posted by rednikki at 12:11 AM on February 27, 2020 [2 favorites]


Am I allowed a link to my own farting poem here? It's called Mushy Peas for Ninja Stealth Farts.

(Scroll down the linked page to find it.)
posted by Paul Slade at 12:22 AM on February 27, 2020


okay serIOUSLY WHAT IN THE HELL
posted by DoctorFedora at 12:25 AM on February 27, 2020


under_petticoat_rule

eponysterical.
posted by chavenet at 12:42 AM on February 27, 2020 [4 favorites]


If you don't fart, you don't shit. If you don't shit, you die!

- Sunday in the Park with George
posted by emf at 1:02 AM on February 27, 2020 [1 favorite]


Seeing Mikado rhyming with barter reminds me of this.
posted by you at 1:26 AM on February 27, 2020 [1 favorite]


These abide by the too-often neglected Rule of Limericks: must be dirty. It isn't just the scansion, it's the filth too.

You: in a lot of English or Scottish accents, or Australian, 'Mikado' would have a soft ending vowel. 'Mik-arder'.
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 1:32 AM on February 27, 2020 [1 favorite]


MetaFilter: I took it to school and it made me very popular until it was confiscated.
posted by GenjiandProust at 2:18 AM on February 27, 2020 [4 favorites]


There are three - no four! - fart-themed FP posts today. May I suggest we all take some of these before our next meal.
posted by RandlePatrickMcMurphy at 6:31 AM on February 27, 2020 [1 favorite]


would it be extremely rude of me to self-promote the fact that I contributed a word to the lexicon?
posted by elkevelvet at 6:32 AM on February 27, 2020 [1 favorite]


Charming and all, but missing a canonical couplet, viz:

There was a young Royal Marine
Who tried to fart God Save The Queen.
But he reached the soprano
And out came the guano;
His britches weren't fit to be seen.

(Ref.)
posted by The Bellman at 7:26 AM on February 27, 2020 [2 favorites]


Six fart-themed posts in one day! #fartbruary
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 7:54 AM on February 27, 2020


Six fart-themed posts in one day! #fartbruary

Not enough for a FPP, but this link brings the recent themes together: Scorpions - Wind of Change
posted by kurumi at 8:38 AM on February 27, 2020


beans beans the musical fruit
the more you eat the more you toot
the more you toot the better your means
so overthink a plate of beans
posted by otherchaz at 8:47 AM on February 27, 2020 [5 favorites]


I'm sure you can look it up, but the art of farting (especially with the Brits, maybe the Germans as well) has a long history.
posted by kozad at 8:22 PM on February 27, 2020


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