💩 Poop your way to victory! 👶🏾

March 18, 2020 7:32 AM

Pooplers [YouTube] [Gameplay Trailer] “Pooplers is a party game. Up to 4 players. As a toddler you have diarrhea. Try to mark your territory over the family house by spreading your poop over a bigger surface of the floor than the other toddlers. Avoid the parent which wants to put you back in your craddle. Chamber pots are safe spots on which the parent will leave you alone. After the timer ends the poopler which covered the biggest part of the floor is declared winner. At the end of the timer the toddler which covered the biggest percentage of the house with his poop is declared winner.” [via: Nintendo Life]
posted by Fizz (30 comments total)

**This post is Johnny Wallflower approved.** 👍🏾
posted by Fizz at 7:32 AM on March 18, 2020 [8 favorites]

An early version of the game is available via Global Game Jam. Free to download.
posted by Fizz at 7:35 AM on March 18, 2020

#AMetaphorForSomethingI'mSure
posted by Halloween Jack at 7:35 AM on March 18, 2020 [2 favorites]

So, anus simulators?
posted by acb at 7:36 AM on March 18, 2020

This also releases on Friday along with Animal Crossing & Doom Eternal. So we all have some tough choices ahead.
posted by Fizz at 7:40 AM on March 18, 2020 [5 favorites]

the cleansing fire cannot come soon enough
posted by lalochezia at 7:42 AM on March 18, 2020 [8 favorites]

Fizz. Fizz. Fizz. WHY?
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 7:46 AM on March 18, 2020 [7 favorites]

Goddammit, Fizz. First a pandemic, now this.
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:51 AM on March 18, 2020 [4 favorites]

This is why we closed the Canadian border to non-essential travel.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:54 AM on March 18, 2020 [15 favorites]

Well, it beats a popplers-based game...slightly.
posted by mittens at 8:01 AM on March 18, 2020 [2 favorites]

The one pooping red should probably seek medical attention.
posted by rudism at 8:04 AM on March 18, 2020 [1 favorite]

Isn’t this just Splatoon, but with poop?
posted by Huffy Puffy at 8:05 AM on March 18, 2020 [5 favorites]

Isn’t this just Splatoon, but with poop?

Pretty much, though I do appreciate the addition of a Mom character that patrols and adds some tension to your poop-trails and the risk of getting caught.
posted by Fizz at 8:06 AM on March 18, 2020 [3 favorites]

GOP simulator
posted by stevis23 at 8:08 AM on March 18, 2020 [2 favorites]

Splatoon, but with poop

Honestly I'm surprised that's not the entire marketing copy right there.
posted by biogeo at 8:08 AM on March 18, 2020 [4 favorites]

Self-quarantine is already getting weird, y'all
posted by Automocar at 8:36 AM on March 18, 2020 [3 favorites]

Why does everything in 2020 have to be Too Real
posted by phooky at 8:38 AM on March 18, 2020 [1 favorite]

Would have been better with Matt Berry doing the voice-over.
posted by Saxon Kane at 8:46 AM on March 18, 2020 [1 favorite]

NOPE
posted by Anonymous at 8:52 AM on March 18, 2020

If you want (what?) something a little more retro in the same vein: DOG! for the C64: “You are DOG! Your aim is to run around in shouty man's garden and poo all over his lawn without getting caught!”
posted by scruss at 8:53 AM on March 18, 2020 [1 favorite]

Big deal. With all those nonpoop colors it’s just like that performance artist in the 60’s who painted with a brush stuck in a lower orifice. Realism, anyone?
posted by njohnson23 at 8:56 AM on March 18, 2020

Hoo boy I did not need to see that. I have been thinking wayyy too much about splatoon lately. I live right outside NYC, so the last few weeks have been: Splatoon, but invisible.
posted by sexyrobot at 8:57 AM on March 18, 2020

Also on team 'this could stand to be way more realistic.' Baby diarrhea already comes in so many different colors. And why stop at one orifice? Definitely needs more 'Barf Baby' and 'Booger Baby.'
posted by sexyrobot at 9:03 AM on March 18, 2020 [1 favorite]

TOO SOON
posted by miles per flower at 9:17 AM on March 18, 2020

Dammit! This would be awesome to play with my kids while they're not in school - except that one of them got a concussion and is on an academic-screens-only (remote learning) medical order. Dammit!
posted by nickmark at 9:42 AM on March 18, 2020

Big deal. With all those nonpoop colors it’s just like that performance artist in the 60’s who painted with a brush stuck in a lower orifice.

I love this. Confronted with a mess made by a baby, you can dismiss it with "Big deal. A modern artist could do that."
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 9:49 AM on March 18, 2020 [2 favorites]

So it's a lot like video cow bingo.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 10:34 AM on March 18, 2020

Is there a roomba power up?
posted by BrotherCaine at 10:43 AM on March 18, 2020 [2 favorites]

TOO SOON. (My children are eight and ten.)

I do appreciate the title, though, which I assume is a portmanteau of "poop" and "Hitler"...?
posted by The Tensor at 11:09 AM on March 18, 2020 [1 favorite]

"poop" and "Hitler"

These days everything is about Trump.
posted by Splunge at 11:33 AM on March 18, 2020 [3 favorites]