This man runs a restaurant

March 29, 2020 7:13 PM

Kenji López-Alt makes Late Night Wrong Pizza. (Guest appearance by a nice dog.)
posted by Going To Maine (57 comments total)

Kenji has been posting a lot of first-person cooking on YouTube lately and it's so great. Especially the "lazy-fancy" videos, like reheating pizza in wonderful ways: Late Night Pizza w/ Crispy Parmesan Crust
posted by ripley_ at 7:27 PM on March 29, 2020 [1 favorite]

Ugh

I really like those videos but watching that one yesterday...

(My hatred for pineapple on pizza is well known enough that my staff insisted on buying at least one Hawaiian pizza each weekly meeting just to annoy me and they ordered our team hats with a pineapple logo on them)
posted by NormieP at 7:28 PM on March 29, 2020 [4 favorites]

I really liked his spaetzle instructional video in the closed wursthall. Just taking advantage of the closure to post good stuff with his head cam. Also: is his dog named Shabu?
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 7:30 PM on March 29, 2020 [1 favorite]

Also: is his dog named Shabu?

That’s what it sounds like to me.
posted by Going To Maine at 7:33 PM on March 29, 2020 [1 favorite]

Kenji has two dogs: Jamón and Shabu.
posted by zamboni at 7:50 PM on March 29, 2020 [4 favorites]

I miss having a dog underfoot in the kitchen.
posted by bonobothegreat at 7:56 PM on March 29, 2020 [2 favorites]

Those are really good dogs. And Jamón is named perfectly- he looks like a little piggy!
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 7:58 PM on March 29, 2020

Or, you can pop a Red Baron in the oven for 15 minutes...

Planning on making pizza dough in the next few days, but, this is way too much effort for "late night" drunken pizza needs...
posted by Windopaene at 8:18 PM on March 29, 2020 [1 favorite]

Oh man, are informal POV cooking videos a thing? Aside from the pineapple, this was pretty relatable. Especially the part where he had to use one burner to light the other and then laughed at the minor fireball that created.

We have a similar but less fancy version of his NYC kitchen, and, well: same.
posted by evidenceofabsence at 8:26 PM on March 29, 2020 [2 favorites]

it was really reassuring for me personally to see that fucking... thing, that dumb plastic pusher that comes with a vitamix, just sort of hanging out on the counter next to the vitamix. like, he's a pro chef and even he doesn't know what the fuck to do with that thing.
posted by phooky at 8:42 PM on March 29, 2020 [14 favorites]

I thought for sure he was gonna burn the bottom. Seriously though, I've got a major cutting board fetish as well.
posted by valkane at 8:48 PM on March 29, 2020 [1 favorite]

I was pleased to see him do procedurally similar ways of setting up ingredients, dealing with waste or small bits, ending up at the fridge “too many” times, twice having trouble getting the handle in the little toaster oven, munching on cheese and salami etc. Also his kitchen is cluttered a bit and not spotless!!
posted by R343L at 8:49 PM on March 29, 2020 [5 favorites]

We have a similar but less fancy version of his NYC kitchen, and, well: same.

I believe Kenji is based in the SF Bay.
posted by Going To Maine at 9:24 PM on March 29, 2020 [2 favorites]

What an amateur. Everyone knows you use a piece of spaghetti to light one burner from another.
posted by praemunire at 9:26 PM on March 29, 2020 [9 favorites]

I want that toaster oven.
posted by RakDaddy at 9:38 PM on March 29, 2020 [2 favorites]

The supermarkets here sell little thin crust pizza blanks, about eight or ten inches across, and on nights when Mrs. Ghidorah is working, I’ll resort to those more than I care to admit. Usually I’ll take a little bit of white sauce, mix it with granulated garlic (or roasted garlic if I’ve got it) a little vinegar (cider if I’ve got it), black pepper, oregano, and a bit of hot sauce. Some crumbled sausage or shredded chicken on the sauce, shredded cheese, then thin sliced onions and mushrooms, maybe a bit of sausage on the top.

Other variations from working a pizza shop:

The Cubano: mojo sauce mixed with a bit of mayonnaise to give it some body, thin sliced ham and Cuban roast pork, mozzarella and Parmesan, thin dill pickle slices. Bake, then lattice mustard over the finished pizza, top with fried onion bits

Pulled pork: Spicy tomato based bbq sauce, pulled pork, pepper jack cheese, Parmesan, thin sliced red onion, diced tomato, little more parm, bake.

The Abomination: oregano, parsley, thyme blended into a white sauce, top with shredded chicken, mozzarella and parm, shredded artichoke and black olive, parm, bake, then top with a reduced balsamic vinegar/mayonnaise sauce). Honestly, I hate artichoke and black olive, but this pizza was sort of amazing.
posted by Ghidorah at 9:48 PM on March 29, 2020 [15 favorites]

Everyone knows you use a piece of spaghetti to light one burner from another.

I thought I was the only person that did that! I actually have a proper long lighter these days, but for a while I was in an apartment where the large burners kept going out, usually when I wanted to boil water for pasta, and thus spaghetti was very convenient.
posted by tavella at 10:19 PM on March 29, 2020

Why did he wait until like 9 minutes in to wash his hands like he'd been out of the house somewhere??

Also, re:pineapple - I've always mistrusted Lopez-Alt, and now I have incontrovertible proof that I was right.

Also also: Ghidorah, I really want a slice of your pulled pork pizza right now.

Also also also: one measly crumb of feta is NOT ENOUGH for such a well-behaved good boy.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:37 PM on March 29, 2020 [1 favorite]

He also gave Shabu a slice of pepperoni since Shabu is a good boy.
posted by mephisjo at 10:46 PM on March 29, 2020

Why did he wait until like 9 minutes in to wash his hands like he'd been out of the house somewhere??

Who here has never closed the barn door of washing their hands 10 or 15 minutes after the horse of preparing food has bolted?
posted by J.K. Seazer at 10:50 PM on March 29, 2020 [6 favorites]

*raises pre-cleaned hand*
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:52 PM on March 29, 2020 [2 favorites]

I have no idea what was going on with the stove there. Why did nothing or the wrong thing work? What do you need the tiny corner of paper for? Why did it explode? Why was the electric igniter just clacking away half the video. I are confuse.
posted by Pyrogenesis at 11:08 PM on March 29, 2020

Sometimes your stove just has a stubborn lighter, and he was gonna transfer over the flame from the good one to the bad one. But then the expanding ball of gas from the bad one got to the flame before he did, so it went FWOOSH.

The constantly-firing igniter annoyed me too, I think it was just him leaving it on that area of the knob and not noticing/caring.
posted by coolname at 1:21 AM on March 30, 2020

He's apparently doing this to support his Patreon. The notion is to raise money to cook meals for medical personnel and vulnerable shut ins, and rehire his staff to keep them whole during the crisis. All of his books’ sales proceeds and YT channel revenue are supporting the same.
posted by Slap*Happy at 3:13 AM on March 30, 2020 [4 favorites]

All of his books’ sales proceeds

I believe that's his cut of the proceeds, which likely isn't all of it.
posted by juv3nal at 4:04 AM on March 30, 2020

> that fucking... thing, that dumb plastic pusher that comes with a vitamix

I threw mine away and haven’t missed it. I forgot it ever existed, actually.
posted by STFUDonnie at 4:36 AM on March 30, 2020 [1 favorite]

Yeah, I was genuinely heartwarmed by the confident pan-toss-and-spin thing and the grotty, greasy, stuck-closed gas range starter.
posted by penduluum at 5:06 AM on March 30, 2020 [1 favorite]

I want that toaster oven.

Looks like a Breville Smart Oven.
posted by zamboni at 5:46 AM on March 30, 2020

I'm a huge Kenji fan, but pineapple on pizza, and also probably burnt garlic.
It just goes to show that all your heroes are flawed humans and that is probably OK.
Good to see the kitchen, though. It makes me feel much better about mine. It doesn't look like their family will starve any time soon. Neither will I.
posted by mumimor at 5:54 AM on March 30, 2020

I knew before I even watched the video that it would be a variation of his tortilla pub pizza recipe. The crusty burnt cheese edges are the best part when I make it at home.
posted by a complicated history at 5:59 AM on March 30, 2020 [2 favorites]

Everyone knows you use a piece of spaghetti

One piece of spaghetti is a spaghetto.
posted by StickyCarpet at 6:19 AM on March 30, 2020 [11 favorites]

It just goes to show that all your heroes are flawed humans and that is probably OK.

He always uses like 2x the fish sauce that's needed for anything.
posted by mikelieman at 6:25 AM on March 30, 2020

in the oroginal latin one piece of pasketti is a paskettum
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 6:29 AM on March 30, 2020 [14 favorites]

in the original latin

Yes, but that only lasted until Latin turned five years old.
posted by StickyCarpet at 6:47 AM on March 30, 2020 [3 favorites]

The pizza is whatever. I want to know more about keeping your whisky in a tupperware in the fridge door, wtf is that about.
posted by solotoro at 8:10 AM on March 30, 2020 [5 favorites]

Oh man, are informal POV cooking videos a thing?

Yes, but this is different. Kenji is one of the best English writers about food and cooking there is. Serious technical chops (including an early stint at America's Test Kitchen), a long career building up Serious Eats, an excellent cookbook, a restaurant. He's got a nerdy / digital native approach that works very well, particularly for a demographic like Metafilter.

So it's an informal POV cooking video from a guy who's a super expert. Only it's late night and he's probably a little high and he's hungry and this expert chef is gonna make some casual simple thing just like you and I would do, only better. They look casual (or in this case, pretty silly) but there's a lot going on in them. The whole series is deligthful.
posted by Nelson at 8:28 AM on March 30, 2020 [4 favorites]

It's nice to see a pro in a kitchen that very obviously gets used all the time. Wonky stove burners, cabinet doors that don't quite close, stuff everywhere. And while that was a lot of work for little payoff (a tiny pizza gone consumed in a few minutes), it sure did look good.
posted by schoolgirl report at 8:43 AM on March 30, 2020

The pizza is whatever. I want to know more about keeping your whisky in a tupperware in the fridge door, wtf is that about.

no ice to dilute? (i'm just guessing, I'm a room temperature man, myself).
posted by valkane at 9:13 AM on March 30, 2020

I want to know more about keeping your whisky in a tupperware in the fridge door, wtf is that about.

Kenji confirmed in the comments that that's wine he grabbed from a keg at work. No word on why it's in a plastic takeout container; I can only assume it's because he's a man of culture.
posted by J.K. Seazer at 11:58 AM on March 30, 2020 [10 favorites]

> that fucking... thing, that dumb plastic pusher that comes with a vitamix

I threw mine away and haven’t missed it. I forgot it ever existed, actually.

Ok, but how do you get the berries to mash up when the blade carves that little hollow space underneath the frozen mass?

Do you just wait and let it whir away until something falls?

Because I'm fond of my vitamix, but the damn thing is loud and the less time it spends running is more time that everyone else in the house can hear their video conference.
posted by madajb at 12:36 PM on March 30, 2020

I love that he twirls the pan as he picks it up. I'm constitutionally incapable of picking up a handled pan without giving it a little twirl.
posted by uncleozzy at 12:42 PM on March 30, 2020 [1 favorite]

Speaking as someone who currently has a Solo cup 2/3 full of red pepper flakes and a Ziploc baggie full of hand sanitizer, sometimes you have to work with the containers you have available.
posted by Lexica at 12:47 PM on March 30, 2020 [4 favorites]

I've been eating a lot of toaster over pizzas based on a packaged naan bread crust lately.
posted by sevenyearlurk at 1:42 PM on March 30, 2020

Ok, but how do you get the berries to mash up when the blade carves that little hollow space underneath the frozen mass?

Bang the thing against the counter to force the stuff down and/or add more liquid
posted by STFUDonnie at 4:00 PM on March 30, 2020

Kenji confirmed in the comments that that's wine he grabbed from a keg at work. No word on why it's in a plastic takeout container; I can only assume it's because he's a man of culture.

We actually ordered takeout from his restaurant this weekend. They gave me bonus beer in plastic take out container because "there's no way we'll be able to get rid of all of this". There was a stack right next to the taps.
posted by Carillon at 4:45 PM on March 30, 2020 [1 favorite]

Man, now I'm craving some pineapple on pizza.
posted by peacheater at 5:23 PM on March 30, 2020 [2 favorites]

I'll make actual pizza dough for pizzas every once in a while but way way more often I'll make tortilla pizzas instead. I always use a baking tray though because I'm making more than one at a time. Much better than pita bread pizzas, which you might think would be better but really aren't.

Tortilla pizzas probably get "invented" all of the time but you never know about it because a) they're so basic no one is going to teach you about them b) you probably aren't going to be served them at someone else's house because they aren't fancy/proper enough and c) they don't make it onto cooking shows. So after the idea pops into your head and you make the first one and it's good you feel proud of your "hack" but only for an instant because you figure that everyone else already knew about them because in retrospect it's pretty obvious. Jam + yogurt = fruit yogurt is another one. There must be tons of these sitting in our heads that we all just came up with ourselves at various times due to boredom, desperation, or creativity and it feels good to see other people doing the same ones. Although I guess that might depend on the person. Like if there was a video of Donald Trump making a late night wrong pizza using tortillas I might feel a small sense of shame about it instead of pride. Or maybe I'd think that he's human too and we all share the common experience of making a tortilla pizza when we're hungry and don't have the time or ingredients to get one with a proper crust.

Also, I felt a sense of recognition when he opened his fridge, like I may have the same one but also suspect that most recent fridges might look like that.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 8:09 PM on March 30, 2020

>I'll make actual pizza dough for pizzas every once in a while but way way more often I'll make tortilla pizzas instead. I always use a baking tray though because I'm making more than one at a time

I have several cast iron pans, so I do an assembly line. Everyone can choose their toppings while the tortilla is cooking and it's being sauced and cheesed, then 90 seconds in the broiler, and then NEXT...
posted by mikelieman at 2:56 AM on March 31, 2020

He always uses like 2x the fish sauce that's needed for anything.

For some it's 2x as much as needed, for others it's only half as much as needed.
posted by ultraviolet catastrophe at 4:50 AM on March 31, 2020 [3 favorites]

Kenji was on The Splendid Table this weekend, telling about the food safety research he did (previously). It's the same thing but as a podcast. Maybe it's something to share. As far as I can judge from the comment sections both places, The Splendid Table has a wider reach than Serious Eats.
posted by mumimor at 5:37 AM on March 31, 2020

A new meal! Late Night Mac and Cheese Quesadilla
posted by Going To Maine at 9:19 AM on April 2, 2020

The parchment paper squares with the smash-burgers is a no-kidding game changer. Sooo flat and crispy, and it doesn't stick at all to my carbon steel plastering-trowel, which I have been trying to build a seasoning upon. Don't need any seasoning or even any oil, just the parchment paper squares. Smoosh, flat, nice.
posted by Slap*Happy at 7:51 AM on April 9, 2020

I actually just discovered last week that parchment paper is the magical ingredient to making pizza on a pizza stone. No more trying to transfer pizza dough to the stone and having it turn into a mess! You just stretch it right on the paper, pick up the edges, and move it to the hot stone with no muss or fuss.
posted by tavella at 8:11 AM on April 9, 2020 [2 favorites]

Yup! Even better you can whisk the parchment paper out from under the pizza after a minute or two, so you still get dough-to-stone contact for a crisper crust.
posted by Nelson at 8:26 AM on April 9, 2020 [1 favorite]

The paper is so thin it doesn't seem to make a difference to me, but either way it has made my scratch pizza making life so much less stressful.
posted by tavella at 3:36 PM on April 9, 2020

You don't have trouble with the parchment burning? Most pizza recipes say to crank the oven all the way up, which is higher than you're supposed to go with parchment, I thought.
posted by Hypocrite_Lecteur at 3:59 PM on April 9, 2020

I was doing 450-475, which results in the edges that aren't on the stone getting brown, but per my sister she's gone to 550 without disaster. If you are really worried about it you can trim the paper so that it's no bigger than the stone? Or remove it once it has started to bake as Nelson suggested?
posted by tavella at 4:18 PM on April 9, 2020