If I Wrote a Coronavirus Episode
April 2, 2020 3:46 PM   Subscribe

Tina Fey, Mike Schur, and 35 more TV writers on what their characters would do in a pandemic. Vulture posed the question to dozens of showrunners, creators, and writers; 37 of them responded with scene scripts, monologues, and episode outlines, including a hilarious Skype session between Frasier and Niles, a classic locker-room speech from Coach Taylor, an excerpt from Selina Meyer’s biography, and a vlog for Rogelio De La Vega’s biggest fans.
posted by pjsky (14 comments total) 15 users marked this as a favorite
Obviously if Leslie Knope were in charge, America would NOT be suffering so horribly right now. Also, I bet she'd have a huge crush on Dr Fauci. And soooooo many binders.
posted by pjsky at 3:48 PM on April 2, 2020 [19 favorites]

This is a fun list, at least for the shows I know. The 30 Rock and Frasier ones felt pretty spot-on - don't forget to follow the links for the full episodes. Picard was a bit long winded but maybe that's how his Captain's Log entries always were.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 3:59 PM on April 2, 2020 [2 favorites]

Needed that🙂 ty
posted by j_curiouser at 4:13 PM on April 2, 2020

Coach Taylor was well-written! And after reading Veep, I just shook my head ... I truly feel sometimes like I slipped into some alternate dimension with very loose restrictions on its realism.
posted by WCityMike at 4:39 PM on April 2, 2020

30 Rock was Gold. How I miss that show.
posted by OHenryPacey at 5:11 PM on April 2, 2020 [7 favorites]

Leslie Knope for President obvs
(Amy Poehler is such a treasure)
#TeamCorona (this includes the beer. Yep I went out days ago for ESSENTIALS)
posted by pipoquinha at 5:24 PM on April 2, 2020 [1 favorite]

Anne, you beautiful, socially distant trout.
posted by michaelh at 6:15 PM on April 2, 2020 [13 favorites]

Rainbow trout, surely?
posted by Pickman's Next Top Model at 7:17 PM on April 2, 2020 [5 favorites]

Glad to see Joe Pera in there. I'd been thinking about that series a lot in context of this crisis, since the tension in the first season comes from his sweet, wide eyed innocence and faith in the good of humanity in contrast to Sarah's fears about the worst of humanity, thus she's very prepared for this.
posted by deadaluspark at 7:39 PM on April 2, 2020

Now I want to rewatch Friday Night Lights; that one was perfect.
posted by Spathe Cadet at 7:49 PM on April 2, 2020

Leslie Knope for President obvs

... with Coach Taylor as her veep and Elmo in charge of national morale.
posted by Paul Slade at 12:04 AM on April 3, 2020 [1 favorite]

I want that Frasier episode to go into production right this minute.

Incidentally, the writer, Christopher Lloyd, is the son of the brilliant comedy writer David Lloyd, who got his own obit post a decade ago. That was one of those obit posts where I learned about the existence of a person who’d brought me untold joy through the years without me knowing they existed.
posted by Kattullus at 2:52 AM on April 3, 2020 [4 favorites]

> Eventually, Leslie would invent some kind of wearable Hula-Hoop rig that would demonstrate how far apart they needed to be.

There's a box of six-foot staves with a "Free distance markers" on the side of the street here.
posted by anadem at 10:11 PM on April 3, 2020 [1 favorite]

This virus is making me thirsty!
posted by snofoam at 3:07 PM on April 4, 2020 [2 favorites]

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