Simon Suggested Setting it in a Pie Crust
April 28, 2020 11:37 PM   Subscribe

Recipe - Translucent Pumpkin Pie

SIMON SUGGESTED SETTING IT IN A PIE CRUST
posted by lucidium (40 comments total) 10 users marked this as a favorite
 
S I M O N S U G G E S T E D S E T T I N G I T I N A P I E C R U S T
posted by lucidium at 11:38 PM on April 28 [4 favorites]


Hey guys maybe we could set it in a pie crust?
posted by Simon Suggests at 11:46 PM on April 28 [14 favorites]


cursed cursed cursed
posted by Mizu at 12:03 AM on April 29 [3 favorites]


what devilry is this
posted by poffin boffin at 12:07 AM on April 29 [2 favorites]


Ugh. Simon suggests? Kids today are getting so soft. In my day Simon didn't suggest, he said! And you'd damn well better do what Simon said or you'd be rightly marked a loser and subject to ridicule from all the other children. Nowadays Simon can only suggest lest someone's precious feelings get hurt from being told what to do. It's no wonder that young people are too afraid to even play games with the other neighborhood children now and hide away in their rooms poking buttons on some "smart" phone for their enjoyment.

Also in my day a slice of pumpkin pie wasn't something that could be hidden behind a Brussels sprout. A slice of pie meant something back then not like this mockery that looks like it could be made from the tears my dear grandmother would cry if she were alive to see what they've done to her lovely autumn dessert.
posted by gusottertrout at 12:12 AM on April 29 [26 favorites]


SMALLER THAN BEFORE
posted by DoctorFedora at 1:39 AM on April 29 [4 favorites]


This “clear lemon meringue pie” picture that I saw on Reddit is fucking me up, it haunts me—Helen Rosner (Twitter link)

I do not want cursed jello in a pie crust, no.
posted by (Over) Thinking at 1:50 AM on April 29 [9 favorites]


How was the Simon Suggests mefi account created on 28 April but this FPP is from 29 April? Someone has way too much time on their hands and/or an impressive commitment to FPP background flavour and/or more executive function than most other people here including myself.
posted by lollusc at 1:54 AM on April 29 [5 favorites]


I should say hat tip to ChinchillaZilla on twitter for setting me off on this journey.
posted by lucidium at 1:57 AM on April 29


I’m sorry, but nobody could rotary-evaporate a pie like my grandma did.
posted by gauche at 4:05 AM on April 29 [15 favorites]


I don't want a kitchen stunt, I want PIE, damnit.
posted by seanmpuckett at 4:40 AM on April 29 [3 favorites]


I would give Alinea's version a try, assuming it will ever be possible to eat at restaurants again, but I have to say the only thing worse than pumpkin pie is pumpkin pie you can't see coming.
posted by emelenjr at 5:08 AM on April 29 [11 favorites]


I don't want a kitchen stunt, I want PIE, damnit

Alinea is like a Monster Truck rally. If you're not going for the stunts, you're going to have a bad time.

OTOH, if you are, you'll pay for all your seat, but all you'll need is the EDGE!!!one!
posted by bonehead at 5:56 AM on April 29 [11 favorites]


Pie is the last honest, sincere thing on this blasted hellscape Earth. Please do not disrupt pie.
posted by Mayor West at 6:08 AM on April 29 [4 favorites]


“In tandem with the pie, diners receive a smoldering birch log that functions as a pedestal for locally foraged sassafras sticks skewered with a caramelized birch marshmallow encasing molten ganache.”
posted by oulipian at 6:17 AM on April 29 [10 favorites]


cursed jello in a pie crust not only sounds yummy, it's a great name for my next band.
(might need some umlauts though)
posted by MtDewd at 6:37 AM on April 29 [2 favorites]


I was able to go to Alinea a few months ago, the Kitchen Table, and let me just say it was a really fun experience. I've eaten at a lot of fine dining and have honestly kinda gotten tired of it. Alinea was actually fun. It didn't take itself seriously, it had lots of silly gimmicks and tricks but the waiter was laughing along with us so it was all fine. And just when it got too silly they busted out an old school Steak Diane perfectly cooked and prepared tableside, the 1940s version of showmanship food. Loved it.

This "clear gelatin pie" thing is making the rounds this week. National-treasure-in-the-making Helen Rosner set off a bunch of discussion with a photo of a clear lemon meringue pie from Reddit.

For those who don't have a rotary evaporator, there's simpler techniques for making cursed pies. This clear lemon meringue pie is basically Jello, using only lemon essence, citric acid, and sugar in the filling with the gelatin. It sounds gross TBH but it looks pretty. You can also use agar to clarify citrus juices and other things. Maybe not pumpkin.
posted by Nelson at 6:47 AM on April 29 [9 favorites]


Maybe you’d rather just have cake.
posted by kinnakeet at 6:51 AM on April 29 [2 favorites]


A rotovap is $5k to $10k new depending on options---I generally buy one or two a year. For a place like Alinea, that's an expensive toy, but within reach. In daily use, most models will last a decade or more.

A pot still would be its nearest stove-top replacement, and those can be had (modulo regional legality) for a couple hundred dollars or so. But they're considerably more skill to use, finicky-er etc... Rotovaps do the same thing every time without a lot of fuss, and often have a bunch more distillation plates than simple stills, so they're quicker, and don't need multiple passes to get high-purity results, like refined pumpkin essences.
posted by bonehead at 7:09 AM on April 29 [3 favorites]


Is Jello in a crust really a pie though? What if it was purple Jello instead of pumpkin flavored? Would that be a pie?

Is "pie" just anything in a crust or is there more to it than that.
posted by sotonohito at 7:33 AM on April 29 [3 favorites]


I was able to go to Alinea a few months ago, the Kitchen Table, and let me just say it was a really fun experience.

We were at the Aviary, the bar, in February, and it was the most fun we've had in a fine dining place in ages too. Fun is absolutely the best way to describe the drinks, food and service. Really a highlight of a great city.
posted by bonehead at 7:34 AM on April 29


Is Jello in a crust really a pie though? What if it was purple Jello instead of pumpkin flavored? Would that be a pie?

Jello pie is a thing, maybe it's a southern thing? The benefit is that you don't have to bake it, it sets in the fridge. Nice in the summer.
posted by muddgirl at 7:59 AM on April 29 [1 favorite]


This looks very fun to make, although I’d never eat it! (I hate jello in the best of times. Although aspic is my jam. Go figure. Speaking of, wouldn’t it be fun to make a savory meat pie like this? Aspic to the max).

These clear pies also remind me of water pie...It cracks me up that, traditionally, people try and make no food look like lots of food (like with water pie), and in this case, the restaurant is making lots of food look like no food!

I actually like the whimsy....can’t eat whimsy for dinner, though! (Or, maybe according to this restaurant, you can?)
posted by rue72 at 7:59 AM on April 29 [4 favorites]


I haven't been to Alinea, but I've eaten at other molecular gastronomy restaurants and the mind fuck of flavours coming in textures and packages you wouldn't expect is a huge part of the experience. I remember eating a dish that looked exactly like a perfectly round, ripe cherry tomato and which tasted like the most carroty carrot you ever had. So, distilled pumpkin pie jello is interesting. I'd love to try it, though I probably wouldn't want to try it at Thanksgiving dinner in place of the real thing. Sometimes you want what is traditional and sometimes food can be fun.

If this article had been published now, amidst COVID-19 and people feeling the pinch of food insecurity, it would seem really appalling, but it's 3 years old.
posted by jacquilynne at 8:21 AM on April 29 [1 favorite]


and the mind fuck of flavours coming in textures and packages you wouldn't expect is a huge part of the experience.

I am just not cut out to be a sophisticated diner, I have never wanted to eat food that messes with me. I don't mind someone saying "try this, it's really good!" for something new, but the whole "is it even food? How does it taste? We have concealed or eliminated all context clues, (or even made it look offputting) guess you don't know till it hits your tongue!" approach has never been appealing. But hey, it's a big world, room for all kinds of eating.
posted by emjaybee at 9:49 AM on April 29 [1 favorite]


Is Jello in a crust really a pie though?

Like all pies it is really an open-faced sandwich, speaking topologically.

(though I suppose covered pies are burritos)
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 9:51 AM on April 29 [8 favorites]


> I have never wanted to eat food that messes with me.

I felt that way the first time I had lavender ice cream. It looked like ice cream, it felt like ice cream, but lavender says "soap" to me.
posted by The corpse in the library at 10:33 AM on April 29 [1 favorite]


I get that on the bleeding edge taste is everything and color is nothing, but is texture also nothing? It's just going to be fine to have the pie crust be the right texture and the meringue or the whipped cream be the right texture but the pie innards be a gelatinous horror tragedy? Why include the prosaic parts of the pie at all? Why not present the pumpkin aspic on a shard of glacial ice behind the word cucurbit printed in purified ostrich blood on onionskin paper in whatever is currently the Best Font?
posted by Don Pepino at 10:41 AM on April 29 [4 favorites]


About two years ago, I bought an almost unused Polyscience rotovap at a university surplus sale for cheap. It's a super-fiddly thing that sits, unused, in a garage shelf. It needs some extra goodies that are pricey but I guess that it may be time to get it working and play around with it.
posted by bz at 10:45 AM on April 29


It's just going to be fine to have the pie crust be the right texture and the meringue or the whipped cream be the right texture but the pie innards be a gelatinous horror tragedy?

Well, to be fair, even in a proper lemon meringue pie the pie innards are that particular consistency. (In a good way, mind you.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:06 AM on April 29 [1 favorite]


If this article had been published now, amidst COVID-19 and people feeling the pinch of food insecurity, it would seem really appalling, but it's 3 years old.

Though, rethinking this which I wrote earlier, it's not like food insecurity is new. Just more prevalent or more obvious and talked about. So it would be particularly appalling now. But it was always at least somewhat appalling. Just, you know, ordinarily appalling in the way that many of the things those of us with privilege do in late stage capitalism are.
posted by jacquilynne at 11:24 AM on April 29


in a proper lemon meringue pie the pie innards are that particular consistency.
No they absolutely are not. They are deliciously creamy, not gelatinous, because the thickener is starch (or condensed milk), not gelatin. Even if you do make a JELL-O pie, which don't, you're going to mix in eggs, so among its myriad other flaws will not be that heartbreaking soulless alien aspic nightmare quality.
posted by Don Pepino at 12:45 PM on April 29 [2 favorites]


I generally buy one or two [rotovaps] a year

What are you doing back there?
posted by STFUDonnie at 4:32 PM on April 29 [3 favorites]


Wait, you can really distill stuff and mimic a rotavap on a stovetop?... Obvious in retrospect. But I guess special glassware and tubing is needed for that then?

I checked Google and indeed there are gelatin-clarified pumpkin juice pies. Those pies are golden-hued gels. Also pumpkin consommes are similar. Maybe not the same intense taste though, and I assume Alinea already tested that out before preferring a preparation by distillation.
posted by polymodus at 4:40 PM on April 29


Why not present the pumpkin aspic on a shard of glacial ice behind the word cucurbit printed in purified ostrich blood on onionskin paper in whatever is currently the Best Font?

That's still Papyrus, right? Right.

(Thinking about it, you could lay the onionskin paper on Papyrus and then use the Papyrus font but use the "hieroglyphs" from Lotus Notes when you punched in your password. Maybe the entree would have been frogs and locusts....)
posted by a non mouse, a cow herd at 5:04 PM on April 29 [1 favorite]


I love jello. I love pie. this sounds like the start of a haiku.
Lemon pie (meringue doesn't do it for me on top of pie). Fresh strawberry pie made with corn starch glaze/mortar because I grew up in the Midwest. Jello pie? No, no no no. NO.
posted by theora55 at 7:38 PM on April 29


Jello pie is a thing, maybe it's a southern thing?

This got to be a southern thing because I remember this every summer growing up.
posted by bradbane at 9:37 PM on April 29


> you can really distill stuff and mimic a rotavap on a stovetop?

*power walks past clattering a metal mixing bowl, ice, and a small cup inside a stock pot*
posted by lucidium at 10:55 PM on April 29 [2 favorites]


“In tandem with the pie, diners receive a smoldering birch log that functions as a pedestal for locally foraged sassafras sticks skewered with a caramelized birch marshmallow encasing molten ganache.”

then it tells you who killed Laura Palmer
posted by taquito sunrise at 1:35 AM on April 30 [2 favorites]


I can even think of two different kinds of Jello pie. One is jello+cool whip, the other uses jello to set a fruit pie, usually strawberry.
posted by muddgirl at 9:39 AM on April 30


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