Does it matter if it was a nurse shark?
March 12, 2021 3:02 PM   Subscribe

 
Hate it when that happens...
posted by Windopaene at 3:07 PM on March 12, 2021 [7 favorites]


why he drowns/bleeds to death and the shark eats him and then everyone wonders how the hell he found a shark in wyoming
posted by pyramid termite at 3:17 PM on March 12, 2021 [14 favorites]


As this is Wyoming, first, you're gonna need a bigger boat.
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 3:22 PM on March 12, 2021 [3 favorites]


Presumably the shark is now .0001% less likely to get severe COVID.
posted by BrotherCaine at 3:37 PM on March 12, 2021 [8 favorites]


i am not going to google nurse shark

i am not going to google nurse shark

i am not going to google nurse shark

WAIT THIS IS A REAL THING WTF I WAS EXPECTING SOME PORN SHIT
posted by Foci for Analysis at 4:02 PM on March 12, 2021 [20 favorites]


Ugh, just wait your turn, shark. I hate these "phases" too but it's the best system we've got.
posted by The corpse in the library at 4:02 PM on March 12, 2021 [27 favorites]


deploy the lasers
posted by clavdivs at 4:04 PM on March 12, 2021 [1 favorite]


Depends, was the shark wearing a mask?
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:04 PM on March 12, 2021 [1 favorite]


https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/9144463/

Granted it wasn't a human and a shark but science has an answer!
posted by Obscure Reference at 4:06 PM on March 12, 2021 [1 favorite]


The vaccine should still be effective. Assuming the vaccine was administered correctly into the deltoid muscle, it disperses almost immediately into the connective tissue and fascial planes and is taken up quickly into the blood vessels. Part of the reason the injection is done into the muscle is because there are a lot of blood vessels in muscle. Your blood circulates completely around your body every 45 seconds so you would have some vaccine circulating everywhere in less than a minute, and it probably takes 10-20 minutes to absorb completely. So if you waited a full 47 minutes to be bitten by a shark, you should be just as as vaccinated as someone who did not lose their arm.
posted by The Elusive Architeuthis at 4:08 PM on March 12, 2021 [51 favorites]


Oh! I know this one! I studied lipid/muscle/skeletal diffusion AND I've been bitten by a nurse shark.

If the vaccine hit muscle tissue there is no issue. However, a lipid injection will need another shot.

Sadly, the nurse shark will not see any benefit due to the action of digestive enzymes and lack of exposure of the gill membranes to a working dose of blood borne antibodies.

As a note: A nurse shark large enough to remove an adult human limb will be quite mature and large. I've only seen a nurse shark that large in a Bahamian marine sanctuary. You are unlikely to encounter such a specimen in the mid-West USA. The best you can hope for is a gentle nip from a much smaller creature.

(The Elusive Architect beat me to the punch! Jolly Good Show!)
posted by pdoege at 4:15 PM on March 12, 2021 [54 favorites]


This is called "jabbing the shark" and it usually occurs late in the vaccination cycle, when it's ok to be funny again but you've kind of lost the plot and are having trouble letting go, sort of a reluctant "farewell to arms," if you will.
posted by chavenet at 4:22 PM on March 12, 2021 [44 favorites]


There may be some soreness.
posted by anshuman at 4:24 PM on March 12, 2021 [32 favorites]


MetaFilter: The best you can hope for is a gentle nip from a much smaller creature.
posted by Splunge at 4:28 PM on March 12, 2021 [6 favorites]



This is called "jabbing the shark" and it usually occurs late in the vaccination cycle, when it's ok to be funny again but you've kind of lost the plot and are having trouble letting go, sort of a reluctant "farewell to arms," if you will.


i bloody well will not!
posted by lalochezia at 4:54 PM on March 12, 2021 [4 favorites]


Good news, the vaccine was administered long enough before the incident that if it was correctly done it remains effective.

Bad news: Bats are not the only creatures that are vectors for unusual viral strains that can cause pandemics. The shark that bit you has just made you Patient Zero for the in-coming outbreak of Covid-21, a new coronavirus entirely unrelated to the current one.
posted by Jane the Brown at 5:21 PM on March 12, 2021 [6 favorites]


A lot of people get nurses and nurse sharks confused, but there’s an easy way to tell them apart. Just remember this little rhyme: a nurse with legs will do you no harm, while a nurse with fins will rip off your arm.

It’s saved me quite a few times, let me tell you!
posted by dephlogisticated at 5:29 PM on March 12, 2021 [56 favorites]


The shark that bit you has just made you Patient Zero for the in-coming outbreak of Covid-21, a new coronavirus entirely unrelated to the current one.

And if your arm got taken off by a Komodo dragon instead of a shark? Fuggedaboutit.
posted by Insert Clever Name Here at 5:29 PM on March 12, 2021 [2 favorites]


On a slightly more serious note, I'd love to see some data on how much protection the immunosuppressed are getting.

They've put me in a study for the COVID-19 vaccine under conditions of autoimmune disorder and its treatment - looks like several are underway for immunosuppression.
posted by save alive nothing that breatheth at 5:41 PM on March 12, 2021 [5 favorites]


Teegeack... , based on my extensive Pubmed searching, there may not be a lot of conclusive data to answer your question. Older papers looking at previous vaccines (so not mRNA vaccines and certainly not covid) showed mixed efficacy in the immunosuppressed depending on the vaccine itself and on the immunosuppressive agent. My own self interest is about enbrel so that’s what my search focused on and my overall meta analysis was that enbrel was not a concern but that other agents, including methotrexate, that might have been prescribed instead were. I was still not 100% convinced of the applicability to enbrel in the current situation. I imagine enbrel is also not the agent of your interest, as transplants require a different regimen of immunosuppression. This probably doesn’t answer your question but stresses the importance of the list of studies save alive... cites.
posted by Tandem Affinity at 9:20 PM on March 12, 2021 [2 favorites]




Obviously, the shark is going to start getting some amazing 5g signal on their cellphone.
posted by jenkinsEar at 4:15 AM on March 13, 2021 [13 favorites]


You're going to have a very interesting entry in the vaccine adverse effects database, at least.
posted by biogeo at 9:36 AM on March 13, 2021 [2 favorites]


What if a shark was going to bite off someone’s arm, but you could throw a switch, and, instead, the shark would bite off five other arms — would it be moral to do so?
posted by GenjiandProust at 12:43 PM on March 13, 2021 [2 favorites]


Where's the switch to throw so that nobody loses an arm?
posted by Greg_Ace at 1:08 PM on March 13, 2021


Where's the switch to throw so that nobody loses an arm?

That switch was decommissioned in 2020. Budget cuts.
posted by GenjiandProust at 2:30 PM on March 13, 2021 [2 favorites]


Well then I'm striking for better sharking working conditions.

WHAT DO WE WANT
NO MEGALODONT
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:49 PM on March 13, 2021 [1 favorite]


It's a shame Wyoming didn't buy that aircraft carrier, lest they could mobilize against the covid sharks.
posted by msbutah at 9:53 AM on March 16, 2021


« Older Vaccine Scarcity: A Policy Choice That Prolongs...   |   The Indignities and Mediocrity of Brute White... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments