Pentagon spokesman gets asked about Polish strippers and geopolitics
April 27, 2021 2:29 PM   Subscribe

When the Pentagon spokesman gets asked about Polish strippers and geopolitics: "Bravo Zulu to Pentagon spokesman John Kirby, a retired admiral, who calmly and professionally responded to the most bizarre question posed to a defense official in recent memory."

Stars and Stripes first reported Monday on Booze, a strip club and a major gone missing: How a 101st Airborne unit went off the rails in Poland. At a U.S. Department of Defense briefing on Monday, the Task & Purpose Pentagon reporter asked the spokesman - Adm (Ret.) John Kirby - about the geopolitical implications of the story, and gave kudos to him for the measured response.

"Task & Purpose’s senior Pentagon reporter is a well-known bastard, and he’s just the type of person to play up the seediness of it all."
posted by gemmy (21 comments total) 8 users marked this as a favorite
 
Seems like Journalists who regularly attend White House Press events are missing the Trump Circus already.

Good Grief.
posted by Faintdreams at 3:04 PM on April 27, 2021


Foxtrot Uniform to the intrepid reporter who resorted to furious masturbation to pad out the word count after the equivocal admiral punted his question: "But I don’t know anything about this particular item."
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 3:04 PM on April 27, 2021 [13 favorites]


It’s a rare situation when a Pentagon spokesperson is the least sordid thing in a story....
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:19 PM on April 27, 2021 [1 favorite]


When the article first mentioned the apache helicopter I thought "how did they get THAT inside the strip club?"
posted by lalochezia at 4:33 PM on April 27, 2021 [5 favorites]


I am surprised and delighted that my birth country has made the international news for reasons other than cartoonish homophobia.
posted by confluency at 5:06 PM on April 27, 2021 [4 favorites]


I can't figure out what the angle here is. The question is unusual, as is the situation in question, but if seems like when American military personnel (especially officers) behave poorly, that there are going to be questions. So there's nothing unusual about a question being asked. The spokesperson answered the question professionally, as expected. So there's nothing unusual about his response. Does this article just exist so the author can talk about his "total lack of any kind of a filter" and then pat himself on the back for being "a well-known bastard"?
posted by jonathanhughes at 5:09 PM on April 27, 2021 [12 favorites]


how did they get THAT inside the strip club?

A big tip to the doorman and a lot of lubricant one assumes. Someone probably had to cover the helicopter's minimum drinks - not sure they serve JP-8 at bars.
posted by inflatablekiwi at 5:26 PM on April 27, 2021 [2 favorites]


Does this article just exist so the author can talk about his "total lack of any kind of a filter" and then pat himself on the back for being "a well-known bastard"?

Bingo. I suspect that someone facing the first lack of an American war in a generation and change might be trying to make hay while the sun shines.
posted by Halloween Jack at 5:31 PM on April 27, 2021 [1 favorite]


Task and Purpose is run by the same guy who used to run Duffelblog. This is not a serious article.
posted by corb at 5:31 PM on April 27, 2021 [2 favorites]


Warsaw Pact now massing strippers towards the Fulda Gap.

Tom Clancy's "Champaign Room"
posted by nickggully at 6:24 PM on April 27, 2021 [3 favorites]


Count me among those who don't understand what we're supposed to be discussing here and what's funny. The allegation is that someone was assaulted and taken advantage of. Is it funny because the alleged assailant is a stripper and the person assaulted a man (a soldier, too)? Men can't be victims and women are weak - hilarious! Is it funny because the soldier has allegedly lied about being assaulted because the story is difficult to believe? A soldier lied and accused someone of assault and theft - oh my sides! A reporter asked a question that vaguely touched on sex and it was handled rather professionally? ...?

I'm not a kill joy. What am I missing here?
posted by ElKevbo at 6:27 PM on April 27, 2021 [3 favorites]


This is not a serious article.

If it's supposed to be a humor article, it fails at that too.

But maybe it's not for me. Despite being in the military and "getting" the jokes, Duffleblog always felt just as funny to me as "Humor in Uniform" and "Life in These United States" in Reader's Digest.
posted by ctmf at 6:35 PM on April 27, 2021 [3 favorites]


How a 101st Airborne unit went off the rails in Poland

So, at least while they were receiving lap dances, there really was a 101st Chairborne division. All those Bush II War bloggers are finally vindicated.
posted by Harvey Kilobit at 6:56 PM on April 27, 2021 [1 favorite]


My theory, 'twas all about the bit about them biting his nipples to keep him awake.

Simulated consent?
posted by goinWhereTheClimateSuitsMyClothes at 8:03 PM on April 27, 2021


I'm not a kill joy. What am I missing here?

I thought it was a bit of a crazy story that might be fun to discuss, and that the spokesperson handled it well. It definitely is an unusual question to hear at a Pentagon briefing, IME. The framing of the secondary story amused me, that's all. Feel free to disregard as frivolous if you like.
posted by gemmy at 8:34 PM on April 27, 2021 [3 favorites]


Despite being in the military and "getting" the jokes, Duffleblog always felt just as funny to me as "Humor in Uniform" and "Life in These United States" in Reader's Digest.

I always got the impression from military people that most of them put it more on a par with the Onion; something like "Pentagon celebrates its military children with gifts of lifelong therapy and alcoholism" would never have shown up in Reader's Digest.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:39 PM on April 27, 2021 [4 favorites]


Nothing is more insufferable than a dude who’s genuinely pleased with his own “cleverness”.
posted by Big Al 8000 at 9:52 PM on April 27, 2021 [3 favorites]


FYI, predatory strip clubs (called go go clubs here) have been a major issue in Poland for over 5 years now - the news is full of stories like that happening to tourists and businessmen. Girls stand outside and pick out the most rich and intoxicated men to target. Once inside, they're further drugged, talked into crazily expensive drinks and not told what the prices are. 30K PLN seems to be the standard amount to take a guy for. Recently a very stubborn lawyer won restitution (as in, just his money back) in a civil trial based on the fact he wasn't conscious enough to form a contract, and that took him nearly 5 years. Multiple criminal investigations have failed because victims usually realise the extent of their losses once the card statement comes in, and by then the drugs are out of their system.

In conclusion: the Air Force's actual error here is not warning their staff about a common and dangerous scam. For which I blame US puritanism to some extent, because if they told them prostitution is legal in Poland, I'm betting the flyboys would bypass the club entirely...
posted by I claim sanctuary at 11:59 PM on April 27, 2021 [7 favorites]


Look, Mom, I made an entire article of me asking a single question at a press conference.
posted by jfwlucy at 1:29 AM on April 28, 2021 [1 favorite]


Some times these little stories lead to much larger stories. Fat Leonard being an example.
posted by srboisvert at 5:15 AM on April 28, 2021 [1 favorite]


Can we talk about how that unit has a war crime (the killing of surrendering combatants) as their unit nickname? That seems like a bad thing?
posted by Canageek at 9:43 AM on April 28, 2021


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