I’m studying sn-risks. . .
May 4, 2022 4:38 PM   Subscribe

 
Oh, this is good.
posted by loquacious at 4:59 PM on May 4, 2022


That was a fun read. Longer than I expected, but had a better payoff than I expected to.
posted by hippybear at 5:08 PM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]


And by good I mean horrible.

And by horrible as in I mean I want to reincarnate myself as the KLF and burn a several billion Euros worth of various cryptocoins on a paper wallet in front of a bunch of cryptobros genetically, hormonally and surgically modified to be able to be pregnant with clones of people with highly punchable faces like Matt Gaetz and Ted Cruz. And then unleash a 500 foot tall Kaiju in the shape of Cory Doctorow on Sunnyvale.
posted by loquacious at 5:08 PM on May 4, 2022 [17 favorites]


I am only halfway through the post, but you all have wandered into the conversations I have in my head. By myself. Every day. All day.

I plunge myself into internet information in order to quiet the voices, but I wind up feeding the fires.

True story: I once went into a high end bookstore in Orange County - back when they existed - and was going to get a book on existential philosophy, because I admired a friend who read philosophy. The back cover of the book described existentialism as the "journey of discovery based on one's own path and experiences". I said "okay", put the book back on the shelf and was done. I had read all I needed to know.

I've wondered for years if whale beachings are a religious exercise. Whale religion. Why not? Think about what it is like to be a whale or a dolphin.

And so on.

So, at parties I drink, and try not to be one of those guys.
posted by Xoebe at 5:20 PM on May 4, 2022 [5 favorites]


There've definitely been times when I'd have taken advantage of an app similar to partyr tbh.
posted by Carillon at 5:20 PM on May 4, 2022


War Risk Insurance.
posted by clavdivs at 5:35 PM on May 4, 2022 [3 favorites]


Dove in, got to his part before I was like, okay who is this idiot, and like oops it's the lovable eugenicist asshole SSC fucker Scott Siskind lol.
“Yeah - are you smirking? You’re not one of those freeze peach people, are you?”

“I guess sort of . . . “

“Whatever, I know everyone hates us [Twitter]. But let me tell you, it’s not all just banning any conservative who gets too popular, or burying stories that embarrass the establishment candidate a week before an election.[...]
posted by fleacircus at 6:00 PM on May 4, 2022 [29 favorites]


This part is utter horseshit:
You...strike up a conversation with the guy to your right.

“So what do you do?”

“Nothing. I got fired a few weeks ago.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s fine. You know what they say. People are like clay pots - getting fired just makes them stronger.”

“I never heard anyone say that.”

“No, really, it’s fine. I’m not even bitter. Just - five years working on the Trust And Safety team at Twitter, and Musk comes in and fires me just like that.”

“Oh, you were involved in that!”

“Yeah - are you smirking? You’re not one of those freeze peach people, are you?”

“I guess sort of . . . “

“Whatever, I know everyone hates us. But let me tell you, it’s not all just banning any conservative who gets too popular, or burying stories that embarrass the establishment candidate a week before an election. We did good, important work.”

“Like what?”

“Like - have you heard of the Temple of Artemis? One of the Seven Wonders of the World. Burned down not by a Christian or a Muslim, but by a random Greek guy who wanted his name to be remembered by history, and figured that burning the most beautiful building in the world would ensure it. The Greeks responded by banning anyone from mentioning or recording his name, but the historian Theopompus wrote it down anyway, and it’s survived to the current day. No, I won’t tell it to you. Anyway, I was going to lead a consortium with the censors at Google, Wikipedia, Facebook, all the big name sites. We were finally going to complete the ancient Greeks’ work. We were going to memory-hole this guy’s name from the Internet. Even the people at Amazon were going to be on board - they would stop selling editions of the Theopompus book that gives his name. And then, finally, the burning of the Artemision would be properly avenged. We were this close! And then some dumb billionaire waltzes in and says ‘muh free speech’ and ruins everything!”

“I actually don’t think that saying ‘we should be able to unperson whoever we want’ helps your case that this is valuable and non-creepy.’

“The Temple of Artemis burner was just the beginning. The ancients used damnatio memoriae as a frequent punishment. How frequent? We don’t know! There’s no way of knowing! We only know when someone like Theopompus defects from the plan. How many ancient Hitlers and Stalins might there have been, now totally forgotten? And how many others were dissuaded from murder or other abominable acts because of the fear of erasure? And now that tool is lost to us forever. I hope you enjoy the world that you and your freeze peach buddies have created.” He storms off in a huff.
And then I remembered: Scott Alexander previously on Metafilter.

On preview: I'm with fleacircus.
posted by Lyme Drop at 6:02 PM on May 4, 2022 [15 favorites]


I think we need a meme for Bay area parties in the 90s.

"Is there a faster x86 chip coming out soon"

"Yes"
posted by credulous at 6:24 PM on May 4, 2022 [4 favorites]


Dove in, got to his part before I was like, okay who is this idiot, and like oops it's the lovable eugenicist asshole SSC fucker Scott Siskind lol.

Ugh apparently i need to re-read while less distracted without skimming the shibboleths.

But I do mean the horrible part. Also: *points at 500 foot tall Cory Doctorow flailing about leveling a city and looking for a functioning Radio Shack*
posted by loquacious at 6:25 PM on May 4, 2022 [4 favorites]


Huh, I guess it’s not one of the house parties in my neighborhood made up of laboring minorities. But yeah I do know folks like this too. Guess the author only goes to the rich people parties.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 6:44 PM on May 4, 2022 [3 favorites]


Or..if you’re surrounded by techbros, maybe you’re a techbro.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 6:46 PM on May 4, 2022 [7 favorites]


I thought it was kinda weird that the top comment is a Putin apologist.
posted by credulous at 6:48 PM on May 4, 2022


I think it's safe to say that most people underestimate sn-risks, pretty much by definition.
posted by allegedly at 6:58 PM on May 4, 2022 [2 favorites]


Before I knew who the author was, I read the Twitter bit as sarcasm (like "that's what you free speech guys think we do all day"). Overall it's still hilariously accurate. Heartbreaking the worst person you know etc.
posted by airmail at 7:02 PM on May 4, 2022 [2 favorites]


It breaks my heart for this piece to have so much garbage blended in (nonsense re: Twitter & Musk, very kind to treat Peter Thiel as an eccentric crank rather than an extremist revolutionary tax cheat).

"Horse archers, dude." is one of my favorite catchphrases when talking about European history, languages, etc. Just fuckin' horse archers, dude.

"Why isn't Magyar related to its neighbors?" "Horse archers, dude"

"Why is Turkish such a weird language?" "Horse archers, dude"

"Why is Russia the way it is?" "Fuckin' horse archers, dude."
posted by MengerSponge at 7:02 PM on May 4, 2022 [9 favorites]


Guess the author only goes to the rich people parties.

Probably not. Silicon Valley rich people parties is a whole different article.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 7:20 PM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]


There's a point a friend of mine made that there were, like, 18th and 19th century novelists who did unerring closely-observed satires of particular elite groups, and whose politics were APPALLINGLY elitist. And that it's unlikely we'd get the former without the latter, because people who DIDN'T have those attitudes generally didn't get invited into the right rooms nor have the spare time and so on to write a lot.

I laughed aloud at this and am glad I read it.

BTW did we ever figure out who made Iterating Grace?
posted by brainwane at 7:37 PM on May 4, 2022 [3 favorites]


there were, like, 18th and 19th century novelists who did unerring closely-observed satires of particular elite groups, and whose politics were APPALLINGLY elitist

I have a book for you to read and it is called Private Citizens
posted by lorddimwit at 7:56 PM on May 4, 2022 [1 favorite]


The music is pounding, head-splitting, amelodious. Everyone is struggling to speak over it. Everyone assumes everyone else likes it.

Perhaps I'm not being fair, but this really irritated me and I stopped reading here, at the end of the very first paragraph. It immediately sets up the narrator as superior to everyone in the room, a keener observer, immune to the groupthink their minds all stew in. To hell with that.

(In fact, lots of people like going to parties with loud music, and what is happening here is that the narrator is struggling to conceive of people liking music he's unable to, and has to resort to the comforting story that it must be that actually nobody likes it, they only pretend to in order to fit in with what they deludedly believe other people's preferences to be.)
posted by escabeche at 8:24 PM on May 4, 2022 [13 favorites]


It immediately sets up the narrator as superior to everyone in the room, a keener observer, immune to the groupthink their minds all stew in.

"The cynic's vanity—the one which gives him license to be scornful where other men delight—is the assumption that he knows the inner workings of things." — John Myers Myers

Definitely not everyone’s cup of tea.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 8:32 PM on May 4, 2022 [8 favorites]


Why are we giving eugenicist Scott Siskind the time of day, exactly?
posted by NoxAeternum at 8:32 PM on May 4, 2022 [22 favorites]


The casual othering of the transgender person (they/them pronouns! how quaint!) and the Asian person (where race isn't otherwise mentioned, so you know the writer sees White as default), as well as the earnest both-sides enlightened centrism, bothered me enough to stop reading halfway through.

Lo and behold, it's the enlightened-centrist supershitlord Scott Alexander himself.
posted by splitpeasoup at 9:51 PM on May 4, 2022 [15 favorites]


This is no Nate the Snake. Good try but no, you will never regret spending your time on this drivel more than you will on the time you lost on Nate the Snake. But it's honestly worth it. I know that doesn't make sense but maybe it will after you read it. Previously
posted by treepour at 10:57 PM on May 4, 2022 [5 favorites]


You want party scenes that skewer the pompous elite, then you want The Recognitions.

Parties loom large in The Recognitions. One scene unfurls across nearly 200 pages. Because of the pandemic, I was unable to tell while reading if this seemed like a really good party and I wanted to be there, or if it was more like the kind of soirees James Baldwin found himself at when he, like Gaddis, lived in the Village in the late forties: “It was a time of the most terrifying personal anarchy. If one gave a party, it was virtually certain that someone, quite possibly oneself, would have a crying jag or have to be restrained from murder or suicide.” This is the hectic energy that pervades the middle section of Gaddis’s novel: characters are jittery from too many cigarettes, take their lives in bathtubs, swallow over-the-counter amphetamines without even a glass of water, dabble in heroin and spend the night searching for marijuana, which still goes by the street name of “tea.” So much gin gets guzzled I got a stomach ulcer just thinking about it, but it’s also a scene for flirting, mistaken identities, meeting new people, and long discussions of artworks that people plan to make but never quite do. In short, a bunch of fake people on the make, the sort of place where a character like Agnes Deigh (a suicidal literary agent with a Mickey Mouse wristwatch) can say, “No matter how bad a book is, it’s unique, but people are all so ordinary,” and keep a straight face.
posted by chavenet at 2:18 AM on May 5, 2022 [5 favorites]


I know that doesn't make sense but maybe it will after you read it.

Nate the Snake is totally worth it.
posted by chavenet at 2:32 AM on May 5, 2022 [4 favorites]


I feel kind of gross after enjoying the first few paragraphs but then learning who this guy is. The sn-risks thing feels less Python and more like the kind of 1920s Yellow Peril/Ming the Merciless laffs that Tom from The Great Gatsby would have urged Daisy to check out, "you simply have to subscribe to this man Goddard's Patron."
posted by johngoren at 3:46 AM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


"You tell them what times and days of the week you’re available. Then if they have a need, they text you a day or two beforehand and tell you where to go. You get to eat other people’s free food, drink their free alcohol, and meet a lot of cool people. Sometimes you meet the same Partyr standby guests a few times in a row and make friends with them."
Oh no, the pandemic has changed me. Partyr sounds...kind of fun actually?
posted by jeremias at 4:23 AM on May 5, 2022 [4 favorites]


Flagged with note. I don't think we should be giving Siskind and his ilk any oxygen, even if he pulls the trick of writing something endearingly witty and not obviously fascistic.
posted by acb at 7:53 AM on May 5, 2022 [4 favorites]


The speaker is one of the types you meet, though the author does not realize that.
posted by agentofselection at 8:16 AM on May 5, 2022 [10 favorites]


Oh no, the pandemic has changed me. Partyr sounds...kind of fun actually?
Sounds fun to me too.

And Corb Lund has been warning the world about the potential rise in horse-based conflict since 2007. Silicon Valley just out there stealing ideas.
posted by The_Vegetables at 8:36 AM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


Perhaps I'm not being fair, but this really irritated me and I stopped reading here, at the end of the very first paragraph. It immediately sets up the narrator as superior to everyone in the room, a keener observer, immune to the groupthink their minds all stew in.

Well yeah. The author is a eugenicist. You don't become that way if you don't think you're far above average while being incredibly self-unaware.
posted by AlSweigart at 8:40 AM on May 5, 2022 [7 favorites]


It immediately sets up the narrator as superior to everyone in the room, a keener observer, immune to the groupthink their minds all stew in.

I find loud music at parties annoying as heck because it's hard to talk to people, but the narrator is not actually that keen an observer because people seem to be able to offer entire treatises of their lives and not "hi! what's up" "what?" "hi!" "what?" So it's not that loud.
posted by The_Vegetables at 9:34 AM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


Dilbert and Scott Adam's descent into the absolute worst of not-ostensibly-religious right-wing politics makes me allergic to this sort of smartest-guy-in-the-room, everyone-is-a-moron writing, despite the occasion chuckle it produces.
posted by AlSweigart at 10:06 AM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


You're forgetting that Scott is an effective altruist and can therefore prove mathematically that his compassion is greater than that of anyone here.
His sneers are an expression of universal love we are not equipped to understand.
posted by thatwhichfalls at 11:09 AM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


My brain continues to insist on conflating Scott Adams, Scott Alexander, and Jason Alexander into a single person, which I feel is really unfair to one of the three. But it does mean that my mental picture of the two Scotts is basically George Costanza, which makes up for things a little I guess.
posted by nickmark at 11:11 AM on May 5, 2022 [6 favorites]


That was not the "sn" I was expecting. I found this quite entertaining. I also have no idea who the author is, so maybe I'm missing something that makes this uglier than it seems. I've been to this party many times. In the past, I have probably been one of the people talking at this party.

Though it's silly, I do want to go to that alternative history restaurant, aside from the nazi part. Bison mole with potatoes sounds pretty good. One of my old, terrible, hipster restaurant ideas is a chain called Haram's, where everything on the menu is forbidden in a major religion and it's organized by faith rather than type of food.
posted by eotvos at 11:19 AM on May 5, 2022 [8 favorites]


My brain continues to insist on conflating Scott Adams, Scott Alexander, and Jason Alexander into a single person, which I feel is really unfair to one of the three.

It's a simple fix - the author of the screed in the OP is named Scott Siskind. (Specifically, Scott Alexander Siskind, if you want to know how threadbare his pen name was.) He took said pen name because as a working psychiatrist, he didn't want his employers and patients knowing he was a eugenicist.
posted by NoxAeternum at 11:21 AM on May 5, 2022 [2 favorites]


Scott Alexander Siskind
After looking this guy up. . . damnit! I hate it when I discover that I've agreed with awful people. (I read the piece as snarky, self-aware humor from someone who actually enjoys such parties. Perhaps both things are true.) Thanks for the pointer.
posted by eotvos at 11:38 AM on May 5, 2022


Nate the Snake needs a warning that it's an even bigger waste of time if you don't have an American accent.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 12:22 PM on May 5, 2022 [2 favorites]


It’s definitely self-aware, but the fact that he hangs out with a bunch of Thiel-funded startup people is not at all unrelated to the reputation he has acquired.
posted by atoxyl at 12:49 PM on May 5, 2022 [2 favorites]


"House party" now means any party in a … private residence? Detached private residence? It doesn’t imply people are staying overnight?
posted by clew at 1:41 PM on May 5, 2022


"House party" now means any party in a … private residence?
Interesting. The internet agrees with you, but that's the way I've always understood it. If you stay overnight at a house party, it means something either very good or very bad has happened. Or you accidentally spent eight hours talking about the Leibniz-Clarke debates while playing very slightly naughty card game and the sun came up. But, maybe it's regional? Or, maybe I've always heard it wrong.
posted by eotvos at 2:25 PM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


> It doesn’t imply people are staying overnight?

At the risk of adding to a derail, my instinct is that a house party involving the assumption of an overnight stay is archaic or at least "dialectal" (no pejorative meant).

The note "rare" on definition 1 on Wiktionary seems to back me up; the House Party movie franchise was also a thing thirty years ago, too.

Is this a usage current in your speech community? It seems to have been more prevalent in the 19th century or at least before WWII and may show up more in print.
posted by Earthtopus at 3:15 PM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


I might well have gotten "house party" from my grandparents. I just call them "parties" mostly.

What’s the difference between a "house party" and a "party" to the modal Mefite? Or to the Silicon Valley crew?
posted by clew at 4:38 PM on May 5, 2022


One of the most SV people I know was in Seattle a few years ago and rented a furnished house for a week and out-of-towners stayed there and locals could drop in and there was a low-key schedule of making dinner together and going out dancing and show-and-tell and probably other stuff. Absolutely a house party in the old sense.

I wonder if I could find the invitation to see what she called it.
posted by clew at 5:57 PM on May 5, 2022 [1 favorite]


What’s the difference between a "house party" and a "party" to the modal Mefite?

A house party is just a party at somebody’s house, where I’m from. I guess I particularly associate it with scenarios in which identifying the location as a house seems meaningful, though, like

“so-and-so’s parents are out of town; she’s having a house party”

or

“what are you [college kids] doing tonight? Oh we’re probably just going to this house party (i.e. not a frat party, not a rave, not a some other specific kind of party)”
posted by atoxyl at 6:24 PM on May 5, 2022 [3 favorites]


I guess for the audience depicted here it might be identified as a house party instead of somebody’s company throwing a party, that kind of thing.
posted by atoxyl at 6:26 PM on May 5, 2022


Historical legacy is the old paradigm. Self-erasure is the new frontier. In the future, everyone’s everything will be imprisoned on the blockchain. You won’t strive to be remembered, you’ll strive to be forgotten. They’ll find a way to monetize it.
posted by dephlogisticated at 6:41 PM on May 5, 2022 [2 favorites]


In the future everyone will be anonymous for fifteen minutes.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 6:46 PM on May 5, 2022 [9 favorites]


If you want a similar skewering of this kind of scene/vibe that’s not written by a eugenecist assclown, you want All the Birds in the Sky by Charlie Jane Anders.
posted by ActionPopulated at 5:37 PM on May 6, 2022 [5 favorites]


Is the "alpha" thing a Siskind or Less Wrong-ism? I just saw someone on twitter use it in the same manner, but then realised they might be referencing this story.
posted by ver at 12:42 AM on May 9, 2022


https://www.investopedia.com/terms/a/alpha.asp

"Alpha (α) is a term used in investing to describe an investment strategy's ability to beat the market, or its "edge." Alpha is thus also often referred to as “excess return” or “abnormal rate of return,” which refers to the idea that markets are efficient, and so there is no way to systematically earn returns that exceed the broad market as a whole. Alpha is often used in conjunction with beta (the Greek letter β), which measures the broad market's overall volatility or risk, known as systematic market risk."
posted by Nancy Lebovitz at 3:21 AM on May 9, 2022 [1 favorite]


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