Poster's Delight
June 20, 2022 3:07 AM   Subscribe

My name is 3Fred, and I'm here to say, this the finest free thread that you'll see today

I gotta post post the th th th thread with the most
Say up jump the free thing to the FPP Thing
Where we talk freely — can you feel me?
Now rock the read thing and write freewheeling like ...

Let's rock it don't stop it (say what?)
3Fred says fee fee feel the really real thread
flying free thread make-it-be thread
freewheeling, not a retread
now GO
posted by taz (108 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
[participants not required to rap badly]
posted by taz at 3:07 AM on June 20 [4 favorites]

[participants not required to rap badly]

For some reason this is reminding me of something delightful I heard Lin-Manuel Miranda say in an interview once. He's got a reputation for being good at freestyle raps, so for a while he was getting asked to do some freestyling in the middle of interviews on things like The Today Show or whatever. He started answering those requests with "okay, I'll do it if YOU beatbox." "And so," he said in this interview, "I've been meaning to make this supercut of all these morning show hosts trying to beatbox."

(I tried to find a clip of this interview, but found something similar - he did a whole lengthy interview with Emma Watson, and asks HER to beatbox for him at one point.)
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:26 AM on June 20 [8 favorites]

Don’t mistake this for Fred3, which is on the blockchain.
posted by GenjiandProust at 3:41 AM on June 20 [2 favorites]

Or for "Undw3" which was on the blockchain but is now Not Fundamentally Trustworthy.
posted by prismatic7 at 4:34 AM on June 20 [2 favorites]

featuring MC BanHammer
posted by crocomancer at 4:59 AM on June 20 [5 favorites]

Hikaru Nakamura analyzing his own losses on YouTube right DURING the Candidates Tournament is just such a weird flex - or is he actually recharging his motivation by seeing the view numbers?

Also, the best commentary (3x twitch) so far was on Anna Cramlings twitch with her mom, former Women's World Champion Pia Cramling. They have a YouTube if you want to support. Too bad Mom Cramling is busy now doing her own matches: She's such a champ.

Pia: "Anna, you used to play this line. Do you remember what you play in this position?"
Anna: "... this?"
Pia: "No...!"
posted by flamewise at 5:10 AM on June 20 [1 favorite]

Despite being too busy and trying to curb my tendency toward micro-obsession projects, I feel compelled to try to start some sort of visual blog of the bathroom signs in cottages / homes of people with septic tanks. A quick trip out to visit my folks and some distant relatives over the weekend; three cottages, three very different approaches to flushing protocols and waste management, written in a variety of metres and rhyming schemes. No yellow/mellow/brown/down, either!
posted by Shepherd at 5:35 AM on June 20 [6 favorites]

I hope it's okay to post about this, because I really don't want to rant or talk about politics. I want to talk about grief and self-care. I'm worried about how to take care of myself when the Dobbs decision comes down, together with the concomitant civil unrest. I'm going to take it pretty much like a death in the family. The last time that happened, though, I was with a bunch of family members and we all could hold each other and weep. I know they would do that if I was with them, but I'm not and they can't. Physically, I got nobody. I'm hoping it will help that I have a lot of work to do around the apartment, plus remote volunteering for Planned Parenthood (where we never talk about the Issues; we never have to, we are busy).

The one thing I am sure about doing is staying off social media for like three days at least. Except maybe Tumblr. People are too busy being fucking weird and also from other, better countries there.

Anyway, I remember the phrase that got me through the Trump administration: "Today is not that day." Maybe tomorrow. But not today.
posted by Countess Elena at 5:45 AM on June 20 [7 favorites]

I'm still enjoying all the DALL-E 2 artwork that is being pasted on social media these past weeks, and I'll probably never get to play with the real thing but DALL-E Mini has just relaunched as and they have more servers to play with now.
posted by JoeZydeco at 6:37 AM on June 20 [4 favorites]

EmpressCallipygos , found it.

The only thing I've got is Blondie's "Rapture", which I don't remember hearing when it came out; I just this past week had reason to look it up because a character (Jensen Ackles) on the superheroes-as-sociopaths show The Boys did his version on Solid Gold. (For historical context: from Ed Piskor's Hip Hop Family Tree.)
posted by Halloween Jack at 6:41 AM on June 20 [3 favorites]

Actual conversation with our 7-year-old the other night. He had just seen a bat flying over our friend's pool.

He: I read a book about bats called "Bats"
Me: Was it about raccoons?
He: No, bats...anyway, bats hang upside down and there was a picture of them hanging upside down. I turned the book upside down so I could look at them, and they're very cute.
posted by jquinby at 6:42 AM on June 20 [11 favorites]

I'm still enjoying all the DALL-E 2 artwork
Rusted barnacle covered Teletubby at the bottom of the ocean will be good for some sleepless nights.
posted by Glinn at 6:53 AM on June 20 [5 favorites]

This intro gives me Sushi K vibes, which feels so vintage now.

Meanwhile my dumb self worked 36 hours this weekend, in my awkward scrub hat that makes me look like a background character in Chernobyl. I think patients think I have a different role because of the hat, but the role is actually 'person with haircut by neurosurgeon', which I don't need my patients asking about.
posted by cobaltnine at 6:54 AM on June 20 [7 favorites]

This morning I know I'll be smiling
at other mefites free styling.
Plating beans like a three star chef
with endless caveats
& parenthetical refs.
Riffing on posts like GZA
but on 19th century

My saturday was tight,
kyaking on
a superfund site.
Documented by Upton Sinclair,
today it just smells like
and fresh air.
Turtles and birds and trees;
picking fresh mulberries.
Sometimes you just need to settle
for exposure to
heavy metals.
posted by eotvos at 7:23 AM on June 20 [8 favorites]

This might be better in an AskMe, but it was on my mind as I woke up.
Yesterday afternoon there was a huge neighborhood gathering for a memorial service. Hundreds of people, and there's not a lot of parking around here. Not for the first time (by a long shot), someone parked blocking my driveway. This has never happened to me before moving to (semi-rural) Vermont.
Wondering if this is a local custom, or just my property. I always want to ask these people 'what do you do when someone parks in your driveway?'
I just left a note on the windshield, but I'm shocked at a number of the alternate courses of action I was considering.
posted by MtDewd at 7:26 AM on June 20 [2 favorites]

In Greece, the official steps are:

1) Lay on your horn nonstop, no matter the hour, day or night, until
2) the guilty party finally realizes, "oh shit, this is probably about that car I blocked," and
3) comes running out making hand motions like, "sorry! sorry! my bad!" and
4) moves the offending vehicle, while
5) you make angry, disgusted faces and call them a masturbator

In the U.S., I think you just shoot each other.
posted by taz at 7:56 AM on June 20 [17 favorites]

(In other, related, extreme horn instances, see also the steps for "Did you forget you called a cab, motherfucker?")
posted by taz at 8:01 AM on June 20 [2 favorites]

Metafilter: you make angry, disgusted faces and call them a masturbator
posted by jquinby at 8:03 AM on June 20 [7 favorites]

I’m glad I decided to read these posts, because now I can tell a bat joke instead of thinking sadly about [everything].

A bat is hanging upside down from the ceiling of a cave, and another bat is standing upright on the floor. Ceiling bat says, “Hey, Louise, whatcha doing?” Louise says, “Yoga!”
posted by scratch at 8:06 AM on June 20 [8 favorites]

I just ordered €100 in acrylic paint for an event I'm doing decorations for (as a volunteer). That's a whole lot of paint, in several shades of pretty. It's going to be a ton of work, and I'm very much looking forward to it all. It's so rewarding to make the pretty happen.
posted by Too-Ticky at 8:30 AM on June 20 [5 favorites]

The rap might be humorously bad, but “3Fred” as a rap star name? Inspired.
posted by notoriety public at 8:37 AM on June 20 [1 favorite]

I feel compelled to try to start some sort of visual blog of the bathroom signs in cottages / homes of people with septic tanks.

Oh it's not just me?
I'm always fascinated at the verbal contortions on these signs, as they try to get the message across without mentioning poo, pee, blood, tampons or sanitary pads.
Toilet paper is apparently acceptable to mention, as are various euphemisms like brown and yellow. Never seen anyone mentioning red, though.
posted by Zumbador at 8:42 AM on June 20 [2 favorites]

a friend of mine does bat rescue & lately has been called out for consecutively tinier baby bats, she says doing subQ fluids on them is terrifying but they're very very cute
posted by taquito sunrise at 9:02 AM on June 20 [8 favorites]

Consecutively tinier bats? Sweet. The Matryoshka Bats were my band in college, we were ahead of the times.
posted by k3ninho at 9:14 AM on June 20 [9 favorites]

Well I’m the free thread and I’m here to say
Come post in me in a funky way
posted by Going To Maine at 9:22 AM on June 20 [3 favorites]

How much does this septic tank bathroom sign writing gig pay? Because I might have few ideas. (I think I'll call my service "Flush Left")

If it's golden, bowl can hold 'em
But if it's solid don't be squalid!
In case of menses use your senses
There's the bin, just toss it in.
posted by taz at 9:29 AM on June 20 [6 favorites]

poo, pee, blood, tampons or sanitary pads.
In some countries
they simply say
throw your shit-stained paper
the hell away;
in big block letters
on the bathroom wall
and humiliate tourists
who ignore it all.

I'm not sure it really
counts as fame
but Matryoshka Bats
is an awesome name.
posted by eotvos at 9:33 AM on June 20 [3 favorites]

The oldest grandkid (7) and one of his buddies (8) had a sleepover last night. Because it is summer, because the sun literally does not go down until something like 22:30, and because they are kids, they could not sleep last night. Both sets of parents agreed summer bedtime was 21:00. Great! Got 'em in bed about 21:30. They didn't get to sleep until an hour or so later. I was so cranky and tired. This morning, the two of them were laughing their asses off while watching a Minecraft video (or playing), and it was utterly delicious to hear. That's why I left the US, to hear my grandkids belly laughing in real time. I need to remember that when it gets dark and gloomy again.

(Bats are the best. That is all.)
posted by Bella Donna at 9:48 AM on June 20 [9 favorites]

The Ageless Bat
Bats can live a long time, the longest of all mammals relative to their body size. That makes them unique models for understanding aging and the factors that contribute to a species’ life span. Telomeres, protective nucleotide repeats found on the ends of chromosomes but shorten with every cell division, are thought to play a role. For the first time, a new study examines telomere length relative to the lifespans of four bat species sampled in the wild. In the shorter-lived species, telomere length declined with age, but no such trend was observed in bats of the Myotis genus, the current age record holders. These little bats, upon genetic comparison with other mammals, have enriched expression of genes involved in telomere maintenance and DNA repair.
Lucky for them. For us, not so much.
posted by jamjam at 9:53 AM on June 20 [1 favorite]

Suppose you wake up early on this Monday off.

Suppose you get the idea to take advantage of that by heading to the nearest Lowes' garden center to get some stuff for your community garden.

Suppose the nearest Lowes' is three and a half miles away, so you decide to take a Lyft - it's just you, and you're planning on getting about 6 plants and some additional soil.

Suppose you start inside by getting the soil - you'll get the plants outside later.

Suppose the bags of soil are so heavy you have to interrupt one of the staff doing stock and ask her to help you lift two of them into your cart.

Suppose that you finally get it, and you get up to the self-check register where you scan in each bag of soil and then get ready to pay.

.....That's an awfully bad time to discover that you forgot to bring your wallet with you, wouldn't you say?
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:19 AM on June 20 [12 favorites]

Oh ouch! I would have offered a loan if I had been behind you in line. So painful. Sorry to hear it, EmpressCallipygos!
posted by Bella Donna at 10:50 AM on June 20

There’s a funny scene in Gerald Durrell’s My Family and Other Animals (I think; could be one of his others) where his sister uses a box of paper next to the loo to wipe. She later discovers it was the, um, wrong box; that is, the “used” box.
posted by scratch at 10:58 AM on June 20

Aphorism for The Times We Live In: It’s better to talk about septic issues than to talk about [everything].
posted by scratch at 10:59 AM on June 20 [1 favorite]

And bats.
posted by scratch at 10:59 AM on June 20 [1 favorite]

Inspired by EM's pandemic success with watercolors, I decided to give it another go, and this time it took. I am officially obsessed. I had the idea knocking around in my head and then my work gave me a gift card for the university bookstore and the only thing I could find that I might want was art supplies, so I got some student-grade watercolor stuff.

And that was it! YouTube tutorials, holy shit! There are so many talented people sharing their knowledge! Also, the whole watercolor space is just an extremely civilized corner of the internet. I have not read a single comment that wasn't kind and supportive. I suck, but I do believe there is some promise of ability, and regardless, I lose time doing it and feel so happy. And the whole rest of the time I am looking at the world around me with a new perspective, noticing colors and shapes and light and perspective in a way I never did before.
posted by HotToddy at 11:09 AM on June 20 [8 favorites]

Septic bats are against MLB rules.
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:09 AM on June 20 [3 favorites]

3Fred — the black sheep of the Tessier-Ashpool family.
posted by McCoy Pauley at 11:10 AM on June 20 [10 favorites]

the black sheep of the Tessier-Ashpool family.
I did have to look
though I have read the book.
It's a good joke
that I didn't note.
posted by eotvos at 11:23 AM on June 20 [1 favorite]

Stop in and stay awhile - this is bat country!
posted by jquinby at 11:43 AM on June 20 [3 favorites]

.....That's an awfully bad time to discover that you forgot to bring your wallet with you, wouldn't you say?

Yeah. I did the same thing at the grocery store about a month ago with a bunch of larger, pain-in-the-ass-to-carry items.

The cashier was lovely. As I patted myself down for my wallet for the third or fourth panicked time, she offered to set my stuff aside so I could dash home. This was a store that was reasonably close by, so that would have worked.

The lady who had been ahead of me turned around and offered to pay for me.


"Yes, I insist!"

"No! I couldn't possibly!

"Yes! I will!"

I said "I will accept if you're comfortable giving me an email address I can send an e-transfer to. If not, my answer is no, I'll just deal. All good either way."

So she wrote her email address down on my receipt, and I sent her the transfer after bagging up my groceries.

The only turd in the punchbowl was the guy behind me getting snarly about having to wait while we sorted this out (which was, in total, maybe a minute and a half of back-and-forth). There were other checkout lines open, but he decided he'd stand there and stamp his feet about strangers being nice to each other.

Anyway, a total stranger in a large city was willing to buy groceries for a forgetful goof such as myself.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 11:46 AM on June 20 [17 favorites]

Septic bats are against MLB rules.

"The Bat Sepsis Incident" sounds like it could be the title of a present-day article about something wacky that happened in the MLB in the 1970s.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 12:00 PM on June 20 [3 favorites]

beware - we may get the attention of batphomet - and that is a bad, bad thing
posted by pyramid termite at 1:51 PM on June 20 [3 favorites]

Alas, my Lowe's errand was about 9 am on a holiday Monday, and the place was largely empty. I did ask if they could do Apple Pay or Google Wallet, and the clerk's face fell; "naw, we're too old-fashioned for that." She did offer to sign me up quick for a Lowes' credit card, and I considered it - but we both realized that without my wallet, I didn't have any ID on me either, so that wouldn't have worked either. The clerk tried to cheer me up with a joke about how she was surprised the store had moved on from those old things that took the imprint of people's credit cards on carbon paper.

We unpacked my cart, and she offered to take things back to the rack so I wouldn't have to, and I went home (via another Lyft). By that time someone else in the garden had woken up and tipped me off to a much closer-to-home location for the plants I was looking for anyway, so I just got my wallet and got them closer by. The soil was for a box that I later discovered had a big hole in it anyway so it's probably fate.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 2:03 PM on June 20 [6 favorites]

if you are trying to attract bats to a bat home the secret ingredient is bat guano

you need to smear bat guano around the entrance.. years ago my mom had a bat home mounted above the shed door, it remained vacant for years then she collected some bat guano from a friend's (bat)home and rubbed a little around the entrance, we had bats every summer afterwards.

they eat a lot of mosquitoes.
posted by elkevelvet at 2:26 PM on June 20 [9 favorites]

’Cause I’m a mod, you know what I mean
I do my little turn in the cat-scan thread
Yeah, the cat-scan thread, yeah, the cat-scan thread
I show my little badge with a mod note

    — 3Right 3Said 3Fred
posted by mubba at 2:50 PM on June 20 [13 favorites]

My favorite song about bats is Vowelbat, which is not a rap, but at 2:55 or so the singer does at least as well an 'Uh' as DMX and almost as many.
posted by The_Vegetables at 2:56 PM on June 20 [1 favorite]

Bill stickers will be prosecuted.
Bill Stickers is innocent!

Fred is innocent - free Fred!
posted by inflatablekiwi at 4:02 PM on June 20 [1 favorite]

Inspired by EM's pandemic success with watercolors, I decided to give it another go, and this time it took. I am officially obsessed.

Very much the same here, HotToddy. I had a set of watercolor tubes sitting around for years and never did anything with them. I sat down one afternoon to play with them, and now I can't get enough. I've been doing abstract geometric stuff involving a lot of pen and ink work and it's amazing how profoundly I'll be transported while working on them. It's an incredibly fun medium.
posted by MrVisible at 4:07 PM on June 20 [4 favorites]

We took our Sunday car away for the weekend last week and had a wonderful time cruising with like-minded cars around the mountains of the Sunshine Coast, plus some cruising around the block shenanigans on Friday night while we all acted like we were still 18 and tyres are cheap.

The car bore it all well until almost right at the end of our longest drive in it when the transmission decided it would no longer transmit (about 3km from home, fortunately). It seems to be OK now it's all cooled down, but professional advice is imminent and I'm hoping it's not terrible news.
posted by dg at 4:30 PM on June 20 [1 favorite]

checked my socials & my bat rescue friend is now caring for a pregnant bat, which is basically a matroshka bat, you all called it
posted by taquito sunrise at 4:50 PM on June 20 [10 favorites]

Much like tribbles....
posted by hippybear at 4:56 PM on June 20 [2 favorites]

I'm worried about the bats that live under our eaves. The neighbour's twin grey cats have been studying them and identified their home. I think the bats may already be gone. Not much I can do about the cats.
They do what they want.
Once or twice I've come home to find my rats cowering at the back of their cage and refusing to come climb down to eat their supper which is *highly* unusual. I think those cats sneak in here.
I love cats but man, some of them are killing machines.

The talk about water colours is so lovely.
I did a drawing again for the first time in a very long time. My father asked me to design a cover for the book he's just finished writing.
It's about the Amnesty process here in South Africa. It's a big deal for me that he asked me to do the cover.
I'm showing him the first draft today and am a bit nervous!
He said he wanted something that suggested tributaries and the complexity of following all the research threads and piecing together the story.
I did a sort of underground root system overlaid with a maze. We'll see if he likes it.
posted by Zumbador at 8:27 PM on June 20 [6 favorites]

I just got the Tiny Monster's covid shot appointment!

Now I just have to wallow in anxiety over whether I should've gone for Moderna instead of Pfizer. I went with the one his pediatrician ordered, but I wish they had both.
posted by The Monster at the End of this Thread at 5:56 AM on June 21 [3 favorites]

I have eaten
the plums
that I brought
to work.

And which
I was apparently
for no reason.

I regret it.
They were
so soft
and so old.

(Literally true this morning. And perhaps also true in other ways.)
posted by eotvos at 6:38 AM on June 21 [6 favorites]

we name all our local bats Nandor.
posted by djseafood at 7:05 AM on June 21 [5 favorites]

Bat question: do they chase away rats?....

The community garden is next to a restaurant, and last year there was an uptick in rats when everyone in the city started doing outdoor dining as a Covid thing. (That's why I probably got a plot in the first place, about half the members quit last year between people moving out of the city and people getting spooked by all the rats.) The restaurant foot the bill for an exterminator for us, there are copious baits and traps around the place, and there's been some major "come help with the upkeep" work projects consisting of piling decorative gravel on top of the spots where we've seen holes.

It's apparently way better this year than last, but rats are still out there somewhere, so...I mean, we're on another drive to try to attract more bees, butterflies, and birds, maybe we can add bats to the list?
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:16 AM on June 21 [1 favorite]

I have a longstanding theory that Tuesdays are the worst day of the week, and today is not offering any data to contest that theory.
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 7:55 AM on June 21 [1 favorite]

There are, in my experience, very few things that can match, for sheer luxury, a hot shower on returning from an admittedly brief but properly total naked immersion in the rain-swelled, mist-adorned Tambo River on the moonless, windless, Milky Way lit solar midnight of the winter solstice.

I am very content right now.
posted by flabdablet at 8:05 AM on June 21 [7 favorites]

I went out the back gate to the alley, taking out the rolling trash cans this morning. There are many, many, cats in our 'hood. Suddenly I noticed a squirrel, on the powerpole. This is the first sighting of such a thing, because cats. It was playing on the pole, and teasing two cats of my neighbors, and the cats were looking on. Squirrel was going by, (I mean 2-3 inches one of the cats,) and it led me to think, all three are pets of the same household. The squirrel was joyous, which enabled me to be the same way! The apartment is over a garage and has a high side porch, and a tall fence. Anyway I will take a camera tomorrow.
posted by Oyéah at 8:46 AM on June 21 [1 favorite]

I went on my first covidcation(?) this weekend, which was the same location as my last pre-pandemic vacation: visiting a friend in a beach town a few hours away. Another friend from England was visiting at the same time, so we all met up and hung out. There was a bit of drama that went on, but it resolved, and otherwise I saw redwoods and beach and went shopping a bit and nobody got sick, so huzzah there.
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:05 AM on June 21 [4 favorites]

We get bats around here in late summer. I see them flying around at twilight. We tend to keep our patio door open all summer and so we get a bat flying around in the house once every year or two. Our cats, when they were young enough to be able to get up on our roof, would occasionally catch a bat and bring it into the house. The first time this happened I called our veternarian who said our vaccinations were up to date but don't worry, there's no rabies in the bats in our area. The next day there was an article in the newspaper about rabies in a local bat. It was months later that we learned that was found in a bat collected by one of our neighbors.

A couple of years ago Alastair Reynolds on his blog (or maybe Twitter) talked about using a bat detector so I bought this one. I've tried it a few times but have yet to detect a bat with it.
posted by neuron at 10:19 AM on June 21 [2 favorites]

When we used to stay with my Grandmother-in-Law in Germany we would get bats coming and going all the time. If we left the upstairs windows open on both sides of the house they would circle through all night long.

After a while they built a nest in one of the rolladen housings and we were about to evict them, and then learned they are protected and if you leave them alone you get this cool plaque (translation: bat-friendly home) from the state government to hang on your house.

Oma is gone now, but we kept the plaque. I still need to hang it on our home.
posted by JoeZydeco at 10:44 AM on June 21 [6 favorites]

Just in case no one mentioned this Jonny Sun tweet from last year, I think I need to quote this:

young man
there's no need to feel glum
I said, young man
so I ate all the plums
in the, icebox
sorry for what I've done
they were so! cold! and! de-lic-ious!
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:44 AM on June 21 [4 favorites]

If we left the upstairs windows open on both sides of the house they would circle through all night long.

Having grown up in the biting-and-stinging-insect-abundant environment of the southeastern US, I can't imagine not having screens on the windows. But bats flying through the room at night sounds pretty cool (though my bat-phobic sister might not agree).
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:25 PM on June 21 [1 favorite]

on the murderousness of cats

we've been sharing the home with a pomeranian, he is aggressive and not house-trained and yappy. I do my best but in my heart of hearts he just does not fill me with song, if you get my drift

the cat hates him, cat has beat the hell out of pomeranian a couple of times and people get upset and the cat gets put out on the deck. for me that cat is a fucking champ, and he gets my lap anytime he wants

what is the use of a pomeranian? raise a ruckus if "the help" gets too close to the baubles? ffs
posted by elkevelvet at 1:37 PM on June 21 [7 favorites]

I can't imagine not having screens on the windows

That was one of the weirdest things to me about moving to the UK. NONE OF THE WINDOWS HAVE SCREENS. Things can just, like, fly into your house if they feel like it when the weather's warm. Fortunately it's only summer here from 2:35 PM to about 3:48 on one day in mid-July. :P
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 2:26 PM on June 21 [5 favorites]

young man
there's no need to feel glum
I said, young man
so I ate all the plums
in the, icebox
sorry for what I've done
they were so! cold! and! de-lic-ious!

Well I’m a plum eater and I’m here to say
please forgive me in a funky way
posted by Going To Maine at 3:15 PM on June 21 [3 favorites]

So, in Santiago, Chile, we don't have screens on windows. It's a very dry climate and getting drier, and the summers have always been bone dry, so not a lot of bugs.
I left the house to go teach a class a few weeks ago and forgot my wallet and my house keys. Fortunately, I have my credit and debit cards on my phone, so in order to forget them, I'd have to forget my phone, which isn't likely to happen. It's especially convenient when I go on long biking excursions, I don't have to bring a wallet just to be able to buy stuff if I feel like it.
posted by signal at 4:03 PM on June 21 [1 favorite]

what is the use of a pomeranian?

They were developed (with strong contributions by Queen Charlotte and Queen Victoria) as companion animals which are known to be calming and to decrease the effects of depression and anxiety.
posted by Mitheral at 4:31 PM on June 21 [1 favorite]

what is the use of a pomeranian?

I once knew a Pomeranian who was clever, charming, affectionate, and discrete. Her only fault was that she hated big dogs, so, if you were walking her, she would yell at the mastiff across the street, and he would look so upset and ashamed, like he was saying “Geeze, lady, I’m just walking here.”

I still miss her, 20 years later.
posted by GenjiandProust at 6:06 PM on June 21 [4 favorites]

Well, the professional advice is in and or poor car no longer has a transmission, having been given a very poor diagnosis. Torque converter and transmission both require a full rebuild and, worst case depending on how much damage has been done to parts, is around $3-3.5k to repair and replace :-(. Buy a cool old car they said, it'll be fun they said :-(.
posted by dg at 6:07 PM on June 21 [3 favorites]

Buy a cool old car they said, it'll be fun they said
Caveat: Don't buy an old automatic.
posted by HiroProtagonist at 6:38 PM on June 21

Went for a walk yesterday at sunset. Was drizzling and cold.
A cat I don't know was sheltering under a parked car. When he saw me, he said "meep!" and emerged. Every hair of him proclaiming how much he disapproved of the rain.
We meeped at one another for a bit, (he never made eye contact, which I found intriguing ) Then I guess he decided that I showed promise because he said "quack" and walked towards a gate in a very determined manner.

I got the message and knocked on the gate for him. Cat allowed me to pick him up but was clearly not into it so I put him down.
After a bit, a man came to open the gate with that slightly aggressive air of one expecting a beggar or a sales person.
We stared at one another. I pointed at the cat, who was slipping inside without so much as a backwards glance at me.
Then the gate was closed.

No words necessary.
posted by Zumbador at 10:15 PM on June 21 [5 favorites]

Caveat: Don't buy an old automatic.
Wouldn't be so bad if the transmission didn't need to be able to cope with 650hp. Old automatics are fine, but old cars with high-performance parts are gonna hurt your pockets one way or another.
posted by dg at 11:04 PM on June 21

As I've mentioned a fair few times in various posts, I live in a community on an island in southeast Alaska. The terrain in this part of the world is quite steep and I live in a historic part of the old part of town where a number of city "streets" are not paved roads, as one might expect, but shared staircases and wooden boardwalks that provide access to parts of the hillside that are impractical to reach via car. My home is on one of these boardwalk and staircase streets, and returning home from my evening walk I encountered not one, not two, but three bears on the stairs - a new record for me.

Every time before when I have encountered a neighborhood bear the bear has quickly retreated but this time two of the bears seemed to be considering conflict as an option, which is not a good sign of things to come this summer. I think they were two mostly grown cubs and a mother and that's bad, too -- you don't know what a sow will do when her cubs are around.

On the bright side, while they dragged one bag of trash off into the woods, they dropped a second bag and that bag contained an Amazon mailer in the refuse so now at least we know who is the jackass leaving unsecured trash around.

Bear tax - sorry for the graininess, I only had my phone and it was post-dusk and rainy. Also, only one bear in the photo..
posted by Nerd of the North at 11:06 PM on June 21 [6 favorites]

or poor car no longer has a transmission, having been given a very poor diagnosis

Ms flabdablet's Subaru Forester no longer has an engine, the timing belt housing having done a fairly convincing impression of John Hurt's chest from Alien.
posted by flabdablet at 4:54 AM on June 22 [1 favorite]

My diplomacy, my security, my hope and my plums.
My tomorrow and their temperature, my lips and my selfishness.
My spouse, my function, my lawlessness, my charm.
My hunger, my refusal, my produce, and my vodka.
My records, my smile, and my plums
My reflection, my eyelid, my fragility, my produce
My hair, my austerity, my tattoo, my fruit
My fooling and my terror, my problems and my prunus.
posted by eotvos at 7:33 AM on June 22

...And if you've ever had a problem with your prunus, you know how painful that can be!
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:01 AM on June 22 [2 favorites]

the timing belt housing having done a fairly convincing impression of John Hurt's chest from Alien.
Ouch. I hope that hasn't resulted in mechanical realignment of any internal components!
posted by dg at 4:46 PM on June 22

You can hear fireworks in the distance. It means that drugs have arrived at one of the slums in our vicinity.
posted by signal at 8:26 PM on June 22

In our neighborhood, we know when one of the local network router names gets changed to "oh wow."

(not really, I just made that up, but I like my imaginary local drug scene)
posted by taz at 10:45 PM on June 22 [2 favorites]

I hope that hasn't resulted in mechanical realignment of any internal components

Considering that the starter now spins with no apparent resistance whatsoever, I expect most of the internal components are now well beyond realignment :-(

Ms flabdablet has decided not to fix it. Instead, we're bringing forward the promised buying of a much newer car for little ms flabdablet in a price range that make my eyes water every time I contemplate it.

Personally I have only ever owned well-maintained beaters, and the falling-over-themselves eagerness of almost everybody else to spend at least five times as much as me on personal transport is yet another thing I've got filed under You Think Cats Are Weird, Have You Met People?
posted by flabdablet at 11:08 PM on June 22

Oh, that's a very bad sign indeed :-( If you think people are weird spending large amounts on personal transport, I own a car that I can legally only drive on the road during (or to/from) formally sanctioned events held and published by a recognised car club or similar organisation or to/from repair.

I'm not aware of any associated drug scene or secret codes regarding such, but pretty much everyone involved in classic cars is either selling drugs as the only way they can afford it or are way too poor for drugs.
posted by dg at 11:35 PM on June 22 [1 favorite]

Okay, real talk - what is with all the posts about potatoes lately? Was there some memo that went out that I missed somehow?
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:52 AM on June 23 [4 favorites]

Potato diet community trial | Hacker News

Not sure this is the reason or a coincidence. Potatoes were on the morning news today and I was also "WTF potatoes".

There mush be some memo/meme out there somewhere. I'm also overly curious and now thinking about getting a bag of potatoes.
posted by zengargoyle at 10:17 AM on June 23

Random story. My neighbor used to peel and eat potatoes raw like an apple as a snack.
posted by zengargoyle at 10:19 AM on June 23 [1 favorite]

I have also been wondering on the potato thing and finally just asked in MetaTalk.
posted by jenfullmoon at 10:31 AM on June 23

So after 2+ months of waiting, I've finally gained access to DALL-E 2!!! That's the incredible new AI image generation system featured in this April post. It's like magic: type in a description of anything you can imagine, and in ~20 seconds it produces half a dozen coherent, creative, high-resolution images in any style you want. Paintings, drawings, sculptures, photorealism, digital art, this thing doesn't break a sweat! You can also upload a picture to create similar-looking variations, or edit whatever you want into it through simple text description.

If you're interested, keep an eye on MetaTalk -- I'll post a thread tomorrow afternoon (CST) where I'll fulfill up to 50 image generation requests!
posted by Rhaomi at 11:23 AM on June 23 [9 favorites]

You can hear fireworks in the distance. It means that drugs have arrived
Living in that world could be fun. Certainly surprising. I rather suspect cellphones and ShotSpotter mean that's unlikely to be true, at least here.

When I want to announce that the boat has come in, I put some rope through the severed feet of a real estate agent and throw them over a telephone wire.
posted by eotvos at 11:47 AM on June 23 [2 favorites]

Fireworks here in Los Angeles can be for anything. World cup, holiday, whatever. There's always that illegal thing, but I'd bet this July 4th there will still be lots of fireworks going off all over the place. And good one's at that. Sometimes the show outside the door is better than the one you would get going to the July 4th legal display somewhere.

(I sorta made my own fireworks as a kid, amazing what you can learn from books.)
posted by zengargoyle at 12:51 PM on June 23

I understand nothing about the potato flurry. I rather hope it actually has no explanation. Praise Yam! (Who must have been vacationing in west coast South America when they introduced the potato to mankind.)
posted by eotvos at 1:19 PM on June 23

"You're always going to be alright if you've got your potato."
posted by k3ninho at 2:00 PM on June 23 [2 favorites]

I understand nothing about the potato flurry.

It did happen all of a spudden, from a spectater's point of view.

mmmm, potato flurry....
posted by Greg_Ace at 2:33 PM on June 23 [2 favorites]

You can't get a potato McFlurry, though. The machine is always broken.
posted by hippybear at 3:03 PM on June 23 [2 favorites]

I think I gained 10 lbs just from reading Metafilter this week.
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:50 PM on June 23 [1 favorite]

I found a new therapist.
After going through a list of people recommended by others that couldn't help me, I decided to take a chance on the last one on the list and it looks like I really the jackpot.
I wasn't even trying to find a therapist who was a good cultural fit as it never occurred to me that such a person exists.
This guy is an Afrikaans trans man, who immediately picked up on the neurodivergent aspects of my situation, understands Afrikaans family dinamics without me having to spell things out.
I mean, I used to just ignore the "find a therapist who is a cultural match" advice as I didn't think such a thing existed.
Also, I can swear without feeling self conscious, which was definitely not a thing with my previous therapist.
posted by Zumbador at 9:09 PM on June 23 [4 favorites]

paddled in a two person sit-upon kayak in a bay among marshy wetlands with little lurk, and later in canoe with little lurk and mother, significantly harder. i think due to the draft and wind-catching profile more than to mother. i kid: mama paddles well; little lurk was better with kayak than canoe paddle.
rode bikes and stood, ever so briefly (although several times), in a very cold ocean with little lurk. (it wasn't the cold ocean, itself, that strictly limited the dips but the windy and not warm weather, preventing warming up between chill immersions or after).
heard and appreciated dawn chorus & saw dawn. (also fantastic arrays of stars in moonless sky -- one forgets how many stars are up there beyond the local lights!).
marveled at ghost crab antics (somehow they reminded me of those sesame street aliens who try to talk to the cow and the telephone: yup yup yupyupyupyupyupyup).
and yes, a sweet potato and something described as a japanese sweet potato (which wasn't as orange or as soft, but somewhat more solid) were wrapped in foil and left in the fire and were very good the next day.
i did holler "what the fuck!?!?" in the direction of another driver in the presence of the kid. moderately mortified a moment, but it's probably about my turn. kid did not seem to notice ... or is already familiar with that sort of expression in that sort of situation. at home garden grows,
surviving sunflowers high enough i need to remove or reconfigure protective netting,
indoor plants didn't die. most of the (still not enough) corn has tassles and several have hair;
some squash expand, tomatoes flower, bushbeans flop about & potatoes sprawl.
kale struggles, peppers are slow.
posted by 20 year lurk at 10:32 PM on June 23 [3 favorites]

Heading out for a camping trip this morning. It's a bit of a drive, 4 hours or so, but it's going to be a great event with people coming in from all over for a couple of days of forest fun. Temp forecasts went from being lower 60s to upper 80s over the past few days, so packing plans have had to be changed. Looking forward to this!
posted by hippybear at 5:44 AM on June 24 [1 favorite]

eotvos: "Living in that world could be fun. Certainly surprising. I rather suspect cellphones and ShotSpotter mean that's unlikely to be true,"

It's no fun for the people who live in the drug-gang overtaken slums. Not sure what ShotSpotter is, but there are more cellphones than people here.
posted by signal at 6:39 AM on June 24

My apologies, signal. I don't want to make light of real violence. I assumed you were making a joke about exaggerated rumors. Sorry. (ShotSpotter is an expensive automated gunshot triangulation system that is incredibly imprecise. It has lead to violent police responses to kids setting off fireworks in the past.)
posted by eotvos at 9:01 AM on June 24

That's ok, we're cool. [fist bump]
posted by signal at 9:18 AM on June 24 [1 favorite]

If you're interested, keep an eye on MetaTalk -- I'll post a thread tomorrow afternoon (CST) where I'll fulfill up to 50 image generation requests!

Note: I'm postponing this in light of today's horrible Court news; it doesn't feel right to run a light/fun thing like this when so many people are reeling and in pain. Maybe next week; in the meantime, support your local funds if you can.
posted by Rhaomi at 12:48 PM on June 24 [2 favorites]

Metafilter: an agglomeration of tropes. I saw this catchphrase and herded it over here. I saw the author used the word trope, one more time in their piece about working in a chicken shop, and cocaine use. Where I live, I have no idea what people are up to, but all the busts seem to be fentanyl and meth in mass quantities, and weapons in the care of felons on parole; followed by acres of pot. I never hear about cocaine, that must be for the big boys and girls, the Petroleum Clubbers.
posted by Oyéah at 2:44 PM on June 25

I got an email from the Harvard Law case against the US Department of Education, it seems to state my student loans will be forgiven. Oh Yeah, it is the Sweet Vs Cordona case. It looks like there is 6 bil available to pay off loans of some 240,000 folks, and a long list of colleges and universities that are part of it, not just one or two. It looks like you can still apply to the Department of Education for forgiveness.
posted by Oyéah at 3:37 PM on June 26 [1 favorite]

Okay. the campout was amazing. Was really more glamping than camping. Amazing people, amazing setting, amazing all around. Furries are some of the best people, truly.
posted by hippybear at 5:26 PM on June 26 [1 favorite]

noites cariocas
posted by pyramid termite at 7:18 PM on June 28

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