beef beef beef
November 13, 2022 4:44 PM   Subscribe

"one time in college a professor spent 90 minutes talking about an example scenario that involved beef and i thought nothing of it until several weeks later when i found out that my classmate had made a minute long compilation of all 125 times he said "beef" in one lecture"
posted by brundlefly (67 comments total) 30 users marked this as a favorite
 
Someone send this to Benjamin Partridge.
posted by kickingtheground at 4:47 PM on November 13, 2022 [3 favorites]


Helluva way to settle a beef.

A+
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 4:49 PM on November 13, 2022 [1 favorite]


I wonder if he's seen this related work by Doug Zongker: Paper [pdf], Presentation [yt]
posted by aubilenon at 4:51 PM on November 13, 2022 [9 favorites]


Where's the ... ? Oh. There it is.
posted by credulous at 4:55 PM on November 13, 2022 [11 favorites]


I did this in 2000 to a ~30 minute home video of my girlfriend's sister talking about her day at school, extracting just the word "like". It was also about a minute long.
posted by dmd at 5:13 PM on November 13, 2022 [2 favorites]


Freshman high school geography class. Teacher said “um” a lot. One day while talking and walking around the class, he must have noticed a lot of the students were tallying something with marks on their note papers. He stopped talking, picked up somebody’s sheet, and asked them what they were counting. “Your ‘ums’,” they replied. He went ballistic.
posted by njohnson23 at 5:15 PM on November 13, 2022 [9 favorites]


But where is the beef?
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:16 PM on November 13, 2022


As a professor, I immediately was thinking back to when I might have said "beef" over and over again in my computer science classes while waiting, horrified, for the video to load.
posted by procrastination at 5:19 PM on November 13, 2022 [12 favorites]


*sigh* If only this ended up being what Twitter was for....
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:25 PM on November 13, 2022 [7 favorites]


And I just thought of a more pleasant thing to say:

Some years ago New York City took part in the public art Cow Parade event, where they handed out a bunch of plain cow statues to different artists to customize and then posted the resulting sculptures throughout the city. Not everyone had heard about it, though - they just suddenly saw all these cow statues pop up all over the place, and were a little confused.

A cabbie I had one morning (someone with a shakey grasp of English) was one such confused person. And so about midway through my ride, he cautiously asked if I knew why "this week, everywhere I drive, I see beefs!"

I explained as best I could, but "everywhere I go, I see beefs" has been an expression I have been happy to have stuck in my head ever since. I hope that cabbie has been enjoying a long and happy life ever since.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:34 PM on November 13, 2022 [32 favorites]


The punch line was, when the teacher fined one kid, 50,000 "I will not talk in class," we, the class, collectively had them and he went right up, and handed them in. Mr. Lehman's screw up seventh grade, science class, overseas. It was a shining moment in time.
posted by Oyéah at 5:43 PM on November 13, 2022 [5 favorites]


This is the kind of content I really appreciate, thank you. (beef)
posted by tiny frying pan at 5:47 PM on November 13, 2022


When my sister and I were young teens, yet mom wasn't quite ready to leave us at home alone, we'd have to go along with her on weekly grocery store trips. The one concession we eventually won from her was being able to stay in the car in the parking lot (this was the 70's when that was still considered a safe thing to do as long as the doors were locked) while she shopped. So we hung out there, watched people, chatted, and amused ourselves. One of our favorite things was to repeat some random word until it became a meaningless/funny sound.

Whoever made that video surely must have played that game, because that was hilarious!

5-4-3-2-1-beef
posted by Greg_Ace at 6:01 PM on November 13, 2022 [3 favorites]


There's a supercut of all of the uses of the word "cocksucker" in DEADWOOD and it's about 7 minutes long. Amazing.
posted by brundlefly at 6:06 PM on November 13, 2022 [6 favorites]


beef
posted by NedKoppel at 6:09 PM on November 13, 2022


Semantic Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation Satiation
posted by lalochezia at 6:21 PM on November 13, 2022 [5 favorites]


Saichee-ayshin!
posted by Greg_Ace at 6:26 PM on November 13, 2022


Bieph.
posted by Greg_Ace at 6:26 PM on November 13, 2022 [2 favorites]


Thanks a million!
posted by mono blanco at 6:30 PM on November 13, 2022


Beff.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:32 PM on November 13, 2022


fuck it
posted by Insert Clever Name Here at 6:47 PM on November 13, 2022 [1 favorite]


He stopped talking, picked up somebody’s sheet, and asked them what they were counting. “Your ‘ums’,” they replied.

I use a bosun's call (you know, the comm signal on the Enterprise) to bring my class to attention. I do it with my voice, not a whistle.

A while ago I had a student in my class with perfect pitch. At the end of the term, he presented me with a chart of every pitch my starting note landed on (it turns out to vary within a range of a minor third or so).

A couple years later, I taught his younger brother, who made the exact same chart.
posted by aws17576 at 6:48 PM on November 13, 2022 [38 favorites]


ha ha it's very funny i don't at all have deep existential terror that my undergrads have something even worse about me
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 7:03 PM on November 13, 2022 [18 favorites]


what
posted by Tandem Affinity at 7:41 PM on November 13, 2022


"nothing but beef" keeps cracking me up
posted by deludingmyself at 7:51 PM on November 13, 2022 [3 favorites]


"Alrighty then, picture this, if you will
10 to 2 a.m., X, Yogi DMT and a box of Krispy Kremes
In my need-to-know post just outside of Area 51
Contemplating the whole "Chosen People" thingy
When just a flaming stealth banana split the sky
Like one would hope, but never really expect to see in a place like this
Cutting right angle donuts on a dime
And stopping right on my Birkenstocks, and me yelping"

What's the Beef
posted by clavdivs at 7:54 PM on November 13, 2022


Dude!
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:56 PM on November 13, 2022


Genre
posted by chococat at 8:02 PM on November 13, 2022 [1 favorite]


This rules.

Reminds me of one time at a job, we had a training thing and the presenter kept saying “it’s one of those things.” It seemed like he would start and end every sentence with it, and sometimes put one in the middle too. Like: “So, it’s one of those things, you’re in situation, when occurrence occurs, it‘s one of those things, then you need to do process, it’s one of those things. And, it’s one of those things…” I could barely keep it together, and when we got out I immediately started making cracks and NO ONE GOT IT. No one else noticed! I felt like I was losing my mind.

Beef.
posted by rodlymight at 8:27 PM on November 13, 2022 [5 favorites]


beef
posted by brainwane at 8:45 PM on November 13, 2022


My college statistics professor's verbal filler word was "ok". He was very loose with his verbal filler word. Sample dialog: "Let's say you had a set of numbers, ok. 7 ok. 9 ok. 11 ok. 10 ok. 14 ok. And you wanted to get the average, ok." And so on.

Once you noticed the patterned it was maddening, ok.
posted by mmascolino at 8:48 PM on November 13, 2022 [3 favorites]




mushroom MUSHROOM
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:41 PM on November 13, 2022 [9 favorites]


don't forget to stick around for soup
posted by DoctorFedora at 11:04 PM on November 13, 2022


Buffalo bison, that other Buffalo bison bully, also bully Buffalo bison.
posted by aniola at 11:29 PM on November 13, 2022 [1 favorite]


Jeff on Jeopardy!
posted by Pronoiac at 11:45 PM on November 13, 2022 [2 favorites]


kickingtheground, “the new Michael Banyan experimental spoken word project is wonderful”, says a guy!
posted by wjt at 11:56 PM on November 13, 2022


Once you noticed the patterned it was maddening, ok.

One of my lecturers back in university did this, okay? but it was always a question like he was checking you were with him still, okay? except he didn't stop and it was a 400 person lecture, okay? so nobody who didn't get it would stop the flow anyway, okay?

So the guy in front of me, okay? he started tallying the okays, okay? but he gave up before the one hour lecture, okay? was over, because he'd filled his entire A4 sheet with tally marks (okay?)
posted by Dysk at 12:02 AM on November 14, 2022 [5 favorites]


The timing of the edits is exquisite!
posted by neonamber at 12:32 AM on November 14, 2022


Honestly, as a prof, I hate this so much. I am already super aware of my verbal tics thanks to video lecturing (right, I say right all the time, right?) and given how horrible and stressful our jobs are at this specific moment (hello strike action in the UK) I would be unable to parse one of my class doing something like this as anything other than bullying. I don't have the bandwidth to see this as cute or funny in any way & this sort of thing - manipulating and editing lecture footage without consent & then sharing it - is one of the big reasons a lot of colleagues straight up refuse to do or allow lecture recordings. I hope this professor never ever sees this and that people stop sharing it.
posted by AFII at 12:55 AM on November 14, 2022 [11 favorites]


“Beef” isn’t a filler word, though. It’s the topic of the lecture. I don’t think we can conclude that this was mean-spirited without hearing the whole lecture.
posted by Comet Bug at 1:18 AM on November 14, 2022 [14 favorites]


To be clear, I'm not saying it was meant as mean spirited, I am saying that I, personally, would be hurt and horrified by it, regardless of initial intent. Until I see evidence that this prof gave permission for their stuff to be manipulated and used in this way, it feel gross and invasive to watch it, and evidence of the sort of abuse profs open themselves up to when they allow recordings to be made. In this instance maybe it was intended as 'a bit of fun', but it isn't always, and celebrating it feels deeply problematic. Students recording things that their profs say in class and putting them on the internet is not a neutral act.
posted by AFII at 1:59 AM on November 14, 2022 [7 favorites]


“Beef” isn’t a filler word, though. It’s the topic of the lecture. I don’t think we can conclude that this was mean-spirited without hearing the whole lecture.

Still, if they have time to tally the verbal ticks, they can't be paying attention to the content. At the very least, you have to conclude that they are bored by the subject. That's always going to be disheartening for a teacher.

That said, you can't just take that too personally. Lots of people take classes purely for the credits, of course some of them are going to be bored.
posted by sohalt at 4:01 AM on November 14, 2022 [1 favorite]


What? They could have been delighted by the subject. I think that's seeing darkness where the rest of us are celebrating light. This kind of thing is for joy, for happiness. I see no ill intent. (beef)
posted by tiny frying pan at 5:25 AM on November 14, 2022 [4 favorites]


I think it's important to note that if you go to the youtube version of this video, you can view the automatically-generated transcript.
so they can produce peppers or will suppose they can produce beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef the opportunity cost to beef beef beef beef beef beef be the value of beef beef beef beef beef five four three two one beef beef PPP three beef beef beef to get one more beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef and remeasuring the sacrifice of beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef and therefore I get one beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef nothing but the three-piece be beef beef beef beef beef does more beef in the world PC fries beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef is beef beef beef beef beef beef the relative price of beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef beef and put them in the beef beef beef
That also makes it pretty great to watch the video with captions turned on.
posted by moonmilk at 5:51 AM on November 14, 2022 [15 favorites]


This seems pretty harmless, all things considered. A tweet mentioning the professor's reaction may be helpful here. The beefconomist was, I would hazard a guess, saying "beef" an appropriate number of times for this lecture.
posted by cupcakeninja at 5:52 AM on November 14, 2022 [5 favorites]


In the comments the poster says the prof liked it so much that he shows it to subsequent classes every year.
posted by showbiz_liz at 5:54 AM on November 14, 2022 [11 favorites]


This isn't one of those lazy automated "just cut together all the instances of word 'beef'" supercuts. This is skillful editing, arranging the differently pitched beefs to a natural-conversational-sounding melody, tossing just the right number of other non-beef words and phrases in. at just the right places for surprise and joy.

If you watch only one beefy supercut today, make it this one
posted by ook at 7:26 AM on November 14, 2022 [12 favorites]


Here's the original post from 2019. As they say, beef jokes are a rare medium well done.
posted by now i'm piste at 7:31 AM on November 14, 2022 [11 favorites]


Honestly, as a prof, I hate this so much.

Based only on that clip, the prof seems like a very good lecturer.
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 7:38 AM on November 14, 2022


Without really considering the consequences, I said "beef beef beef beef beef" out loud and my dog came running.
posted by moonmilk at 7:48 AM on November 14, 2022 [6 favorites]


don't grief my beef or you'll need relief

smock smock smock
posted by lazaruslong at 8:26 AM on November 14, 2022 [2 favorites]


50 years of "What are you doing here?"
posted by JDC8 at 8:53 AM on November 14, 2022


I find this awesome (truly A+ editing and now I want to learn about the opportunity cost of beef, to be honest) and, similar to AFII, find the idea of a super cut edit of a recording of one of my classes terrifying. Some of the examples in this thread of counting filler words give me unhappy flashbacks to a friend hassling me for how many times I said "um" in a public presentation and pointing out how I stand like I desperately need to pee (I think it was bashfulness/nervous body language).

I think at this point, a super cut of all the faces I make over Zoom would make me cringe more than my verbal tics. i watched a history professor give a book talk (in person) recently and thought to myself "they have a very mobile face, it feels like they are exaggerating their facial expressions like they are on a kids tv show, oh wait, I totally do this kind of over-the-top facial emotiveness as a result of virtual classes because I don't have body language available to me except suddenly leaning forward into the camera."
posted by spamandkimchi at 9:07 AM on November 14, 2022 [4 favorites]


teaching economist here (although I'm not sure who the person lecturing is; I put out the word on econ twitter but didn't get any bites). It seems like this a lecture about production possibilities frontiers, opportunity cost, and the gains from trade -- a sort of classic, usually early-in-the-term introductory model (slides look like it's from intro macro, if I'm reading them correctly). So, two goods, thinking about the tradeoffs of producing one versus the other and the sort of Ricardian argument for trade. (might as well be "guns" and "butter" instead of beef and peppers -- I think we used pizza and beer when I was an undergrad). Seems like he carried that example through all of the topics. Hence, beef. So it's not really a lecture about beef and not a verbal tic or just "couldn't think of another example in the moment."

Pretty funny though.
posted by dismas at 9:31 AM on November 14, 2022 [1 favorite]


Could we have the "guns and butter" version set to a mid-90s industrial track please?
posted by mittens at 9:46 AM on November 14, 2022 [1 favorite]


This reminds me of taking a hip-hop class years ago and I started counting every time the guy said "aight." Like 14 times a class or so.
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:59 AM on November 14, 2022


One of my lecturers back in university did this, okay? but it was always a question like he was checking you were with him still, okay? except he didn't stop and it was a 400 person lecture, okay? so nobody who didn't get it would stop the flow anyway, okay

Ugh my 11th grade trigonometry teacher was the same, except her tick was “what.” It was maddening, and certainly one of the reasons why I only scraped out a C in that class. I counted 37 whats in the first ~20 min of a class once, at which point I gave up counting.
posted by DiscourseMarker at 10:20 AM on November 14, 2022


My manager's verbal tic is repeating someone's name at least once per sentence when he'd talking to them. I think it might be deliberate, in order to make you feel included? (Or maybe to remind himself who he's talking to, since we're all WFH and communicating via non-video calls.) But it's very distracting.
posted by Greg_Ace at 10:28 AM on November 14, 2022


Could we have the "guns and butter" version set to a mid-90s industrial track please?

next time I do it it'll be badgers and mushrooms
posted by dismas at 10:32 AM on November 14, 2022 [2 favorites]


This totally wasn't a verbal tic though. It was BEEF (beef)
posted by tiny frying pan at 10:45 AM on November 14, 2022 [1 favorite]


Unlike counting verbal tics, this isn't making fun of the professor. It's a joke about how the particular lecture was funny because it involved saying the word "beef" a lot. (Also there's not the same implication that people were counting beefs instead of listening—this is all done with a video after the fact.)
posted by straight at 2:36 PM on November 14, 2022


Also, all the supercut links are fun and appreciated, but this is so much funnier because it all takes place in one setting, making it seem like someone actually saying "beef" over and over again. Don Draper saying "What" in a thousand different scenes isn't the same kind of funny.
posted by straight at 2:39 PM on November 14, 2022 [1 favorite]


Sir Beefs-a-lot
posted by kirkaracha at 3:23 PM on November 14, 2022


people were counting beefs

I was going to say they were counting beeves, but you're right, they were counting "beef"s.
posted by kirkaracha at 3:25 PM on November 14, 2022


NOT THE BEEEEEEEEEEVES!!
posted by Greg_Ace at 3:46 PM on November 14, 2022


I started watching this video today about fulfilling orders on Shopify but noticed that someone commented "drink a shot every time he says 'Go Ahead'" and got so drunk in five minutes that I passed out .
posted by bendy at 7:19 PM on November 14, 2022


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