EU Would Cry Too If It Happened To EU
December 2, 2022 1:32 PM Subscribe
EU throws party in €387K metaverse — and hardly anyone turns up [Politico]
The Global Gateway Metaverse, where there's always a line to get in
The European Union Spent Nearly $400,000 on Its Own Metaverse and No One Came to Its Virtual Party [Gizmodo]
EU aid dept’s €387k metaverse meets real-world critique [Devex]
People, technologies & infrastructure – Europe's plan to thrive in the metaverse [Blog of Commissioner Thierry Breton]
WELCOME TO EU METAVERSE: EUME
Relevant
The Global Gateway Metaverse, where there's always a line to get in
The European Union Spent Nearly $400,000 on Its Own Metaverse and No One Came to Its Virtual Party [Gizmodo]
EU aid dept’s €387k metaverse meets real-world critique [Devex]
People, technologies & infrastructure – Europe's plan to thrive in the metaverse [Blog of Commissioner Thierry Breton]
WELCOME TO EU METAVERSE: EUME
Relevant
I’ve been in locations which suddenly got a lot of EU funding to do things like “increase engagement”, or for economic investment, and they normally just dump a lot of money into whatever tech-bro thing is in fashion at the minute. Tech bros are there waiting to hoover up that cash with reports and graphs, terrified of putting money into the wrong place. For the past twenty years you couldn’t go wrong with “investment in IT related business”. Looks like that time is over, so expect to see some weird choices made by career politicians in their 50/60s.
posted by The River Ivel at 2:11 PM on December 2, 2022 [13 favorites]
posted by The River Ivel at 2:11 PM on December 2, 2022 [13 favorites]
Well done on the post title.
posted by dsword at 2:20 PM on December 2, 2022 [50 favorites]
posted by dsword at 2:20 PM on December 2, 2022 [50 favorites]
Just goes to show how much effort Meta had to go to to set $15 billion on fire to produce a legless Metaverse. Anyone can spend $400k on one; it takes a true disruptor to burn 15 billion dollars.
posted by BungaDunga at 2:21 PM on December 2, 2022 [17 favorites]
posted by BungaDunga at 2:21 PM on December 2, 2022 [17 favorites]
anyway, hilariously, if you try to actually enter it right now it just displays "SOMETIMES, EVEN IN THE METAVERSE, WE RUN OUT OF SPACE. Don’t refresh your browser or you’ll go to the end of the queue. There are 19 guests in front of you."
posted by BungaDunga at 2:23 PM on December 2, 2022 [7 favorites]
posted by BungaDunga at 2:23 PM on December 2, 2022 [7 favorites]
Funny, this never happened in The Black Sun.
posted by Ishbadiddle at 2:43 PM on December 2, 2022 [10 favorites]
posted by Ishbadiddle at 2:43 PM on December 2, 2022 [10 favorites]
Maybe if they’d shown a bunch of avatars standing around looking at TikTok on their phones, the draw would be been larger. But *dancing* ?
posted by armoir from antproof case at 2:51 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by armoir from antproof case at 2:51 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
How many billions of dollars did Club Penguin cost to make?
posted by Theiform at 2:55 PM on December 2, 2022 [6 favorites]
posted by Theiform at 2:55 PM on December 2, 2022 [6 favorites]
Literally the ONLY group of people I've heard of using any form of VR regularly are furries using VRChat. And I think furries are the folks who kept Second Life alive for years beyond its logical lifespan. (I spent a weekend hanging in a house with one guy on a computer making sure his SL character was ABSOLUTELY PERFECT, and they're doing it now with VR.)
I don't know what people think VR alternate reality is going to be useful for. Even watching classic takes on it like Wild Palms never makes it clear WHY people are going there, simply that they ARE.
The reason people like doing things online is that it's a flat screen in front of them and they can pay attention to the rest of life around them. The immersion of VR is probably going to be great for a new form of cinema or novel or some kind of experience like that, but going shopping in VR? I don't see that as ever being a popular option.
posted by hippybear at 3:02 PM on December 2, 2022 [13 favorites]
I don't know what people think VR alternate reality is going to be useful for. Even watching classic takes on it like Wild Palms never makes it clear WHY people are going there, simply that they ARE.
The reason people like doing things online is that it's a flat screen in front of them and they can pay attention to the rest of life around them. The immersion of VR is probably going to be great for a new form of cinema or novel or some kind of experience like that, but going shopping in VR? I don't see that as ever being a popular option.
posted by hippybear at 3:02 PM on December 2, 2022 [13 favorites]
I never thought watching Zuckerberg fuck himself by burning large stacks of money would be so entertaining, but wow, it really is the greatest thing ever
posted by ivanthenotsoterrible at 3:07 PM on December 2, 2022 [9 favorites]
posted by ivanthenotsoterrible at 3:07 PM on December 2, 2022 [9 favorites]
Almost as good as Elon crashing and burning.
posted by Splunge at 3:10 PM on December 2, 2022 [5 favorites]
posted by Splunge at 3:10 PM on December 2, 2022 [5 favorites]
No one could have predicted this.
posted by Selena777 at 3:12 PM on December 2, 2022 [9 favorites]
posted by Selena777 at 3:12 PM on December 2, 2022 [9 favorites]
And there's also some crypto tokens because of course. But their NFTs are not flying off the shelves I wonder why lol
posted by credulous at 3:14 PM on December 2, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by credulous at 3:14 PM on December 2, 2022 [2 favorites]
Did they sell limited edition souvenir NFTs of the event?
posted by ocschwar at 4:38 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by ocschwar at 4:38 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
Literally the ONLY group of people I've heard of using any form of VR regularly are furries using VRChat.
That, a handful of people playing competitive VR games online, and a much larger group of people playing single player VR games (of which there are getting to be quite a number of seriously good ones). The metaverse is stupid AF, but VR itself has legs (if you'll pardon the pun).
posted by Dysk at 4:44 PM on December 2, 2022 [4 favorites]
That, a handful of people playing competitive VR games online, and a much larger group of people playing single player VR games (of which there are getting to be quite a number of seriously good ones). The metaverse is stupid AF, but VR itself has legs (if you'll pardon the pun).
posted by Dysk at 4:44 PM on December 2, 2022 [4 favorites]
They spent $400k for that. Where did that money go? I suspect someone got grifted.
posted by nushustu at 4:45 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by nushustu at 4:45 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
Normally I'd be chuckling with bemusement, but it was the foreign fucking aid department! Did they run out of people starving to death? Not enough wars and indiscriminate rape to go 'round? WTF.
posted by aramaic at 4:57 PM on December 2, 2022 [10 favorites]
posted by aramaic at 4:57 PM on December 2, 2022 [10 favorites]
Paging Jamiroquai. Jamiroquai to the white courtesy goggles.
posted by dephlogisticated at 5:22 PM on December 2, 2022 [6 favorites]
posted by dephlogisticated at 5:22 PM on December 2, 2022 [6 favorites]
The EU logo looks a lot like one of those animated loading icons so maybe people assumed it wasn't ready yet
posted by one for the books at 5:45 PM on December 2, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by one for the books at 5:45 PM on December 2, 2022 [2 favorites]
Here we are talking about EU foreign aid and their new One Belt One Road style Initiative — so I guess the project can be called a success?
posted by UN at 5:50 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by UN at 5:50 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
> credulous: "But their NFTs are not flying off the shelves I wonder why lol"
The tagline for the "EU Metaverse VIP Club" is "Unique 27 EU presidents and monarchs, 3D Avatars, welcome and call for participation in the EU Metaverse project!", the collection appears to consist of only 17, not 27, cartoonish (and, tbh, not very good) portraits: one of the Queen of Denmark and 16 of presidents of EU countries including the president of "Chech Republic" which is wrong in at least two different ways. Oh also, the respective heads of state are all wearing crypto-related buttons and also a Meta (aka Facebook) logo. Like practically everything NFT-related, this is just terribly, terribly embarrassing.
posted by mhum at 5:52 PM on December 2, 2022 [8 favorites]
The tagline for the "EU Metaverse VIP Club" is "Unique 27 EU presidents and monarchs, 3D Avatars, welcome and call for participation in the EU Metaverse project!", the collection appears to consist of only 17, not 27, cartoonish (and, tbh, not very good) portraits: one of the Queen of Denmark and 16 of presidents of EU countries including the president of "Chech Republic" which is wrong in at least two different ways. Oh also, the respective heads of state are all wearing crypto-related buttons and also a Meta (aka Facebook) logo. Like practically everything NFT-related, this is just terribly, terribly embarrassing.
posted by mhum at 5:52 PM on December 2, 2022 [8 favorites]
Well, this episode of Parlement wrote itself.
posted by polytope subirb enby-of-piano-dice at 8:25 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by polytope subirb enby-of-piano-dice at 8:25 PM on December 2, 2022 [1 favorite]
Having played around with VR, I just don't see any reason for it to be more than an entertainment device; either I'm using it for games, or I'm socializing with friends on VRChat. The idea that I'd want to spend a significant portion of my everyday life in there, especially for stuff like work or whatever other boring thing they've cooked up for the Metaverse is ludicrous.
And honestly the specific appeal of VRChat (like Second Life before it), was that you could present yourself however you preferred with very little in the way of restrictions. Don't like your gender, body type, species, whatever? You can change it, and the sky's the limit, and you can be with like-minded friends there as well. I don't see Meta ever getting to that point. And even if they do, they'll want their cut.
posted by Aleyn at 9:03 PM on December 2, 2022 [4 favorites]
And honestly the specific appeal of VRChat (like Second Life before it), was that you could present yourself however you preferred with very little in the way of restrictions. Don't like your gender, body type, species, whatever? You can change it, and the sky's the limit, and you can be with like-minded friends there as well. I don't see Meta ever getting to that point. And even if they do, they'll want their cut.
posted by Aleyn at 9:03 PM on December 2, 2022 [4 favorites]
After waiting in lie for 3 or 4 minutes, I made it into the EU metaverse and walked around the place and it seemed ... fine? Yes, legs in the metaverse!
I watched a video interview of a student who went abroad in the EU on the ERASMUS program. Walked around some more and saw some algorithmic art. At some point I found a rabbit stuck in a bush that I could not free. I declined when a pop-up informed me that I found the golden animal and could "evaporate" it.
Anyway it doesn’t seem like this is meant to be "the metaverse" in any way whatsoever. It’s a promotional website for the EU with the budget to match. €400k may seem like a lot but a few months of artist, designer and engineer pay evaporates quickly in this kind of work. Building an EU website comes with many requirements — translations, data privacy, accessibility, etc. None of that comes out of the box for free.
The EU is paying people to work on a public information campaign. I’d rather have those people work on projects like this using my EU taxes than having them throw their talent into the Zuckerverse or whatever.
posted by UN at 7:12 AM on December 3, 2022 [5 favorites]
I watched a video interview of a student who went abroad in the EU on the ERASMUS program. Walked around some more and saw some algorithmic art. At some point I found a rabbit stuck in a bush that I could not free. I declined when a pop-up informed me that I found the golden animal and could "evaporate" it.
Anyway it doesn’t seem like this is meant to be "the metaverse" in any way whatsoever. It’s a promotional website for the EU with the budget to match. €400k may seem like a lot but a few months of artist, designer and engineer pay evaporates quickly in this kind of work. Building an EU website comes with many requirements — translations, data privacy, accessibility, etc. None of that comes out of the box for free.
The EU is paying people to work on a public information campaign. I’d rather have those people work on projects like this using my EU taxes than having them throw their talent into the Zuckerverse or whatever.
posted by UN at 7:12 AM on December 3, 2022 [5 favorites]
The EU's actually less likely nowadays to burn money on silly promotions - in particular rules for promo gadgets for infrastructure funds got tightened a lot, which means you no longer get things like portable grills or art kits to promote port investments (at least the car emergency kit was thematic for a car ferry). Honestly in terms of EU assistance funds 400K euro is peanuts, and it did get people talking and checking it out.
posted by I claim sanctuary at 10:17 PM on December 3, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by I claim sanctuary at 10:17 PM on December 3, 2022 [1 favorite]
> I don't know what people think VR alternate reality is going to be useful for.
Dogfight flight simulator games.
First-person shooters.
Interior design/architecture walkthroughs.
I think that about covers it.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 1:22 PM on December 4, 2022
Dogfight flight simulator games.
First-person shooters.
Interior design/architecture walkthroughs.
I think that about covers it.
posted by Aardvark Cheeselog at 1:22 PM on December 4, 2022
I guess the project can be called a success?
Possibly, yes. On the other hand, they also could have randomly chosen four hundred people to get a thousand euros free and clear, and probably would have had even more exposure. Or, frankly, pick one random person on the planet (being that this was foreign aid), give that person the four hundred thousand (or, more realistically, a quarter-mil and the rest in financial advising, security, and potential relocation costs), and bask in the massive free publicity when some truck driver in Senegal becomes wealthy.
...versus this thing, which will be forgotten by literally everyone within (checks watch) about five days, and will just sit there burning pointless CPU until someone decides it's an embarrassment and shuts it down.
Then again, I'm wildly biased (eg, I feel that the US should pick one random taxpayer each year, based on who files taxes, and give them a fortune [after auditing them] as an incentive to the rest of us).
posted by aramaic at 4:53 PM on December 4, 2022
Possibly, yes. On the other hand, they also could have randomly chosen four hundred people to get a thousand euros free and clear, and probably would have had even more exposure. Or, frankly, pick one random person on the planet (being that this was foreign aid), give that person the four hundred thousand (or, more realistically, a quarter-mil and the rest in financial advising, security, and potential relocation costs), and bask in the massive free publicity when some truck driver in Senegal becomes wealthy.
...versus this thing, which will be forgotten by literally everyone within (checks watch) about five days, and will just sit there burning pointless CPU until someone decides it's an embarrassment and shuts it down.
Then again, I'm wildly biased (eg, I feel that the US should pick one random taxpayer each year, based on who files taxes, and give them a fortune [after auditing them] as an incentive to the rest of us).
posted by aramaic at 4:53 PM on December 4, 2022
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posted by Going To Maine at 1:51 PM on December 2, 2022 [14 favorites]