This Is Not Laid Back

January 29, 2023 2:47 PM

Almost ten minutes of a cutesy depressed anthropomorphic bread undergoing existential torture, a daily occurence for Bernd das Brot (previously) every night when the Kinder Kanal is not broadcasting. In German with English subtitles.
posted by MartinWisse (11 comments total)

If his existential predicament doesn’t frighten you, his hands surely will.
posted by BostonTerrier at 3:30 PM on January 29, 2023

I don’t know why I was surprised to see a quickbread. There’s the quick and …
posted by clew at 3:45 PM on January 29, 2023 [1 favorite]

Wilkommen zu Zombo dot com. Mit Zombo dot com, das Brot kann etwas macht.
posted by credulous at 3:56 PM on January 29, 2023 [9 favorites]

Bernd's New Year Speech is a classic in my household. When my kid does not empty the dishwasher (or litter box, etc.), I put on my glum Bernd voice and say "IT WOULD ONLY HAVE TAKEN A MINUTE...LINDA."
posted by MonkeyToes at 5:41 PM on January 29, 2023 [4 favorites]

Oh my god. I was on a work trip to Germany a few years ago and as a result of jet lag I passed out, fully dressed, on the foot of my hotel bed, with the lights on and with the television playing Bernd das Brodt on repeat.

I spent hours in a half-awake, half-dreaming, near-psychedelic daze in which I was both trying to prompt myself to get up, put on pajamas, and turn the lights off, and struggling to make sense—through a linguistic barrier and over and over again—of what was going on with an anthropomorphic bread puppet's musical career.

He kept getting dropped into a white liminal space. I kept getting dropped into a white liminal space. I fell asleep sober and woke up hours later feeling like I had taken some kind of unimaginably hard drug.

Anyhow, if you're into sullen baked goods, you might want to check out Kogepan as well.
posted by evidenceofabsence at 8:02 PM on January 29, 2023 [2 favorites]

This appears to be the 25-minute loop that scarred my subconscious mind.
posted by evidenceofabsence at 8:22 PM on January 29, 2023 [2 favorites]

ZE KIKA LOUNGE

We put this in tonight at the end of a MST Club show and it was suitably entertaining/creepy.
posted by JHarris at 10:48 PM on January 29, 2023

Also, what does GlaDOS have against that bread person?
posted by JHarris at 10:49 PM on January 29, 2023 [1 favorite]

This is fantastic. That New Year's speech was exactly what I wanted to see today. I'm going to need to watch more Bernd das Brot.
posted by rednikki at 7:36 AM on January 30, 2023 [1 favorite]

I like it! It has a sort of kid-friendly Williams Street feel. Or maybe that's what I think because Bernd is shaped like Master Shake.
posted by Countess Elena at 9:04 AM on January 30, 2023 [1 favorite]

I kind of wonder if the whole thing might be recorded somewhere? This is the kind of thing that US cable channels would do sometimes back when the medium was newer, and I miss those days. You might turn on Nick At Nite and they'd just show all of their fun ad spots of one type in a row, unannounced. It was an era where TV programmers weren't trying to monetize every possible second of spare broadcast time with infomercials or reruns.

Though really, I haven't watched broadcast or cable TV in decades, so they could do things like this all the time for all I know. I think I'd hear more about it now though, if it were happening.
posted by JHarris at 10:40 AM on January 31, 2023