I Cut 100 Foods with a Pizza Cutter
January 31, 2023 6:17 PM   Subscribe

Receipes you can make with a pizza wheel [slyt]

Come for the review of how well foods cut with a pizza knutter. Stay for the snapshot of what a random brit has in their kitchen.
posted by rebent (38 comments total) 10 users marked this as a favorite
Pizza wheel is how I chop up cilantro leaves.
posted by hypnogogue at 6:46 PM on January 31 [2 favorites]

OMG. My fam and our best friend fam stayed at a fancyish cabin in a state park for new years. On the first night we made pizzas for kids and adults w TJs dough. I pulled out the rando pizza wheel cutter stocked in the fancyish cabin kitchen drawer, and said, "this will cut nothing".
Reader, it cut everything (well, pizza).
I don't know. It looked like a dull piece of shit. But it was the best pizza wheel cutter thing I ever saw. I def wanted to steal it, but didn't. We do have reservations already for next new years. Maybe we'll be in the same cabin.
posted by atomicstone at 7:50 PM on January 31 [1 favorite]

i use mine all the time, but i am pleased with this video for telling me of the existence of potato waffles.
posted by Clowder of bats at 8:02 PM on January 31

Have we reached the bottom yet?
posted by fairmettle at 8:10 PM on January 31

Once I saw him use it on Quiches Lorraine, Potato Grids and Large Macs I was sure he'd get to Hoisin Crispy Owl or Discount Foie Gras at some point but no dice.
posted by wilberforce at 8:57 PM on January 31 [3 favorites]

As an Usian, I find the literalness of brittish food names entertaining.

"The wheel cuts this cherry-bake-chew quite well"
posted by The Power Nap at 9:00 PM on January 31 [1 favorite]

Yes, we can use use sharp edges to cut up food. This was needlessly repetitive with the sandwiches and pies. I've been using pizza cutters to cut food my whole life. They work especially well on quesadillas. Also, just a sharp knife. That works pretty well too.
posted by Avelwood at 9:02 PM on January 31 [1 favorite]

As an Usian, I find the literalness of brittish food names entertaining.

You'll never guess what spotted dick is made out of
posted by Merus at 9:05 PM on January 31 [2 favorites]

Scone bat'leth.
posted by clavdivs at 9:06 PM on January 31 [1 favorite]

I think that's a Bakewell tart. Named after the town of Bakewell.
posted by Keith Talent at 9:16 PM on January 31 [2 favorites]

Toad in the hole?
posted by freethefeet at 10:00 PM on January 31

The brits have unsettlingly limp pizza. It was genuinely distressing watching those slices sag as they were picked up.
posted by Jon_Evil at 10:26 PM on January 31

It is absolutely terrifying for me to watch, what's keeping him from cutting his left hand's fingers? A knife can rest against your holding hand while cutting just fine.
posted by weewooweewoo at 10:41 PM on January 31

No pizza I've ever had here in the UK has been a limp as what the teenage mutant ninja turtles eat. I refuse to believe that is anything but the definitive statement on what US pizza is like. /s

(Most pizza here is pretty bad, great stuff is available, this has been true in every country in which I've lived.)
posted by Dysk at 10:44 PM on January 31 [1 favorite]

It was genuinely distressing watching those slices sag as they were picked

I know, you're supposed to fold them in half longitudinally for structural value! /skateboards on the UMass Fine Arts Center
posted by away for regrooving at 11:18 PM on January 31

I want to get them an Alaskan Ulu knife.

But I suppose there are many names around the world for 'knife with the handle on the back, instead of at one end'. No?
Anyway, I've recommended them to people whose grip or blade control has become a little wobbly; maneuvers differently than a 'chef knife'.
With a flat cutting board, you can just rock it back and forth like a seesaw. With a bowl shaped board, you can bash herbs into tiny bits.
Or you can disassemble a salmon for drying. (competitvely)
posted by bartleby at 11:51 PM on January 31 [4 favorites]

i just kept reading your header as "I Cut 100 Fools with a Pizza Cutter" and thinking, well... yeah?
posted by lapolla at 12:39 AM on February 1

My wife has a "pizza cutter" for fabrics, and it works extremely well. It's a great gift for any person doing textile crafts.
posted by Harald74 at 3:42 AM on February 1 [1 favorite]

Spaghetti Bolognese, to make it easier to eat.

"My love, is spaghetti, you cannot do this."
posted by Meatbomb at 5:24 AM on February 1 [2 favorites]

Ulus look intriguing, but every bit of video I've seen of them in use suggests that they're not great for fine chopping (unless you want to mince something on a bowl-shaped board). I have a hard time seeing it replacing a classic chef's knife, cleaver or santoku as an all-rounder, but I suspect that says more about my culinary background than the viability of the knife.
posted by Dysk at 6:03 AM on February 1 [1 favorite]

Everything about this video - the music, the foods chosen, the quality of the cutting - perfectly illustrates the term “cha bu duo” (差不多) or doing just the minimum
posted by PatchesPal at 8:01 AM on February 1 [2 favorites]

I have that ulu knife. It's kinda hard to chop or slice anything neatly with it, at least on a regular cutting board.
posted by snuffleupagus at 8:05 AM on February 1

Pizza scissors or GTFO.

Seriously they rock.
posted by WaterAndPixels at 8:42 AM on February 1 [3 favorites]

Funny, I was just recently thinking of making Scotch eggs; never made them before. The thought came to me when I watched Steven Colbert and he talked about Oreos filled with…Oreos.

Foods stuffed into other foods, because freedom.

Using a pizza cutter to cut food stuffed food would be an added surprise for the company.
posted by waving at 8:48 AM on February 1

His, and some of your pizza cutters, must be a lot sharper than mine. I hardly ever use mine, not even for cutting pizza.
My ulu sees some action, but not a lot. I mince things with it, sometimes, because I feel there is a more controlled grip for mincing slippery stuff like meat or fish and I like it can move things around, like a santoku. I think you have to master the technique, and though someone gave me a very brief course some 30 years ago, I haven't practiced enough. After seeing that video, I want to try to fillet a big fish with it now. But I'm not sure well I'll get my hands on a big fish, because of the prices.
posted by mumimor at 8:51 AM on February 1

Using scissors on pizza deserves a longer comment. The pizza cutter wheel device is a neat gadget, but unless it's finger slicing sharp, it can't do its job. Where the kitchen is one of the most dangerous rooms in your house, the fewer instruments of death, the better. The problem with the pizza wheel is that it doesn't create its own opposing action, so you have to put some pressure into the wheel and into the board to force separation in order for the wheel to do its job cutting. Scissors on the other hand, have that opposing force - the other blade, and so even when not samurai-sword-cutting-silk-in-the-air sharp, they get the job done handily. Now, this assumes that you're not having deep dish pizza, but the ontology of that being pizza is a shiny derail.
posted by fragmede at 9:16 AM on February 1 [2 favorites]

OXO Good Grips 4" Pizza Wheel was ranked #1 of those tested by Cook’s Country

“This wheel did it all—it was comfortable to hold and allowed for a powerful grip. Its streamlined design didn’t trap food, and it still looked brand new after 10 rounds in the dishwasher. Its blade was sharp and visible for precise, straight cuts. The blade was tall, too, at 4 inches, so it rolled right over stacked toppings and towering crusts with ease.”

Dreamfarm Scizza
Mercer Culinary Millennia Pizza Cutter 4"

American Metalcraft PPC4 Plastic-Handled Pizza Cutter, 4-Inch Diameter
Dexter-Russell Sani-Safe 4" Pizza Cutter

Trudeau Stress Less Pizza Cutter
Microplane Pizza Cutter
Pizzacraft Soft Grip Handled Rocking Pizza Cutter
Savora Pizza Wheel
OXO Good Grips Clean Cut Pizza Wheel
Zyliss Pizza Wheel
Fissler Magic Pizza Cutter
Rösle Pizza Cutter
Bialetti Pizza Chopper
Epicurean 16" Pizza Cutter
Rösle Pizza Wheel
Pizzacraft Rocking Pizza Cutter

I wonder how the $66 Cutco would rank.
posted by waving at 9:27 AM on February 1

Epicurean 16" Pizza Cutter

I have this cutter and it does a good job of slicing pizza. Also useful for cutting up pita, focaccia, and other flat breads. I like that it isn't particularly sharp so you can't do real damage to yourself with it and it doesn't pull up a lot of cheese as it goes along.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 1:03 PM on February 1

"Quiches Lorraine"

A+++ will read comments from this person again.
posted by 43rdAnd9th at 2:13 PM on February 1 [2 favorites]

Ima gonna try this.
posted by Oyéah at 8:22 PM on February 1

(It's a much less complicated recipe if you don't explicitly need it to be gluten-free, as the above is: example. Obviously doesn't help anyone who does want it gluten-free, but now both versions are linked in this thread!)
posted by Dysk at 8:29 PM on February 1

Wut: Festool, German maker of high-end power tools, also have a pizza cutter.
posted by Harald74 at 10:31 PM on February 1 [1 favorite]

I've never used a pizza cutter, but now thinking of buying one. Are they really better than a knife on pizza? Are they really useful on non-pizzas, or just a slightly worse knife which is what the video seems to show? Are they like garlic presses where the cheap ones are worse than a knife but the quality ones are an improvement?
posted by TheophileEscargot at 1:44 AM on February 2

I've never used a pizza cutter, but now thinking of buying one. Are they really better than a knife on pizza?

I have one, and I find it a pain to clean, so I don't even use it cut pizza, I just use a knife. And IMO, they don't do that great a job of cutting pizza. But then I'm not a professional, and don't care if my pizza edge is ragged, but this kind of looked like fun, and I'm going to try it out on a bunch of stuff.
posted by The_Vegetables at 1:29 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]

I've never used a pizza cutter, but now thinking of buying one. Are they really better than a knife on pizza?

Again, pizza scissors or GTFO :)

There are some with thin bottom blade so you don’t need to lift the pizza much for cutting but with an oversized top blade so you can tilt it and use it to serve slices.
posted by WaterAndPixels at 3:15 PM on February 2 [1 favorite]

Thanks! I'll try the pizza scissors, they look easier on the plate too.
posted by TheophileEscargot at 5:34 AM on February 3

Thanks! I'll try the pizza scissors, they look easier on the plate too.

Oh that too, I've got a set of aluminum trays for pizza (I love cooking pizzas at home), the ones I got after I switched to scissors look brand new compared to the old ones.

I have a pair made for pizza now, but it worked well with my simple kitchen scissors too. You just need scissors you'll be able to wash.
posted by WaterAndPixels at 7:56 AM on February 3 [1 favorite]

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