Further Debate Required

March 15, 2023 12:25 PM

Fellow MeFites, a grave injustice to the categorization of sandwiches has been perpetrated by the site Rotating Sandwiches.

Does inclusion on this website serve as proof that the hot dog is a sandwich? Has humankind slipped further into the grip of madness? Is this simply a distraction from work on a slow Wednesday?

I believe the time has come for Metafilter to finally settle what is and is not a sandwich.

posted by Abehammerb Lincoln (106 comments total)

MetaFilter: is not a sandwich
posted by Fizz at 12:27 PM on March 15, 2023 [11 favorites]

Kinda want a sandwich
posted by bxvr at 12:31 PM on March 15, 2023 [6 favorites]

I meant to make all of these Slack emojis at some point. Now there are more!
posted by limeonaire at 12:33 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

Why are two of them going the wrong way?
posted by newpotato at 12:36 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

I believe I can solve this thing once and for all: a sandwich is not a geometric or architectural form. it is not a listing of organic molecules. A sandwich is pleasure, condensed. It is a promise held in the hand that your days will end someday, but not today. It is, ideally, a panopoly of procedures, textures, flavors, but sometimes an attempt to do the best with what you've got.

More specifically, it is at least 3 things that you put in your mouth with your hand.

Lovely website. Thank you.
posted by jy4m at 12:36 PM on March 15, 2023 [8 favorites]

Why are two of them going the wrong way?

A sign of not sandwich-hood?

Or all the rest of them are going the wrong way?
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 12:43 PM on March 15, 2023 [4 favorites]

Q: Why is one never hungry at the beach?
A: Because of the sand which is there.
posted by chavenet at 12:43 PM on March 15, 2023 [21 favorites]

If an open faced sandwich is a sandwich, so are hotdogs and tacos. Only in an open universe is there a distinction. Have a Klein bottle with theoretical ketchup to go with your fries.
posted by BrotherCaine at 12:44 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

Sandwichness is a continuum, not an absolute and therefore lies on a scale, where one end is the Platonic ideal of a sandwich and all other things, like hot dogs, tacos, and Francesinha lie somewhere on that line.
posted by Comrade_robot at 12:44 PM on March 15, 2023 [8 favorites]

the Francesinha is the boss level sandwich.
posted by chavenet at 12:50 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

The one at the bottom is more concerning to me than the hot dog -- I'm not ready to acknowledge that a fried egg sitting on top of a rotted out baked potato is a sandwich.
posted by charismatic megafauna at 12:50 PM on March 15, 2023 [6 favorites]

"More specifically, it is at least 3 things that you put in your mouth with your hand."

The single piece of potato bread spread with peanut butter and folded in half I just ate would suggest 'two' things, rather than three.
posted by FritoKAL at 12:53 PM on March 15, 2023 [9 favorites]

The "is a hot dog a sandwich?" debate has been definitively settled by the Cube Rule.

You cannot argue with basic geometry. It's just math, people.
posted by foldedfish at 12:54 PM on March 15, 2023 [15 favorites]

Rocky's Deli Specialty Sammies. I am particularly partial to the Lutherburger Cheeseburger (I add bacon and a fried egg) between two glazed donuts. A donut is a type of bread.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 12:56 PM on March 15, 2023

"A hot dog and a hamburger contain the same number of particles. On a quantum level there's no discernible difference. Sandwiches and non-sandwiches are unquantifiable abstracts. Why should I be concerned?"

-- Dr. Manwich-hattan
posted by Strange Interlude at 1:00 PM on March 15, 2023 [4 favorites]

Kinda want a sandwich

I kinda want one too, but stationary
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 1:01 PM on March 15, 2023 [4 favorites]

This thread needs a theme song.

If it's not lunch for you yet, you can have some breakfast. NSFW!
posted by loquacious at 1:04 PM on March 15, 2023

OMG there goes my afternoon...

give me 100 words in the style of Donald Trump about really wanting a reuben
...again, but make him in extreme desperation
...make it even more Donald Trump-y
...ok, even more desperate and somehow tie in that he actually won the 2020 election


Listen folks, I'm in a pickle here. I won the 2020 election fair and square, everybody knows it, believe me. But without a Reuben, I can't even enjoy my victory. It's a sad state of affairs, folks, a really sad state of affairs. I'm in the depths of despair here, all because I can't get my hands on a Reuben sandwich. It's like the whole world is against me, trying to deny me my victory and my sandwich. But let me tell you, I won't stand for it. I'll fight tooth and nail for that Reuben, and for my rightful place as president. So let's get that sandwich, folks, and let's make America great again!
posted by Reasonably Everything Happens at 1:10 PM on March 15, 2023 [5 favorites]

To me, a hot dog is not a sandwich, but you do you, preferably, way the fuck over there away from me and we'll get along just fine.

No, a bit further.

Further.

OK, that's ... watch out for the ...

Oooh. That's gonna leave a mark.

Yeah, far enough.
posted by JustSayNoDawg at 1:11 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

I believe the time has come for Metafilter to finally settle what is and is not a sandwich.

Sh'yeah, like that's ever gonna happen.
posted by Greg_Ace at 1:12 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

I feel like a hamburger, falafel, and a burrito are sandwiches, while a hot dog, taco, and pizza are not.
posted by exolstice at 1:19 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Wait, so is an arugula and olive oil pizza an open face sandwich or a salad in a bread bowl?
posted by BlackLeotardFront at 1:26 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

A burrito is NOT a sandwich. Don’t make me turn this car around.
posted by computech_apolloniajames at 1:27 PM on March 15, 2023 [4 favorites]

-------------------------------------------
SANDWICH ALIGNMENT CHART
--------------------------------------------

is the TEXT above this an actual sandwich?
posted by lalochezia at 1:28 PM on March 15, 2023 [10 favorites]

The song that came into my head was this one.

A flute with no holes is not a flute, a donut with no hole is a Danish.
posted by credulous at 1:28 PM on March 15, 2023

Sandwich is in the eye of the beholder! If I want to say this pile of glop is sandwich, then it's sandwich! If you say it is not, then it is not! Sandwich is quantum, existing in multiple states.

To enter into the sandwich debate is to give in to prescriptivist dogma, and hence fascism. Which is the opposite of deliciousness.
posted by slogger at 1:30 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

I came for the sammich, but only got these lame, rotating sandwiches.
posted by Chuffy at 1:33 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

In the linked sandwich alignment chart, "structural purist, ingredient rebel" shows ice cream between two waffles, which is on the edge of plausibility. But the KFC Double Down (bacon, cheese, and sauce between two pieces of fried chicken) clearly demonstrates the failure of that that proposition.
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 1:34 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Everything is a sandwich. Just as everything is a chinchilla, and everything is a postage stamp. It's just a question of the degree of side-eye you get when you make the claim.

Have I cleared that up?
posted by pipeski at 1:39 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

is the TEXT above this an actual sandwich?

It's a moving target
posted by They sucked his brains out! at 1:40 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Why are two of them going the wrong way?
Has the site been updated? I count three going one way and nineteen going the other way.
I see [parts of] a Shrimp Po Boy, a Hot Muffuletta, and a Cubano going clockwise, i.e.- the right way.
The others are going widdershins.
posted by MtDewd at 1:41 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

followed by rotating gastrointestinal problems
posted by phooky at 1:42 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Why are two of them going the wrong way?


ALL of them are going the wrong way. Everyone knows sandwiches should be rotated around the x-axis, not the y-axis!
posted by nickmark at 1:42 PM on March 15, 2023 [4 favorites]

Is a hotdog inside a tortilla a sandwich or a taco?
posted by ShakeyJake at 1:46 PM on March 15, 2023

If I tell you to go in the kitchen and make me a sandwich and you come out with a hot dog, you are going back in the kitchen until you get it right.

I love hot dogs, but they are no more a sandwich than an eclair is a sandwich.
posted by dobbs at 1:52 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

To me, a hot dog is not a sandwich...

posted by JustSayNoDawg at 5:11 PM on March 15 [+] [!]

Eponysterical?
posted by snofoam at 1:54 PM on March 15, 2023 [10 favorites]

That sandwich chart is brilliant and covers everything and is the final argument on that topic, I think, as far as that argument goes.

(Never would have occurred to me to put a choco taco in there, but hey!)
posted by jenfullmoon at 1:55 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

How is a taco not a sammich, but a gyro or a schawerma is a sammich? I need a ruling on this, stat!
posted by Chuffy at 2:05 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

I'm more bothered that some are cut than I whether or not they are sandwiches. Consistency should rule all.
posted by The_Vegetables at 2:05 PM on March 15, 2023

This is one of the strangest sites I've seen in some time. I have no idea how these people got their sandwiches to rotate, or why.
posted by spilon at 2:06 PM on March 15, 2023 [9 favorites]

Only when served in a bun or using a slice(s) of bread "hotdog" qualify as a sandwich and technically these should be called "hot dog sandwiches" as they are not just hot dogs. Other forms of hot dog based foods are generally not sandwiches for example: corn dogs, pigs in a blanket, etc. I do not consider a chili dog a sandwich as it is impossible to eat with out a fork or other utensil and sandwiches should be consumable by hand IMO.
posted by interogative mood at 2:07 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Yes, interogative mood, a hot dog is not a sandwich because a hot dog sandwich is an actual thing. It's when there's still two hot dogs left in the 10-pack, but you've already gone through the pack of 8 hot dog buns. So for lunch your mom slices a hot dog in two lengthwise and crosswise, then puts those four pieces in between two slices of white bread with mustard. And it's sad and makes you wish you had a real hot dog, not this crappy hot dog sandwich.
posted by indexy at 2:08 PM on March 15, 2023 [17 favorites]

no chip roll (aka chip butty if you grew up in the wrong place; not the same as a crisp sandwich) so a total loss
posted by scruss at 2:13 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

Only when served in a bun or using a slice(s) of bread "hotdog" qualify as a sandwich and technically these should be called "hot dog sandwiches" as they are not just hot dogs.

But then how do we disambiguate hotdog (yeasted bun and meat construct) from hotdog (isolated meat product)? What unit does a hotdog (isolated meat product) come in? A link? A segment? A clitellum? Do I need to buy a hotdog sausage and a hotdog bun in order to construct a hotdog?

The entire taxonomy is simply baffling.
posted by slogger at 2:21 PM on March 15, 2023

Metafilter: The entire taxonomy is simply baffling.
posted by Chuffy at 2:30 PM on March 15, 2023 [8 favorites]

If an open faced sandwich is a sandwich, so are hotdogs and tacos.

Soft tacos, perhaps. Those hard, brittle shells, though? Nope. Not sammiches.
posted by Thorzdad at 2:32 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

The single piece of potato bread spread with peanut butter and folded in half I just ate would suggest 'two' things, rather than three.

Three things. The bread, the peanut butter, and the fold. keanuwoah.gif
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 2:36 PM on March 15, 2023 [5 favorites]

Britannica provides some clarity about the sausage portion of the hot dog.
posted by JustSayNoDawg at 2:41 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Or all the rest of them are going the wrong way?
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln

Numismatically eponysterical.
posted by Sphinx at 2:53 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

The single piece of potato bread spread with peanut butter and folded in half I just ate would suggest 'two' things, rather than three.

With only the one piece of bread folded in half, it's only half a sandwich. To me, this actually suggests an important distinction that lets us escape the perennial conundrum of "is a hot dog a sandwich?"

The answer is: No. A hot dog is half of a sandwich. Same with tacos.
posted by mstokes650 at 3:25 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

Also, an open faced sandwich is absolutely not a sandwich. John Smith can call himself “John the Pope Smith” but that doesn’t make him the Pope.
posted by caviar2d2 at 3:31 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

“You put more value on every minute...You know I always kinda thought I did that. I really always enjoyed myself. But it’s more valuable now. You’re reminded to enjoy every sandwich and every minute.”

~~ Warren Zevon - October 30, 2002
posted by mikelieman at 3:34 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

Related XKCD.

Evidently Joe Biden *was* the sandwich all along.
posted by nat at 3:40 PM on March 15, 2023 [5 favorites]

So, a lobster roll is a sandwich?
posted by childofTethys at 3:43 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

In Vienna, we went to Kafka’s favorite sandwich shop which served small, bite sized, open face finger sandwiches. Let the beaning begin.
posted by njohnson23 at 4:01 PM on March 15, 2023

The Cube Rule of Food, the Grand Unified Theory of Food Identification

A hot dog is a taco

more detail here
posted by mbo at 4:17 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Surely this is the best of the web!
posted by Multicellular Exothermic at 4:24 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

How does it matter what is and is not a sandwich when we’ve established that everything is cake?
posted by ejs at 4:29 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

I am cake.
posted by goatdog at 4:35 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

I am cake.

The cake is a pie.
posted by loquacious at 4:53 PM on March 15, 2023 [8 favorites]

A hot dog is a taco

Wait, does a hot dog pre-date a taco? Are hot dogs technically tacos?

Further, what is a taco?
posted by loquacious at 4:55 PM on March 15, 2023

The pi is a lie
posted by Windopaene at 4:55 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

How many decimal places does God or the universe calculate for pi OH MY GOD HELP I'M IN A DOUGLAS HOFSTADER BOOK WRITTEN BY A VERY DRUNK BUCKMINSTER FULLER AND IT'S QUESTIONS ALL THE WAY DOWN HELP MY ONTOLOGIES ARE OBLIQUING AND I NEED A PLATONICALLY IDEAL SANDWICH OR I'M GOING TO LOSE MY FUDGE
posted by loquacious at 5:02 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

It wouldn't have killed them to put one vegetarian sandwich in there.
posted by charlesminus at 5:08 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

The posts about sandwiches are always funnier and make me hungrier than posts about beans.
posted by MtDewd at 5:13 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

NOW I WANT A HOT DOG FOR DINNER!

bastards
posted by Windopaene at 5:26 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

A taco would work as well.

And then only a terrible hard shell Taco Bell taco.

So hot dog it is
posted by Windopaene at 5:28 PM on March 15, 2023

an open faced sandwich is absolutely not a sandwich

This is erasure.
posted by gauche at 5:53 PM on March 15, 2023 [3 favorites]

Oh please, if you were intensely craving a sandwich and someone said "oh I'm heading to lunch to pick up a sandwich myself, I can pick up a sandwich for you!"

And then they brought you back a hot dog? You'd be livid. you'd be fucking furious! And it's because you would know in your heart that it's not a sandwich. Discussion over.
posted by windbox at 5:59 PM on March 15, 2023 [5 favorites]

While y’all were discussing sandwiches I ate one. Homemade French dip. It was delicious. It was also made Subway style, by cutting a wedge out of the top of the bread. So you can argue about whether it was a taco or a hot dog, but a sandwich by any other name….
posted by TedW at 6:25 PM on March 15, 2023 [4 favorites]

if you're on Twitter and like pictures of sandwiches, check out SandwichRecipez, which contains no recipes.
posted by dobbs at 6:27 PM on March 15, 2023

Cannot get the site to work due to too much adblocking. Sigh.

I have long since decided that sandwich is a term best defined by "I know it when I see it" but in general if it's not something the eponymous Earl could eat at the gaming table it's not a sandwich and if he could, it generally is.
posted by gentlyepigrams at 7:04 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

Only five of those things are sandwiches. All else aside, a sandwich MUST involve two slices of bread with something in between. A bun does not count, nor does a roll.
posted by dg at 7:12 PM on March 15, 2023 [2 favorites]

It wouldn't have killed them to put one vegetarian sandwich in there

'Tis easier to imagine the lowly hot dog as a sandwich than to dream up some ridiculous thing that does not include meat.

Checks out tbh, same shit I run into every time I try to find something to eat at a convenience store.
posted by tigrrrlily at 7:39 PM on March 15, 2023 [1 favorite]

Maybe if you’re picky about what constitutes a sandwich, you should start a club?
posted by armeowda at 7:57 PM on March 15, 2023

Folks, The American Diet Has a Sandwich Problem
archive link
posted by slater at 8:04 PM on March 15, 2023

Well maybe sandwiches have an American diet problem! Didja ever thing about that??
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:22 PM on March 15, 2023

Schlotzsky's doesn't open until 10 a.m., therefore Daylight Savings Time actually works in my favor today. Whodah thunkit?
There are nine items on their sandwich menu, including a veggie option (which is very nice). They apparently have not studied the Cube Rule.
I have no intention of schooling them.
I thought about thawing out some ground beef to make chili when the cold front blasts through tomorrow. Not that I am starting the "beans/no beans" debate again. That way lies madness.
For the record, chili in a bowl with crackers is not a sandwich. Frito pie is not a sandwich. Chili as a filling in a bun is a sandwich, and a darn good one.
posted by TrishaU at 5:49 AM on March 16, 2023

A bun does not count, nor does a roll.

This is simply not true. Hoagies, grinders, subs...all of these are unquestionably sandwiches, recognized as such by millions.
posted by Ipsifendus at 6:35 AM on March 16, 2023 [3 favorites]

At a recent housewarming party my request for a small glass of any convenient alcohol prompted some discussion on the etiquette of specifying exactly what you'd like in order to remove the dreadful burden of decision making from somebody who has already been gracious enough to agree to do you a favour, and somebody recounted an anecdote involving malicious compliance with a non-specific request culminating in the delivery of a banana and vegemite sandwich.

I therefore spent the time between then and the arrival of my drink mentally preparing to enjoy the hell out of whatever the alcoholic equivalent of a banana and vegemite sandwich might be. Turns out it was home distilled peach schnapps, and very delicious.

The moral of that story is clear: a hot dog would still not be a sandwich even if made with a banana and vegemite instead of a frank and mustard, and if you disagree, you're free to eat a banana and vegemite hot dog and a banana and vegemite sandwich in order to learn the difference.
posted by flabdablet at 7:00 AM on March 16, 2023 [1 favorite]

but in general if it's not something the eponymous Earl could eat at the gaming table it's not a sandwich and if he could, it generally is.

I think this is the best definition of sandwich, right here.

a sandwich MUST involve two slices of bread with something in between. A bun does not count, nor does a roll.

But buns/rolls are out of bread, right?
posted by jenfullmoon at 11:28 AM on March 16, 2023

Well, let's say we take ham and cheese, and we put it between two pieces of bread. This is a traditional sandwich. Now we cover it in cheese, making it a croque monseiur. Is it still a sandwich? What if we add an egg on top to make it a croque madame?

If I take two pieces of bread, put ham on top, then put on another two pieces of bread, is this a sandwich sandwich?
posted by Comrade_robot at 11:50 AM on March 16, 2023

Back in the 80s I worked for a US firm that got bought by a UK one - we'd go to the local deli for lunch when we had visiting engineers, on purpose we'd keep them busy in line so they couldn't pay attention to the ordering process, leaving them at the front of the line suddenly stuck with choices they'd never before in their lives had to consider like what sort of bread (from a list of choices they'd never seen before), but the question that always floored them was almost existential:

"do you want everything on it?"

after all what on earth is "everything"?
posted by mbo at 11:56 AM on March 16, 2023

"Everything" is very much like "the lot", a term of art often seen in non-chain take-away shops here in Victoria.

The Victorian "plain hamburger" is a fried patty, fried onion, a slice of tinned beetroot, raw tomato, and shredded lettuce between two buttered and toasted half-buns. The menu board will also show prices for additions of cheese, egg, or bacon; if you add all three of those, that's a "hamburger with the lot". The last optional ingredient is a grilled ring of pineapple, and if you add that to a hamburger with the lot, what you have is a "hamburger with the lot and pineapple". And you can have any of the above either "with sauce" or not (tomato sauce, not quite the same thing as ketchup; a bit thinner and less sweet).

You'd be hard pressed to find a Victorian who would refer to any kind of hamburger as a sandwich. Here, a sandwich is a thing made with sliced bread, which rules out hot dogs as well. And no, splitting a hamburger bun in half doesn't count as slicing. Those things they sell at Subway are not sandwiches either, they're salad rolls.

Any take-away shop that will sell you a hamburger will also sell you a steak sandwich, which is essentially a hamburger with a bit of very thin rump steak instead of the patty, and two slices of bread instead of the halved bun. Optional ingredients for a steak sandwich are as for a hamburger.

A sausage taken off the barbecue hotplate and dumped on one slice of bread, with or without the optional tomato sauce and/or hotplate-fried onion and/or cole slaw, is also not a sandwich; that's a "sausage in bread". Sausage sandwiches do exist, but making one involves two slices of bread.

Every now and then one hears talk of "open-faced" sandwiches. Near as I can tell those don't really exist except to be photographed for food porn, so the potential contradiction between open-faced sandwich and sausage-in-bread terminologies remains entirely theoretical.

If you're ever in Lakes Entrance, Footbridge Fish & Chips in Myer Street makes an excellent hamburger with the lot and pineapple with sauce. Guthridge Foods on Guthridge Parade in Sale runs it a very close second.

Closer again to Melbourne, the Yarragon Milk Bar used to offer a variant of the hamburger with the lot and pineapple with sauce built on two generous hamburger patties and a slice of sizzle steak; they called it the House Brick. It's not on the menu any more but they'll still make one if you ask for it by name.
posted by flabdablet at 12:42 PM on March 16, 2023 [2 favorites]

Here in NZ we'd order that as "Deluxe" - hamburger with pineapple, fried egg, bacon, onions, cheese beef patty, lettuce/etc and possibly/traditionally a slice of beetroot
posted by mbo at 1:45 PM on March 16, 2023

Every now and then one hears talk of "open-faced" sandwiches. Near as I can tell those don't really exist except to be photographed for food porn, so the potential contradiction between open-faced sandwich and sausage-in-bread terminologies remains entirely theoretical.

What? Here in the home of open-faced sandwiches, they seem very real. Some people eat them every day. There are fancy restaurants but also little cheap shop-fronts where you get three "unspecified" pieces for a very affordable price.

That said, we don't call them open-faced sandwiches, and I do to some extent feel a sandwich is something you can eat with one hand while playing cards. But it is very complicated. One of the big questions of our age.
posted by mumimor at 2:10 PM on March 16, 2023

"do you want everything on it?"

Subway employees are equally perplexed by that, though they don't really blink if you say every vegetable anymore. Yes, I also want every sauce. Most US places get around 'everything' conundrum by charging for toppings the way pizza places do. Sure, you can get everything on it if you want a $40 hamburger.
posted by The_Vegetables at 2:18 PM on March 16, 2023

The Victorian "plain hamburger" is ... a slice of tinned beetroot ...
I've lived in this country since 1977 and it's only today that I've seen anything sensible come out of Victoria!

But buns/rolls are out of bread, right?
Well, buns are often made from the same ingredients as sliced bread, yes. But it's not the ingredients that matter, it's the form. Bread is bread and buns are buns and rolls are rolls. Sorry, but that's the law.

On the face of it (pun intended), 'open-faced sandwiches' are clearly and obviously not sandwiches because they only have one slice of bread. I have, however, seen a wrinkle that overcomes this. Some years ago, I was perusing the menu (with Instagram-worthy pictures of each dish) of some cafe or something and spotted something amazing. It was an open-faced sandwich that was actually a sandwich! 'How is this possible'? I hear you exclaim! This wonderful piece of rules-lawyering was your usual open-faced non-sandwich, but there was a second piece of toasted bread canted across the corner of it! Now, it only caressed the corner, perhaps overlapping by 20mm or so, but rules is rules and, try as I might to deny it, this was an actual open-faced sandwich! Reader, I bought the sandwich out of respect for the amazing bit of rule-bending and it was delicious!
posted by dg at 4:02 PM on March 16, 2023 [1 favorite]

Beets? On a hamburger?!?!?

I don't know how I feel about that.
posted by JustSayNoDawg at 4:26 PM on March 16, 2023

Here in NZ McDonalds actually offers a burger with beetroot on it ....
posted by mbo at 5:01 PM on March 16, 2023

You can argue about taxonomies all day but all I know is that I'm craving a sandwich now. Thanks a lot, MetaFilter!
posted by treepour at 5:10 PM on March 16, 2023 [1 favorite]

Yup, and a martini!
posted by Greg_Ace at 8:04 PM on March 16, 2023

Tacos are not sandwiches.

The truth of the matter is, sandwiches are just really, really bad tacos.
posted by MrGuilt at 8:40 PM on March 16, 2023

I have to admit I'm confused by some takes that hoagies aren't sandwiches because they're on a roll. They're also called submarine sandwiches!
posted by mollweide at 8:55 PM on March 16, 2023 [2 favorites]

And yet, if you do actually submerge them they taste nowhere near as good. The "submarine sandwich" is a lie. QED.
posted by flabdablet at 11:33 PM on March 16, 2023 [2 favorites]

That depends on what you submerge in. Or is a French dip now not a sandwich, either?
posted by mollweide at 8:29 AM on March 17, 2023 [2 favorites]

Wherein Metafilter gets absolutely roasted by the website owner and her followers on Twitter.
posted by schoolgirl report at 9:38 PM on March 18, 2023 [4 favorites]

There is no better morning coffee than that made from roasting an overthought plate of beans.
posted by flabdablet at 12:54 AM on March 19, 2023 [1 favorite]

Wherein Metafilter gets absolutely roasted by the website owner and her followers on Twitter.

Yeah, y'all really earned it with this one.
posted by ndfine at 8:28 AM on March 19, 2023

I'll admit jokes can be hard online, but this bunch seem particularly humorless.
posted by mumimor at 9:33 AM on March 19, 2023 [1 favorite]

Yeah, it seems like a bunch of people decided to say 'haha look at these idiots' and provided their own examples to prove they are no better than equal in intellectual prowess.
posted by dg at 4:02 PM on March 19, 2023

Wherein Metafilter gets absolutely roasted by the website owner and her followers on Twitter.

Well, yeah, it's like every other thread around here. Perfectly good $19.95 pedantometer and I can't take it anywhere on metafilter dot com.
posted by gentlyepigrams at 8:00 PM on March 19, 2023

If we roast MetaFilter for long enough can we slice it up and put it on a sandwich?
posted by loquacious at 9:55 AM on March 20, 2023 [2 favorites]

A sandwich is leavened bread and filling that can be eaten by hand without utensils. The bread must be initially cooked separately from the filling. Therefore a hot dog is a sandwich and a taco isn't. A taco/burrito is a wrap. If the bread is cooked with the filling then it is a pastry. Of course as with any axiomatic system Godel's Incompleteness Theorem applies and thus there will always be questions regarding the provability that hot dogs are sandwiches, even if they are.
posted by interogative mood at 11:54 AM on March 20, 2023

A sandwich is leavened bread and filling that can be eaten by hand without utensils.

I'm fine with this except leavened seems unnecessary. On the fence about bread.
posted by kingless at 4:43 PM on March 20, 2023

A sandwich is leavened bread and filling that can be eaten by hand without utensils.

Rabbi Hillel would like a word.
posted by gauche at 7:17 AM on March 25, 2023