Cheese-it, the cops!

November 10, 2024 1:06 PM

According to Quinn, once drug cartels and other criminal operators gain a foothold into how a food business operates, they spot other opportunities. “They will infiltrate a legitimate business, take control of its distribution networks and use it to move other illegal items, including stolen food.” For criminal networks, food has other attractions. “They know crimes involving food result in less severe convictions than for importing drugs,” says Quinn, “but they can still make similar amounts of money.” Particularly if it’s a premium cheese. from Why luxury cheese is being targeted by black market criminals [BBC]

Cheesiously

posted by chavenet (21 comments total)

It’s the single most popular cheese in the world!
posted by whatevernot at 1:17 PM on November 10 [6 favorites]

You can make a lot of cheddar, as long as you avoid the boys in blue. Then you can hide it in a Swiss account.
posted by Faint of Butt at 1:22 PM on November 10 [21 favorites]

You can make a lot of cheddar, as long as you avoid the boys in blue. Then you can hide it in a Swiss account.

And there are stiltons more ideas like that to go...
posted by Calvin and the Duplicators at 1:50 PM on November 10 [11 favorites]

Somewhere, in an opulent office, a shadowy figure is telling his subordinates to plug the leaks in their organization if they know what’s Gouda for them. Shaken they leave. The camera tracks back to the desk where the figure turns in the chair and leans forward into the light, revealing wordshore. He is holding a plate of cheese samples and teacakes.

*Ominous music*
posted by GenjiandProust at 1:56 PM on November 10 [7 favorites]

Not 'round here whatevernot...

EDIT: Cheese... So good
posted by Windopaene at 1:57 PM on November 10 [3 favorites]

Reign of Terroir
Rich, powerful and eccentric, Roquefort is still the king of cheeses. But for how much longer?
posted by clavdivs at 2:20 PM on November 10 [4 favorites]

Anything good will likely be infiltrated by crime/ Too much profit...

And while I am not a goat cheese guy. Holy cow/goat no, sheep milk Brebis Cheese. Basque/French cheese. So good. Got a gift one Christmas from Murray's Cheese of this. So good. Have bought a bunch.

Don't do mold, so haven't accepted any Blue Cheese yet.

Would like to try Hillchester. Staggering popular in the Manor's squire
posted by Windopaene at 2:35 PM on November 10 [1 favorite]

The screenplay for a UK adaptation of Breaking Bad is writing itself here
posted by rubatan at 2:58 PM on November 10 [8 favorites]

They also can use legitimate manufacturing and packing facilities to package drugs for smuggling. I work in a crime lab and years back had a case with packages of "milkshake powder" from mexico in various flavors with nutritional labels and all that. They decidedly did not contain milkshake powder.
posted by Captain_Science at 3:00 PM on November 10 [8 favorites]

They decidedly did not contain milkshake powder.

Well, that's one way to bring all the boys to the yard.
posted by notoriety public at 4:25 PM on November 10 [13 favorites]

Cheese it, the cops!!

I'm all in flavor of getting me some black market parm, nevertheless, I'm still waiting for my maple syrup, you people!
posted by BlueHorse at 5:27 PM on November 10 [3 favorites]

Also, stolen...
posted by Windopaene at 6:07 PM on November 10 [1 favorite]

British police have been on the trail of illegal cheese for decades now...
posted by Dysk at 6:25 PM on November 10 [1 favorite]

Some nice cheese you got there. It’d be a pity if someone moved it, wouldn’t it.
posted by TedW at 7:06 PM on November 10 [6 favorites]

Chee-Cheesiously.

I do fonduely remember the aged, organic, grass fed, whole milk, $7.99 a pound New Zealand Cheddar which I ate for 20 years, averaging 4+ lbs./wk. during the last year and a half I was able to consume it.

But all that L-tryptophan seems to have given me eosinophilia myalgia syndrome, and I’ve had to go cheese-free cold Turkey sandwiches ever since.
posted by jamjam at 8:46 PM on November 10 [4 favorites]

There's an organic cheese place near here. Have seen several shady looking types casein the joint.
posted by GallonOfAlan at 11:11 PM on November 10 [5 favorites]

Boy. Everyone has such a whey with words but all i curd do is this cheesy pun.

Course every industry seems to be getting this. Yay capitalism
posted by AngelWuff at 6:10 AM on November 11 [3 favorites]

Is this like the tons of maple syrup stolen several years ago?
posted by Mesaverdian at 4:07 PM on November 11 [1 favorite]

Is this like the tons of maple syrup stolen several years ago?

No, cheese is more solid.
posted by mittens at 6:13 PM on November 11 [5 favorites]

Avocados grown in Mexico are often grown by cartel people now. :(
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 7:22 PM on November 11 [2 favorites]

Sometimes I think the milk used to make that cheese is suckled from the teats of Satan himself. *winks* (content warning: Andy Dick)
posted by polytope subirb enby-of-piano-dice at 1:42 AM on November 12 [1 favorite]