Confessions of a SF Pimp
December 9, 2002 4:40 PM   Subscribe

Everything you ever wanted to know about pimping but were afraid to ask "Money is a motivator. Pimping is perfect for a down-and-out freelance writer. Moreover, I do love danger. Not too much danger though, just enough to keep the nerves popping." A ripping yarn - a San Fransisco treat o< ! (via
posted by KettleBlack (17 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
Earlier MeFi pimp stuff can be found here. The This American Life story gives a different breakdown on the money split between the pimp and the prostitute. According to the pimps interviewed there, the prostitute defers all money to the pimp in return for food, clothes, rent, and protection. I don't know which account is correct, because I'm not a pimp. I just wear the hats.

And from the pimping canon: Iceberg Slim, American Pimp, and Pimps Up, Hoes Down.
posted by samuelad at 5:17 PM on December 9, 2002

i believe the term is actually pimpin'...
posted by grabbingsand at 5:34 PM on December 9, 2002

The young, middle class, white American male's fascination with all things "pimp" is so beyond tired. So stale.

Any productive vein of interest/humor dried out eight years ago. No more pimps... no more.

Last Halloween was my breaking point... every time one of the 50 million "pimps" I met would try to make conversation, I'd call them on their shit. "Hey, man... you're costume is completely and utterly banal... why did you think that would be a good costume?" I encourage everyone to do the same in an effort to stamp out this humorless culture-sucking plague.

(Next installment, I'll tell you why almost all of Barry White's songs completely suck...)
posted by cadastral at 6:15 PM on December 9, 2002

Wow cadastral, you sound like a real fun guy.
posted by HTuttle at 6:26 PM on December 9, 2002

The This American Life audio documentary paints a much rougher picture of pimping, casually alluded to in this article. At least this guy's not talking about how he has to beat down his women. That was a little too graphic to my tastes.
posted by bbrown at 7:02 PM on December 9, 2002

"Hey, man... you're costume is completely and utterly banal... why did you think that would be a good costume?"

My condolences on trying to use the word 'banal' on those that would never know what the word means. And how to pronounce it - it's like the whole wafting/wahhhhfteen thing I get caught up in.

(this reminds me of those over-bored, over-board NJ Guidos)
posted by ao4047 at 7:29 PM on December 9, 2002

The documentary American Pimp is seriously just about the most depressing movie I've ever seen. Yes, the pimps get 100% of the worker's money.
posted by mdn at 7:42 PM on December 9, 2002

"The young, middle class, white American male's fascination with all things "pimp" is so beyond tired."

So for this comment to have relevance it would have to be directed in my direction....frankly I don't like your attitude!! I may be young, middle class white and American, but I've no fascination with pimpery. I think it's an interesting phenomenon and one that we're unlikely to know much about. So there!!!1

posted by KettleBlack at 8:03 PM on December 9, 2002

"Any productive vein of interest/humor dried out eight years ago."

Perhaps this is a productive vein of interest. Or this. Or this.

To suggest that pimp-related links have no place in this forum because the topic became passe for you some time ago overlooks the fact there are women suffering through a daily, unimaginable tragedy in this profession. The links that I cited are, indeed, the heart-wrenching primary documents of the bizarre economic system that has arisen in a black market that will forever have a significant demand.

Furthermore, not everyone participating here is white, middle-class, American, or male. And I would be very interested to hear critical viewpoints from the variety of MeFites who have seen, heard, and read this material. Hopefully, those viewpoints will be a bit richer than, "Oh, that's not cool anymore."
posted by samuelad at 8:56 PM on December 9, 2002

(I remember being moved by the TAL story for days after I heard it on the radio, esp. the hanger beating.) While I'm with KettleBlack and samuelad here, I'd also like to post a strange pimp link I found a long time ago when I was looking online for cheap couches: Check out the furniture they put in their big pimp houses (possibly nsfw as there's one bikini babe photo up top -- fully clothed, though -- click on "furniture/spas" on the left menu and then check out the couches). For a glimpse of a pimp's lifestyle, stop in at the same site for their "Pimp of the Month" column. (Click "pimp of the month" in left hand column, and then go to the right to "view past pimps.") My favorite there is Jon, who says that "Plenty of ladies want a piece of an honest pimp, if you bullshit them, you'll eventually get it back 10 fold." Classy guy. Not as classy as some of the others on the site like Stan, whose advice is to "Hit 'em all" or one of the other guys whose pick up line is "What's up Hoe," but still pretty damn classy. And gee, they have really nice cars.

It's a crazy site, and frightening. Also I think rather funny, even if that's a little passe.
posted by onlyconnect at 9:09 PM on December 9, 2002

I can't see much difference between the furniture on and the furniture in Anna Nicole Smith's house.

More importantly, thank you for the links, Samuelad. None of the sex workers I know would ever have a pimp, and sometimes i forget that the prostitution world is really many very different worlds, and can be an incredibly dangerous and brutal profession for people who work the streets and strip clubs without support.
posted by RJ Reynolds at 10:17 PM on December 9, 2002

cadastral:"25 year old cartographer/pugilist/social theorist."

I dunno, you look white and middle-class to me, bud. Please spin us some heroic boxing tales, deliver us from madness with your breakthrough social theories and realize what is really stale- overstating your importance paired with the gamour shot on your web page.
posted by ttrendel at 11:11 PM on December 9, 2002

And for anyone who is wondering, gamour means glamour in ttrendel-ese. So there. It's like pig-latin but for the super-smart. Miguel will back me up on this one.
posted by ttrendel at 11:17 PM on December 9, 2002

I just realized I know the worthless fuck who scraped that piece together: a shambling, useless, brokedick skeezer who used to try to sell his "pieces" to the magazine my ex-wife and I ran in Seattle.

Sad to see the Chron supporting his speed habit.
posted by adamgreenfield at 11:38 PM on December 9, 2002


posted by jimmy at 11:55 PM on December 9, 2002

Is "pimpin'" really that interesting to American suburbanite teens? If so, why? We can't blame all of it on Sinfest can we?

Jimmy: I miss Settle's particularly entertaining brand of insanity... Notice how he made 666 comments and then stopped. I'm just sayin'....
posted by dmt at 5:12 AM on December 10, 2002

Here's something I said on IRC once...

[16:55] [ed \work] i'd have this as my quit message if it'd fit ----> i find it very, very strange that a man who beats, exploits and occasionally rapes women who have been addled by years of drug abuse and/or sexual transmitted infection is held in such high regard with middle class males as old as 30.
posted by ed\26h at 8:28 AM on December 10, 2002

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