Sophisticated terrorism?

March 31, 2003 12:11 AM

Osama's niece wants to be a Western pop star. No, really.
posted by magullo (15 comments total)

It's quite apparent that this branch of the family has nothing to do with uncle Osama - why should she suffer?
posted by viama at 12:26 AM on March 31, 2003

The perfect punishment for bin Laden (if he's still alive and is caught) would be for him to be forced to listen to his own niece's pop music on an endless loop. Jihad vs. McWorld indeed!
posted by homunculus at 12:46 AM on March 31, 2003

2 points...
(1) Why can i not find a single picture of the girl on google or in any news stories?
(2) Which Western recording studio is going to risk putting the girl on their books, especially under her real name?

Personally I agree with viama, but does the world in general? Is any recording company brave enough to risk it?
posted by twine42 at 2:26 AM on March 31, 2003

Maybe Osama can produce her records... Collaborate with her on his next jihad-fetish tape he releases from the caves.

Of course, this girl *wants* to be a pop-star. None of these articles said anything about her skills, or dedication, or that she was even currently performing. Lots of people *want* to be stars.
posted by jdaura at 2:41 AM on March 31, 2003

Osama has 54 brothers and sisters, and has spawned about(?) 50 children. Surely the odds are leaning in favor of the next Dorothy Hamill bin Laden.
posted by hama7 at 3:25 AM on March 31, 2003

twine42, I've seen pics of her in the Evening Standard, and she's quite foxy.
posted by viama at 3:29 AM on March 31, 2003

I've seen pics of her in the Evening Standard, and she's quite foxy.

Scan em in then!
posted by ed\26h at 4:14 AM on March 31, 2003

posted by viama at 4:48 AM on March 31, 2003

She should get together with the Bush twins and the Dixie Chicks for a recording!
posted by zaelic at 5:13 AM on March 31, 2003

I was about to say "the tabloid will jump on this", but viama launched a preemptive image on me . I'm going to look for some mp3 sample of her and see if she has got a voice or she's just the last product of tabloids.
posted by elpapacito at 5:52 AM on March 31, 2003

posted by quonsar at 5:58 AM on March 31, 2003

Yo, the girl rejected Harvard Law School in favor of Columbia. She's not just some vapid freak. I would fear for her if she ever did perform in this country. It sucks that the Sun (in viama's picture) didn't even respect her desire to have her name spelled in the Western style to distinguish her from her estranged family.
posted by grrarrgh00 at 8:12 AM on March 31, 2003

thats comedy gold
posted by clavdivs at 8:52 AM on March 31, 2003

I betcha Justin Timberlake would Sportfuck her.
posted by ColdChef at 9:18 PM on March 31, 2003

"Last week she joined stars including Rod Stewart, Natalie Imbruglia and Phil Collins at a charity function hosted by Garrards,"

Wow, she's off to a great start.......
posted by brendoman at 6:38 PM on April 4, 2003