Happy Loyalty Day!
May 1, 2003 2:09 PM   Subscribe

Happy Loyalty Day, Everyone!
posted by Yelling At Nothing (32 comments total)
Patriotism is bunk. I say that today, and I'll say it when I'm elected.
posted by Pretty_Generic at 2:19 PM on May 1, 2003

oh my dear sweet baby jebus, they do think we're little kids, don't they?
posted by Ufez Jones at 2:19 PM on May 1, 2003

"Our citizens are bound by ideals that represent the hope of all mankind: that all men are created equal..."

posted by mr_crash_davis at 2:20 PM on May 1, 2003

This was first officially made a national day of observance on May 1 in 1958 by Eisenhower. A re-branding effort, if you will. We couldn't go around celebrating the same holidays as the Red Menace, now could we?
posted by pitchblende at 2:26 PM on May 1, 2003

"I call upon all the people of the United States to join in support of this national observance. I also call upon government officials to display the flag of the United States on all government buildings on Loyalty Day."

What, that's the best he can think up? No burning effigies? No ratting out your neighbors or slandering dissidents?

Nope, just another day that doesn't involve a bacchanalian orgy.

posted by cratchit at 2:27 PM on May 1, 2003

Our children need to know that our Nation is a force for good in the world, extending hope and freedom to others.

We're a force alright. I hope George will understand that I intend to express my extreme loyalty to the Nation next November, by voting to kick his sorry ass out of office (with extreme prejudice and malice of forethought).
posted by Wulfgar! at 2:30 PM on May 1, 2003

Coincidence that they chose May 1, right? Fnord.
posted by Ereneta at 2:34 PM on May 1, 2003

I'm hoping someone will volunteer to drive so I can stick my bare ass out the car window all over town each Loyalty Day.
posted by argybarg at 2:37 PM on May 1, 2003

Their service and sacrifice are a testament to their love for America, and our soldiers' honor on and off the battlefield reaffirms our Nation's most deeply held beliefs: that every life counts, and that all humans have an unalienable right to live as free people.

"We understood freedom by making demonstrations," Alesawi said. "But the shooting that greeted us was not freedom. Are there two types of freedom, one for you and one for us?"

Say, what's with all this Teutonic capitalization of "Nation"? (I guess we should just be glad the proclamation didn't refer to either "Motherland", "Fatherland", or even "Homeland").

Now I'm off to get another Flag decal for my SUV...and some Freedom Fries to celebrate on Loyalty Day in Our Nation. Let's roll.
posted by fold_and_mutilate at 2:40 PM on May 1, 2003

Yeah Pitchblende, rebranding is where it's at. I think he call it called it LAW DAY. And in 1961 Congress designated May 1 as the official date for Law Day by joint resolution.
For you youngsters who may never have heard about the association of worker's rights with the first of May, here's some history.
posted by ahimsakid at 2:41 PM on May 1, 2003

Now was that loyalty to the constitution or loyalty to the government? They're not usually the same thing.
posted by ZenMasterThis at 2:43 PM on May 1, 2003

Say, what's with all this Teutonic capitalization ...

Hey, watch what you say about us Teutons ... we are at our core a joyful people ...
posted by ZenMasterThis at 2:44 PM on May 1, 2003

Oh, and Regan also made the proclamation:
"The day after his administration announced it would not recognize the World Court's jurisdiction over the U.S. mining of Nicaraguan harbors (which violated international law), President Reagan proclaims May 1 as "Law Day USA". "Without law," says the President, "there can be no freedom, only chaos and disorder."

Hmmmmm . . .sounds familiar
posted by ahimsakid at 2:44 PM on May 1, 2003

Hey, foldy, quit hoggin' the ketchup. And pass me another Budweiser. By God, we got us some Loyalty to celebrate!
posted by Wulfgar! at 2:57 PM on May 1, 2003

I know - let's celebrate with a sing-a-long!
posted by madamjujujive at 3:06 PM on May 1, 2003

Do you think the shrub knows that it's Beltane for us Wiccans?
posted by nyxxxx at 3:45 PM on May 1, 2003

Isn't this just another attempt by Christians to capitalize on a holiday revered by those heathen pagans?
posted by mnology at 3:49 PM on May 1, 2003

I know - let's celebrate with a sing-a-long!

Or a lo-fi trolling wreckstep freakout!
posted by eddydamascene at 3:52 PM on May 1, 2003

Okay, nyxxxx and mnology, you two are creepin' me out. Are you sure your loyal? You are patriots, aren't you?
posted by Wulfgar! at 3:56 PM on May 1, 2003

At least we've finally got something to celebrate with the rest of this world this way!
posted by Birichini at 4:21 PM on May 1, 2003

I find it somewhat appropriate I find myself in Paris on Loyalty Day.
posted by birdherder at 6:21 PM on May 1, 2003

After reading this crap, all that I can say is "JA! Mein Fuehrer!"

Du vill be loyal, or du vill be shot!
posted by drstrangelove at 7:04 PM on May 1, 2003

Loyalty Day?
Why not go all the way and call it "Obedience Day"?
posted by spazzm at 7:47 PM on May 1, 2003

I'll observe Obedience Day if they make it J-Loyalty Day.
posted by billder at 9:09 PM on May 1, 2003

I turned in my neighbour as a thought criminal today.
posted by tpoh.org at 9:29 PM on May 1, 2003

Is there a Loyalty Oath too?
posted by maggie at 2:30 AM on May 2, 2003

posted by dg at 5:06 AM on May 2, 2003

Sounds double plus good!
posted by RavinDave at 5:53 AM on May 2, 2003

You know, like, loyalty to one's country is like, you know, soooooooooo 1776. Like, gimme a break, you know, I've never been 100% loyal to anything, now suddenly I'm supposed to be 100% loyal to the whole damn country? Like, what am I, twelve years old?

I mean really, there's like forty-two white kids in Georgia who won't dance with the black kids, and this country is supposed to stand for equality? Yeah, right! Do they think I'm a moron?

And what about this! Some Iraqis fired guns at US soldiers, and do you know what? Those soldiers actually took out their guns and fired back! Like, totally, what is this, Hitler part II, electric boogaloo? That's not any freedom I ever heard of.

Like just last week, I was at this war protest, right, and all these cops were lined up like it was gestapo day at the park, and so i took out my gun and shot at them, because like, that's my freedom, you know, I'm an American, and I told them, don't even think about shooting back at me, what do you think I am, an Iraqi or something, you must be confused, mr nazi, there's two types of freedom, you know, one for us and one for them.

So, thank you very much, I'll take my extra-special freedom and I'll shoot at cops and I'll have my own dance but what I won't do is say that I'm loyal, because I'm anything but, mister.
posted by David Dark at 9:05 AM on May 2, 2003

David Dark, have you gone nuts? Seriously? I mean, a troll post is a troll post, but the "traitor Valley Girl" thing's a bit over the top, especially with the ridiculous strawmen you're posting.
posted by FormlessOne at 10:38 AM on May 2, 2003

strawmen, yes, ridiculous, yes, my arguments, no. I borrowed them from comments above, here and here, in order to poke fun. I am a little nuts, but no more than usual, I'd say.
posted by David Dark at 11:56 AM on May 2, 2003

You know, like, loyalty to one's country is like, you know, soooooooooo 1776.

1776 was all about treason and seditious acts. The word "loyalty" is conspicuously absent from the text of the Constitution. The pledge of allegiance was not recognized by Congress until 1942. Loyalty oaths are sooooooooo 1950.
posted by eddydamascene at 3:44 PM on May 2, 2003

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