Manscaping! Another word brought to you by Queer Eye.
August 26, 2003 5:50 PM   Subscribe

It's Dinner Time. You know what that means: Hairy chests. [geisha asobi poss. nsfw] Mmmmmm... I'm salivating like Pavlov's dog just looking at it! What's that? You're in the mood for hairy backs? [e.blort] Why, Bill Cosby from Ghost Dad would be proud! (Whoever else has seen that movie gets a free... flowbee.)
posted by Stan Chin (28 comments total)
And I can't wait until some pretty girl I'm dating googles this post from me and runs away screaming! To mystery girl in the future, I offer you this quote:

Tanaka: "I suppose you know what it is about you that fascinates them.... it's the hair on your chest. Japanese men have only beautiful bare skin."
Bond: "Japanese proverb says: "bird never make nest in bare tree."

Wait, that doesn't make it any better. *sigh* I'll buy dinner.
posted by Stan Chin at 5:55 PM on August 26, 2003

Why are the Japanese so damn weird?
posted by solistrato at 6:07 PM on August 26, 2003

Words fail me.
posted by ursus_comiter at 6:08 PM on August 26, 2003

flo chops?
posted by Space Coyote at 6:23 PM on August 26, 2003

Hairy Asian men are the hottest.

posted by WolfDaddy at 6:27 PM on August 26, 2003

japs have pubes?
posted by quonsar at 6:27 PM on August 26, 2003

Can someone who reads of the Japanese tell me about the agenda of the first site linked to in the FPP?

Is it "Hey, guys, show us your chest hair!" or "Look at guys with sexy chest hair!"

Just interested.
posted by Sidhedevil at 6:36 PM on August 26, 2003

Good Lord, Stan, I didn't think you were actually going to do it.
posted by Johnny Assay at 6:42 PM on August 26, 2003

I've seen both Ghost Dad and Leonard Part 6. I'm so ashamed.
posted by mmoncur at 6:53 PM on August 26, 2003

Well, Johnny, according to my front page, there is no post for the 23rd. Missed it by two minutes. Be sure to make note of that wherever the official records of Stan's attempt are kept.

posted by mr_crash_davis at 6:54 PM on August 26, 2003

Yeah, Stan, whatever happened to that leaving Metafilter and getting yourself a blog and not being funny thing?

And exactly how many previous posts are you referencing in this FPP? Are you going for some kind of record? Is the hairy backs thing a reference to Jerry Lewis greasing his back hair?

Just curious.
posted by soyjoy at 6:57 PM on August 26, 2003


Someone on your MeFi thread about the chest hair site was wondering what
the translation was. Despite being a long-term MeFi watcher, since
signups are closed, I'm locked out of commenting, and he didn't have an
email address in his profile, so I'm going to send it to you.

Title: Chest Hair Contest

Top: Warning! This page has visual depictions concerning men's chest
hair, etc., and may impart an unpleasant feeling.

Bottom: Reader submissions!! To submit an image, please include 3
pictures, your age, height, weight, comments, and address so that we can
see how you fare.

They're rather loose translations. I'm not really sure about the end of
the bottom line (I've only been studying for two years and we haven't
learned that particular construction yet) but it seems fairly
reasonable. Hooray for Jim Breen's edict.

Tim Smith /
posted by Stan Chin at 7:13 PM on August 26, 2003

"free flowbee"? surely you're not referring to the fabulous Flowbee Precision Home Vacuum Haircut System, the one and only Flowbee hair cut, no other vacuum haircutting sytem compairs [sic] ??? why, i'd shave my back for a genuine Flowbee, with 950 max Watts of suction!
posted by quonsar at 7:33 PM on August 26, 2003

Thanks, Tim Smith. Knowing it's a "chest hair contest" and not some kind of porn site for Japanese bear-lovers does, in fact, change my response...

BTW, I'm a lady.

"may impart an unpleasant feeling"--is that in the passive construction meant to imply annoyance?
posted by Sidhedevil at 7:37 PM on August 26, 2003

"may impart an unpleasant feeling"--is that in the passive construction meant to imply annoyance?

more likely it is the passionate construction meant to imply "may presage raging boner".
posted by quonsar at 7:44 PM on August 26, 2003

Well, nausea is an unpleasant feeling.
posted by stoneegg21 at 7:46 PM on August 26, 2003

Bears? I don't think these guys are bears. Even if they were, the whole thing is ruined with those headless photos. Nothing debonerizes me faster than pics with the heads cut off. Feh.
posted by ursus_comiter at 7:48 PM on August 26, 2003

So when does the fetishisation of the moustache begin? Or has it already begun? I ask because, having recently shaved off my month-old 'stache--more or less because it got more attention than I did--my cow orkers actually started up a petition to get me to re-grow it. The mind boggles.

P.S. I find it hard to believe something known as "Manscaping" isn't an obscure form of pornography.

P.P.S. ObscureBillCosbyMovieFilter
posted by arto at 8:35 PM on August 26, 2003

Stan, why do you hate Metafilter?
posted by jpoulos at 9:24 PM on August 26, 2003

arto - I'm sure it was just a typo, but "my cow orkers" is an awesome phrase, it calls to mind a team of people that you have in your employ, strictly for the purpose of bovine orking.
posted by jonson at 10:47 PM on August 26, 2003

jonson - I don't think it was a typo. Although for some reason it is the last of my top 3 most hated tying affectations (the others being: teh and pr0n).
posted by willnot at 11:18 PM on August 26, 2003

So when does the fetishisation of the moustache begin? Or has it already begun?

Maybe I'll grow my 'stache from college back. I live in the outer boroughs of New York City now. I'll fit in just fine.
posted by jonmc at 6:33 AM on August 27, 2003

Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. But interesting.
posted by gottabefunky at 7:56 AM on August 27, 2003

willnot, wait until the first issue of my new 'zine comes out: Teh Cow Orker Pr0n, vol. 1 is sure to be a cult classic.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 8:05 AM on August 27, 2003

What timing. Wordsmith's word of the day yesterday was:

dasypygal (da-si-PYE-gul) adjective
Having hairy buttocks.
[From Greek dasy- (hairy, dense) + pyge (buttocks).]

Fortunately, I have no pictures.
posted by stefanie at 8:23 AM on August 27, 2003

willnot -
my number one most hated *tying* affectation is throwing a bight instead of a loop.

*snort* I kill me.
posted by notsnot at 9:01 AM on August 27, 2003

[tangential] I once was involved with a Greek man... he had hairy earlobes. And hairy toes. Not to mention the rest. [/tangential]

Men of Mefi: Please do not grow mustaches. Grow goatees, grow beards, but do not grow mustaches. Ugh.

Thank you for your consideration.
posted by jokeefe at 10:17 AM on August 27, 2003

I *heart* you Stan, you cute little bundle of wacky goodness, you.
posted by echolalia67 at 4:02 PM on August 27, 2003

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