And now what?
August 28, 2003 3:19 PM   Subscribe

Last words of fictional characters. [cached]
posted by Ljubljana (23 comments total)
Agamemnon and Roy Batty, together at last.

Too bad the site's already farked--and the cache is only A-B.
posted by muckster at 3:32 PM on August 28, 2003

muckster, each letter of the 'cached' link points to a different section.
posted by dutchbint at 3:38 PM on August 28, 2003

It goes without saying that massive spoilers are to be expected.

My favorite fictional last words:
"Am I dying, Brown?". But no one has ever watched that movie, so it's probably not important.
posted by 111 at 3:39 PM on August 28, 2003

Have another look at that cached link. Finally, a useful y2karlisation.
posted by fvw at 3:40 PM on August 28, 2003

Bernie: Look into your heart! Look into your heart!

Tom: What heart?
posted by gwint at 3:46 PM on August 28, 2003

Ah. Way too clever for me. (But, it must be said, y2k would have added title tags!)
posted by muckster at 3:48 PM on August 28, 2003

"Miller, Captain John (actor - Tom Hanks)
"Earned it."
Movie: Saving Private Ryan, 1998"

I always thought he said "Earn this."
Of course, "earned it" would have been less of an asshole thing to say...
posted by Uncle Ira at 4:11 PM on August 28, 2003

Very sincerely yours,

posted by clavdivs at 4:47 PM on August 28, 2003

ERIPHYLE (within): O, I am smitten with a hatchet's jaw;
And that in deed and not in word alone.
CHORUS: I thought I heard a sound within the house
Unlike the voice of one that jumps for joy.
ERIPHYLE: He splits my skull, not in a friendly way,
Once more: he purposes to kill me dead.
CHORUS: I would not be reputed rash, but yet
I doubt if all be gay within the house.
ERIPHYLE: O! O! another stroke! that makes the third.
He stabs me to the heart against my wish.
CHORUS: If that be so, thy state of health is poor;
But thine arithmetic is quite correct.

A. E. Housman, "Fragment of a Greek Tragedy"
posted by thomas j wise at 5:09 PM on August 28, 2003

You know, I'm pretty sure it IS "earn this" in Saving Private Ryan.
posted by jonson at 5:17 PM on August 28, 2003

What, no last words for James T. Kirk? Well, hardly surprising, really, considering how badly the thing was botched.
posted by kaemaril at 5:22 PM on August 28, 2003

Sherlock Holmes didn't actually die in The Final Problem" -- he returned later and had several more adventures.

"I had little doubt that I had come to the end of
my career when I perceived the somewhat sinister figure of the late Professor Moriarty standing upon the narrow pathway which led to safety. I read an inexorable purpose in his gray eyes. I exchanged some remarks with him, therefore, and obtained his courteous permission to write the short note which you afterwards received. I left it with my cigarette-box and my stick, and I walked along the pathway, Moriarty still at my heels. When I reached the end I stood at bay. He drew no weapon, but he rushed at me and threw his long arms around me. He knew that his own game was up, and was only anxious to revenge himself upon me. We tottered together upon the brink of the fall. I have some knowledge, however, of baritsu, or the Japanese system of wrestling, which has more than once been very useful to me. I slipped through his grip, and he with a horrible scream kicked madly for a few seconds, and clawed the air with both his hands. But for all his efforts he could not get his balance, and over he went. With my face over the brink, I saw him fall for a long way. Then he struck a rock, bounded off, and splashed into the water."
posted by CrunchyFrog at 5:45 PM on August 28, 2003

I prefer the last words of Queen Dido from the Purcell opera:

Thy hand, Belinda, darkness shades me;
On thy bosom let me rest.
More I would, but death invades me:
Death is now a welcome guest.
When I am laid in earth,
May my wrongs create
No trouble in thy breast.
Remember me, but ah! forget my fate.

Here's a recording
posted by CrunchyFrog at 5:57 PM on August 28, 2003

i know that crunchyfrog.

that is why i picked Holmes because he wrote his supposed last words. hey, he needed Watson to think the jig was up so he could chase Col. Moran and Ms' other henchman.
posted by clavdivs at 6:02 PM on August 28, 2003

"I drank what?"


sorry...couldn't resist.
posted by jeribus at 12:27 AM on August 29, 2003

Chipping, Charles "Mr. Chips" (actor - Robert Donat):

What, what was that you were saying about me? . . . I thought I heard you say it was a pity. . . . A pity I never had children? But you're wrong. . . . I have thousands of them . . . thousands of them . . . and all boys!

No wonder he didn't manage to have children; that would have meant dealing with the girls, at least a little bit.

Great, great post, Ljubljana; bravo!!
posted by taz at 4:43 AM on August 29, 2003

"Hey, I can see my house from here!"
-- Jesus Christ
posted by jpburns at 1:01 PM on August 29, 2003

I always thought it was, "More nails, I'm slipping!"
posted by muckster at 2:56 PM on August 29, 2003

I've heard they're working on a movie biography of Johann Sebastian Bach, where his last words are "I'll be Schwarzeneggar!"
posted by wendell at 12:35 AM on August 30, 2003

I recall that cult sci-fi hit Babylon 5, where Captain Sheridan's tearful final words are: "They hired Gary Cole for the spin-off?"
posted by wendell at 12:39 AM on August 30, 2003

Or Janet Leigh's character in "Psycho", who, moments before screaming incoherently, said "Would it kill somebody to have a little more hot water?"
posted by wendell at 12:45 AM on August 30, 2003

Kinda wishing that Douglas Adams' real-life last words had been "So Long and Thanks for All the Fish"

now, I'm derailing myself
posted by wendell at 1:04 AM on August 30, 2003

Janet Leigh:
Pass the towel would you?
posted by carfilhiot at 12:12 PM on September 2, 2003

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