Bonsai Potato

September 21, 2003 4:53 PM

Bonsai Potato is "the art of nurturing the artistic vision of a potato through various forms of encouragement and manipulation."
posted by mr_crash_davis (9 comments total)

NOTE: Your privacy is very important to us. If you contact us we will not divulge your personal information to anyone for any reason. (Unless, of course, it turns out to be extremely lucrative to do so.)

Wow, honesty and art at the same time.
posted by dg at 5:21 PM on September 21, 2003

Okay, I'll say it: Cruelty to potatoes!
posted by Shane at 5:33 PM on September 21, 2003

I use aluminum foil and a barbecue to nurture the artistic vision of a potato. I find that butter and some fresh herbs finishes the work of art.
posted by substrate at 5:57 PM on September 21, 2003

"Zen -- without the wait!" is a great tagline.
posted by planetkyoto at 7:00 PM on September 21, 2003

When shopping for your potato it is best to patronize a 24-hour grocery story in the late evening to avoid distracting crowds. This will give you ample "alone time" to browse the potato bins.

The last time I insisted on being alone with the potatoes they threw me out of the store. Such are the trials of achieving Buddha-nature.
posted by Johnny Assay at 8:20 PM on September 21, 2003

Hah! Questions that are answered in the FAQ include:

What is the average lifespan of a non-organic #2 Russet potato?
How can I maintain aesthetic balance in a multi-variety arrangement dominated by a mono-planar asymmetrical alternating branch stalk?
What in the Hell are you people thinking?!
Why does my potato stink?

Additionally, the FAQ answers that last question with the following: "Most potatoes, unlike people, will go through their entire lifespan without smelling or attracting bugs. . . . If a potato has started to express a particularly 'creative' odor then you have what is referred to as an 'evil potato'. You should emotionally detach and dispose of it immediately before it corrupts any other potatoes in your growing environment." Thanks for the wonderfully silly link, mr crash.
posted by onlyconnect at 8:27 PM on September 21, 2003

No one around here undertands my potato.

Guess I'm just a spud boy, looking for that real tomato.
posted by SPrintF at 8:46 PM on September 21, 2003

i don't have the time, i'm already taking care of a origami paper boulder.
posted by eatdonuts at 11:32 AM on September 22, 2003

Bonsai Potato is alot more above board than the old spoof Bonsai Kitty site.
But I think I'll stick with my junipers, cotoneasters and pyracanthas.

Has anyone ever given a shot to growing live redwood burls? They're hard to get except by mail order or living in Northern California but they're super cool and you can actually propogate a full on redwood.
posted by fenriq at 12:29 PM on September 23, 2003