Like Barbie, but meaner
October 24, 2003 11:19 AM   Subscribe

 
It doesn't even look like her.
posted by tomplus2 at 11:31 AM on October 24, 2003


If the sun's out on Christmas and I get one of those in my stocking, I'm gonna take a magnifying glass and melt Ann's face.
posted by dhoyt at 11:42 AM on October 24, 2003


Why not go to war just for oil? We need oil. What do Hollywood celebrities imagine fuels their private jets? How do they think their cocaine is delivered to them?"

It sure sounds like her, though.
posted by Durwood at 11:43 AM on October 24, 2003


... oh my god, it talks.

where's the Bill O'Reilly & Terry Gross mudslinging playset?

can we ask The Nation to make a Michael Moore talking doll, too?
posted by bl1nk at 11:43 AM on October 24, 2003


or a rush limbaugh with pill-popping swing arm?
posted by amberglow at 11:52 AM on October 24, 2003


Someone needs to swap their voice boxes with the ones from Cobra Commander dolls.

[pull string:]

"GAAAAHHH!! Dessssssstroy them!"
posted by scarabic at 12:00 PM on October 24, 2003


You can get the Rumsfeld one as well and make some stop-motion Conserva-kink.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:03 PM on October 24, 2003


Does it have any...y'know...working orifices?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 12:04 PM on October 24, 2003


This site is selling the doll and has the audio samples of her quotes. It sounds like her.
posted by stevis at 12:46 PM on October 24, 2003


It could go on my desk right next to my George Bush bobblehead doll.

I just ol' Shrub had a voice box in there so I could listen to his rhetoric.

Does someone make a pill popping, rant spewing Rush Limbaugh doll yet? Oh damn, amberglow beat me to it! Hahaha.
posted by fenriq at 12:47 PM on October 24, 2003


I know I had decided upon the philosophical compass to guide my moral life by the time I was in my early teens; what, with all that Nietzsche I read in elementary school, and all the political history I was into.

Did I mention my philosophical compass involves touching a girl's breast, like, under the shirt, and buying a car that's really loud? It's a good thing I figured that stuff out early.
posted by The God Complex at 1:11 PM on October 24, 2003


Let's see. A homely, plastic, packaged cretin, spouting complete horseshit every time some imbecile conservative pays for her, and pulls her string.

So confusing. How would we possibly tell that's just a doll, and not the real Ann Coulter?
posted by fold_and_mutilate at 1:13 PM on October 24, 2003


Careful, folks: Steve only posted this as a way to generate samples to put in the mouth of his Talking Leftie doll.

Come on, Steve, spill it.
posted by soyjoy at 1:17 PM on October 24, 2003


Exacting in detail and fully equipped with authentic gear, this limited-edition action figure is a meticulous 1:6 scale recreation of the Commander-in-Chief's appearance during his historic Aircraft Carrier landing. On May 1, 2003, President Bush landed on the USS Abraham Lincoln (CVN-72) in the Pacific Ocean, and officially declared the end to major combat in Iraq. While at the controls of an S-3B Viking aircraft from the ''Blue Sea Wolves'' of Sea Control Squadron Three Five (VS-35), designated ''Navy 1'', he overflew the carrier before handing it over to the pilot for landing. attired in full naval aviator flight equipment, the president then took the salute the deck of the carrier.

And here's the I-Forget-Exactly-How-Many-Dead-American-Servicmen-And-Servicewomen-Ago Mission Accomplished Ken to Ann's Barbie. Also comes in A.W.O.L. Texas Air National Guard Chickenhawk Khaki.
posted by y2karl at 1:19 PM on October 24, 2003


A pity one of her most famous quotes didn't make it into the doll:

We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity.

Wonder why...
posted by Triplanetary at 1:25 PM on October 24, 2003


Uh, maybe I'm way off base here, but I don't think Steve is trying to troll here. I don't know about you guys but, "Like Barbie, but meaner" kind of says that to me.

Ann Coulter is the right's version of the "Spartcus Youth League" condensed into one emaciated, very looney, person.
posted by echolalia67 at 1:28 PM on October 24, 2003


Is the vagina dentata included or does that cost extra?
posted by jonmc at 1:32 PM on October 24, 2003


Does the Coulter doll come with its own replica SS uniform?
posted by xmutex at 1:34 PM on October 24, 2003


Well, on the bright side, at least they're capitalizing Liberal.
posted by DenOfSizer at 1:35 PM on October 24, 2003


Does it have any...y'know...working orifices?

Unfortunately, just the yapping mouth.
posted by milovoo at 1:37 PM on October 24, 2003


This isn't a troll, it's way too cool! Anyway I love the concept of turning political leaders into action figures. It just feels like a natural progession.

OT: Sometimes I wonder if Michael Moore and Ann Coulter ever get together for drinks and laugh about all schumcks they've made money off by playing politics. I can't help to think that it's all just an act. Someday, perhaps, we'll get real political discourse that rises above the "liberals are traitors" or "Bush equals Hitler" bullshit that does little but sell books, movies and dolls.
posted by elwoodwiles at 1:40 PM on October 24, 2003


I wonder if Michael Moore and Ann Coulter ever get together for drinks

Yeah, but Moore hogs all the appetizers.
posted by jonmc at 1:49 PM on October 24, 2003


Sometimes I wonder if Michael Moore and Ann Coulter ever get together for drinks and laugh about all schumcks they've made money off by playing politics.

Ann Coulter and Bill Maher do just this. They both claim to be long time freinds.
posted by Steve_at_Linnwood at 1:50 PM on October 24, 2003


I can only assume that the doll is flexible enough to realistically stick her head up her own ass.
posted by terrapin at 1:51 PM on October 24, 2003


Careful, folks: Steve only posted this as a way to generate samples to put in the mouth of his Talking Leftie doll.

It has been making it's rounds on the net, saw it on daypop top 40 links this morning. Yet the maker is hard on Clinton.
posted by thomcatspike at 1:53 PM on October 24, 2003


Funny, the doll actually weighs more than Ann herself.
posted by Ty Webb at 2:02 PM on October 24, 2003


hard on Clinton

TCS, you scamp!
posted by soyjoy at 2:15 PM on October 24, 2003


The Bush quotes are pretty lame, considering the possibilities.
posted by inpHilltr8r at 2:48 PM on October 24, 2003


I'm in as long as the doll can quote the infamous sentence that got her sprung from the National Review.

I'll buy one for f_&_m too. And Steve_@, of course.
posted by hama7 at 2:53 PM on October 24, 2003


Ty Webb, you are a funny, funny man.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 3:00 PM on October 24, 2003


the infamous sentence that got her sprung from the National Review

I thought it was,
"we should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity."
but apparently it was,
"Congress could pass a law tomorrow requiring that all aliens from Arabic countries leave....We should require passports to fly domestically. Passports can be forged, but they can also be checked with the home country in case of any suspicious-looking swarthy males."

I almost want to get one just to make animated movies with it, although I think the novelty would wear off pretty quick.
posted by milovoo at 3:13 PM on October 24, 2003


Psstt...
posted by clavdivs at 3:49 PM on October 24, 2003


Psstt...

Awww, she doesn't spew hate or anything. Sheesh, what's the point.
posted by fishbulb at 3:55 PM on October 24, 2003


Interesting. I've always wished that these or these were actually available.
posted by synecdoche at 3:55 PM on October 24, 2003


OUCH!
posted by clavdivs at 4:00 PM on October 24, 2003


Hmm... I wonder why this comes to mind: NSFW [mpg]
posted by scarabic at 4:29 PM on October 24, 2003


Ann Coulter is always(!)on a roll: Bush official caught in church dragnet.

♥♥♥
posted by hama7 at 6:15 PM on October 24, 2003


I want to take more of your money, kill babies, and discriminate on the basis of race.
posted by mcsweetie at 8:46 PM on October 24, 2003


do ya, mcsweet? Have you been dating Ann?
posted by amberglow at 8:48 PM on October 24, 2003


yes! thats why I'm so nuts about gay rights posts. I'm only interested in discriminating on the grounds of race, NOT sexual orientation. get it right or pay the price, budnick!
posted by mcsweetie at 9:09 PM on October 24, 2003


okkk, budnick : o
posted by amberglow at 9:55 PM on October 24, 2003


"In any event, I guess we've come a long way from calling our enemies 'nips' and 'krauts.'"

Nips?
posted by Dick Paris at 11:10 PM on October 24, 2003


"nip" = nippon, one of the big military businesses in japan at the start of wwII (?), their equivalent to, say, raytheon.

(i'm relying on my hazy memories of sophomore year history, and it's 2am. if this is incorrect, please tell me.)
posted by pxe2000 at 11:27 PM on October 24, 2003


"nip" = nippon, one of the big military businesses in japan at the start of wwII

Well, I'm sure there were plenty of companies named "Nippon" something-or-other in Japan just before WWII, just like there are now. After all, it means "Japan."
posted by kindall at 11:57 PM on October 24, 2003


thanks for the correction, kindall. i knew my explanation sounded either incomplete or wrong.
posted by pxe2000 at 6:02 AM on October 25, 2003


What would be really funny is if, once started, she never stopped talking. That would add an element of realism.
posted by bbrown at 8:06 AM on October 25, 2003


I'd get one of these, but I'm afraid I'd break it trying to get those D cells in.
posted by trondant at 10:15 AM on November 1, 2003


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