The Nerd Test
November 13, 2003 6:12 AM   Subscribe

Are You Just A Little Nerdito, A Regular Nerd Or Full-Blown-Ambulance-Case Nerd Well, take the test and find out! (Via LinkFilter. Oh and perhaps someone will kindly take the time to explain to us strangers the nuances that distinguish nerds from wonks, pointy-heads, wusses and geeks?)
posted by MiguelCardoso (38 comments total)

Damn Safari keeps eating the end off my posts! Including the closing tags. Nerds revenge?
posted by MiguelCardoso at 6:14 AM on November 13, 2003

So ... many ... italics
posted by monju_bosatsu at 6:16 AM on November 13, 2003

posted by timyang at 6:20 AM on November 13, 2003

What happens, monju, is that half the times I preview, Safari lops off the end of my post title. So I retype. But even when the preview is fine and I press "Post", it remunches the same end bit. In this case, the italic closing tag went with it. The only words in italics were Nerdito and Nerdíssimo. Browser apologies - unless it's the MeFi server!
posted by MiguelCardoso at 6:20 AM on November 13, 2003

For the love of god, won't someone close the tags!
posted by tr33hggr at 6:25 AM on November 13, 2003

A geek test very similar to the one above did the rounds in our office recently. I was a little disheartened to find that I was still 18% geek, when I'd supposed I'd become less geeky over the years - I guess it's not unlike being Catholic in that respect: once a geek, one can only ever be a lapsed geek thereafter.
posted by misteraitch at 6:26 AM on November 13, 2003

Should I even be able to be 43% Nerd if I haven't programmed a machine since the heady days of Extended Color Computer Basic in 1985 or so? Unless stuff like baby-level R or Maple counts.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 6:30 AM on November 13, 2003

posted by starvingartist at 6:43 AM on November 13, 2003

This web page © 1994.

No kidding.
posted by grabbingsand at 6:45 AM on November 13, 2003

The terms are kinda out of whack, (probably due to the date of the page), but here's more current definitions from google.

Nerd:1. A creature in a Dr. Seuss children's book, If I Ran the Zoo. 2. A socially inept or unattractive person. 3. A person who is more interested in pursuing intellectual interests than in keeping up with trends in fashion. Since the Internet revolution, "nerd" has become a less pejorative term, and "computer nerd" is even used with admiration.

geek:A person who is proficient in one or more technical areas, especially in hands-on utilization of technology. At its most extreme geek implies a total lack of interest, ability, and even awareness of all aspects of life unrelated to technology.

wonk:an insignificant student who is ridiculed as being affected or studying excessively

pointy head: 1 a fool. 2 an intellectual. both terms are derog. and suggest that an excess or an absence of brain lead to a 'pointed' head

wus: a person afraid to act or not up to the task because of fear.
posted by stryder at 6:49 AM on November 13, 2003

Drosphilidae. 41.0% nerd pure, 45% weirdness. I think these numbers are off I thought I was much weirder than that. ;)
posted by dabitch at 6:50 AM on November 13, 2003

It's gonna be real hard times for all of these Grit-eating, Scum-sucking, Boot-licking, Drop-kicking, Gut-grinding, Nail-biting, Glue-sniffing, Scab-picking, Butt-scratching, Egg-hatching, Sleazy, Smelly, Pepper-bellied, Rotten stinking FREAKS!

MetaFilter: Nothing but a PENCIL NECK GEEK.
posted by Smart Dalek at 7:08 AM on November 13, 2003

Was your SAT math score more than 300 points higher than your verbal?

So, since both were in the 700s, I am less of a nerd? Cool! ;-P
posted by mischief at 7:28 AM on November 13, 2003

you have 34.0% nerd in you

Does that mean that 47.6 pound (21.6 kG or 0.023 ton or .0216 mTON) nerdling inside of me?

Wait...I think my inner nerd just grew!
posted by plemeljr at 7:46 AM on November 13, 2003

I like misteraitch's test better. I am less of a geek there.

Don't make me run! I'm all full of chocolate!
posted by Quartermass at 8:01 AM on November 13, 2003

Thanks, stryder! Here's some additional discussion of (policy) wonk.
posted by MiguelCardoso at 8:15 AM on November 13, 2003

"....You answered "yes" to 39 of 100 questions, making you 61.0% nerd pure (39.0% nerd corrupt); that is, you are 61.0% pure in the nerd domain ......Your Weirdness Factor (AKA Uniqueness Factor) is 37%, based on a comparison of your test results with 378675 other submissions for this test.

The average purity for this test is 73.7%"

Crap. I'm an impure nerd.....and if I'd just stuck with trying to program computer combat games in basic (back in 1976, through a teletype terminal hooked to a mainframe) I'd be a millionaire many times over. Oh well.

Do nerds write poetry, read Rilke and Neruda, play improvisational piano, do three-finger picking on acoustic guitar, paint, draw, and cook thai food? Do they ever dance? Do they ever ContraDance?......Can they weld, rebuild motors, true bicycle tires, do plumbing and electrical work, design web pages, or write kickass 15 minute speeches or sermons? Do they use one hemisphere of their brains predominantly or can they use both, as necessary? and does that make me any less of a nerd? toot toot!.......blat blat

Do nerds floss? And if so, what is their most common flossing apparatus of choice?

Oh, and......Is Harvey Pekar a nerd?
posted by troutfishing at 8:27 AM on November 13, 2003

"Is your weight less than your IQ?"

Is that metric or imperial?
posted by spazzm at 8:28 AM on November 13, 2003

"Do your socks mismatch?"

Only a madman would wear socks in this climate.

"[...] 21.6 kG or 0.023 ton [...]"

He's not a real nerd! Get him!

I'm 74% nerd corrupt, with a weirdness factor of 55%.
posted by spazzm at 8:47 AM on November 13, 2003

contradance sounds like fun, trout...but you're still nerdy ; >

And I think Pekar is more of an eccentric or kook, prob.
posted by amberglow at 8:53 AM on November 13, 2003

"Is your weight less than your IQ?"

This one is just wrong. If you weigh 250, it's real damn hard to have an IQ higher than your weight. Or are people like Comic Book Guy something other than a geek or nerd?

Of course, my sitting here criticizing a web-based nerd test on the basis of its accuracy at discriminating nerds from non-nerds... *sigh* just call me Poindexter, or Frink.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:55 AM on November 13, 2003

69.0% nerd pure (31.0% nerd corrupt); that is, you are 69.0% pure in the nerd domain (you have 31.0% nerd in you).
posted by rushmc at 9:21 AM on November 13, 2003

argh, my eeeeeeeeeeeeeeyes are meeeeeeeeeeelting!
posted by triv at 9:24 AM on November 13, 2003

Take notes in multi-color pens? PLEASE.

I take notes in straight TeX.
posted by qDot at 9:25 AM on November 13, 2003

I got the same score as rushmc. How do you wear a calculator or a pencil case anyway?
posted by Orange Goblin at 9:31 AM on November 13, 2003

oddly enough I like the innergeek test better because it makes me geekier .. go fig.
posted by Julnyes at 9:36 AM on November 13, 2003

See... I always figured geeks the opposite way. "Nerds" are the ones without any social skills, who are really into star wars and whatnot. Geeks, on the other hand, have style...
posted by ph00dz at 9:39 AM on November 13, 2003

42% nerd corrupt and 28.79684% Total Geek (I like how the second quiz calculates it out to five decimal points... now that quizmaster is a Geek!)

Other signs you are a Geek:

* You take BOTH the Nerd and Geek tests.

* You explain in detail why you lost your closing tags (including mentioning the non-IE browser you used). Sorry, Migs.

* You have your own blog AND a MetaFilter membership.

* You get your news from or The Daily Show

* You read Ursula K. LeGuin, Popular Science magazine AND Slashdot (who, me?)

* You have never read a book with "...For Dummies" in the title.

BTW, OGob, I thought by "pencil case" he meant "pocket protector"... Is there an international variation for the name of that thing?

BTW, has anyone ever done a MetaFilter Purity Test? (I think I'll take that question to MeTa).
posted by wendell at 9:50 AM on November 13, 2003

A pencil case is something you put your pens, pencils, rulers, calculators, etc in. They're usally plastic/cloth with zips or metal with lids.
posted by Orange Goblin at 12:22 PM on November 13, 2003

How do you wear a calculator or a pencil case anyway?

Velcro tape.
posted by rushmc at 12:28 PM on November 13, 2003

"Are you socially inept?"

It's like they knew me.
posted by tommasz at 12:42 PM on November 13, 2003

How do you wear a calculator or a pencil case anyway?

In style
posted by bshort at 1:02 PM on November 13, 2003

My personal nerd cred: Casio Data Bank wristwatch. These things are the original PDA!

Only 35% nerd though, 'cause the ladies can't resist me.
posted by Down10 at 8:55 PM on November 13, 2003

What if you regret not being able to buy a Texas Instruments CC-40 portable computer on your last thrift store jaunt?

What? No, it's a friend. Uh, Joey Joe Joe Junior Shabadoo.
posted by arto at 11:35 PM on November 13, 2003

That's the worst fake name I've ever heard.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:46 PM on November 13, 2003

misteraitch's test namechecks Jeanine Salla. sweet.
posted by juv3nal at 12:48 AM on November 14, 2003

70% nerd! w00t! How does that square with being popular and sporty though? Hmm..

Still, I beat rushmc and orange goblin so I'll take smug satisfaction in that because I am smug and self-satisfied. jk.

Now to go and redesign my toilet..
posted by Mossy at 2:44 AM on November 20, 2003

Erm.. I just took the geek test..



This is a good thing, right?

Version: 3.12
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O- M V PS+>- PE- Y+ PGP- t+@ 5+@ X R- !tv b++++ DI++++>+ D++@
G++ e>+++++$ h !r !x-

posted by Mossy at 3:02 AM on November 20, 2003

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