Which ones are England?
June 11, 2004 5:34 AM   Subscribe

Football for Dummies With Euro 2004 about to start, the BBC provide a guide for the football-ignorant on how not to embarrass yourself in front of football hooligans fans.
posted by Mwongozi (16 comments total)
Y'know, that's one thing that really, really pisses me right off as an English football supporter - is the automatic assumption that anyone interested in football is a thug and hooligan.
posted by metaxa at 6:05 AM on June 11, 2004

No lip from you hooligan or it's time for a lullaby from Mr. Cudgel.
posted by substrate at 6:08 AM on June 11, 2004

Even as an American football support, I have to agree--although I'm sure Mwongozi meant no offense.

Be modest in your support, like all true England fans
Note: calls of "offside!" are probably best avoided. Even the best linesmen standing there on the pitch rarely get this unfathomable rule right.

I'm not sure I'm catching the subtle sarcasm here, but that's something I don't quite get. It reminds me of the "I can't set my VCR" meme--it's not nearly as ubiquitous as the media claims, but they love to treat it as a universal truism. The rule isn't really that hard. Get over it.
posted by jpoulos at 6:10 AM on June 11, 2004

jpoulus: They do change it a fair bit and Euro2004 is no exception. Expect to see some controversial decisions.
posted by biffa at 6:21 AM on June 11, 2004

Ahh. Return of the Uninformed American! Thanks, biffa.
posted by jpoulos at 6:25 AM on June 11, 2004

Can I get in on this discussion? My dad really, really likes the Green Bay Packers.
posted by item at 6:27 AM on June 11, 2004

As an Irishman I would like to see Engurland do well up until the quarters/semis. At which point I will shout for their opponents ...... Nothing to do with the history between our countries, just a fear that like 1966 we will never hear the end of it!

So good luck for the moment!
posted by kenaman at 6:36 AM on June 11, 2004

I'm ready... so's Vinnie Jones. NSFW
posted by psmealey at 6:38 AM on June 11, 2004

Vinnie Jones is an asshole, and was capped at international level for Wales.

Vinnie was made captain in his sixth international against Holland, which Wales narrowly lost 7-1.
posted by kenaman at 6:56 AM on June 11, 2004

Gazza's balls would agree with you.
posted by psmealey at 7:00 AM on June 11, 2004

Kenaman as a perpetually disappointed england fan I am sure you have nothing to worry about.
posted by johnnyboy at 7:14 AM on June 11, 2004

Vinnie Jones is a charismatic character who captures the hearts of any fans he plays for.

Everyone else thinks he's a twat.
posted by SiW at 7:37 AM on June 11, 2004

In 1988 I helped to defeat the mighty Liverpool at Wembley and picked up The F.A Cup and a winner's medal. I remember this being one of the biggest ever Cup Final upset of resent times.

Didn't play much for QPR because my sight where becoming focused on a new career move that was to be acting.

Over the years I've been lucky to have my mantlepiece.

The admiration of famous people goes for me too. I love to have pictures taken of the people I meet and myself.

I have been involved with a number of works in the printed world

I have always been a fan of the car

The joy of a good tattoo is that they are forever, and I like that.

All the above from vinniejones.co.uk/

Game#3: Fridge Magnet Poetry
What the hell is Vinnie thinking?
Move the magnetic tiles around to make up the sentence you think that Vinnie is thinking.
You can print the page if you come up with anything funny.

Sorry for getting way off topic, I just have never been asked how I feel about him before .... I feel good now... He is a prick.
posted by kenaman at 8:06 AM on June 11, 2004

If you're aiming at football-ignorant people, you might want to call it soccer.
posted by smackfu at 9:25 AM on June 11, 2004

belated post - I too think Vinnie Jones is an ignorant, arrogant, noveau riche, crap-football-playing, even-crappier-acting, self-obsessed, utter prick.

That feels better.
posted by niceness at 5:21 AM on June 12, 2004

Imagine if that had read "blah blah terrorists muslims"

What a sack.
posted by ed\26h at 9:19 AM on June 12, 2004

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