On sale now for only $6.66!!!
March 3, 2005 1:19 PM   Subscribe

Buy a celebrity's soul! For the demon that has everything.
posted by Man O' Straw (14 comments total)
Celebrities have no souls.

There. I got it out of the way.
posted by Cyrano at 1:43 PM on March 3, 2005

Hey, c’mon, you can buy anybody’s soul there. That’s a great deal for only twenty-four bucks. Heck, with a MetaFilter link, they might even make some money out there.
posted by cgc373 at 2:02 PM on March 3, 2005

Not sure I agree that ALL celebrities have no soul, but perusing the list I found myself going:

Billy Zane - no soul
Brad Pitt - no soul
and so on....

Its hard to buy the soul of someone who sold it so long ago.
posted by zia at 2:18 PM on March 3, 2005

Finally, Alyson Hannigan's soul can be mine. As it was so obviously meant to be be. Thank you, universe, for finally living up to those expectations I had of you when you were younger.
posted by Sparx at 2:34 PM on March 3, 2005

This is so stupid ... they must be making a fortune.
posted by R. Mutt at 3:32 PM on March 3, 2005

Humph. I gone n' done this out in the dessert one year.
posted by damehex at 3:43 PM on March 3, 2005

you mean the bono still has a soul?

hmm... i notice sting isn't on the list.

on preview: oh! everybody already stole my joke!
posted by soi-disant at 3:59 PM on March 3, 2005

Dante's souls a la mode?
posted by Eekacat at 4:01 PM on March 3, 2005

If others already have dibs on the souls (be it Mephistopheles, Azrael, Beelzebub or Rupert Murdoch), maybe we should get shares.
posted by Dante5Inferno at 4:57 PM on March 3, 2005

I hate doing stuff in the dessert. Usually means I've knocked something off the kitchen counter in a drunken stupor.
posted by PuppyCat at 5:40 PM on March 3, 2005

How did this guy get all these souls? Methinks I smell a fake.
posted by graventy at 6:18 PM on March 3, 2005

Big ole dusty pie! With sugar frosting and LSD sprinkles.
posted by damehex at 6:30 PM on March 3, 2005

Angelina Jolie's soul for the low, low, low sale price of only $18.99?! Sweet!
posted by deborah at 7:09 PM on March 3, 2005

A number of months ago, after a night of drinking, my friend Casey and I decided to make a run to Taco Bell. Being a product of the 21st Century, he had no cash. I offered to buy him two (2) tacos in exchange for his soul.

I subsequently put his soul for sale on eBay and IM'ed many coworkers and friends to let them in on this great deal. I had a starting price of $2.12 to cover the tacos. Within two days the value of his soul had reached $25 USD... then I got this:

We regret to inform you that your eBay auction:

5520060167 "Casey Hayman's Soul" has been ended. All fees associated with this auction have been credited to your account. The item you have listed does not appear to be consistent with eBay guidelines. eBay does not allow the auctioning of human souls for the following reasons:

If the soul does not exist, eBay could not allow the auctioning of the soul because there would be nothing to sell. However if the soul does exist, then in accordance with eBay's policy on human parts and remains we would not allow the auctioning of human souls. Therefore, we have ended this auction and all fees have been credited to your account.

Undeterred, I tried again. This time you were bidding on a deed to Casey Hayman's soul, not the actual soul. Though I could not guarantee that it would be accepted by the god's of the Eastern or Western peoples, it is my firm conviction that said deities would accept the deed.

I got the letter again and gave up. I did, however, wind up buying a nice Englishman's luck for two pounds after looking around for other souls and metaphysical odds and ends on eBay
posted by trinarian at 9:09 PM on March 3, 2005

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