Hell on wings
July 29, 2005 11:35 AM   Subscribe

Mysteriously knocked up? Does your coffee taste funny? You may be infested with fairies. Let go of your skepticism and realize you have only two choices: beatem or join ‘em.
posted by jrossi4r (13 comments total)
Well, this reminds me...

Many years ago, I worked at [deleted] and my supervisor, a very well built redheaded girl, asked me if I wouldn't bring her back a cup of coffee, since I was on the way to get one for myself.

On the way back from the coffee room, I stopped in the men's room and inserted two drops of my very own urine in her cup.

She fell madly in love!

The moral of this story is... what?
posted by Shouting at 11:53 AM on July 29, 2005 [6 favorites]

One of my roommates leaves offerings for the fairies. I wasn't sure if it was a joke or what until I disturbed it once and got an olde fashioned talkin' to. Yikes.
posted by Skwirl at 11:56 AM on July 29, 2005

The moral of this story is... what?

Never ask Shouting for a cup of coffee.

Topic: I loved the figures in the first three links.
posted by LeeJay at 12:13 PM on July 29, 2005

OK, you've scared me. Are you happy now?
posted by NinjaPirate at 12:15 PM on July 29, 2005

Well NinjaPirate, you can be scared or (NSFW) thrilled, it's really up to you. The sexual side of faeries aside, I really like some of that first artist's work.
posted by gorgor_balabala at 12:34 PM on July 29, 2005

I dig how he always writes “one-of-a-kind (ooak)

Ooak? I love acronyms as much as the next SOB, but ooak?
posted by signal at 1:00 PM on July 29, 2005

Hmm. Some of those "real-life" fairies are kinda pretty. Flakey, but pretty.
posted by Zack_Replica at 1:18 PM on July 29, 2005

Zack, if that's yr thing - check out the Oregon Country Fair next July. Losta prettyflakey there, yo.
posted by black8 at 2:07 PM on July 29, 2005

If you are talking fairies, the greatest, sexiest most sensational fairy novel of all time is "Photographing Fairies." It reads like a combination of P.G. Wodehouse and Vladimir Nabokov, filtered through the sensibility of Arthur Machen (and was shortlisted for the World Fantasy Award when it came out). Anyone with even the remotest interest in this topic needs to read it. There is also a movie version, starring Ben Kingsley, that has its own merits.
posted by shambles at 2:11 PM on July 29, 2005

black8: Actually I'm in Canada (Vancouver) and car-less, so getting there is ...difficult. We've got no shortage of flakes here in Lotus Land, but it's pretty rare that they all dress up as fairies. Mostly they're hippies that reek of patchouli - some pretty, but mostly *ugh*.
posted by Zack_Replica at 2:17 PM on July 29, 2005

Mysteriously knocked up?
I was wondering about that late night humping against my leg by tiny, tiny little people. I thought it was but a dream. . .
posted by mk1gti at 2:33 PM on July 29, 2005

I always have one of my socks inside out. That seems enough to keep 'em away.
It used to be that you had to wear a glove inside out, or if they're on your case, cross running water. Faeries seem to like clean, neat, tidy places to disturb. I keep my areas just over squalor level to keep 'em away.
Unfortunately this keeps away the good ones, too.

My wife is an expert of Faeries, and Fairy tales. We had an infestation once, after a big clean, but with help from the cats, we bagged 'em all.
posted by Balisong at 4:36 PM on July 29, 2005

I keep them away by making sure my natural gas lines are leak free.
posted by TwelveTwo at 1:02 AM on July 30, 2005

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