Oscars moments
March 2, 2006 5:45 PM   Subscribe

The Oscars don't only breed argument about who should have won--but also about the speeches? Were they good? Did they suck? What are the classics? What's Memorable? What's Misquoted? How would your speech go? Would you thank your "makeup man"? Oprah? Complain? Or just go crazy? And here are some more top ones (1,2,3) and another bottom. And Oscar Night bingo in case it all gets to be too much, too boring or too damn long.
posted by FeldBum (17 comments total)
I could only play Oscar Night bingo if I managed to keep my bac low enough to stay awake and coherent through the whole damn thing.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 5:47 PM on March 2, 2006

You can read transcripts of the speeches from the last five years at Oscars.org.
posted by Gator at 5:50 PM on March 2, 2006

I know - here's hoping John Stewart can inject some life into it.
posted by FeldBum at 5:50 PM on March 2, 2006

Nice post!
posted by dougunderscorenelso at 6:22 PM on March 2, 2006

Jon Stewart to the rescue!!!! Yea!!!!! This could be one of the best Oscars yet. (hoping upon hope!)
posted by snsranch at 6:33 PM on March 2, 2006

Time to blow more hot air up the sphincters of already overinflated Hollywood egos.
posted by HTuttle at 6:33 PM on March 2, 2006

God, you're useful.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 6:51 PM on March 2, 2006

I hated that Halle Berry speech, I just wanted her to close her vast gaping maw and stop sobbing (and yeah, I guess she did, eventually). Her Razzies acceptance speech was awesome, though.
posted by The Monkey at 7:07 PM on March 2, 2006

The cringe factor on Oscar night is a lot of fun. That includes the agonizingly awful Halle Berry speech! LOL There's always something completely silly or worth an eye roll to look forward to, a Bjork swan outfit, a Roberto Benigni chair jumping, a Sally Field you really LIKE me gush. Some of the acceptance speeches are fun, like Dianne Wiest, who won Best Supporting Actress for "Hannah and Her Sisters: "Gee, this isn't like I imagined it would be in the bathtub." Or just plain raw narcissism all tricked out in low couture: "Cher, Best Actress for 'Moonstruck': 'I'd like to thank everyone I worked with on the movie. They were really fabulous. It was really a great experience for me. My makeup man, who had a lot to work with. My hairdresser. My assistant . . .' Somehow she failed to thank her co-stars and her director."

Can't help loving to watch this trash but I wish it were Billy Crystal hosting, I do love his sillybiz and would have liked to see what he did with this year's best movie shoo-in.
posted by nickyskye at 7:28 PM on March 2, 2006

don't take this the wrong way. I love this post, but...

what's so crazy about olivier's speech?
posted by shmegegge at 8:11 PM on March 2, 2006

Nice post!

Thanks! Oh, there are so many people I have to thank for this...You like me...
posted by FeldBum at 8:14 PM on March 2, 2006

I keep seeing ads on TV for the awards, and I cringe each time they show Hilary Swank saying, "I was just a girl with a dream..."

Ugh... she must've written her acceptance speech when she was 14.
posted by Robot Johnny at 8:45 PM on March 2, 2006

shmegegge, I guess Olivier's speech sounded pompous and overblown.
posted by nickyskye at 8:58 PM on March 2, 2006

I can see someone feeling that way. It's funny. When it comes to language, writing, speaking and that kind of thing, the same phrase or passage can evoke two completely opposite reactions. Either the attempt to speak in a lofty and flowery manner is pompous, because no one speaks that way anymore, or it's a breath of fresh air because no one speaks that way anymore.
posted by shmegegge at 11:27 PM on March 2, 2006

I don't remember Olivier's speech -- I probably saw it. But if I read it, imagining him reading it, it works.

If I imagine Matt Dillon reading it, I cringe.
posted by lodurr at 5:41 AM on March 3, 2006

shmegegge--People these days are raised to reject eloquence. Geoff Nunberg argues that Bush has deliberately cultivated his brand of incoherent stuttering, for example, to seem more like an average Joe. Compare this to J.F.K., who was celebrated for his sophistication... Contrast this to Clinton, who could actually string a sentence together and was therefore "Slick WIllie". I mean, for God's sake Olivier was quoting Shakespeare in that speech!

I think that this is possibly a terrible symptom of an overall positive change in how we view class. It's much like people wearing t-shirts and jeans to the opera. It isn't pleasant, but perhaps it is a necessary part of a very slow shift to a classless society?
posted by Squid Voltaire at 8:46 AM on March 3, 2006

yeah... maybe something got lost in its delivery but... I dug Olivier's speech.
words are cool
posted by MeatLightning at 11:00 AM on March 3, 2006

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