Surf's Up?
May 24, 2006 12:31 AM   Subscribe

SaveLivesInMay - "I have received information psychically, which is corroborated by scientific data, according to which on May 25, 2006 a giant tsunami will occur in the Atlantic Ocean, brought about by the impact of a comet fragment which will provoke the eruption of under-sea volcanoes. Waves up to 200 m high will reach coastlines located above and below the Tropic of Cancer." Are you at risk? Meanwhile, FEMA just happens to be preoccupied on the Wrong West Coast.
posted by jahmoon (50 comments total)
cowabunga, dude! ... surf's up!
posted by pyramid termite at 12:43 AM on May 24, 2006

"I have received information psychically"

And that's where I stopped reading.
posted by PenDevil at 12:52 AM on May 24, 2006

While a military air traffic controller at Reims Air Base, France, he tracked a UFO traveling at 15,000 knots.

Sounds like this guy hasn't stopped sniffing glue.
posted by three blind mice at 1:05 AM on May 24, 2006

posted by tellurian at 1:47 AM on May 24, 2006

apres nous, la deluge!
posted by borq at 2:09 AM on May 24, 2006

'scuse me while I adjust my tinfoil hat...
posted by Doohickie at 2:39 AM on May 24, 2006

Pat Robertson agrees, and he can leg press 2000lbs so he must be telling the truth.
posted by Tenuki at 3:20 AM on May 24, 2006

I think the poster may be tongue in cheek b1tr0t. Of course, I can afford to scoff, I'm on top of a mountain 100km from the Pacific ;-)
posted by bystander at 3:33 AM on May 24, 2006

Yikes! I *knew* I shouldn't have moved from Toronto to Dublin last year!
posted by antifuse at 3:45 AM on May 24, 2006

yay! looks like i'll have beachfront property soon.
posted by Shike at 3:48 AM on May 24, 2006

b1tr0t, please note the "batshitinsane" tag.
posted by Faint of Butt at 4:32 AM on May 24, 2006

LOVE the Dymotape headings. They add a whole extra layer of authenticity and authority to the information.
posted by deadcowdan at 6:14 AM on May 24, 2006

You were correct when you said "wrong" coast (because they usually are...)
posted by tadellin at 6:16 AM on May 24, 2006

on May 25, 2006 a giant tsunami will occur in the Atlantic Ocean, brought about by the impact of a comet fragment

Either a comet fragment will hit on said date or it won't. I'll be shocked that 'information received psychically' was accurate.

At least the date will come and go quickly.
posted by rough ashlar at 6:20 AM on May 24, 2006

I think you're all failing to get b1tr0t's joke. Please note the caricature of paranoia.
posted by cortex at 6:46 AM on May 24, 2006

Tomorrow's going to be an interesting day, then! Good times!
posted by Hildegarde at 8:06 AM on May 24, 2006

If by the Atlantic Ocean he meant my pants then, well, he's still wrong.
posted by CynicalKnight at 8:27 AM on May 24, 2006

It's a good thing, then, that I moved nearly a decade ago to the West Coast. My psychic abilities must've been working overtime.

See you folks tomorrow.
posted by FormlessOne at 8:31 AM on May 24, 2006

If nothing else, the Are you at risk? page has some interesting maps. Not only is all of Florida that near to sea level, so is all of Delaware, New Jersey, Connecticut, Rhode Island, and half of Cuba. Notice how sharply Ireland, Great Britain, and Spain rise up from the sea though.

One thing that's strange (one thing, he says!) is that he's predicted the West Indies islands like Grenada and Martinique would shield their far sides from impact. In Maritime Canada, however, he has it looping right around Nova Scotia, covering Prince Edward Island, and right down the throat of the Saint Lawrence. I wonder why.
posted by Hubajube at 9:29 AM on May 24, 2006

So have you emailed your premonitions in to yet?
posted by ancientgower at 9:29 AM on May 24, 2006

Goodbye Disneyworld.
posted by stavrogin at 9:54 AM on May 24, 2006

LOVE the Dymotape headings. They add a whole extra layer of authenticity and authority to the information.
posted by deadcowdan at 9:14 AM EST on May 24

I'd believe this guy if the font was Courier New.
posted by marxchivist at 9:55 AM on May 24, 2006

25th of May is the 1st anniversary of this cataclysmic event. Just sayin.
posted by Sk4n at 10:11 AM on May 24, 2006

Wow, I just read a bit more, and a third of the way down here, he uses Deep Impact and Poseidon as part of his evidence that this is happening.
posted by Hubajube at 10:13 AM on May 24, 2006

Holy shit, dude, that's tomorrow! Thanks for the warning!
posted by OmieWise at 10:59 AM on May 24, 2006

I'm sure on Friday there will be some explanation as to how they diverted the comet with the power of their minds or something equally brilliant.
posted by raedyn at 11:47 AM on May 24, 2006

I was worried to see the fllowing at the bottom of the forum page:

Events within the next 5 days...

No forthcoming events within the next 5 days found.

posted by quarsan at 11:48 AM on May 24, 2006

Reality: I do not belong to the scientific community.

From Huba's page, comparing Deep Impact to the "real" disaster.
posted by Squid Voltaire at 1:23 PM on May 24, 2006

If I don't post from Rhode Island tomorrow... or Cape Cod this weekend... it's probably because I started the Memorial Day Weekend perma-buzz early.

posted by mogabog at 1:54 PM on May 24, 2006

I hope I see you all tomorrow. If not, think of me fondly!
posted by OmieWise at 1:55 PM on May 24, 2006

In explanation for why he added the 6/6/06 release of the Omen remake as another sign...

May 25, 2006 is in fact June 6, 2006 – once converted into the Julian calendar

alrighty then.
posted by nomisxid at 2:12 PM on May 24, 2006

The forums (registration required), particularly the Top 100 Things you Need section, include a lot about Bionade water purification and some $60 soap and such. Which just so happen to be for sale on the website of one of the main contributors and moderators.

From the forum-
some "must have" suggestions that I recommend (I'll update later):

BIONAID for water purification, anti-germicidal (the ultimate so far/15+ years of clinical proof/Not FDA approved as a "drug")
Miracle II biodegradable soaps, anti-germicidal

"Wine is strong, the King is stronger, women are strongest, but TRUTH conquers all."

Edited: 5/21/2006 7:02:16 AM by Elder

I for one am off to get my Bionade and my dinghy.
posted by rollbiz at 2:16 PM on May 24, 2006

Bah. Everyone knows that batshitinsane people use centered yellow text on red background, or something like that. If the page has a minimum of taste in formatting, this must be true.

On the other hand, Tsunamicube sure sounds cool.
posted by qvantamon at 3:44 PM on May 24, 2006

Note to self: don't go to the beach tomorrow.
posted by SenshiNeko at 4:05 PM on May 24, 2006

If you are looking for an experienced Denver real estate agent look no further. No worries at 5,280 feet: in fact, we're expecting June to be our biggest year ever...
posted by cenoxo at 6:14 PM on May 24, 2006

I was going to email and ask `What will you be saying after the date comes and goes and nothing happens?' but frankly, what is the point?
posted by tomble at 6:32 PM on May 24, 2006

Wow, this takes me back to Zetatalk. Her doomsday date was in May 2003 and she's still at it. She had some disciples for a while there.
posted by nanojath at 8:44 PM on May 24, 2006

"Among the many types of phenomena that have manifested during the last two years, for example when I received a message on the tri-dimensional nature of time"

I thought it was cube shaped? Clearly a loony.
posted by Mcable at 4:58 AM on May 25, 2006

For the record, we're all dead.
posted by cortex at 7:54 AM on May 25, 2006

I'm not dead yet, although I know from past experience that you've been trying to bury me for months!
posted by OmieWise at 8:10 AM on May 25, 2006

You might be, I'm breathing through a snorkel here.
posted by longbaugh at 8:40 AM on May 25, 2006

From the forums:

According to an informant on the Craigslist Political forum for Washington, D.C., all members of Congress received a memo this morning about "evacuation drills" that would be run later today. Coincidence?

It is really happening!!!

Craigslist informants? Stupidity truly knows no bounds...
posted by rollbiz at 10:03 AM on May 25, 2006

Al Jazeera reports panic in Morocco. Onward, to higher ground!
posted by ewagoner at 10:41 AM on May 25, 2006

Link is dead. Hmmmm.
posted by rollbiz at 1:35 PM on May 25, 2006

Aw man, I feel kinda bad. What happened to the guy? Did he kill himself because his life's work was for nothing? What happened to him?
posted by redteam at 3:03 PM on May 25, 2006

A very, very small Tsunami took him out.
posted by cortex at 3:11 PM on May 25, 2006

He's still got time.

According to this page:

9) “The population will be alerted at 6 p.m. The first warning will be given by CNN. The next one will come from the Pentagon. The evacuation area will be announced as stretching from Key West, Florida, to Plymouth Rock, Massachusetts.” – Bob Neumann

10) “The impact of the three asteroids will happen at 22:00 Hrs.” - Bob Neumann

Although it is 6pm now. Also, I'm assuming we'd be able to see a comet that is a few hours from striking the Earth, right? ;-)

And OMG the forums are down!
posted by jahmoon at 3:14 PM on May 25, 2006

Hmmm...still nothing. I wonder why?
posted by jahmoon at 3:16 PM on May 25, 2006

UPDATE MAY 25, 2006:
According to informed sources, contacts in the American intelligence services confirm the existence of a time window of 48 hours, centered on May 25th at midnight GMT, for the impact a comet fragment south of the Azores.

This corroborates information of an evacuation exercise of the U.S. Congress to occur later in the day of May 25th, information which reached us this morning.

As a measure of precaution, I suggest the authorities do the utmost to protect the populations of the Atlantic coastlines. -- Eric Julien

posted by rollbiz at 9:17 PM on May 25, 2006 (possibly NSFW)
posted by staggernation at 5:48 AM on May 26, 2006

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