I said, can't you see this old boy's gettin' lonely?
July 7, 2006 10:05 PM   Subscribe

Jump In My Car is the newest song by David Hasselhoff. Google video.
posted by fandango_matt (70 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
My mom went to high school with David Hasselhoff. I have emailed her this link. Thank you.
posted by macadamiaranch at 10:22 PM on July 7, 2006

Don't Hassle the Hoff.

And I still dont get what those Australians see in him.
posted by SirOmega at 10:26 PM on July 7, 2006

That wasn't nearly as bizarre as Hooked on a Feeling (youtube).
posted by borkingchikapa at 10:27 PM on July 7, 2006

I hope I look that good at 148 years after my last re-juve. Should it ever happen that I refuse a re-juve for political reasons. [holy cow what happed to his face?]
posted by econous at 10:37 PM on July 7, 2006

Good lord - Hooked on a Feeling is a very uncomfortable combination of easy listening and really really uneasy viewing...
posted by OverlappingElvis at 10:43 PM on July 7, 2006

Come to think of it, you could really say that about David Hasselhoff himself, too.
posted by OverlappingElvis at 10:46 PM on July 7, 2006

The continued fame of that man baffles me. Honestly, who picks up a Hasselhoff album and says to themselves "YES. I must own this man's voice."?

It is a mystery.
posted by Drunken_munky at 10:52 PM on July 7, 2006

"Don't Hassel the Hoff" — Too bad the shirt is so expensive.
posted by spacelux at 10:59 PM on July 7, 2006

He's driving a cylon.
posted by Auguris at 11:00 PM on July 7, 2006

He's starting to get that crypt keeper look about him.
posted by Dillenger69 at 11:01 PM on July 7, 2006

In 9 days, David Hasselhoff will be 54 years old.

Now watch that video again.
posted by cribcage at 11:06 PM on July 7, 2006

So, that video was done in Flash/Shockwave, right? It reminds me of the Hyakugojyuuichi video from many years back.
posted by arcticwoman at 11:09 PM on July 7, 2006

The bizzarre bahaviour, followed by the self-deprecative bizarre behaviour, is a metaphorical manifestation of the Hasselhoff Incursion.

It's high-level shit man.
posted by jimmythefish at 11:14 PM on July 7, 2006

Drunken_munkey It is a mystery. More a mummy I'd say.
posted by econous at 11:15 PM on July 7, 2006

Er...the Hasselhoffian Incursion. And, the link doesn't allow linking.

Damn you, brain and internets. Damn you. Cut and paste at will:

posted by jimmythefish at 11:17 PM on July 7, 2006

jimmythefish, its actually called a recursion, check your URL. Though my brain was damaged by the incursion of the recursion into my brain. Again.

In regards to watching a walking noid like Haselhoff sing or do anything? No thanks, like drugs, I just say no.
posted by fenriq at 11:26 PM on July 7, 2006

We Australians don't care for the Hoff, its actually Kitt we really want.
posted by a. at 11:33 PM on July 7, 2006

Mensch, das war super. Der Hasselhoff macht einfach tolle Musik. Und der blaue Pepsi schmeckt ja auch so gut.
posted by jouke at 11:35 PM on July 7, 2006

He's playing MeFi like a fiddle.
Pawned by the Hoff.
posted by jouke at 11:36 PM on July 7, 2006

Did this chart anywhere?
posted by parmanparman at 11:42 PM on July 7, 2006

Random thoughts:

* What the fuck happened to this man's eyes?
* A back-and-forth song that tells a story with three chicks as back-up singers. Hmm. Hasslehoff is just like Ray Charles. But, you know, white. And lacking talent.
* When did the KITT car get right-hand drive? Was it always like that?
* Whole lotta Americana symbols for a video that'll play in Europe. Guess they don't hate us after all. Pity us, maybe. But no haters.
posted by frogan at 11:49 PM on July 7, 2006

Um, rats, fenriq. I think this thesis writing is damaging me permanently. I really should have just gone to bed hours ago.
posted by jimmythefish at 11:49 PM on July 7, 2006

After watching this, I'm pretty sure I can no longer be persuaded into ever wanting to hit that.
posted by theperfectcrime at 11:50 PM on July 7, 2006

I am german ... must buy record immediatly ...
posted by homodigitalis at 11:55 PM on July 7, 2006

Fantastic. A pity Ted Mulry never lived to see it.
posted by Wolof at 12:07 AM on July 8, 2006

One cannot tell on which side the steering wheel is, because in the driving scenes, nobody is driving
posted by longsleeves at 12:24 AM on July 8, 2006

posted by longsleeves at 12:27 AM on July 8, 2006

You do not know pain until you truly understand the suffering that is the The Hasselhoffian Recursion [This is good]
posted by crunchyk9 at 12:43 AM on July 8, 2006

Is it just me, or does the Recursion seem like it needs another frame? There's a pretty noticable jump right after his head reaches the top of the image...
posted by equalpants at 12:59 AM on July 8, 2006

Hey, I wouldn't spend any money on him, but sometimes I like a guy who takes the piss out of himself (that is, in case my slang is incomprehensible, is willing to make fun of himself or let others do it.)

lotta Americana symbols Really? What were they? Yeah, I got the Babewatch & Kit ones, but they were broadcast here too - more Hoff than US. US Flag - classic cliche and he wasn't exactly being serious in that shot. I guess Ayers Rock was a nod to Kangaroo Jack - which is using Australian icons to make an American movie, and this song is using a traditional Australian song to make an American video. It fits. In a sick and twisted way.

Okay, excuse me, now I got to go wash my eyes out. The facelift on that guy is so tight that nothing moves except his jaw.
posted by b33j at 1:05 AM on July 8, 2006

Wow, I was seriously this close to posting that.
posted by delmoi at 1:25 AM on July 8, 2006

Some of the other things in the playlist are pretty intresting.
posted by delmoi at 2:06 AM on July 8, 2006

delmoi -- is that John Holmes playing [sic] keyboards?
posted by lodurr at 4:16 AM on July 8, 2006

Sounds like an old Ziggy Stardust song.
posted by vertriebskonzept at 4:24 AM on July 8, 2006

That was awesome. And by awesome, I mean totally sweet.

(Did they clear the rights for KITT though? That's the part that nailed the video for me. Jump in my Car... for us to TURBO BOOST to PleasureTown!)
posted by cavalier at 4:42 AM on July 8, 2006

HasselhoffTour.com - referenced in the video.

Say what you will, the man truly understands the global media marketplace.
posted by cavalier at 4:43 AM on July 8, 2006

David Hasselhoff IS a Cylon. He will have a love story with Lee Adama in the third season of Galactica.
posted by darkripper at 5:42 AM on July 8, 2006

So how did he really hurt his hand in London last week? And was he ejected from Wimbledon
posted by A189Nut at 5:42 AM on July 8, 2006

Rhinestone Cowboy (if you look closely, he's lip-syncing) is even stranger.
posted by mrbill at 5:43 AM on July 8, 2006

"Jump my shark" by David Hasselhoff.
posted by fire&wings at 5:59 AM on July 8, 2006

Hasselhoff + shaving + chandelier = surgery, which gets my vote for Best. Headline. Ever.
posted by emelenjr at 6:42 AM on July 8, 2006

Did anyone else watch "The Making of Jump In My Car?" It's funny to see him take off and put on his reading glasses before/after each scene. I feel like the director/producer/whoever (blue/white stiped shirt, mustache) is thinking that he's finally made it to the top now that he's working with The Hoff.

A girl I went to high school with taught his kids and said that she had a hard time keeping a straight face during parent-teacher conferences.
posted by Frank Grimes at 7:04 AM on July 8, 2006

Say what you want, but there's no denying he's growing some nice tits these days.
posted by Meatbomb at 7:19 AM on July 8, 2006

posted by Decani at 7:33 AM on July 8, 2006

I suspect that he's becoming the next William Shatner.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 8:07 AM on July 8, 2006

Tags for the Google video: hasselhoff, ridiculous, david hasselhoff, david hassehoff, wth, súlyosság, stupid, shakira, omgwtfbbq, omfgwtfbbq, lynn tess, kitt, ken lay, jump in my car, hooked,
posted by Feisty at 8:08 AM on July 8, 2006

KirkJobSluder beat me to the concept, and i would have said Adam West, but yeah.

The man is clearly comfortable enough in his own skin to make fun of his fame. Say what you will, i think that's pretty cool.
posted by quin at 8:58 AM on July 8, 2006

In 9 days, David Hasselhoff will be 54 years old.

Now watch that video again.
posted by cribcage at 2:06 AM EST on July 8 [+fave] [!]

Sadly, it simply doesn't make it any worse.
posted by juiceCake at 9:09 AM on July 8, 2006

The Hasselhoffian Recursion

Watching that, it seems slightly out of phase. I think they need to repair their Vagoda Coil.
posted by juiceCake at 9:10 AM on July 8, 2006

posted by O9scar at 9:17 AM on July 8, 2006

I suspect that he's becoming the next William Shatner.

I suspect he wishes he was becoming the next William Shatner. He's not a good enough bad actor to pull it off, methinks.

I love that he actually did the white-man's overbite during the... uh... dance sequence.
posted by papercake at 9:18 AM on July 8, 2006

He's in the movie "Click" thats in theaters right now. It's fun cause he plays a part that fits him well, a dick-head guy. Its fun cause it's like he knows he's a love-to-hate him personality.
posted by BillsR100 at 9:19 AM on July 8, 2006

Is he aware that he's the butt of the joke and doesn't care (see: William Shatner)? Or is he (impossibly) oblivious?
posted by wfc123 at 9:41 AM on July 8, 2006

For a second I thought the women in the video were going to say "I know you're gay," but then they said "game."
posted by snofoam at 9:47 AM on July 8, 2006

Stroke, his left eye is fucked, silly bastard put no cash aside for contingencies. With the facts available fucked up left side of the head, possibly elsewhere, and the fucker still working it like a pole-dancing-queen back to the street, the only answer is a stroke. [disclaimer: I am not a rhine stone cowboy. And shall avoid that horrid overbite thing more assiduously on the strip.]
posted by econous at 10:22 AM on July 8, 2006

Of course could be his other side or simply too much botox. WTC 7 was never directly hit.
posted by econous at 10:25 AM on July 8, 2006

Christ, what are they gonna do next, turn Kitt into Le Car or something?

Blasphemy I say.
posted by bardic at 10:39 AM on July 8, 2006

(And he's no Billy Ocean.)
posted by bardic at 11:41 AM on July 8, 2006

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
posted by Cyrano at 2:00 PM on July 8, 2006

I'm so not going to click that FPP link. You can't make me, you sadistic bastard fuckers.
posted by loquacious at 2:24 PM on July 8, 2006

*clicks link*

Get out... get the fuck OUT OF MY MIND!
posted by loquacious at 2:28 PM on July 8, 2006

The song Hotshot City is particularly good - Reviews of a Hasselhoff album.

(Warning: hours of gut-busting laughter follows.)
posted by madman at 4:26 AM on July 9, 2006

The only man who can fill Tom Jones shoes. . .
posted by Sprayboothwilly at 5:03 AM on July 9, 2006

Thank you Sony, for producing that. Keep up the good work.
posted by Colloquial Collision at 7:40 AM on July 9, 2006

The only thing that David Hasselhoff and Tom Jones have in common is lots of chest hair.
posted by lodurr at 7:52 AM on July 9, 2006

My friend told the story of seeing Tom Jones in Vegas. As she was watching him, I think he was singing "Sex Bomb", she noticed movement in her peripheral vision... David Hasselhof was there, in the audience! And he was dancing! And singing along!

Suddenly, Tom Jones noticed the Hof! He came down off the stage, walking towards my friend and David Hasselhof! It was happening, right in front of her, Tom Jones and David Hasselhof, dancing together and singing "Sex Bomb"!

This is a true story.
posted by Meatbomb at 9:39 AM on July 9, 2006

This video proves one thing: Germans-love-David Hasselhoff!
posted by zorro astor at 11:17 AM on July 9, 2006

meatbomb: Your poor friend! Can a single human body contain the complete orgasmitude of that situation?
posted by Sparx at 2:28 PM on July 9, 2006

Wax on Wax Hoff
posted by dripdripdrop at 7:01 PM on July 9, 2006

Wax on Wax Hoff

You can't pull off his eyebrows. How disappointing.
posted by lodurr at 9:46 AM on July 10, 2006

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