July 30, 2006 6:02 PM   Subscribe

The politically incorrect alphabet: an alphabet using only subjects that, while they might have been unremarked a few decades ago, are now outside acceptable usage. But only just. (mildly nsfw)
posted by onkelchrispy (46 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
mildly nsfw

That pretty much says it all. If you are going to do this kind of thing you can't go all half assed and mildly nsfw, you need to go full throttle.
posted by caddis at 6:15 PM on July 30, 2006 [1 favorite]

Sexy Alphabet
posted by Balisong at 6:23 PM on July 30, 2006

Ah ha ha ha ha ha!! G for "grill"...yeaaaaaaah.
posted by ArsncHeart at 6:27 PM on July 30, 2006

Man, fairy, pouffe, and even fag are kind of lame in this deck. Come on, I want flamers and women in flannel wearing cleats! How's it okay to show an 'arab' for A when you have to resort to funny dialect-centricc puns with the rest? Isn't equal rights getting anywhere?

posted by taursir at 6:27 PM on July 30, 2006

posted by alteredcarbon at 6:27 PM on July 30, 2006

Naked alphabet (nsfw)
posted by caddis at 6:28 PM on July 30, 2006

This is mild.
posted by TwelveTwo at 6:34 PM on July 30, 2006

Ghost? Gun? Adam? What? These are outside acceptable usage? Is this supposed to be funny?
posted by blacklite at 6:35 PM on July 30, 2006

(self link) The Warren Street Literacy and Vandalism Project commissioned me to do an alphabet-themed work a few weeks ago. Not yet available for viewing online, the installation is open to all, free of charge, on Warren Street, between Broadway and Church, Tribeca, NYC, 24/7.
posted by Meatbomb at 6:35 PM on July 30, 2006

A tenuous idea and a load of crap.
posted by fire&wings at 6:36 PM on July 30, 2006

Catapult? Match? Salute? Am I missing something?
posted by blacklite at 6:36 PM on July 30, 2006

Blacklite, they're being kind of pansy about their PCness. It might be something you have to dig for.
posted by taursir at 6:39 PM on July 30, 2006

Goatse is illegal. If you click on this link, DO NOT CLICK ON THE LINK IN COMMENT NUMBER 15 it is goatse, a big gaping pornographic anus that will not go away and will likely cause you to reboot your computer, and may even install a rootkit for all I know. Don't click on it! It is so not safe for work, for home, for any sane person. Well, you have been warned, but you're gonna do it aren't you? I did. Therapy might or might not help me after that. I don't know if anything will help my computer.
posted by caddis at 6:39 PM on July 30, 2006

Axe? Atomic Energy? Arrow? Blackboard? Boxer? Bride?

I don't get this at all. Why would anyone waste so much time on something so dumb?
posted by delmoi at 6:49 PM on July 30, 2006

But...hanger doesn't start with 'A'. Ohhhh......
posted by leapingsheep at 7:01 PM on July 30, 2006

Thought this was gentle mischief. Thanks onkelchrispy.

A neat animation of the evolution of our alphabet.
posted by nickyskye at 7:07 PM on July 30, 2006

I don't get this at all. Why would anyone waste so much time on something so dumb?

Yeah, zoning out on MetaFilter is so much more meaningful!

posted by Meatbomb at 7:13 PM on July 30, 2006

The ABZ's.
posted by IshmaelGraves at 7:37 PM on July 30, 2006

I love Shel Silverstein's ABZ's.
posted by nickyskye at 8:01 PM on July 30, 2006

Subtlety is lost on this crowd, apparently. I enjoyed a few of the ones, but oddly not the more over the top ones, but the ones that I actually could have imagined being in a book when I was a kid, which I think was the point of this exercise.
posted by Space Coyote at 8:08 PM on July 30, 2006

Oh man, he wrote c*mp! He's so edgy!
posted by revgeorge at 8:19 PM on July 30, 2006

Backlash against politically incorrect terms that no one EVER has considered politically incorrect is fucking stupid.
posted by graventy at 8:27 PM on July 30, 2006

I don't get this at all. Why would anyone waste so much time on something so dumb?

What everyone seems to be missing here is that its the context of the images that make a lot of them politically incorrect. Alphabet cards are mostly found in early childhood environments (kindergarden, play group, the first years of primary schooling) and therefore make the earliest links between an image and a letter.

"Gun" is an obvious example. The word itself may not be particularly offensive; the idea that it becomes the first word a child ever associates with the letter g is. "Bride", "Nurse" and "Stewardess" becomes problematic when they are the few representations of women in a child's environment, as was the case when I was in school. They limit the social roles little girls are exposed to, and thus the things they can aspire to in later life.

Context is everything, people.
posted by Jilder at 9:31 PM on July 30, 2006

"abortion" and "Grill". Those two alone justify the entire set.

I confess, had to twist my mind a little to understand the hanger. Early mondey, 2AM here, the evil parts of my brain are sleeping.
posted by cardoso at 10:03 PM on July 30, 2006

That is my favorite game!
posted by TwelveTwo at 10:27 PM on July 30, 2006

That is my favorite game!

What are you suggesting? Games like Russian Roullette you mean?
The same Russians who were involved in World War II?
The same World War where man Jews were persecuted?
The same religious group whom were slandered recenty by Mel Gibson?
The same Mel Gibson who starred in a movie about sexist attitudes toward women?
The same gender who male homosexuals don't have sex with?

Boy TwelveTwo, you have a lot of nerve making a gay joke here.
posted by Serial Killer Slumber Party at 10:51 PM on July 30, 2006 [1 favorite]

That pretty much says it all. If you are going to do this kind of thing you can't go all half assed and mildly nsfw, you need to go full throttle.

Had jonmc just been to see Avenue Q that week, or what?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:45 AM on July 31, 2006

Is it bad that "abortion" came to mind before the word "hanger"?
posted by null terminated at 1:31 AM on July 31, 2006

Well, you had the letter "A" to prime you, and all the pictograms signifying "words that start with A" around the hanger.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 5:15 AM on July 31, 2006

Ooohhhh, "Atom Bomb".

I guessed "Anal Plug".

(some of this is very good)
posted by NinjaTadpole at 5:51 AM on July 31, 2006

My wife is a children's book illustrator and does a lot of work for educational publishers. She got a very snarky laugh out of this because she's had to deal with this stuff all the time. Her favorite story is the time she did a summer reading program poster that was used in several states. The theme was King Aurthur and the Knights of the Round Table, and she wasn't allowed to use images of Merlin because he was a wizard. She also says dinosaurs are gettting to be dangerous territory lately, playing cards are a no-no, and several other things she can't remember now.
posted by Mcable at 6:02 AM on July 31, 2006

I expected "tart" to have a picture of something much different.
posted by wfc123 at 8:01 AM on July 31, 2006

Beaver? Missed opportunity there, mate.
posted by klangklangston at 8:20 AM on July 31, 2006

I liked 'em. Thanks.
posted by ClaudiaCenter at 8:26 AM on July 31, 2006

C is for slingshot?
posted by oraknabo at 8:42 AM on July 31, 2006

Mcable, Interesting anecdote.
posted by nickyskye at 11:08 AM on July 31, 2006

Also I'd add that this appears to be a UK website. A few years ago, actually about a decade ago, or a little more, political correctness in the UK was extremely mad, nowhere more so than in schools and especially primary schools: to the point where the words some people were denying above being politically incorrect absolutely were. Any word that might be used to single out and ridicule people was cast out of the vocabulary of our schools to the point where you would struggle to actually differentiate anything - it became unacceptable to use either the terms blackboard or whiteboard. You couldn't say policeman about a policeman or police-woman about a police-woman, and as such anything slightly controversial, like violence or sex was totally taboo. You think I'm exaggerating? I'm not.

The word "no" was out of favour because if you said no to a child you were stunting their development and making them feel bad. It almost seemed you couldn't actually teach a child anything for fear of patronising them, making them feel inadequate or insulting their intelligence. I did a bit of work experience in a primary school in 1994, and my Mum had been a special needs specialist in schools for several years by that time.

From my perspective, this alphabet is spot on. Great stuff.
posted by nthdegx at 12:29 PM on July 31, 2006

I should add that actually the move toward political correctness was needed, and since that time we would probably find some of the teaching practices or even polite conversation of the 80s unacceptable today, and rightly so. The thinking of time was right to emphasise supporting and nurturing the child, but in doing so perhaps failed to challenge them whatsoever. They seemed uninspiring times, and I am glad my early schooling was in the mid 80s and not the mid 90s.
posted by nthdegx at 12:33 PM on July 31, 2006

I can vouch for Mcable's wife's anecdotes. It gets really silly. The fun part is when they want a word illustrated that just won't work within their guidelines, for example "rob", and you have to explain to them that it doesn't really make sense to have a guy in a ski mask (which might be Too Scary in and of itself) completing an apparently normal transaction with a teller without wielding a gun or a weapon of any kind.

It doesn't always go PC either; the charmingest episode is when I had an interracial hug nixed.
posted by furiousthought at 1:26 PM on July 31, 2006

posted by incomple at 2:55 PM on July 31, 2006

(And yes, I'm a Yank, but I know what Daleks are. It just seems strange, it's not like the Cybermen were on there.

...Oh, wait.)

posted by incomple at 2:57 PM on July 31, 2006

Why is faggot a big brown dot? Is that suppose to be a cornhole or something?
posted by vodkadin at 3:20 PM on July 31, 2006

a cornhole or something

LOL! That's a good question!
posted by nickyskye at 4:23 PM on July 31, 2006

A faggot is a meatball. Try googling Brains Pork Faggots, although maybe not at work.
posted by inpHilltr8r at 5:22 PM on July 31, 2006

A meatball? Really? omg, You're right.

although maybe not at work


Check this out for political correctness mayhem potential:
Family of faggot fans fly the flag
The Doody family from Wolverhampton has been crowned The Faggot Family in a national competition, and to kick off their reign they will launch National Faggot Week.
posted by nickyskye at 5:37 PM on July 31, 2006

posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 3:19 PM on August 1, 2006

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