But When They Saw Him Driving Upon The Sea, They Supposed It Had Been A Spirit...
October 22, 2006 4:48 PM   Subscribe

If Jesus were alive today, what sort of jeep would he drive? Why that's simple, of course. He'd drive the jeep that can drive on water!
posted by Effigy2000 (34 comments total)
What is up with the crazy-ass vignetting in Top Gear?
posted by delmoi at 4:55 PM on October 22, 2006

I want one
posted by craven_morhead at 4:57 PM on October 22, 2006

Isn't that exactly the sort of Jeep that Jesus WOULDN'T need?
posted by planetkyoto at 5:02 PM on October 22, 2006

Don't thousands of ice fishermen in Minnesota drive their Jeeps across water every winter?
posted by TedW at 5:03 PM on October 22, 2006

I can't believe that works. Cool.
posted by snsranch at 5:09 PM on October 22, 2006

Richard Hammond in his element
posted by lemonfridge at 5:17 PM on October 22, 2006

In related news -- Aquatic car drives with 'oooomph'.
posted by ericb at 5:23 PM on October 22, 2006

Could someone explain the physics here?
posted by phrontist at 5:25 PM on October 22, 2006

Could someone explain the physics here?

You know how stones can skip over water if thrown correctly? Same thing, only a much larger stone and a much more powerful throw.
posted by c13 at 5:38 PM on October 22, 2006

Best of the web last month's TV.
posted by pompomtom at 6:17 PM on October 22, 2006

posted by evilelvis at 6:24 PM on October 22, 2006

Amazing. I was holding my breath as they made their first run across the lake.
posted by micketymoc at 6:56 PM on October 22, 2006

Too funny, I read the FPP and thought hey, I know what this is about, and look: only 12 comments, I bet no one linked to the Top Gear youtube yet. That will make a great contribution.

Then I clicked on the link.


Though the bit with the snowmobile does give me dark thoughts about some of the calmer lakes in my neck of the woods. Bad thoughts. Thoughts that should not be spoken of here. Thoughts that could get me or someone else seriously injured. And possibly jailed for stealing a snowmobile and trying to ride it across a friggin' lake. One that isn't frozen even!
posted by quin at 7:18 PM on October 22, 2006

On a tangentally related note, Richard Hammond is recovering remarkably well.

Which is good, because I've been jonesing for new Top Gear episodes and I ain't gonna get them till he gets better.
posted by quin at 7:24 PM on October 22, 2006

I live in Wisconsin
Snowmobilers have long known that as long as they keep moving they can make it across open water. The trouble is that most snowmobilers who find themselves on open water are drunk ... or just young and stupid. It happens often enough that at least Maine has a state law against it.

"Watercross racing" photos.

Anyway, having read Jared Diamond's Collapse about the unbelievably fragile environment of Iceland and its crippling erosion problem, I was a little discomfitted by the four-wheeling.
posted by dhartung at 7:27 PM on October 22, 2006

I watched it with the sound off, and it looks to me like a very shallow stream. Ankle deep. I'm not impressed.
posted by davy at 7:42 PM on October 22, 2006

And I'd rather have an MGB. With a roll bar.
posted by davy at 7:44 PM on October 22, 2006


Mind you, Jesus is a busy guy, and you can't just walk everywhere. Plus, have you ever tried carrying groceries for 14 people? Fish sandwiches only go so far...
posted by Samizdata at 7:44 PM on October 22, 2006

davy : try it with the sound on. Then you'll hear the commentator say (iirc, I saw this on digg weeks ago...) something along the lines of 'if it goes wrong we'll sink like a stone' so I'm guessing it's a bit deeper than that ...even though this is The Hamster we're talking about :)
posted by kaemaril at 8:13 PM on October 22, 2006

Nice to see that Icelanders, who have some of the most beautiful terrain on the planet, can't help looking at it and saying, "Man I can't wait to fuck that up with my ATV!"
posted by fungible at 9:03 PM on October 22, 2006

I read the article on Richard Hammond's remarkable recovery in quin's link and I am wondering what "...driving like a t**t" could possibly mean.

Any help?
posted by Occams Hammer at 10:17 PM on October 22, 2006

Yes, I expect they are cheating and driving through shallows. Those are sand bars they are in the vicinity of. I've seen big American SUVs try this over deep water (someone post a link) Its an evolution of mud bogging but Americans dont cheat and the SUVs sink. (At least most of the ones on the video I saw a few years ago on ESPN2 did. One or two made it though, and that was truly impressive.)
posted by Muirwylde at 10:24 PM on October 22, 2006

No doubt the censored word is "twat", British slang for a clitoris.
posted by Effigy2000 at 10:24 PM on October 22, 2006

I weep to know that there are children growing up in the world that DON'T know this is an option, or that have never seen this. I remember seeing the local yobs on their skidoos crossing lakes and dugouts in the middle of summer as a child...
posted by blue_beetle at 10:51 PM on October 22, 2006

If Jesus were alive today, what sort of jeep would he drive?

He would drive a Land Cruiser.

Remember, friends don't let friends drive Jeeps.
posted by mlis at 11:06 PM on October 22, 2006

dhartung : I live in Wisconsin

I feel a deep sadness for you. You live in one of the worst states in America. Seriously, weather wise, that is some Arctic/ sub-tropical shit you people have going on up there. The only people in the states that have it worse are those fuckers in Minnesota. They live in the land of the damned as far as I'm concerned.

That said, I have the unfortunate admission that I also live in Wisconsin, so I feel your pain.

So... wanna steal a snowmobile and try to cross a lake with me? Come on, it'll be fun. ;)
posted by quin at 11:10 PM on October 22, 2006

Quin, you're forgetting North Dakota.
posted by flaterik at 11:20 PM on October 22, 2006

No mention of those sad canadians...
posted by delmoi at 12:26 AM on October 23, 2006

Effigy2000 : Not quite.
posted by kaemaril at 1:28 AM on October 23, 2006

Dad had to drive one of these once. And the Wehrmacht found these pretty useful at times.
posted by pax digita at 3:01 AM on October 23, 2006

But it isn't a Jeep, right? I mean, Jeep is a product of the Daimler Chrysler AG, but this has a chevy engine in it. So it ceases to be a Jeep, doesn't it?

It's more of a vehicle with a Jeep-styled body, but it isn't a Jeep.

Is that a good thing, that it isn't a Jeep? Probably so, maybe it gets better fuel mileage. But then someone put a GM engine in it.
posted by benjh at 6:14 AM on October 23, 2006

benjh: while Jeep might be a product of DC AG, many many many folks use "jeep" as a generic term describing all SUV-type vehicles on this side of the pond (in Ireland, at any rate).

And yes, this is a damn fine Top Gear bit... not as cool as the remote control full-sized cars, but still pretty fun. And I'm pretty sure they weren't cheating, either (I like to think that the Top Gear boys have a bit more integrity than all that... when they go extreme, they go extreme for REALZ, no need to fake it all up).
posted by antifuse at 6:44 AM on October 23, 2006

"...Americans dont cheat..." Citation?
posted by econous at 7:41 AM on October 23, 2006

quin: Ah, I love a reasonable bit of winter (and they're notably milder on average than in my chldhood, thanks to you-know-what). I can't stand humidity, it turns me into a quivering mass governed by a lizard brain. Plus, we have da U.P., Minnesota, and the Dakotas to envy us.

Anyway, you can pretty much tell the change of seasons by the first reports of snowmobilers in a lake.
posted by dhartung at 9:44 AM on October 23, 2006

« Older Man shall not live by bread alone--yeah right.   |   The Micropolitan Museum Newer »

This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments