The Human Race

December 20, 2006 9:57 AM

"Welcome to The Human Race. Our system has been updated. You can now spend your entire life on hold."
posted by mongonikol (16 comments total)

This is where I mention that Sparks has a rather perfect song called "Your Call Is Very Important To Us, Please Hold."
posted by beaucoupkevin at 10:00 AM on December 20, 2006

I have never been happier to have the Firefox Flash Blocker extension installed.
posted by davejay at 10:01 AM on December 20, 2006

Position 9 bothers me, always has. I want to start a campaign to put "no cell phones" on every public toilet stall door I see.
posted by piratebowling at 10:29 AM on December 20, 2006

Link to the Sparks song "Your Call Is Very Important To Us. Please Hold." [Requires Rhapsody.]

Also, "What's Wrong With Flash?" article.

And then, for the less knee-jerking proprietary revulsive amongst us, "Why Flash rocks!"

I, for one, welcome our new Flash proprietary software Overloards, as I am...an Adobe (formerly Marcromedia) Flash zombie!

Or, in the vernacular of my Flash zombie mind, "...Must have Flash..."

In any case, the link has absolutely nothing to do with flash. But you do have to have a connected phone. Cheers!
posted by mongonikol at 10:37 AM on December 20, 2006

Hmmm.

I called the number, sat trough some matcing-apir question and then finally got put through to the voicemail of someone named "Summer".
posted by ShawnStruck at 10:40 AM on December 20, 2006

"Summer?" Is this some part of "The Lost Experience?" Is this page going to be vandalized by anti-Hanso activists?
posted by hifiparasol at 10:44 AM on December 20, 2006

Monogonikol, I am (in part) a Flash developer by trade. I think that it can be quite fantastic when used properly. Nevertheless, all those little movies downloading and playing on my screen simultaneously would probably have given me a seizure.
posted by davejay at 10:45 AM on December 20, 2006

Positions 2, 3, 5, and 12 appear to be in the same apartment, judging by the walls. I sort of hope it catches fire.
posted by Pastabagel at 10:54 AM on December 20, 2006

This is oddly fascinating.
posted by salvia at 11:26 AM on December 20, 2006

Also, the musical choices are so perfect. I got Nu Shooz - "I can't wait" (1986) and Wilson Phillips' Hold On (1990), made really scratchy.
posted by salvia at 11:30 AM on December 20, 2006

Nu Shooz? Out of Portland? Holy one hit wonder, batman!
posted by maxwelton at 11:46 AM on December 20, 2006

What am I missing? does the site do anything, or is it just a bunch of flash LJ icons?
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 12:54 PM on December 20, 2006

Call the number: If you answer the questions "right," your wait time goes down by 3 minutes. If you answer wrong, it bumps up 3 minutes.

I got it down to zero pretty easily ... it's ringing.

... ringing ...

... ringing ...

... ringing ...

dial tone. aw, shucks. i wanted to leave a message for Summer.
posted by mrgrimm at 1:31 PM on December 20, 2006

hey, mongonikol. where do you work at macrodobia? my gf works there too ...
posted by mrgrimm at 1:34 PM on December 20, 2006

the girl in position 9 is using an awful lot of toilet paper
posted by lilafain at 5:32 AM on December 21, 2006

“Do you procrastinate often?”
*puts phone on hold for an indeterminate length of time*
*visits toilet*
*goes to lunch*
Presses #2
(I don’t care if it’s good/bad - self-amusement is priceless)
posted by Smedleyman at 1:02 PM on December 21, 2006