Great f*cking movie
March 1, 2007 3:27 PM   Subscribe

The Departed: Edited Version [language NSFW, slightly]
posted by psmealey (73 comments total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
 
Fuck, it must be Friday YouTube free-for-all! Do I get to post my Caribbean homage to Inland Empire?
posted by muckster at 3:32 PM on March 1, 2007


fucking-eh
posted by growabrain at 3:33 PM on March 1, 2007


m-fuckin-eh
posted by googly at 3:37 PM on March 1, 2007


so they're implying it didn't deserve Oscars because it had a lot of "fucks" in it?

I heard it didn't deserve the Oscars because it was a pretty average movie, but then i didn't actually see it.
posted by drjimmy11 at 3:43 PM on March 1, 2007


Yup, that about sums it up.
posted by ageispolis at 3:43 PM on March 1, 2007




Oh, and I totally knew it isn't Friday. I mean, what kind of person wouldn't know that?

List of films that most frequently use the word "fuck"
posted by muckster at 3:53 PM on March 1, 2007


(see also)
posted by ColdChef at 3:53 PM on March 1, 2007


Way to go. Now the word "fuckin" has lost all meaning to me.
posted by fidgets at 4:00 PM on March 1, 2007


yes, been there, but I still have to giggle.
posted by kolophon at 4:02 PM on March 1, 2007


Left it in a back tab for a while, switched back, watched for a bit and suddenly found it hilarious.

Great way to ridicule a film.
posted by jouke at 4:03 PM on March 1, 2007


Thanks - just another example of how Hollywood values are completely opposed to American values. And they wonder why we hate them.
posted by Flashman at 4:04 PM on March 1, 2007


Somebody should do this for Pursuit of Happiness, except just the scenes of Will Smith running. That would be about 60% of the movie. The stupid, stupid movie.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 4:05 PM on March 1, 2007 [2 favorites]


It began to sound like chickens after a while.
posted by nj_subgenius at 4:10 PM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]


Flashman; I would like to subscribe to your newsletter. God be with you!
posted by odinsdream at 4:14 PM on March 1, 2007 [2 favorites]


Not as good as the Deadwood one.
posted by dobbs at 4:21 PM on March 1, 2007


"Thanks - just another example of how Hollywood values are completely opposed to American values. And they wonder why we hate them."

If I know who you meant by "they", "we", and "them", we might, might not, or would have to think about agreeing or disagreeing with you and/or them.
posted by HuronBob at 4:26 PM on March 1, 2007 [2 favorites]


Wicked pissa fuck!
posted by ericb at 4:29 PM on March 1, 2007


"And they wonder why we hate them"

Now that I think about it, since a real Christian American with good old American Values wouldn't actually "hate" a group, and state so on the internet, I can only assume that you're one of those Hollywood heathens talking about the good old fundamentalist right wing!
posted by HuronBob at 4:29 PM on March 1, 2007


I really enjoyed The Departed.

And that's about all I have to contribute here.
posted by kbanas at 4:31 PM on March 1, 2007


just another example of how Hollywood values are completely opposed to American values

*snickers*
posted by ericb at 4:32 PM on March 1, 2007


So they say fuck a lot! If anyone's really surprised by this then they should count how many times they say fuck in the average day (unless they're a nun.) Then count on a really stressful one. I tried this once and I discovered that I really am a foul-mouthed little fucker at the best of times.
posted by ob at 4:32 PM on March 1, 2007


Do we need to do this again?
posted by Eideteker at 4:35 PM on March 1, 2007


BTW -- can someone please explain to me what comprises "Hollywood Values." And while you're at it what is this so-called "Gay Agenda?" I asked Ted Haggard, James Guckhart/Jeff Gannon and Mark Foley, but they were mum on the topic.
posted by ericb at 4:36 PM on March 1, 2007


asked Ted Haggard, James Guckhart/Jeff Gannon and Mark Foley, but they were mum on the topic.

It's impolite to talk with your mouth full.
posted by ColdChef at 4:40 PM on March 1, 2007


I asked Ted Haggard, James Guckhart/Jeff Gannon and Mark Foley, but they were mum on the topic.

You mean they had their mouths full.
posted by maxwelton at 4:41 PM on March 1, 2007


Hm, what's an appropriate epithet to my lack of speed?

Er...fu...fuck?
posted by maxwelton at 4:42 PM on March 1, 2007 [2 favorites]


Burn.
posted by ColdChef at 4:42 PM on March 1, 2007


I haven't seen the film, though after that I get the gist. What it tells me is that I say fuck wrong. I always raise my voice when I say fuck. According to these actors, fuck should be said quietly, when it is just two men in a bar it should almost be whispered (women, sorry, the woman seems to just kind of breathe the word rather than say it). The only time you raise your voice to say fuck is when there are more than four other men in the room, when those four other men are fighting, or when you are in the last twenty minutes of the movie. It's OK to scream it at another man if you are on a rooftop. I'm really going to have to fucking work on this now.
posted by Elmore at 4:43 PM on March 1, 2007


The Homosexual Agenda Revealed!
posted by kirkaracha at 4:44 PM on March 1, 2007


When Do Papers Print the F-Word?
posted by ericb at 4:54 PM on March 1, 2007


Argh. Am I the only one that is constantly annoyed by people that have no concept of preserving the correct aspect ratio of a clip?
posted by Rhomboid at 4:57 PM on March 1, 2007


The Homosexual Agenda Revealed!
"Never again shall we be surprised by what these malevolent Nancy Boys are up to. While they may still be able to surprise us with a cunningly perfect piece of Chinese porcelain for our Biederimeier end-table, they will never again be able to surreptitiously take over our culture, families and prime-time television without God-fearing Christians being one step ahead of them! Praise the Lord!"
Halleluia!

From that Betty Bowers (ahem) website: What Would Jesus Wear? (01.20.09 -- The End of An Error).
posted by ericb at 4:58 PM on March 1, 2007


I really enjoyed The Departed.

And that's about all I have to contribute here.
posted by kbanas at 7:31 PM EST on March 1


I really enjoyed Infernal Affairs. So I've been reluctant to watch the adaptation, but I might. I just might. I've enjoyed some, but not all, of Martin's films.

Certainly some great directors have made great adaptations. I love Yojimbo and I love the adaptation, A Fist Full of Dollars. Same goes for Seven Samurai and Magnificent Seven, not to mention Insomnia and Insomnia.

Is is that sort of adaptation. The answer lies in viewing it.

I don't say fuck much but I'm in fear of saying fuck if I watch this film.
posted by juiceCake at 4:59 PM on March 1, 2007


Thanks - just another example of how Hollywood values are completely opposed to American values. And they wonder why we hate them.

The main value that I share with Hollywood is that the word fuck should be used constantly, with great gusto and good fucking will, in front of children, old fucking women and those fucking members of the clergy as can be persuaded to stop their illicit fucking for five fucking minutes and pay fucking attention. God fucking bless.
posted by Divine_Wino at 5:03 PM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]


Now my appetite is damp.
posted by carsonb at 5:20 PM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]


It's not done in 30 seconds by bunnies, is it?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 5:27 PM on March 1, 2007


the departed was good up until the natural ending. But after that, it sucked.
posted by delmoi at 5:46 PM on March 1, 2007


I liked it. Having grown up in New England I always get a kick out of seeing big Hollywood Stars try to put on the Boston accent. For the most part, they were pretty good. A few notes, however:
  • DiCaprio's Southie brogue was not bad at all for a first-timer, he slipped a couple of times but actually pulled it off pretty well.
  • It was actually amusing to see Martin Sheen try a Boston accent that wasn't the Kennedy accent f'r a change.
  • Nicholson's accent wasn't even close, but it did help pull him out of his regular speech cadence, which had become a distraction in the last, say, 20 years.
  • On balance though, Nicholson's Boston accent was better than Ray Liotta's weak attempt at an New York accent in Goodfellas. Oddly enough, Liotta is from Jersey and speaks with a natural Jersey accent, but for some odd reason, he could not get the hang of the outer boroughs NYC accent at all.

posted by psmealey at 6:04 PM on March 1, 2007 [1 favorite]


The Departed wasn't awful, but I've seen episodes of The Wire that were better. Way better.

I wish someone could explain the appeal of Little Miss Sunshine though, because that was hideous. And unfunny. Possibly the most overrated film I have ever seen.
posted by vronsky at 6:22 PM on March 1, 2007


George Carlin's History of the Word "Fuck." This bit never gets old.
posted by inconsequentialist at 6:22 PM on March 1, 2007


inconsequentialist: It wasn't George Carlin, nor is it Monty Python as it's occasionally credited to.

It's Jack Wagner, the "voice of Disneyland".

You can tell I've had this fucking argument before, can't you?
posted by Remy at 7:49 PM on March 1, 2007


Fucked that up nicely, didn't I.
posted by Remy at 7:50 PM on March 1, 2007


Hilarious! Thanks for the smiles.
posted by nickyskye at 7:54 PM on March 1, 2007


It's actually Gone in Sixty Seconds done by bunnies.

It's actually Gone in Sixty Seconds done by bunnies.
posted by staggernation at 8:13 PM on March 1, 2007


juiceCake - I really enjoyed Infernal Affairs. So I've been reluctant to watch the adaptation, but I might.

My sister (for all practical intents is essentally Chinese-born-Canadian) thought that The Departed was better than Mao Gan Dao/Wu Jian Dao. She stole my copy of Internal Affairs before I got to see it so I can't comment.
posted by porpoise at 8:33 PM on March 1, 2007


juiceCake: I loved Infernal Affairs and, honestly, would prefer it to The Departed - but I would still recommend seeing The Departed, if only for Wahlberg's ferocious ARGH! performance. I think Sorcese's ending was kinda cool, but I think Infernal Affair's ending was exceptional. They're very different. And I'm refering to the dramatic ending, not the coda, if that makes sense. I'm trying to be spoiler-free here.
posted by stinkycheese at 9:30 PM on March 1, 2007


I wish someone could explain the appeal of Little Miss Sunshine...

Basically, it's an American movie that doesn't totally suck. Until the ending. Then it totally sucks.
posted by mazola at 10:55 PM on March 1, 2007


I wish someone could explain the appeal of Little Miss Sunshine though, because that was hideous. And unfunny. Possibly the most overrated film I have ever seen.

*shrug* I laughed quite a bit throughout and thought it was very well done.
posted by the other side at 11:18 PM on March 1, 2007


I liked both Infernal Affairs and The Departed.

The thing is, the Chinese film Infernal Affairs starts off with two younger actors playing the protagonists, then jumps several years later to where we see they have already risen in the ranks of the police and mob. This period with the younger actors is covered in Infernal Affairs 2. And at the end of The Departed there is a set of recordings and that corresponds with a plot point of Infernal Affairs 3. So The Departed is sort of a remake of the entire trilogy, which disappoints me in that IA2 and IA3 are good films that suffered in that it wasn't originally planned as a trilogy, and I wished they had just gone ahead and remade the trilogy, as I thought that IA3 is a bit of a diamond in the rough that could of been improved by a remake.

And while I like The Departed, I was disappointed it lost some of the religious aspect of Infernal Affairs, that there is an inference that the characters are actually in a form of Buddhist hell and suffering for their sins by reliving their lives.
posted by bobo123 at 11:59 PM on March 1, 2007


Is there any actual fucking in the movie? Or are they all talk?
posted by pracowity at 4:41 AM on March 2, 2007


I wish someone could explain the appeal of Little Miss Sunshine...

It's basically Vacation, with pathos.

Actually I enjoyed LMS quite a bit. I thought it was actually a better movie though and through than the Departed (or the Queen, the only other nominated film I saw this year). I guess karmically speaking, the Academy to atone for inexplicably favoring Kevin Costner and Dances with Wolves over Marty and Goodfellas in 1990.
posted by psmealey at 4:42 AM on March 2, 2007


Is there any actual fucking in the movie?

There's some fucking, not a lot. Basically the Damon fucker is not a particularly good at fucking so his fucking girlfriend fucks the DiCaprio fucker. In the end, though, DiCaprio gets fucked.
posted by psmealey at 4:43 AM on March 2, 2007


Not as good as the Deadwood one.

I find it interesting that the person who put that together didn't include the frankly awesome "cunt" speech given by Wild Bill when he's finally done with being harassed by his eventual assassin.
posted by dreamsign at 4:45 AM on March 2, 2007


and kolophon, I read the donkey-fucker thread, skipped over to this one, went and got myself a drink and promptly forgot that I had switched threads, and then proceeded to almost spit up beer when I read your comment.
posted by dreamsign at 4:46 AM on March 2, 2007


Holy crap, Remy, that IS Jack Wagner! I may never be able to listen to the announcements at Disneyland with a straight face again.
posted by litlnemo at 5:22 AM on March 2, 2007


Holy crap, Remy, that IS Jack Wagner!

That is hysterical. Almost as funny as Ghetto Delta Airlines Commercial.

What's really funny to me about the Jack Wagner bit is that it ever saw the light of day. A buddy of mine used to do audio production for corporate videos, and he worked with some fairly prominent voice-over actors. He told me that, to a man, all these guys had very twisted senses of humor, and they would invariably do extremely profane and dirty versions of the copy they were being paid to read, just for fun. Only thing was that they insisted that the recordings all be erased before leaving the studio, just to protect their "brand", I suppose.

That's what's so crazy about the Definition of the Word: Fuck thing. Can't believe Wagner let it get out there.
posted by psmealey at 5:50 AM on March 2, 2007


well fuck me
posted by vronsky at 7:50 AM on March 2, 2007



Thanks - just another example of how Hollywood values are completely opposed to American values. And they wonder why we hate them.


WTF?
posted by pwedza at 9:01 AM on March 2, 2007


you have to admit that the movie industry really knows how to spit in someone's face -- they hate Scorsese so much that they denied him an Oscar for 35 years, masterpiece after masterpiece ending up empty-handed, and they waited until he made a really bad, bad, commercial movie, essentially a graceless caricature of everything that's great and unique and unforgettable about his work and his monster talent, and then, just then, they gave him the fucking Oscar.

poor Scorsese -- a scholar of cinema, not just a genius of a director, he must know deep in his heart how bad The Departed really is. And he had to show up, and pick up that little golden dude. Mean Streets? Nah. Alice? Raging Bull? Nope.

Alec Baldwin, Marky Mark, Di Caprio playing caricatures of their personas, Martin Sheen playing the good guy who's clearly going to turn up dead in the last reel, and poor USDAPrime Matt Damon pretending to be a bad guy? Damn, give the man an Oscar!

hat's off, really. but then, the film industry as a whole has always been scarier than Scorsese's gangsters.
posted by matteo at 9:59 AM on March 2, 2007 [2 favorites]


(and they waited until the rotten Scent of a Woman to give Pacino his Oscar, too, for Chrissakes)
posted by matteo at 10:01 AM on March 2, 2007


(and they waited until the rotten Scent of a Woman to give Pacino his Oscar, too, for Chrissakes)

Pacino is an inveterate over-actor. They might as well have given him his award for his cheesiest performance ever.
posted by psmealey at 10:13 AM on March 2, 2007


Well it was better than Gangs and the Aviator. And the first time he hasn't seriously miscast DeCaprio. I'll give it that.

"not just a genius of a director'

shouldn't that read ex genius?
posted by vronsky at 10:14 AM on March 2, 2007


But knowing you matteo, you probably stood up and cheered when LMS won best original screenplay.
posted by vronsky at 10:22 AM on March 2, 2007


Pacino is an inveterate over-actor

if you're only familiar with his last decade of work, obviously. thankfully, he's been working for a bit longer than that.

funnily enough, Pacino almost got fired from the Godfather because the money men said he wasn't acting enough, he was just too subdued.

ex genius?

Gangs of New York is only six years old. As of now, The Departed is just a bad mistake -- quandoque bonus dormitat Homerus, and all that. God knows Scorsese, of all people, can afford one bad film every once in a while.
posted by matteo at 10:28 AM on March 2, 2007


thankfully, he's been working for a bit longer than that.

He seemed pretty over the top to me in Dog Day Afternoon and Serpico, but could be that I'm remembering that through the lens of his later work.
posted by psmealey at 10:33 AM on March 2, 2007


quandoque bonus dormitat Homerus

fair enough.

Personally I loved Life Lessons. Of course Rosanna at her most bewitching didn't hurt.
posted by vronsky at 11:01 AM on March 2, 2007


Pacino is an inveterate over-actor.

Hoo Haa!
posted by Flashman at 11:14 AM on March 2, 2007


Scent of a Woman was the beginning (and namesake) of Pacino's Hoo-Ha! Period.
Cause she's got a great ass--and you got your head all the way up it! Ferocious, aren't I?
posted by kirkaracha at 11:14 AM on March 2, 2007


Warner Bros. has the screenplay of The Departed available for download.
posted by muckster at 3:43 PM on March 2, 2007


And here's Pan's Labyrinth.
posted by muckster at 3:48 PM on March 2, 2007


Pacino is an inveterate over-actor. They might as well have given him his award for his cheesiest performance ever.

Fuck you. Fucking shiva handed this guy a million dollars, told him 'Sign the deal' he wouldn't sign. And the god Vishnu, too, into the barga-- Fuck you, John. You know your business, I know mine. Your business is being an asshole. I find out whose fucking cousin you are, I'm gonna go to him and figure out a way to have your ass-- fuck you!

/waiting for the new leads
posted by dreamsign at 11:45 PM on March 2, 2007


Ok, I finally got to see Infernal Affairs (in the original Cantonese vs. dubbed English).

The original HK film is far better than The Departed. Far.

Vastly far.

Although I kinda resented the recycled scene from Hardboiled; same actor, same scene, just a different fit/theme music.)
posted by porpoise at 9:39 PM on March 3, 2007


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