He weighs as much as the top three females--combined
April 8, 2007 3:26 PM Subscribe
Any MeFis running Boston a week from tomorrow? Good luck! And I hope you at least beat this guy (who I'm sure will become another paragraph in the race's colorful history).
"Boston" and "colorful history" in the same post - what will they think of next?
posted by phaedon at 3:49 PM on April 8, 2007
posted by phaedon at 3:49 PM on April 8, 2007
Possibly the greatest Boston Experience: Hit the bar at 8am, the Sox game at 10:30, exit Fenway to meet the runners in Kenmore, pick out random runners and call out their number. Continue to drink as much as possible, as long as possible. Last one standing wins.
That's *my* Boston Marathon. (One I've won!)
posted by Banky_Edwards at 3:50 PM on April 8, 2007
That's *my* Boston Marathon. (One I've won!)
posted by Banky_Edwards at 3:50 PM on April 8, 2007
I didn't think anybody was running Boston since this.
I'm moderately ashamed of myself.
posted by wendell at 4:15 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
I'm moderately ashamed of myself.
posted by wendell at 4:15 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
as well you should be. I hope as punishment, you get no foreplay for a long time.
posted by stenseng at 4:25 PM on April 8, 2007
posted by stenseng at 4:25 PM on April 8, 2007
I'm not running, but NASA astronaut Sunita Williams (bib number 14,000) will be taking my place -- running in place on a treadmill on the International Space Station.
posted by ericb at 4:42 PM on April 8, 2007
posted by ericb at 4:42 PM on April 8, 2007
"Boston represents a sacred goal," wrote one high-minded runner. "Boston should be reserved for top athletes, which is not you."
This guy must be a local.
posted by mykescipark at 4:58 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
This guy must be a local.
posted by mykescipark at 4:58 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
mykescipark: That quote is taken from the first entry in the Jacob's Death Threats section. In context, I kind of see his point. But it's a noble effort nonetheless.
posted by anarcation at 5:35 PM on April 8, 2007
posted by anarcation at 5:35 PM on April 8, 2007
*sniff* *sob* no, I'm not running it.
Good thing, too, since at this point in my retirement my money would be on the big guy.
It is, however, a race that is near and dear to my heart for many reasons. In fact, it's pretty much the only thing about Boston that I find redeems the place. I used to represent the BAA as a competitive runner and had my highest finish there (18th overall in the female division) . It was my second to last race ever, so it was a bittersweet moment in retrospect.
Great race, super organization fantastic history, challenging course and an amazing number of spectators. As Banky Edwards notes. The crowds that surge out of the Fenway line the course 12-20 deep right at the last mile. Quite the adrenaline rush, and the volume is deafening-there's nothing more vocal than a Boston drunk.
Side note as a human interest story- about two or three years ago I was contacted by a producer for OLN through the suggestion of the BAA marketing director. OLN was interested in doing a piece on Rosie Ruiz and what it actually takes to race a marathon, and thought I might be interested not only in running parts of the course while explaining pacing and the physiology of marathon racing, but playing Rosie as well, in their docudrama of her hoax. (??!) It all sounded a bit suspect to me, so after much back and forth the project was killed, although I believe the Ruiz piece ended up running (no pun intended) after all.
Yes, kids, that is the glory all those years of training (almost) earned me!
posted by stagewhisper at 5:39 PM on April 8, 2007 [3 favorites]
Good thing, too, since at this point in my retirement my money would be on the big guy.
It is, however, a race that is near and dear to my heart for many reasons. In fact, it's pretty much the only thing about Boston that I find redeems the place. I used to represent the BAA as a competitive runner and had my highest finish there (18th overall in the female division) . It was my second to last race ever, so it was a bittersweet moment in retrospect.
Great race, super organization fantastic history, challenging course and an amazing number of spectators. As Banky Edwards notes. The crowds that surge out of the Fenway line the course 12-20 deep right at the last mile. Quite the adrenaline rush, and the volume is deafening-there's nothing more vocal than a Boston drunk.
Side note as a human interest story- about two or three years ago I was contacted by a producer for OLN through the suggestion of the BAA marketing director. OLN was interested in doing a piece on Rosie Ruiz and what it actually takes to race a marathon, and thought I might be interested not only in running parts of the course while explaining pacing and the physiology of marathon racing, but playing Rosie as well, in their docudrama of her hoax. (??!) It all sounded a bit suspect to me, so after much back and forth the project was killed, although I believe the Ruiz piece ended up running (no pun intended) after all.
Yes, kids, that is the glory all those years of training (almost) earned me!
posted by stagewhisper at 5:39 PM on April 8, 2007 [3 favorites]
Yeah... didn't qualify this year. Perhaps next year... if I can run a 3:11 (!!!!!) to qualify.
posted by ph00dz at 7:32 PM on April 8, 2007
posted by ph00dz at 7:32 PM on April 8, 2007
Even if it takes that guy seven hours, running or walking that distance is a huge accomplishment. Running when you know that there are people out there who are laughing at you and wishing you ill takes serious huevos.
What sort of person says, "Hey obese person who is taking positive steps to become healthier! You should stop running and go die. . . because you're fat!"
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 7:33 PM on April 8, 2007
What sort of person says, "Hey obese person who is taking positive steps to become healthier! You should stop running and go die. . . because you're fat!"
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 7:33 PM on April 8, 2007
What sort of person says, "Hey obese person who is taking positive steps to become healthier! You should stop running and go die. . . because you're fat!"
A moron.
posted by gomichild at 8:14 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
A moron.
posted by gomichild at 8:14 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
That's bad ass, stagewhisper.
Nah... you know what, freshwater and gomichild -- I've gotta side with the "high minded runner." I mean, really... I think it's great that that dude wants to get out and do a marathon, but Boston? That really is kind of sacrilegious to those of us who work our asses off to try and qualify for that race.
It's also really irresponsible. The Boston Marathon is a serious event for serious athletes. Unregistered runners -- aka "bandits" -- like that just put added strain on the hardworking volunteers and medical staff... and to what end?
There are plenty of walker friendly marathons that guy would be more than welcome at.
posted by ph00dz at 9:14 PM on April 8, 2007
Nah... you know what, freshwater and gomichild -- I've gotta side with the "high minded runner." I mean, really... I think it's great that that dude wants to get out and do a marathon, but Boston? That really is kind of sacrilegious to those of us who work our asses off to try and qualify for that race.
It's also really irresponsible. The Boston Marathon is a serious event for serious athletes. Unregistered runners -- aka "bandits" -- like that just put added strain on the hardworking volunteers and medical staff... and to what end?
There are plenty of walker friendly marathons that guy would be more than welcome at.
posted by ph00dz at 9:14 PM on April 8, 2007
"It is nothing against you personally, but you are the guy who cuts in line to the detriment of everyone behind you."
Except that he's not actually an official participant, but merely running along the same route at the back with the other non-participants. But other than that, yeah, spot on dude. Fucking idiot.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 9:23 PM on April 8, 2007
Except that he's not actually an official participant, but merely running along the same route at the back with the other non-participants. But other than that, yeah, spot on dude. Fucking idiot.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 9:23 PM on April 8, 2007
I'm a runner who was born and raised in Boston, Mass. I'm not an elite athlete, but one of my short-term goals is to qualify and complete the Boston Marathon. The day I cross that finish line will be one of the best days of my life.
When I cross that finish line, I'll have worked so hard I doubt that I'll have the energy to get pissy because some dude who radically changed his diet and lifestyle and spent up to five hours a day exercising was running somewhere behind me. It sure as hell won't make it any less special.
Every year, bandits trail behind the qualifiers. This is the first year I've ever heard anyone hope that one of those bandits would die, or heard that some of those people don't deserve to participate. The internet really does make us stupid.
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 11:09 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
When I cross that finish line, I'll have worked so hard I doubt that I'll have the energy to get pissy because some dude who radically changed his diet and lifestyle and spent up to five hours a day exercising was running somewhere behind me. It sure as hell won't make it any less special.
Every year, bandits trail behind the qualifiers. This is the first year I've ever heard anyone hope that one of those bandits would die, or heard that some of those people don't deserve to participate. The internet really does make us stupid.
posted by freshwater_pr0n at 11:09 PM on April 8, 2007 [1 favorite]
"I hope a gas main breaks near your house, and the explosion causes your entire family to die and you to be parallyzed from the neck down."
That may be the best random and mean-spirited email I've seen.
posted by Citizen Premier at 12:31 AM on April 9, 2007
That may be the best random and mean-spirited email I've seen.
posted by Citizen Premier at 12:31 AM on April 9, 2007
Boston Marathon/Patriot Day meetup? Bukowski is right around the corner from the finish line, but it's small and I bet it'll be packed in there.
posted by Plutor at 6:48 AM on April 9, 2007
posted by Plutor at 6:48 AM on April 9, 2007
I guess you guys were looking at his death threats board. Wassup with that?
Freshwater -- I hear you and you're not wrong at all. I mean, wtf do I care who finishes behind me? It's not like I'm ever going to win one of these things, so really, it's hard to get too worked up, when I'm just competing with myself.
At the same time, though, marathons are community events with limited resources. If nutballs like this are out running around, potentially risking their lives in a race like Boston which is purposely not set up to handle people like that, then that means there are fewer medical, etc... resources out there for the people who legitimately paid/qualified for the event. Bandits might seem like they're just trailing behind in the parade, but they actually cause many more problems than you might imagine.
Frankly, I think it's just selfish.
Anyway, Jacob -- if you're out there, I salute you for your efforts, but you should choose a different race. I would encourage you to join me in Portland or something this year. You'll find a much warmer reception and be welcomed as a brother instead of treated like a fool.
posted by ph00dz at 6:50 AM on April 9, 2007
Freshwater -- I hear you and you're not wrong at all. I mean, wtf do I care who finishes behind me? It's not like I'm ever going to win one of these things, so really, it's hard to get too worked up, when I'm just competing with myself.
At the same time, though, marathons are community events with limited resources. If nutballs like this are out running around, potentially risking their lives in a race like Boston which is purposely not set up to handle people like that, then that means there are fewer medical, etc... resources out there for the people who legitimately paid/qualified for the event. Bandits might seem like they're just trailing behind in the parade, but they actually cause many more problems than you might imagine.
Frankly, I think it's just selfish.
Anyway, Jacob -- if you're out there, I salute you for your efforts, but you should choose a different race. I would encourage you to join me in Portland or something this year. You'll find a much warmer reception and be welcomed as a brother instead of treated like a fool.
posted by ph00dz at 6:50 AM on April 9, 2007
I am with ph00dz on this, banditing races, *any* race, is akin to shoplifting. Before anyone accuses me of holding an elitist attitude, let me explain that I apply the same disdain to fast runners who decide they'd like to run road races unregistered and unpaid for as workouts or training runs. (There are a few bad apples who do this, so I am not picking on the slower runners).
The bandits at Boston are *not* happily accepted or tacitly encouraged by the BAA. The fact that it has been impossible to control or fully discourage their insistence on forcing their way into the race should not be read as tacit approval. It's vile that people are sending death threats to this man, but that doesn't excuse the hubris and sense of entitlement that he and other non-registered runners exercise by pulling this stunt.
ph00dz nails the crux of the issue here:
At the same time, though, marathons are community events with limited resources. If nutballs like this are out running around, potentially risking their lives in a race like Boston which is purposely not set up to handle people like that, then that means there are fewer medical, etc... resources out there for the people who legitimately paid/qualified for the event. Bandits might seem like they're just trailing behind in the parade, but they actually cause many more problems than you might imagine.
Banditing is an extremely selfish act. Boston fairly recently began allowing charity runners into the race, much to the dismay of some purists, but at least the charity runners earn their spot on the course despite not having run a qualifying time by giving back to a larger community. In addition, charity runners go through training programs that are designed to help them reach the finish in one piece, explain race etiquette, and in essence teach them how to be decent members of the larger running community. Likewise, the Boston marathon usually provides a limited number of entries to area running clubs to award to their members who may not be able to qualify on time, but have shown a commitment to the running community (for example, through volunteer work, diligent hard work and training, etc.)
If someone really dreams of running Boston but is unlikely to earn a position through leg speed, they can always earn a place at the start by putting something into the sport itself. Sadly, for most of these bandits it's about self-aggrandizement more than any love for marathoning or respect for the race.
posted by stagewhisper at 8:53 AM on April 9, 2007
The bandits at Boston are *not* happily accepted or tacitly encouraged by the BAA. The fact that it has been impossible to control or fully discourage their insistence on forcing their way into the race should not be read as tacit approval. It's vile that people are sending death threats to this man, but that doesn't excuse the hubris and sense of entitlement that he and other non-registered runners exercise by pulling this stunt.
ph00dz nails the crux of the issue here:
At the same time, though, marathons are community events with limited resources. If nutballs like this are out running around, potentially risking their lives in a race like Boston which is purposely not set up to handle people like that, then that means there are fewer medical, etc... resources out there for the people who legitimately paid/qualified for the event. Bandits might seem like they're just trailing behind in the parade, but they actually cause many more problems than you might imagine.
Banditing is an extremely selfish act. Boston fairly recently began allowing charity runners into the race, much to the dismay of some purists, but at least the charity runners earn their spot on the course despite not having run a qualifying time by giving back to a larger community. In addition, charity runners go through training programs that are designed to help them reach the finish in one piece, explain race etiquette, and in essence teach them how to be decent members of the larger running community. Likewise, the Boston marathon usually provides a limited number of entries to area running clubs to award to their members who may not be able to qualify on time, but have shown a commitment to the running community (for example, through volunteer work, diligent hard work and training, etc.)
If someone really dreams of running Boston but is unlikely to earn a position through leg speed, they can always earn a place at the start by putting something into the sport itself. Sadly, for most of these bandits it's about self-aggrandizement more than any love for marathoning or respect for the race.
posted by stagewhisper at 8:53 AM on April 9, 2007
"Except that he's not actually an official participant, but merely running along the same route at the back with the other non-participants. But other than that, yeah, spot on dude. Fucking idiot."
Civil Disobedient, I'm not sure what part of this you don't get, so I'll spell it out. These bandits *do* interfere with the race and the other participants. Qualifying times get slower as one ages. Many of the bandits end up clogging up the roads (especially in the first part of the race, since they generally have no sense of pacing) near the back of the pack where a lot of the age group runners compete. They take water and use medical help (the latter fairly often given their relative fitness and experience) that should be spent on the qualified entrants. It's a HUGE problem. Try applying the ethics test of "what if everyone did this?" and see if you can grasp why this is wrong.
posted by stagewhisper at 9:02 AM on April 9, 2007
Civil Disobedient, I'm not sure what part of this you don't get, so I'll spell it out. These bandits *do* interfere with the race and the other participants. Qualifying times get slower as one ages. Many of the bandits end up clogging up the roads (especially in the first part of the race, since they generally have no sense of pacing) near the back of the pack where a lot of the age group runners compete. They take water and use medical help (the latter fairly often given their relative fitness and experience) that should be spent on the qualified entrants. It's a HUGE problem. Try applying the ethics test of "what if everyone did this?" and see if you can grasp why this is wrong.
posted by stagewhisper at 9:02 AM on April 9, 2007
Many of the bandits end up clogging up the roads (especially in the first part of the race, since they generally have no sense of pacing) near the back of the pack where a lot of the age group runners compete.
The start of the race in Hopkinton is on a two-lane town road and it's very crowded (1, 2, 3, 4). "Bandits" do muck-up the flow at the start and early miles of the race for qualified age group runners.
posted by ericb at 9:56 AM on April 9, 2007
The start of the race in Hopkinton is on a two-lane town road and it's very crowded (1, 2, 3, 4). "Bandits" do muck-up the flow at the start and early miles of the race for qualified age group runners.
posted by ericb at 9:56 AM on April 9, 2007
I think that the bandit issue is really of secondary importance here. He is not even close to being in the shape to complete the race and is risking serious permanent injury to himself in trying to complete it at this point.
The knee swelling after his nine mile run was a big warning from his body and he does risk serious permanent injury if that reoccurs and he somehow convinces himself to push on through the pain.
Running is something that he can do for a lifetime-- if he gives himself a chance. He has already experienced some major benefits in his day to day life.
Completing the 2007 Boston Marathon, a one time accomplishment, would undoubtedly feel good, but it won't magically change his life, and risks an injury which will completely offset all the benefits he has gained.
posted by notmtwain at 6:44 PM on April 9, 2007
The knee swelling after his nine mile run was a big warning from his body and he does risk serious permanent injury if that reoccurs and he somehow convinces himself to push on through the pain.
Running is something that he can do for a lifetime-- if he gives himself a chance. He has already experienced some major benefits in his day to day life.
Completing the 2007 Boston Marathon, a one time accomplishment, would undoubtedly feel good, but it won't magically change his life, and risks an injury which will completely offset all the benefits he has gained.
posted by notmtwain at 6:44 PM on April 9, 2007
[He]is risking serious permanent injury to himself in trying to complete it at this point."
Exactly what I was thinking. I can speak from personal experience that there are some pretty painful overuse injuries waiting for you in distance running if you are impatient.
posted by aliasless at 10:26 PM on April 9, 2007
Exactly what I was thinking. I can speak from personal experience that there are some pretty painful overuse injuries waiting for you in distance running if you are impatient.
posted by aliasless at 10:26 PM on April 9, 2007
"I started to hit a wall around mile 11. It was actually closer to a mountain. Cardio wasn't an issue at all. It was joints, all the time." -- from his blog.
He did finish -- albeit in last place!
posted by ericb at 5:03 PM on April 17, 2007
He did finish -- albeit in last place!
posted by ericb at 5:03 PM on April 17, 2007
he ran? that distance? in that town? on that day? in that weather? at that weight?
he's a hero, not a zero !!!
posted by seawallrunner at 5:14 PM on April 17, 2007
he's a hero, not a zero !!!
posted by seawallrunner at 5:14 PM on April 17, 2007
What ph00dz is saying.
There are lots of other races. Pick a marathon that you qualify for, or go all out and get a ticket to the Olympic 10,000 meters, jump on the track naked and tail the competitors there. Still, great work losing the weight and making it to the end.
posted by drpynchon at 7:15 PM on April 17, 2007
There are lots of other races. Pick a marathon that you qualify for, or go all out and get a ticket to the Olympic 10,000 meters, jump on the track naked and tail the competitors there. Still, great work losing the weight and making it to the end.
posted by drpynchon at 7:15 PM on April 17, 2007
« Older the goverment owes you $60 | Vibraphone Orchestra Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by papakwanz at 3:38 PM on April 8, 2007