Reunited and it feels so... just... ewwwwww.
May 14, 2007 1:54 PM   Subscribe

WTFfilter: remember smarmy former-mechanic Joey Buttafuoco and "Long Island Lolita" Amy Fisher? Yeah? Well... looks like they're rekindling their storybook romance for reality television. They're a cute couple. I wish them well.
posted by miss lynnster (46 comments total)
Yes, that was sarcasm. Cuz... ick.
posted by miss lynnster at 1:59 PM on May 14, 2007

She shot the wrong person in the face. [NOT FACE-SHOOTINGIST]
posted by Mister_A at 2:01 PM on May 14, 2007

You know who else shot the wrong person in the face?
posted by eriko at 2:02 PM on May 14, 2007

Dick Cheney?
posted by Justinian at 2:03 PM on May 14, 2007 [1 favorite]

A long time ago Comedy Central, when it was in that early period many cable networks have during which they feel they can get away with being awesome, before they suffer a change in overlord and start blanding everything down, had a comedy bit they played in frequent rotation in with their commercials. It was a song, written in response to the news blitz around the guy, that went roughly:

"Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Bada Bada Bada Bada Bada...
I don't wanna read a book about Joey Buttafuoco! I don't even wanna look at Joey Buttafuoco!"

Now these kinds of idiot media blitzes are old-hat, yet I don't feel particularly excited about renewing this one.
posted by JHarris at 2:03 PM on May 14, 2007

One of my favorite "dated" jokes of all time:

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Amy Fisher.
Amy Fisher wh[BANG!]
posted by ColdChef at 2:07 PM on May 14, 2007

only on Long Island...
posted by subaruwrx at 2:08 PM on May 14, 2007

If this doesn't convince people that American culture is headed the wrong direction, I don't know what will.
posted by HighTechUnderpants at 2:08 PM on May 14, 2007

As if reality show fans hadn't already surrendered their eternal souls...
posted by NationalKato at 2:12 PM on May 14, 2007

Ten years ago Joey & his wife tried moving to LA, thinking he was going to become a star. He got a night job as a bouncer at the Rainbow Room. I'd say the man is a toad, but toads don't really bug me.

I love that I can google my own stories now so I don't have to retell them. It's so efficient.
posted by miss lynnster at 2:12 PM on May 14, 2007

That was literally half Ms. Fisher's life ago. Buttafuoco must really be HUNG.
posted by davy at 2:15 PM on May 14, 2007

"I still have feelings for her," Buttafuoco says. "I can't wait to have dinner with her. I can't wait to be with her. I can't wait to touch her."

posted by mrballistic at 2:18 PM on May 14, 2007

I feel like I should shower after reading this post.

(Oh, and miss lynnster, that line about toads is awesome. I'm probably going to rip that off from you in the near future.)
posted by Dr-Baa at 2:29 PM on May 14, 2007

The man could possess the most amazing penis to ever grace this Earth, rays of heavenly light could emenate from it and his balls could have curative powers that would heal the sick and bring world peace, yet it still wouldn't make up for the fact that HE IS JOEY FREAKING BUTTAFUOCO. BLEEEECCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHH.
posted by miss lynnster at 2:36 PM on May 14, 2007 [2 favorites]

It would be really super-great reality television if they could have their date in Baghdad. Any TV execs here?
posted by Benny Andajetz at 2:38 PM on May 14, 2007

My, the imagery. Thank you!
posted by cavalier at 2:39 PM on May 14, 2007

For me this trio of wife, hubby, and cute slut was Americ a at its best. The wife, despite the scorn visited upon her, stood by her man, following the advice given via the song, and faithful she remained till the time when, alas, the couple split. Joe went to Hollywood, a fit place, now with an opeing after OJ had his troubles, but the screen was not ready for his talents and so he headed back to The Big Apple, where true love is always to be found. We know, Joey and Amy, that God will take care of you and bless you both with the happiness you so deserve.
posted by Postroad at 2:47 PM on May 14, 2007

MetaFilter says it hates reality shows, but 501 comments and counting says otherwise!
posted by hoverboards don't work on water at 2:52 PM on May 14, 2007

I think there must be a kind of X-Prize for disproving the Mencken aphorism the 'No-one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public'? Is there any other reason why someone would makes this? Surely it can't make money. Who's going to sponsor it? Dupont Kevlar?
posted by Jakey at 3:13 PM on May 14, 2007

I, for one, am awaiting the po-mo POV on this thread from user 45811.
posted by rob511 at 3:37 PM on May 14, 2007

Stop hurting metafilter.
posted by joe lisboa at 3:40 PM on May 14, 2007

Can Metafilter have a "percentage of Wikipedia links per article" barrier/limit?
posted by jscott at 3:41 PM on May 14, 2007


the question is, who am I referring to? buttafuoco and fisher, or the people that would earnestly watch this show?
posted by shmegegge at 3:47 PM on May 14, 2007

But...but...lolita and wifey made up on Oprah! I saw it! There were tears and everything. Even Oprah got that glimmer in her eye that she gets when she really really wants to cry but she can't because aliens don't have tear ducts.
posted by liquorice at 3:51 PM on May 14, 2007 [1 favorite]

How much y'think they're being paid to go on this date with each other?
posted by katillathehun at 3:59 PM on May 14, 2007

That was literally half Ms. Fisher's life ago. Buttafuoco must really be HUNG.

My money is on Butt-a-fuoco as an action verb instead of scale of measurement.
posted by Peter H at 4:06 PM on May 14, 2007

Um, I put two Wikipedia links out of five, so you can always skip to the third link the first two bug you. Could've been worse, I could've done a single link youtube post of this.
posted by miss lynnster at 4:12 PM on May 14, 2007



PLEASE LET ME DIE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#@@%%%^@!!!!$$!!!
posted by serazin at 4:38 PM on May 14, 2007

Hey, everyone loves money.
posted by delmoi at 4:47 PM on May 14, 2007

JHarris, I really, really wish I'd never heard of Amy Fisher.
Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco Buttafuoco
posted by Challahtronix at 5:17 PM on May 14, 2007 [1 favorite]

Wow, only 40 percent of your links were cheap lifts off of Wikipedia. Good for you, Mr. Murrow. There are so many excellent Amy Fisher/Buttafuoco writings out there; why waste time with Wikipedia... oh wait, it's easy.
posted by jscott at 5:22 PM on May 14, 2007

jscott - wtf?
posted by serazin at 5:25 PM on May 14, 2007

Good lord, Letterman's gonna start up that thing he did again.

Greeeaat. Next it'll be Gilooly.
posted by zoogleplex at 5:32 PM on May 14, 2007

I personally think that the reunion of Joey and Amy following transgressions of the marital institution really demonstrates the way that power circulates throughout the social network rather than functioning as an institutional/hierarchical instrumentality of oppression.

And don't even get me started on the way Joey's recalcitrant criminality shows the moral bankruptcy of panopticism as a form of discipline.
posted by Joey Buttafoucault at 6:48 PM on May 14, 2007 [4 favorites]

Have you been waiting since November 2006 for the right thread to comment in, Mr. Buttafoucault?
posted by rdr at 7:20 PM on May 14, 2007

Uhhh, jscott? Are we cranky & trying to pick a fight with me for some reason? Have I pissed you off somehow and you have decided to let me have it indirectly in this thread? Because that's all I can figure for your reaction.

See, I was at work today and had no time to internet surf so I did this one quick as soon as I read the news. I'll fully admit that I thought twice about the Wikipedia thing but I had to run into a meeting so I quickly added the Crime Library link there for more information. I figured the main part of the post would be the last two news links & that people would see that. This was basically a throwaway newsfilter post about two slimy people in pop culture, it was not written with the intention to win a Pulitzer prize. Admittedly, Joey Buttafuoco simply doesn't deserve the same effort as Peter Falk in my mind. Period.

But that aside? As I see it, you have done TWO POSTS in your years on Mefi. So I'm not sure you are someone who should be playing the expert on Mefi etiquette. I work pretty hard to make sure that my posts are generally pretty well written & well received, and I contribute pretty regularly. So if you could cut me some slack this ONE time, that would be nice. 'Cuz jeez. I've had an incredibly crap day, I'm a little down right now, and to be frank I simply don't deserve to be picked apart.

Okay? Yeah, thanks.

posted by miss lynnster at 7:30 PM on May 14, 2007

Sorry for the small type. I meant to delete the small tag but I forgot. But hey, it was only written for jscott anyhow.
posted by miss lynnster at 7:31 PM on May 14, 2007

Sooo, what happened with the guy she married?....the one also old enough to be her daddy? Murdoch's pap didn't give details.
posted by brujita at 8:49 PM on May 14, 2007

Miss L extends the claws, and in a few artful swipes leaves the critics a heap of bloodied ribbons.
Mr Fogerty was fortunate to escape with his entrails intact.
posted by maryh at 9:26 PM on May 14, 2007

Aslo, I find that I often confuse the Buttafuoco and Bobbitt sagas. How about a reality show that shuffles the main players from those stories, a la the fish-out-of-water Mom shows? Now that would be Fox-worthy.
posted by maryh at 9:48 PM on May 14, 2007 [1 favorite]

Sorry for the claws coming out. Seriously, I've just had such an awful day that I need a little love, not heckling. But if it will make people feel better, I shall go ahead and play journalist.

Here's Amy Fisher's official website. Amy married Louis Bellera in 2003, with whom she has two children – Brett, born in 2001, and Ava Rose, born in 2005. As of 2005 she was telling her story as a columnist on the Long Island Press. She reconciled with Mary Jo & Joey on Oprah, and then met Joey again for the coin toss at the 2006 Lingerie Bowl.

Apparently, in April Joey finished a jail sentence for possessing ammunition. Then his wife of 2 years filed for divorce last week. Coincidentally, Amy announced her separation from Bellera on the same day & then within a week they announced this reality show thing.

There ya go. No Wikipedia to be found in any of those paragraphs.
posted by miss lynnster at 11:48 PM on May 14, 2007

I dated a girl who was fired from her gig with Marvel Comics for appearing in a Joey Buttafuoco music video back in the early nineties. She was actually the basis for the character "Nightcat". So I guess that makes me practically famous.
posted by autodidact at 12:19 AM on May 15, 2007

It's especially strange that Amy would agree to do something like this because in that Oprah interview, she claimed Joey was a sexual predator, or somesuch. Money talks, I guess.
posted by cass at 6:54 AM on May 15, 2007

They probably deserve each other, but I'm still grossed out.
posted by ob at 7:22 AM on May 15, 2007

Didn’t Buttafuoco fight some woman on some sort of reality show?
I vaguely recall that.
Or was that a nightmare I had as a metaphor for loss of manhood?
I mean I’d rather be sodomized with vegetables by yokels at a carnival than do something like that. But y’know, I have class.
Hell, if I was hurting for money and had no skills I’d wash dishes or something. But wasn’t he a mechanic? They can feed themselves pretty good last I heard.
Which means he’s doing this for what? Fame? That porno career didn’t take off? What’s he think he’s going to be a real actor now? He can’t be that deluded. So, what, money?
I can’t think of anything I need that badly that money could buy.
...I think his dick really has a hold on him more than anyone else.
posted by Smedleyman at 5:24 PM on May 15, 2007

Miss Lynnster: Great work!
posted by jscott at 2:09 AM on May 20, 2007

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