Anger Management
June 9, 2007 10:31 AM   Subscribe

 
asshole.
posted by YoBananaBoy at 10:38 AM on June 9, 2007


Christ, what an.
posted by Citizen Premier at 10:39 AM on June 9, 2007


I call bullshit, but if it's real, I somehow doubt this person will make it to old age.
posted by Flem Snopes at 10:43 AM on June 9, 2007


I hope that's a true story.
posted by Jess the Mess at 10:43 AM on June 9, 2007


(is it just me, or has the number of single-link items pulled directly from reddit or digg increased a lot lately?)
posted by effbot at 10:46 AM on June 9, 2007


oldie, but a goody.
posted by HyperBlue at 10:50 AM on June 9, 2007


Old Internet Forward Filter.
posted by Zinger at 10:51 AM on June 9, 2007


My mom sent this to me in 1997.
posted by Falconetti at 11:03 AM on June 9, 2007


I was just thinking the same thing, effbot. The front page of MetaFilter is starting to look remarkably similar to the front page of Digg and Reddit.

I mean, people used to at least throw in a wikipedia link or two, to at least attempt to make it a good MeFi post, but now they don't even bother with that!
posted by ChasFile at 11:03 AM on June 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


True or not, One could compile a book of such stuff. A favorite is the story of the Brit who bumped a guys brand new car on street parking. He got out and left a note: " I bumed your car. People are watching this and think I am giving you my name and address. I am not. Lots of luck."
posted by Postroad at 11:04 AM on June 9, 2007


I mean, people used to at least throw in a wikipedia link or two, to at least attempt to make it a good MeFi post, but now they don't even bother with that!

Just a theory, I think we're seeing an upsurge in one-link posts due to the get gun-shyness resulting from this kind of thing. Now, obviously there's a big difference between this and the current FPP; there's plenty of room in the middle, but just a thought. Other than that, isn't furnishing Wikipedia links (I mean, other than real finds) on the Blue to fluff up a post a bit passé at this point?

I don't have a problem with a brief one link post to a good, interesting or funny story. But this one doesn't do it for me.
posted by psmealey at 11:13 AM on June 9, 2007


I prefer this method. Better yet, this.
posted by phaedon at 11:15 AM on June 9, 2007


"at least throw in a wikipedia link or two"

Or some questionable words, perhaps? Say, Jackass, C**t, Arsehole, Twat, Butthead, or perhaps just Jerk? And then add something about cultural preferences?
posted by effbot at 11:23 AM on June 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


True or not, One could compile a book of such stuff. A favorite is the story of the Brit who bumped a guys brand new car on street parking. He got out and left a note: " I bumed your car. People are watching this and think I am giving you my name and address. I am not. Lots of luck."

Above and beyond it being an urban legend, that story was also an Andy Capp comic.
posted by The Card Cheat at 11:27 AM on June 9, 2007


Assuming the story is true (which I doubt)...all that over being sworn at on the phone and being cut off for a parking spot? What a fucking sociopath.
posted by The Card Cheat at 11:30 AM on June 9, 2007


Man, you're a tough crowd today. And every other day. ;)
posted by dabitch at 11:40 AM on June 9, 2007


I don't know, Card Cheat. I can see myself doing that and I'm definitely not a sociopath, just a vindictive person.
posted by Jess the Mess at 11:45 AM on June 9, 2007


man that is definitely one of my favorite 9-year-old email forwards. can you post the one about the nuns again?
posted by facetious at 11:46 AM on June 9, 2007


Would you mind cataloguing all the email forwards you'd received over the past 10 or so years and sending me the index, facetious? That's the only way I can really be sure that this sort of thing never happens again. Thanks in advance.
posted by Tommy Gnosis at 11:55 AM on June 9, 2007


While this is a good phone prank I'm sure most mefites have done something almost as bad.

When 3-way calling just came out, I used to call one random person from the phone book and then tell him to hold, call the another person and then say something like 'go to hell.' Then, sometimes, the two people would go at it because they thought the other person insulted them.

I would also call pizza places start to make an order, have my brother make some noise in the background then pop a paper bag and say "Oh my god I've been shot. Call the police!" They never did.

Our phone was also a digit away from a radiator repair place. People would call asking about their cars and i would tell them its going to take a week longer and cost a lot more. Although, this didnt happen often but when it did I put on my best mechanic's assistant voice.

Lastly, somehow some guy named otis gave out our phone number as his own. I would pretend to be his stoner roommate saying he was never there and how he owes me money. Or how he's still at the clinic or the plasma donation place. One time I arranged it so next time they called for Otis my brother would scream like a woman and I threw an old broken lamp of ours and yelled, "SHUT BITCH SHUT UP" and hung up. None of this could have been good for his reputation. On the plus side, after the wife beating prank, they stopped calling.

/i was a stupid kid
posted by damn dirty ape at 11:57 AM on June 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


That's the only way I can really be sure that this sort of thing never happens again.

Nah, Snopes has them all. And Google is your friend.
posted by effbot at 12:08 PM on June 9, 2007


Some people are immune to Snopes. I have recommended it to several panicked perpetrators of emails to their total address book warning of a virus or other natural or unnatural disaster. The result: two have sent warnings including "we checked Snopes and this i real". Sure enough,Snopes listed both with the note in red "Hoax".
These people are college graduates and, alas, voters.
posted by Cranberry at 12:30 PM on June 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


Your mom forwarded this to me. Twice.
posted by loquacious at 12:33 PM on June 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


That's only because you never took her out to dinner, you ingrate.
posted by Tommy Gnosis at 12:35 PM on June 9, 2007




dda : I'm sure most mefites have done something almost as bad.

*looks around nervously*

Ok, I did have a prank. Years ago, I worked for a place that had no real management, was open 24 hours a day, and had business phones with multiple lines. We used to break out the phone book, randomly call two different numbers, connect them, and listen on mute. The first number would pick up their phone and hear it ringing, often they would be curious as to what the hell was going on so they would stay on the line till the other person answered;

Person A: hello?

Person B: Hi... Did you just call me?

Person A: No, You called me, my phone was ringing.

Person B: Uh, actually my phone was the one that was ringing. I answered it, and you are on it, so you called me.

This could go on at length. Usually people would attribute it to a glitch and just hang up. Occasionally they would pick fights, and bizarrely, sometimes they just chatted. (We always found this really weird. Complete strangers and all that...)

Did I mention that we were doing this at 1am? Yeah, that was a good part, we were messing with people who were half awake.

This got old after a while, so we started calling people with the same last name who lived in the same town but at different addresses.

Person A: Hello?

Person B: Mom? Why are you calling so late?

Person A: Johnny? I'm not calling you, you called me...

And so forth.

I probably should feel bad about this, shouldn't I?
posted by quin at 12:55 PM on June 9, 2007 [4 favorites]


True or not, @$$holery or not, vindictive or not, Digg/ Fark/ old/ whatever or not...

Tommy, sparing you details, I really, really needed this for sheer catharsis. Take two TYVMs from petty cash. I haven't laughed this hard in months...
posted by pax digita at 1:13 PM on June 9, 2007


Battle asses.
posted by maxwelton at 1:17 PM on June 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


Damn you maxwelton, that was disgusting. And I can't stop laughing.
posted by quin at 1:26 PM on June 9, 2007


not true ... 911 knows where you're calling from ... up to that point it was believable
posted by pyramid termite at 1:50 PM on June 9, 2007


I laughed.
posted by Iron Rat at 2:20 PM on June 9, 2007


"i say, old bean, have you seen my hat?"
posted by Uther Bentrazor at 3:00 PM on June 9, 2007


I WISH my mom would forward me stuff that's as good as this.
posted by chuckdarwin at 4:42 PM on June 9, 2007


Yeah, this is great. Once we identify an asshole we can do anything we want to him because we know he deserves it. Hahaha. The fun we'll have!

Sort of like Iraq.
posted by gesamtkunstwerk at 5:05 PM on June 9, 2007 [1 favorite]


I want it to be real.
I (usually) don't want to be a sociopath myself, but I love to see that others are doing it on my behalf.
posted by Methylviolet at 6:19 PM on June 9, 2007


Yeah, this is great. Once we identify an asshole we can do anything we want to him because we know he deserves it. Hahaha. The fun we'll have!

Sort of like Iraq.
posted by gesamtkunstwerk at 7:05 PM on June 9 [+] [!]


I think I just identified an asshole.
posted by IronLizard at 6:28 PM on June 9, 2007 [2 favorites]


I was sports editor at my college newspaper, and now and then we would get phone calls on the direct line to the sports desk that were intended for a local electronics store, so I guess the numbers were very similar.

One evening I get a call, answer "Titan Sports," and the guy on the line asks, "ABC Electronics?"

"No, you got the wrong number, happens all the time," and hang up.

The phone rings again immediately, so I answer, "ABC Electronics, how my I help you?" in my cheeriest voice.

"You got a 273E-25?" (or some such part number) he asks.

"Sure, but we've only got one left. It's $49.50."

"$49.50?"

"Sorry, I mean $4.95. Must be a typo. Too many typos around here. You better hurry, we're closing in half an hour."

"I'll be right there!"

No fisticuffs or police helicopters, but at least mine is a true story.
posted by planetkyoto at 8:25 AM on June 10, 2007


I thought it was pretty funny but I'm not one of the people he called.
posted by fenriq at 8:37 AM on June 10, 2007


A telephone is kind of weird. Something you put in your house which can make a loud, annoying noise, but only people safely outside of your house (and just about ANYBODY, too, what with the book which is delivered free to their doorstep) can make it ring. It's a noisemaker which is completely under outside control. A cell phone even follows you around..
posted by tehloki at 1:45 PM on June 10, 2007 [2 favorites]


It's a noisemaker which is completely under outside control.

Which is exactly why I got rid of mine. No one who called it was anyone I wanted to talk to.

A cell phone even follows you around..

The only person who can make my phone ring is my wife. Everyone else goes to voicemail. If it's important, I'll call them back on my schedule. I love my cell phone, but I love it conditionally.
posted by quin at 2:27 PM on June 10, 2007 [2 favorites]


An angle on anger: Ram Dass interviews Thich Nhat Hanh. http://youtube.com/watch?v=tZKrl5n79hY
posted by priyatam at 9:56 AM on June 11, 2007


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