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July 10, 2007 9:49 PM   Subscribe

The Will It Blend? guy reaches geek-apogee. [via]
posted by Heywood Mogroot (100 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
 
This is my 1,000th comment.
posted by nola at 9:53 PM on July 10, 2007


Oh wow.

I think that black dust is from the hard drive platter shattering. Or maybe the battery?
posted by nasreddin at 9:53 PM on July 10, 2007


It really can do anything! But don't breath it in!
posted by inconsequentialist at 9:54 PM on July 10, 2007


He should blend it with a Zune, then set the mixture on fire. No reason, really, it just seems like a nice thing to do.
posted by Burhanistan at 9:54 PM on July 10, 2007


It doesn't have a harddrive, so it's probably the black plastic external case and the battery casing.
posted by Burhanistan at 9:55 PM on July 10, 2007


Can he blend my broken heart?
posted by ColdChef at 9:55 PM on July 10, 2007 [2 favorites]


I thought this was going to be the transformers, but no! You've bested me! This is better: schadenfreude and embarassment of riches rolled...no, blended... into one satisfying black hash.

Wow, it's so gratifying to see him follow through with the weirdness that was so apparent in him from that first can of coke.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 9:55 PM on July 10, 2007


That was somehow violent
posted by KokuRyu at 9:56 PM on July 10, 2007


Dupe. Sorry.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 9:56 PM on July 10, 2007


Oh, sorry. Didn't realize this was a new, iPhone specific blending.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 9:58 PM on July 10, 2007


Not exactly a duplicate, and with this you get to see another iphone destroyed. No flag.
posted by Burhanistan at 9:58 PM on July 10, 2007


But EB, he blended a iphone.
posted by nola at 9:59 PM on July 10, 2007


'damn preview button isn't working'
posted by nola at 10:00 PM on July 10, 2007


OK, I laughed.
posted by Clave at 10:00 PM on July 10, 2007


Though, I have to respect the durability of the iPhone. The video screen remained lit for several seconds of Blendtec fury.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:01 PM on July 10, 2007 [4 favorites]


Listen, that isn't just black dust, that the essence of a dark matter borne from the thrashing coils of a fear engine tearing asunder an unholy false idol upheaved from the gaping maw of a turtlenecked beast after consuming the tortured souls doomed to a depraved religion based on fruit.
posted by Stan Chin at 10:12 PM on July 10, 2007 [24 favorites]


Okay. Awkward.
posted by ZaphodB at 10:18 PM on July 10, 2007 [7 favorites]


Well, that takes care of my nightmares for tonight.
posted by Kattullus at 10:20 PM on July 10, 2007 [1 favorite]


I don't really think we need a new post for different things they blend. It's been here before, so dupe.
posted by puke & cry at 10:21 PM on July 10, 2007


Best iPhone post, hands down.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:23 PM on July 10, 2007 [1 favorite]


Well that was satisfying.
posted by delmoi at 10:33 PM on July 10, 2007


Works for me.
posted by LinusMines at 10:43 PM on July 10, 2007


I don't know. The wanton destruction of an item that showcases conspicuous consumerism at it's finest? Our society can waste such things for the benefit of finding out if it blends? I worry about the world sometimes.

Blenders are supposed to make things like fruit smoothies. The blending ultimately makes energy more available to people who need it the most.

But the iPod? It's like, "oh, I have so much money I can pander to the desires of the masses. I have two. Screw you third world that might benefit from the nurturing nutrients that might be gotten if my blending technology were to be applied to stave off world hunger."

Unless people take the blending to be a thumbing of the nose at the products of a capitalist society, I don't know how I can feel comfortable viewing this youtube link again.
posted by Mister Cheese at 10:44 PM on July 10, 2007 [2 favorites]


I was cheering until he pulled the second iPhone out of his pocket.
posted by thecaddy at 10:46 PM on July 10, 2007


Oh really. I mean, really. Yet another "I can blend an expensive hand held device" videos.

Blend your fucking head. That'd be worth watching.
posted by mattoxic at 10:54 PM on July 10, 2007 [2 favorites]


That's satire, Mister Cheese, right?

Right?
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 10:59 PM on July 10, 2007


Now we know what happened to mathowie's first iPhone.
posted by Cranberry at 11:04 PM on July 10, 2007


I still want some cochicken.
posted by The Great Big Mulp at 11:13 PM on July 10, 2007


This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but a blender.
posted by maryh at 11:26 PM on July 10, 2007 [7 favorites]


I never understand the dupe thing if it isn't on the first page or so. Does anyone spend their evenings going back over MeFi posts?
posted by A189Nut at 11:53 PM on July 10, 2007


Wait. I think I hear it ringing.
posted by pracowity at 12:02 AM on July 11, 2007


I never understand the dupe thing if it isn't on the first page or so. Does anyone spend their evenings going back over MeFi posts?

No, some people just have good memories.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 12:17 AM on July 11, 2007


I lliked Ars Technica crew's slow torture test of the iPhone with a death scenario that's more likely for most of us than a blender (video on bottom of page).
posted by jaimev at 12:20 AM on July 11, 2007


Though I am more enamored with the concept of the iPhone than the prospect of actually possessing one for myself, that was physically painful to watch.

I'm sure that in two years something similar (though not nearly as graphic) will happen to virtually every iPhone in existence today, as service contracts will be up and the next new thing will be three generations ahead. But the gratuitous immediacy of this wanton cycle of consumption and abandonment/destruction shines a bright light on the vulgarity lurking in the shadows of commoditized desire.

Or perhaps it's no more obscene than making a milkshake and I'm just a wanker.
posted by kyleg at 12:25 AM on July 11, 2007


"I never understand the dupe thing..."

Me either dude. I like dupes, cuz I often miss the stuff that others accuse as being duped. Whatever. Just try not to let the people searching for dupeness get your panties in a wad.

I often catch myself duping my own replies, but nobody seems to notice. Or maybe these feelings of de ja vu are just me going senile.
posted by ZachsMind at 12:29 AM on July 11, 2007


When the iPhone came out there were a surprising number of people destroying them, mostly by dissasembly but also by dropping them. In fact, I read more links about destroying the damn thing than I saw about how well it worked.

It's like we're into a new phase of loving technology. Now we're treating it bad. People love the iPhone to such a high degree that they secretly hate it too because it can never live up to their expectations. It's like people in an abusive relationship: "I only beat her because I love her so much, officer!".
posted by humblepigeon at 12:34 AM on July 11, 2007


"I never understand the dupe thing..."

Me either dude.


Me neither. I think it's because some people like to destroy. It gives them the same kind of kick that people get from creating, except that it's much, much easier. Some people destroy simply because they can't create.

Wikipedia is particularly bad for this. Getting a new article up online is fucking hard work nowadays, because an army of people will attempt to get it taken down for various spurious reasons. Even editing a document is getting difficult.
posted by humblepigeon at 12:36 AM on July 11, 2007


MetaFilter: Noooooo!
posted by phaedon at 12:38 AM on July 11, 2007


I never understand the dupe thing if it isn't on the first page or so. Does anyone spend their evenings going back over MeFi posts?

It's pretty simple. Will It Blend? has been here before. The objection to my position seems to be that this is a new video that features *gasp* THE IPHONE.

So either it's yet another iphone post, of which we have enough, or it's another video from blendtec, which has been here before.

If the former, you can go to digg for every monotonous iphone post, I hear they're good at that. If the latter, we don't need to post every new video that blendtec makes.
posted by puke & cry at 12:51 AM on July 11, 2007


When I was six years old they had these television commercials for Timex watches. They would duck tape the watch to the tip of Jean Claude Killy's skis or something then afterwards a closeup of the second hand still moving and they said. "Takes a licking and keeps on ticking".
posted by bukvich at 12:53 AM on July 11, 2007


You don't say? The world sure was was wacky way back when.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 12:58 AM on July 11, 2007 [1 favorite]


Or perhaps it's no more obscene than making a milkshake and I'm just a wanker.

it's about 300x more obscene than making a milkshake, I would suppose. Those dairy products you'd be consuming for no good reason could have been dried and sent to Africa, of course.

p & c: I felt the dead-on execution of this piece, plus scientific value of seeing what an iPhone -- an object of primo techno-lust -- reduces to, made this "best of the web", at least if you're an Apple Fanboy. And aren't we all, deep down inside ? ? ?
posted by Heywood Mogroot at 1:03 AM on July 11, 2007


i see no point in this other than waste. which is what he is too.
posted by monkeyJuice at 1:41 AM on July 11, 2007


If he blended five crisp C-notes (plus tax, assuming 4gb), it would be a federal offense. By converting it to iChattel, alls he duz is voids da warranty. As the great poet once said, "To live outside the law you must be honest."
posted by alamo1234 at 2:38 AM on July 11, 2007


My favorite part was where he put the iPhone in a blender.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 2:49 AM on July 11, 2007 [3 favorites]


Blending an iPhone isn't geek apogee. To reach that level he'd have to throw in a Wii, an XBox 360 and Wil Wheaton.
posted by Faint of Butt at 3:32 AM on July 11, 2007 [2 favorites]


You could take all of Apple's profit from 2006 and send it to Africa to help ease the situations in the various war-torn regions, but it wouldn't fix it (it would end up in the hands of the warlords).

You can't stop genocide with money. You can't fix the problems in the poorest regions of the world until you can stabilise the security, get everyone healthy and educate everyone (especially all the women and children). Money, on its own, won't do any of those things. It will take massive will and human effort, and no one wants to give those things, least of all Americans.

You can go back to talking about telephones now.

/derail
posted by chuckdarwin at 3:35 AM on July 11, 2007


Sorry, I was sort of addressing Mister Cheese.
posted by chuckdarwin at 3:36 AM on July 11, 2007


This made all of the other iPhone posts worth it.
posted by grouse at 4:01 AM on July 11, 2007


Kill your gods.

I'm waiting for him to do the final edition, "Will I Blend?"
posted by Eideteker at 4:19 AM on July 11, 2007 [7 favorites]


(That was the FIFTIETH comment in this thread.)
posted by Eideteker at 4:20 AM on July 11, 2007


I wonder if the BlendTec guy tries to get MSDSs on the products he blends or if he is going to die from chronic beryllium disease, tumors, cancer, or silicosis.
posted by BrotherCaine at 4:21 AM on July 11, 2007


I want to know how much an auction of the shrapnel would net.
posted by ardgedee at 4:28 AM on July 11, 2007


That was the internet meme equivalent of Godzilla vs. Mothra.
posted by unSane at 4:47 AM on July 11, 2007


I liked it. It made my housemates giggle. That's all I need, some days.

Also, every Will It Blend? brings me a baby step closer to buying that blender.
posted by Jilder at 4:58 AM on July 11, 2007


That old guy is very well coiffed, and the studio very well lit.
That iPhone sure looks nice.
That blender does not look that powerful.
The iPhone dances like a marionette!
The iPhone dances like a marionette!
Then darkness.
(The dust and debris are probably very very toxic.)
The end.
An interesting presentation with just enough extra room so that everyone can bring their own baggage along for the ride.
Sublime.
posted by From Bklyn at 4:59 AM on July 11, 2007 [2 favorites]


I'm sure this post will blend.
posted by Termite at 5:31 AM on July 11, 2007


iPhone in a blender, I know
I know - its serious
iPhone in a blender, I know
I know - its really serious

There were times when I could
Have murdered it
(but you know, I would hate
Anything to happen to it)

No, I dont want to see it

Do you really think
It'll pull through ?
Do you really think
It'll pull through ?
Do ...
posted by psmealey at 6:03 AM on July 11, 2007 [3 favorites]


This upset Fake Steve Jobs very much.
posted by papercake at 6:18 AM on July 11, 2007


And am I the first person to notice that iPhone rearranged spells out "hip one"?

No. Oh well.
posted by papercake at 6:21 AM on July 11, 2007


Is it safe to destroy a gigantic lithium ion battery like that? How do you dispose of it?
posted by empath at 6:32 AM on July 11, 2007


It also spells "I no hep."
posted by Dr-Baa at 6:33 AM on July 11, 2007


If he blended five crisp C-notes...
...he'd be Terry Riley.
posted by Wolfdog at 6:50 AM on July 11, 2007


I was drinking dead-Apple margaritas when some of y'all were still in grad(e) school.
posted by spitbull at 6:56 AM on July 11, 2007


Well, I do need a new blender...
posted by Skorgu at 7:33 AM on July 11, 2007


If he blended five crisp C-notes
It appears that you can blend coins but not bills? What's up with that?

Other technical questions:
From 0:00 to 0:36 it appears to just be the phone.
Returning from the instant replay, from 0:56 to 1:00 it appears to be liquid- is that an optical illusion?
At 1:01 there is a cut and now the whole thing turns black, presumably dust.
Then when he dumps everything out, what's that big metal thingy?

I think I'm with Mister Cheese on this one. I am not a fan of Apple or 'new technology' and normally like to see stuff in a blender, so I am surprised that I find this ...wrong.
posted by MtDewd at 7:39 AM on July 11, 2007


"And am I the first person to notice that iPhone rearranged spells out 'hip one'?"

It also anagrams to peel an hippo.

That's right, an hippo.
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:48 AM on July 11, 2007


I'd be in the "Not AGAIN" crowd, too, if it weren't for the fact that the iPhone has been shoved in my face several times a day since it was first announced. Seeing it blend was kind of nice. Expensive waste aside.
posted by katillathehun at 7:48 AM on July 11, 2007


(that would be "Apple iPhone", btw)
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:48 AM on July 11, 2007


After the first time BlendTec was linked to here and I saw those videos, I seriously wanted one of those blenders, even though they're super expensive (several hundred dollars or something like that). But, hell, those fuckers can do anything you would ever actually want to do with a blender and do it quickly and make stuff as super smooth as you want. It makes me want a whole kitchen full of "super appliances". Like a gigawatt microwave oven. A can opener that laser cuts off the top of a can in a half-second. A dishwasher that blasts really dirty dishes clean and dry in 30 seconds. Stuff like that.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 7:51 AM on July 11, 2007 [2 favorites]


Okay, I'd settle for a megawatt microwave oven if I had to. Hey, who here wants to superheat some water and then toss a pinch of flour into it? I haven't done that in years.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 7:52 AM on July 11, 2007


Is it safe to destroy a gigantic lithium ion battery like that? How do you dispose of it?
posted by empath at 6:32 AM on July 11

No!

Outside of the explosion risk I think "blending" a Lithium-Ion Polymer battery would be quite poisonous. Those eye protectors wouldn't do much for that. Notice how in the beginning of the video it gets kind of "greasy." I actually think they may have done some editing trickery because of this. I don't think it would be remotely safe to "pour" out a pulverised battery.
posted by geos at 7:55 AM on July 11, 2007


Now all we need is a video of Keith Richards snorting the blended up iPhone.
posted by solipsophistocracy at 8:16 AM on July 11, 2007


this is the greatest thing I have ever seen, ever. fucking. ever.
posted by shmegegge at 8:41 AM on July 11, 2007


i see no point in this other than waste.

That's pretty much what I think of non-blended iPhones as well.
posted by Foosnark at 8:52 AM on July 11, 2007 [1 favorite]


I'm sure I'm late to the party, but I think there might be an audience for a spinoff site -- Will it Bend?.
posted by notyou at 9:05 AM on July 11, 2007


This is my 1,000th comment.
posted by nola at 1:53 AM on July 11 [+] [!]


This is my 1,987th comment.
posted by signal at 9:16 AM on July 11, 2007


i love that man, and i want to have his babies.
posted by es_de_bah at 9:51 AM on July 11, 2007


also, that picture sure lasted a long time. them iphones is tough!
posted by es_de_bah at 9:52 AM on July 11, 2007


This is my 1,987th comment.

This is my 7,078th comment.
posted by Ethereal Bligh at 9:58 AM on July 11, 2007


iPhone in a blender, I know
I know - its serious .....


Dammit, I'm going to be singing this all day.
posted by jefbla at 10:04 AM on July 11, 2007


And, you can buy the blenderized iphone and the blender itself on ebay! The bid's almost $300 if anyone's interested.
posted by rcavett at 10:13 AM on July 11, 2007


“This is my 1,987th comment.”

This is my 7,078th comment.


This is my fourth comment. There was an accident with mozilla and a Malley wormhole.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 10:39 AM on July 11, 2007


That was lslutsky's first comment.

How ever did I guess?
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 11:16 AM on July 11, 2007


I wouldn't consider this "geek apogee" until the guy blends another blender while that blender is blending a blender! This thread is useless without recursion.
posted by majick at 11:30 AM on July 11, 2007 [1 favorite]


Leonard
allaboutleo.tumblr.com
posted by lslutsky at 1:30 PM on July 11 [+] [!]


TODD LOKKEN!!!
posted by shmegegge at 11:53 AM on July 11, 2007 [1 favorite]


What would be a geek-perigee? Sticking it in his arse?
posted by psmealey at 12:18 PM on July 11, 2007 [1 favorite]


Fuck the iPhone. I want that blender.
posted by LeeJay at 12:33 PM on July 11, 2007


What would be a geek-perigee? Sticking it in his arse?

No, that would be a greek perigee.
posted by LeeJay at 12:49 PM on July 11, 2007 [1 favorite]


It apparently did end up on eBay.
posted by Upton O'Good at 12:50 PM on July 11, 2007


Apple iphone blends
Dents become black dust of death
R.I.P. iphone.
posted by misha at 1:10 PM on July 11, 2007 [1 favorite]


Upton - hilarious, if you follow the seller's history you will see the purchase of an iphone on ebay.
posted by exogenous at 1:23 PM on July 11, 2007


I wish the Will-It-Blend guy would invest in a nice high-speed camera system.
posted by hellphish at 1:26 PM on July 11, 2007


Man, Jesus is gonna be pissed when he finds out what happened to His Phone.

...or did he just blend Jesus?
posted by Extopalopaketle at 2:51 PM on July 11, 2007


"I wouldn't consider this "geek apogee" until the guy blends another blender while that blender is blending a blender! This thread is useless without recursion."

Ok, I'm a very cheap (READ: poor) bastard, but I would pay to see this.

Also, I would pay to see the video of it happening on an apple iPhone/Pod that was itself being blended.

MetaFilter: This thread is useless without "MetaFilter: This thread is useless without recursion.".
posted by Eideteker at 3:32 PM on July 11, 2007


In the last MeFi thread on this blender guy there were several comments on one of the intro montages where he appears to be blending a crowbar. We now see via YouTube that he only pretends he's going to blend a crowbar, but aborts mission and blends some cell phones instead.

Verdict: The Blendtek 9000 does not have the hairy man balls to blend a crowbar. This is simply not the kind of mincing, nancy appliance I want in my household getting its estrogen all over my dangerously masculine piña coladas and fruit smoothies.
posted by dgaicun at 6:10 PM on July 11, 2007


That crowbar video was a tease, but the line at the end was great.
posted by grouse at 6:13 PM on July 11, 2007


And this was just the frappe' setting...
posted by Tube at 7:50 PM on July 11, 2007


the eBay bid is over $500 and there is still 8 days left! okay, you get a blender too, but still.

so if I blend my Blackberry and throw in my wife, how much do you think I'd get?
posted by spish at 8:09 AM on July 12, 2007


so if I blend my Blackberry and throw in my wife, how much do you think I'd get?

15 to life
posted by nasreddin at 1:57 PM on July 12, 2007


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