Micro Maniac
July 30, 2007 9:28 PM   Subscribe

What happens when you put marshmallows, footballs, eggs, gum, Christmas lights, or ketchup packets in the microwave? The results of 21 products cooked to a soggy mess. (Flash, music, Kraft Blue)
posted by daninnj (29 comments total) 3 users marked this as a favorite
And as always, kids, do not try this at home.
posted by daninnj at 9:30 PM on July 30, 2007

No aluminum foil?

It looks like Data from Star Trek is standing behind the microwave.
posted by stavrogin at 9:37 PM on July 30, 2007

That's a real shame about the flash. If they had real video files of this stuff that would be so much better. As it is, it's just plain annoying to watch.
posted by Sukiari at 9:38 PM on July 30, 2007

I'm not clicking on this link. I'm waiting for the post about putting a microwave oven into a blender that's riding in a speeding car smashing into a low-flying helicopter.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 9:38 PM on July 30, 2007

*Realizes it's a viral ad for Easy Mac/Kraft Foods. Sits back with some microwaved popcorn.*
posted by miss lynnster at 9:39 PM on July 30, 2007

Well, marshmallows become awesome. Many a time I've made thirty-second rice crispy treats that way.
posted by Many bubbles at 9:41 PM on July 30, 2007

Wait, not all at once? Fuck that noise.

As far as stunt marketing goes, I do like this sort of thing—the wacky blending, the microwave abuse—for the fly-on-the-wall playfulness of it. Reminds me of some of the Fire Protection Engineering grad classes I taped as a workstudy video grunt in college, but without the specter of death about it that those always had. And it's markedly less disingenuous, I think, than the wink-and-nod warnings you see on party-with-hot-chicks beer commercials and cigarette ads: this is much more "watch this irresponsible shit that we're willing to tape under controlled circumstances" compared to the latter sort's "look at how great your life could be if you were cool like this OH BUT DON'T BE IRRESPONSIBLE PLZ" bullshit.

So it makes me a bit sad when I think about the eventual lawsuit that'll drive these companies to get gunshy about this sort of thing and go back to smiling suburban housewives just loving the hell out of their brand new microwave, gosh-a-golly. The US, at least, could do with more crazy Japanese TV aesthetic and less conservative paint-by-numbers numbjobs in its marketing. Have some goddam fun, guys. Microwave a football or something.
posted by cortex at 9:47 PM on July 30, 2007

Is it just me, or does the glue almost need a NSFW tag there? Or maybe I'm just perverted...
posted by FritoKAL at 9:55 PM on July 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

This is what the internet is for.
posted by ColdChef at 10:07 PM on July 30, 2007

Once you get tired of the simple stuff, go to the real microwave oven experiment site here, created by Metafilter's own billb.

The king of the microwave oven games is to create plasma, or "ball lightning". The easiest way to do this is with carbon fiber veil. (self link)
posted by Tube at 10:10 PM on July 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

i had an ninth grade party that was under only light supervision where we had egg races in the microwave -- the first to explode was the loser. it never took terribly long for the eggs to blow, except once, when the winning egg went minute after minute and seemed almost to compress, as about 10 ninth-graders looked on in anticipation; when it finally blew, nearly four minutes after the race had started, it broke the locking mechanism on the microwave door and it flew open, scaring the shit out of us.

to unwind after such a jolt, we made human rootbeer floats (wherein you eat a bowl of vanilla ice cream and then chug a can of rootbeer and jump up and down).
posted by Hat Maui at 10:10 PM on July 30, 2007 [2 favorites]

When I was a kid, I liked putting those little red hots candy in the microwave. They would quickly turn into a brown, tar-like substance...and god, the smell...that smell permeated the microwave, would stick around for days. What the hell was I thinking?
posted by MaryDellamorte at 10:28 PM on July 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

Saw this a couple days ago, my favorite was the christmas lights. SO PRETTY.

My little brother put an egg in the microwave when I was in high school. As someone else mentioned, it blew up, and blew the door of the oven open (breaking the latch). Mom was NOT happy.
posted by mrbill at 11:05 PM on July 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

The cake died with such hilarious and depressing splendour. You can almost hear it screaming "I'm meeeeltttiiiiing!"
posted by tehloki at 12:32 AM on July 31, 2007

The king of the microwave oven games is to create plasma, or "ball lightning".

Ball lightning is fun. Using your microwave to smelt is funner. (Article inspired by this fellow.)

Now that's a fun goddamned word. Smelt. Smelt. Smelt.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 2:05 AM on July 31, 2007

This is also an ad, but it lets you flush things.
posted by Wolfdog at 2:48 AM on July 31, 2007

Flagged as a lame viral.

We need a "whiny old wet blanket" flag. I thought it was at least a well-done viral.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 4:22 AM on July 31, 2007

Honestly, I'm pretty amazed at the comments. For a while there, whether or not an ad was well done was superfluous to people's indignity that a viral ad was posted.

Maybe what we really need is someone in a dirty chicken suit microwaving things.

posted by miss lynnster at 4:37 AM on July 31, 2007

As it is, it's just plain annoying to watch Amen to that. I wanted it to stop, or just cut to the chase. Possibly THE single most annoying site on the web.

I'm going back to zombo.com
posted by mattoxic at 5:06 AM on July 31, 2007

In college, a friend of mine put eggs in the microwave at a party. A few minutes later, the eggs blew the door off the (cheap, old) microwave. Chaos followed and its a miracle nobody was killed.
posted by blaneyphoto at 5:34 AM on July 31, 2007

No iPhone???

I missed the ad part...am I supposed to buy something?
I liked the christmas lights also- the idea that they light up.
posted by MtDewd at 6:22 AM on July 31, 2007

The pineapple was really disappointing- maybe I've seen too many WWII movies.

I was told once that if you put a ping-pong ball in the microwave, it would disappear, but I've never had the courage/stupidity to try anything like this on my own appliance.
posted by MtDewd at 6:27 AM on July 31, 2007

When I was a kid, we didn't have microwave ovens. We had to settle for gunpowder and gasoline when we needed to blow stuff up real good. But I think the powdered cheese on the Kraft DinnerĀ® was radioactive.
posted by pracowity at 6:28 AM on July 31, 2007

We used to cycle marshmallows between the microwave and the freezer, repeatedly, until it became a hard, flat brittle sugar wafer. Then we'd chip it off of the plate and eat it. No idea why this was fascinating to us, but it was. Took forever to actually clean the plate afterwards though.

My little brother tried to cook a whole egg in the microwave. It didn't break, but when he picked it up he immediately dropped it, because it was hot - at which point it exploded and burned the crap out of his face. Big angry red welts on his chin (fortunately that was the worst of it).

Do not microwave whole eggs, people. Break them open first. Whole eggs in microwave = bomb.
posted by caution live frogs at 7:41 AM on July 31, 2007 [1 favorite]

Maybe what we really need is someone in a dirty chicken suit microwaving things.

By "dirty chicken suit," you mean a naked man with his erect willy in a store-bought chicken's bum, don't you? Curse you Jessamyn for that image.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:02 AM on July 31, 2007

Whole eggs in microwave = bomb.

Our own personal Adam Savage has a thing or two to say about nuking jawbreakers, too.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 8:03 AM on July 31, 2007

I missed the ad part...am I supposed to buy something?

Before the site is loaded, it says "No Mac to Mic?" and if you look on the top right, it says "Need food now?" on a tiny ad for Easy Mac microwaveable mac & cheese. If you delete the directory name on the page and go to the main site, it's a fake university called "U of St. Arvin" (Get it? U Starvin?) and if you look on the bottom of the page it says this:

Ā© 2006 Kraft Foods, Inc. All rights reserved. Kraft is a registered trademark of Kraft Foods Holdings, Inc.

A long time ago I put up a post for Meet the Lucky Ones which I still think was a unique and creative little web experiment that I was shocked Mercury did. Once I started exploring the storylines and site fully from the beginning, I actually really enjoyed the weekly character storylines & environment clues. Kind of like a quirky interactive detective story with a Tim Burton/Coen Brothers oddness. I thought it was pretty edgy and unusual for a corporate company and that the advertising angle was tertiary to the creativity that went into creating the whole interacive storytelling piece.

But wow, did I get ripped apart for posting that. And I still think it was more interesting and thought provoking than microwaved glue.
posted by miss lynnster at 11:01 AM on July 31, 2007


There IS a button to cut to the chase. It's that little tab on the plate that says "meltdown".
posted by tehloki at 1:28 PM on July 31, 2007

It'd be awesome if we could get that tab on MeTa.
posted by Wolfdog at 1:45 PM on July 31, 2007 [1 favorite]

« Older Plotbot: Online collaborative screenplay writing   |   Cutting Images Into Flesh Newer »

This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments