Mswati III checks 40000 bare breasted girls
September 2, 2007 4:34 PM Subscribe
DearLeaderFilter: We had Turkmenbashi and his enlightened laws , we heard Karl Rove cry of appreciation when watching the fantastic propaganda of the most precious
dear leader Kim Jong Il and elder people will remember a 2 meters tall black dictator Idi Amin Dada as one of the weirdest and most paranoid. But did you know about Mswati III of Swaziland, the second of 210 sons of the elderly King Sobhuza II ? Every year he gets to check out 40000 bare breasted, machete wielding maidens and eventually pick a new wife.
Hopefully he knows to reject the first 37 perrcent.
posted by transona5 at 4:38 PM on September 2, 2007
posted by transona5 at 4:38 PM on September 2, 2007
he gets to check out 40000 bare breasted, machete wielding maidens
Yet one more of the benefits of being the titular head of your country.
posted by ericb at 4:46 PM on September 2, 2007
Yet one more of the benefits of being the titular head of your country.
posted by ericb at 4:46 PM on September 2, 2007
Meh. When I took my bride, it was from 60,000 women, they were holding chainsaws, and it was full frontal.
And really, who wears a leopard-skin loincloth? Everyone knows that when choosing a wife, you wear jaguar skin.
Sheesh.
posted by quin at 4:50 PM on September 2, 2007 [2 favorites]
And really, who wears a leopard-skin loincloth? Everyone knows that when choosing a wife, you wear jaguar skin.
Sheesh.
posted by quin at 4:50 PM on September 2, 2007 [2 favorites]
That Kim Jong Il video reminded me of this great propaganda movie with Joseph Stalin and how this Russian soldier reunites with his sweetheart that was in a concentration camp, and it ends with everyone shouting in their own respective tongues "LONG LIVE JOSEPH STALIN!"
Too bad I can't find that video though.
posted by champthom at 6:28 PM on September 2, 2007
Too bad I can't find that video though.
posted by champthom at 6:28 PM on September 2, 2007
That 8th link needs a [SFW] warning tag.
posted by Deathalicious at 6:30 PM on September 2, 2007
posted by Deathalicious at 6:30 PM on September 2, 2007
Please, please, fucking please stop linking to crap videos that are all about text information and yet the text is impossible to see.
posted by ranchocalamari at 6:55 PM on September 2, 2007
posted by ranchocalamari at 6:55 PM on September 2, 2007
I actually tried to contact King Mswati a few years ago and got as far as his prime minister when he realized I was just a crank.
Another kooky aside, my bro in law was a peace corps volunteer there in Swaziland in the 80's and he loved it. He's still very much in love with the people. Too bad the king is a douche. (In honor of this post, I'm gonna try to crank him again, it's all in good fun.)
posted by snsranch at 7:47 PM on September 2, 2007
Another kooky aside, my bro in law was a peace corps volunteer there in Swaziland in the 80's and he loved it. He's still very much in love with the people. Too bad the king is a douche. (In honor of this post, I'm gonna try to crank him again, it's all in good fun.)
posted by snsranch at 7:47 PM on September 2, 2007
anybody remember the eddie murphy movie where he's playing an african prince, and he's standing in a bath with his dad and one of them says "don't your girls blow you too?"
this contest is rigged. you're looking at 40,000 pairs of tits, that's an overload, conducive to bad decisionmaking. the king can tear off a piece anytime he wants, but selecting a wife is properly arranged in advance, despite the appearance of spontaneity.
posted by bruce at 8:53 PM on September 2, 2007
this contest is rigged. you're looking at 40,000 pairs of tits, that's an overload, conducive to bad decisionmaking. the king can tear off a piece anytime he wants, but selecting a wife is properly arranged in advance, despite the appearance of spontaneity.
posted by bruce at 8:53 PM on September 2, 2007
"Elder"? You need to learn you some anglish. I learned me some so can you! I ain't 'elder', that are my daddy. Me just a bit old. :-P So I remember Idi Amin.
As for the Reed Dance, I've seen it performed, and it's beautiful. Native African dance is totally awesome, and one of the biggest treats to living in Africa. Oh, and 'Swazi' is a name given to some awesome 420 down here.
posted by Goofyy at 8:57 PM on September 2, 2007
As for the Reed Dance, I've seen it performed, and it's beautiful. Native African dance is totally awesome, and one of the biggest treats to living in Africa. Oh, and 'Swazi' is a name given to some awesome 420 down here.
posted by Goofyy at 8:57 PM on September 2, 2007
Compelling 40,000 bare-breasted virgins to dance around topless is surely the work of a great & visionary ruler, as opposed to the kinds of shenanigans we've seen too much in politics recently. If only all world leaders could come up with similar schemes for the embiggenment of human experience.
And as a token gesture towards non-sexism, the young & muscly fellas should be out there doing their thing in a similar ceremony, too.
posted by UbuRoivas at 9:11 PM on September 2, 2007 [1 favorite]
And as a token gesture towards non-sexism, the young & muscly fellas should be out there doing their thing in a similar ceremony, too.
posted by UbuRoivas at 9:11 PM on September 2, 2007 [1 favorite]
Also, this post would really go down better over a dinner of rare wild game and expensive old wine raided from Hitler's storehouse.
Punctuated by cocaine, snorted from the heads of dwarves wearing silver trays who walk among us.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 1:28 AM on September 3, 2007 [1 favorite]
Punctuated by cocaine, snorted from the heads of dwarves wearing silver trays who walk among us.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 1:28 AM on September 3, 2007 [1 favorite]
OK, I'm sending this dwarf straight over in your direction, UbuRoivas.
I've given him a tip to make sure that he avoids being diverted by Burhanistan, who I believe is in the habit of offering them extra money to perform a live sex show at previous threads like this.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 4:03 AM on September 3, 2007
I've given him a tip to make sure that he avoids being diverted by Burhanistan, who I believe is in the habit of offering them extra money to perform a live sex show at previous threads like this.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 4:03 AM on September 3, 2007
But did you know about Mswati III of Swaziland, the second of 210 sons of the elderly King Sobhuza II ?
Yes. But I guess once a year is a reasonable frequency. It's like all caps day.
posted by languagehat at 5:51 AM on September 3, 2007
Yes. But I guess once a year is a reasonable frequency. It's like all caps day.
posted by languagehat at 5:51 AM on September 3, 2007
Oy vey ! My bad ! Well if once a year is good for him, it's probably good for us too ! I wish, sorta...
posted by elpapacito at 7:52 AM on September 3, 2007
posted by elpapacito at 7:52 AM on September 3, 2007
I hear Miss Teen USA South Carolina was a runner up.
posted by analogue at 8:14 AM on September 3, 2007
posted by analogue at 8:14 AM on September 3, 2007
transona5 writes "Hopefully he knows to reject the first 37 perrcent."
transona5, that's the right line of thought, but the 37% rule gives you only a 37% chance of achieving the optimal choice. If you're willing to be satisfied with someone in the top 90%, you can do a lot better.
posted by Araucaria at 11:39 AM on September 3, 2007
transona5, that's the right line of thought, but the 37% rule gives you only a 37% chance of achieving the optimal choice. If you're willing to be satisfied with someone in the top 90%, you can do a lot better.
posted by Araucaria at 11:39 AM on September 3, 2007
MetaFilter: The work of a great & visionary ruler, compelling 40,000 machete-wielding virgins to dance around topless.
Oh, this must be in the cabal-members-only area of the site.
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:51 PM on September 3, 2007
Oh, this must be in the cabal-members-only area of the site.
posted by UbuRoivas at 3:51 PM on September 3, 2007
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posted by elpapacito at 4:34 PM on September 2, 2007