God wins in the end, in case you didn't know.
September 10, 2007 5:41 PM Subscribe
How a Gay Rights Leader became straight is a column by Michael Glatze, one-time editor of Young Gay America magazine. In the column, Glatze explains how be became gay ("I was already weak") and his eventual redemption ("Every time I was tempted to lust, I noticed it, caught it, dealt with it"). When he was still gay, Glatze seemed pretty in touch with gay youth. When interviewed for a Time cover story, he discussed gay teens' alienation saying that today's queer youth just want to be "normal kids." Apparently Glatze wanted to be a normal kid, too! Gay City News had its own take on the Glatze fiasco, quoting him as suggesting America "'examine whether homosexuality should be legal' or if gay sex should instead be punished by 'imprisonment.'" YGAmag responded to Glatze with an open letter.
More archived Young Gay America issues here.
uncanny hengeman, your comment forced me to google "Goatse" and find it through Wikipedia. I will never be the same again. I would type more but my tremors and nausea are preventing it.
posted by sneakin at 5:57 PM on September 10, 2007 [13 favorites]
posted by sneakin at 5:57 PM on September 10, 2007 [13 favorites]
Ehh... my trust of WorldNetDaily is even less than my trust of Fox after their handling of the William and Mary cross "controversy." What D-Bags.
posted by tmcw at 6:00 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by tmcw at 6:00 PM on September 10, 2007
That is a very interesting and reveling story, thanks!
posted by dov3 at 6:00 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by dov3 at 6:00 PM on September 10, 2007
tmcw, they are d-bags, for sure. But the one reason I was willing to post the story was because it was, well, written by Glatze himself. There is another WorldNetDaily article about him that I left out entirely.
posted by sneakin at 6:03 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by sneakin at 6:03 PM on September 10, 2007
Behold the last human being on Earth to view goatse!
The prophecy is fulfilled!
posted by basicchannel at 6:04 PM on September 10, 2007 [19 favorites]
The prophecy is fulfilled!
posted by basicchannel at 6:04 PM on September 10, 2007 [19 favorites]
Since when is lust-based sex "never satisfactory"? This guy's problems go a little deeper than sexual identity, methinks.
posted by padraigin at 6:09 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by padraigin at 6:09 PM on September 10, 2007
sneakin, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but the Internet is actually just a giant inside joke structured around goatse.
posted by nasreddin at 6:10 PM on September 10, 2007 [11 favorites]
posted by nasreddin at 6:10 PM on September 10, 2007 [11 favorites]
What it really comes down to, and we've all seen this, is that any time you have a sizable organization of human beings, the nuttiest nutty nutbars rise to prominence within the organization. If they hide their nuttiness reasonably well, they rise right to the very top of the organization until discovered. Then you find them in bathroom airports or lurking around the page dorms or having sex with their foster daughters...or being 'converted' from being gay.
posted by Kickstart70 at 6:13 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
posted by Kickstart70 at 6:13 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
I must admin that I agreed strongly with the open letter. Not because I particularly espouse any agenda, but because it's something I've seen very personally my whole life long...the abrogation of responsiblity due to external factors.
Mind you, as a child, I was not easy to raise by any means, but I watched my mother, father and step-father spend years looking for diagnoses explaining why I was the way I was.
I guess I wish they would have just accepted that mistakes were made (They certainly weren't bad or abusive, by any means) and that there were consequences. Instead, me being not "normal" would give us all a nice clean conscience so we can sleep better at night.
It took me a good long while to realize that I was me, and that was that. Of course, part of that is me taking the full consequences of my actions and choices, not pointing somewhere off beyond the horizon...
posted by Samizdata at 6:14 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
Mind you, as a child, I was not easy to raise by any means, but I watched my mother, father and step-father spend years looking for diagnoses explaining why I was the way I was.
I guess I wish they would have just accepted that mistakes were made (They certainly weren't bad or abusive, by any means) and that there were consequences. Instead, me being not "normal" would give us all a nice clean conscience so we can sleep better at night.
It took me a good long while to realize that I was me, and that was that. Of course, part of that is me taking the full consequences of my actions and choices, not pointing somewhere off beyond the horizon...
posted by Samizdata at 6:14 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
That's what I thought, basicchannel!
sneakin, there is an hilarious photo set on Flickr of people freaking out after seeing their first Goatse. It was an FFP here not too long ago. It is quite safe for work. No Goatses, just people freaking out about Goatse.
This picture is easily the funniest/best.
/Derial. No more Goatse talk from me.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 6:19 PM on September 10, 2007 [5 favorites]
sneakin, there is an hilarious photo set on Flickr of people freaking out after seeing their first Goatse. It was an FFP here not too long ago. It is quite safe for work. No Goatses, just people freaking out about Goatse.
This picture is easily the funniest/best.
/Derial. No more Goatse talk from me.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 6:19 PM on September 10, 2007 [5 favorites]
nasreddin, Clearly, I don't deserve to be part of any internet communities. I will delete all my accounts shortly. Before that, however, I'll need to post an AskMe about how to get terrifying images out of my mind.
posted by sneakin at 6:23 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by sneakin at 6:23 PM on September 10, 2007
When I was thirteen, I first snuck into my parents liquor cabinet and tried Campari. It was then that I identified as a Campari drinker. When i reached my early twenties, I went to work for the Campari marketing team. While their promotions reeked of rampant advertizing, I thought of it as a stepping stone to greater things.
Two years later, the AACE (American Association of Campari Drinkers) came along. I considered this an opportunity to create a publication that was less ad-focused, and could instead be about the issues facing Campari drinkers. We received many awards, including one from the Spirits Magazine Guild, which was awarded to Ted Kennedy one year later. Suddenly, I was a Campari Spokesman.
I can tell you now, however, that there is nothing virtuous about Campari. Drinking a bottle of Campari every night distracts one from the true God-given self. Jesus Christ repeatedly advises us not to trust anybody other than Him. I took his word, and after a great deal of prayer, understood that His word instructs us to drink wine. I am now happier and closer to God and his son for all the wine that I drink, and only regret the debaucherous, sinful years spent drinking all that Campari while all of the people in the industry pretended that it was somehow "okay."
I was weak when I was young, and so would spend my evenings suckling on my Campari bottle until the room spun and I passed out in a nightly ritual of ungodly sin, afraid of the truth that is wine. I believe most Campari drinkers are afraid of wine, for it is there that they see how God wishes them to be They make an enemy out of wine. Out of this fear.
16 hungover, pretentious years of my life have been wasted, and Campari has wasted them. It will continue to waste more people's lives as long as the law allows us to get staggeringly drunk on something that isn't wine. Meanwhile, the wine drinkers are shut-up, in the minority, and told to be more tolerant by an ever more Campari-loving public.
I was opressed then, and I am equally importantly oppressed now.
sniff
posted by Navelgazer at 6:27 PM on September 10, 2007 [19 favorites]
Two years later, the AACE (American Association of Campari Drinkers) came along. I considered this an opportunity to create a publication that was less ad-focused, and could instead be about the issues facing Campari drinkers. We received many awards, including one from the Spirits Magazine Guild, which was awarded to Ted Kennedy one year later. Suddenly, I was a Campari Spokesman.
I can tell you now, however, that there is nothing virtuous about Campari. Drinking a bottle of Campari every night distracts one from the true God-given self. Jesus Christ repeatedly advises us not to trust anybody other than Him. I took his word, and after a great deal of prayer, understood that His word instructs us to drink wine. I am now happier and closer to God and his son for all the wine that I drink, and only regret the debaucherous, sinful years spent drinking all that Campari while all of the people in the industry pretended that it was somehow "okay."
I was weak when I was young, and so would spend my evenings suckling on my Campari bottle until the room spun and I passed out in a nightly ritual of ungodly sin, afraid of the truth that is wine. I believe most Campari drinkers are afraid of wine, for it is there that they see how God wishes them to be They make an enemy out of wine. Out of this fear.
16 hungover, pretentious years of my life have been wasted, and Campari has wasted them. It will continue to waste more people's lives as long as the law allows us to get staggeringly drunk on something that isn't wine. Meanwhile, the wine drinkers are shut-up, in the minority, and told to be more tolerant by an ever more Campari-loving public.
I was opressed then, and I am equally importantly oppressed now.
sniff
posted by Navelgazer at 6:27 PM on September 10, 2007 [19 favorites]
I don't suppose Giatze recently, just coincidentally mind you, converted to any monotheistic relgions...did he?
posted by DU at 6:27 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by DU at 6:27 PM on September 10, 2007
Navelgazer, I really like your comment, but I don't totally get the point you're making. /honestly asking for clarity
posted by sneakin at 6:29 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by sneakin at 6:29 PM on September 10, 2007
Didn't you look at the username?
posted by nasreddin at 6:29 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by nasreddin at 6:29 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
On one hand you have a tragic story of a person overpowered both by their lust and by their internal guilt over a lust which many people are happily at peace with.
On the other hand, you have someone who had never seen or heard of goatse and it's 2007.
sneakin: All I can say is: watch out for tubgirl.
posted by delmoi at 6:31 PM on September 10, 2007 [7 favorites]
On the other hand, you have someone who had never seen or heard of goatse and it's 2007.
sneakin: All I can say is: watch out for tubgirl.
posted by delmoi at 6:31 PM on September 10, 2007 [7 favorites]
Christ, what a homo.
posted by dhammond at 6:34 PM on September 10, 2007 [3 favorites]
posted by dhammond at 6:34 PM on September 10, 2007 [3 favorites]
sneakin - the point that I'm making is that he obviously had (and has) major issues with how to handle sex and sexuality in human relationships, and also with needing to speak out as an "oppressed outsider" while seeking validation for what he was doing. If he couldn't find "normal' love in the bounds of same-sex relationships, and is now so adamant that they can't exist, then clearly the problem is with him, and he's not likely to fare any better in a heterosexual relationship.
In otherwords, the raging alcoholic Campari fan who switches to wine for his fix and then proclaims that Campari was evil is maybe not the best source of information - he's just shifting his problems to a new group that'll welcome him.
posted by Navelgazer at 6:34 PM on September 10, 2007 [4 favorites]
In otherwords, the raging alcoholic Campari fan who switches to wine for his fix and then proclaims that Campari was evil is maybe not the best source of information - he's just shifting his problems to a new group that'll welcome him.
posted by Navelgazer at 6:34 PM on September 10, 2007 [4 favorites]
Putting people who have gay sex in prison together will surely teach them a leson.
posted by aubilenon at 6:35 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
posted by aubilenon at 6:35 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
Very well put, Navelgazer. And I agree. Pardon my density.
posted by sneakin at 6:39 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by sneakin at 6:39 PM on September 10, 2007
This thread is half relevant, half derail, but I feel like a shit flagging because several of the derail comments are mine own.
posted by sneakin at 6:44 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by sneakin at 6:44 PM on September 10, 2007
Damn! You are a temptress and a bastard bruce!
posted by JeNeSaisQuoi at 6:49 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by JeNeSaisQuoi at 6:49 PM on September 10, 2007
Of course we should sentence people to prison for sodomy.
We should also sentence people to Burger King for obesity.
posted by jason's_planet at 6:52 PM on September 10, 2007 [10 favorites]
We should also sentence people to Burger King for obesity.
posted by jason's_planet at 6:52 PM on September 10, 2007 [10 favorites]
if i came out as a temptress, i'd have to renounce 52 years of being a tempter, and it isn't as easy for me as it was for the guy in the op's article.
posted by bruce at 6:54 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by bruce at 6:54 PM on September 10, 2007
however, I'll need to post an AskMe about how to get terrifying images out of my mind
I has some bad news.
posted by cj_ at 6:54 PM on September 10, 2007 [3 favorites]
I has some bad news.
posted by cj_ at 6:54 PM on September 10, 2007 [3 favorites]
uncanny hengeman, your comment forced me to google "Goatse" and find it through Wikipedia. I will never be the same again. I would type more but my tremors and nausea are preventing it.
Yup, that's how goatse works.
posted by humannaire at 7:02 PM on September 10, 2007
Yup, that's how goatse works.
posted by humannaire at 7:02 PM on September 10, 2007
Oh come on, it's a perfectly healthy colon! Don't fear the human body!
posted by Hildegarde at 7:04 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by Hildegarde at 7:04 PM on September 10, 2007
Come on, he's not really a 'former homosexual', he just changed his voter registration to Republican.
posted by wendell at 7:06 PM on September 10, 2007 [3 favorites]
posted by wendell at 7:06 PM on September 10, 2007 [3 favorites]
In otherwords, the raging alcoholic Campari fan who switches to wine for his fix and then proclaims that Campari was evil is maybe not the best source of information.
Not exactly apples and apples, but that post reminded me of this:
There is nothing worse than a harlot turned respectable. A reformed anything is bad enough, but a reformed harlot is the direct wrath of the Devil.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 7:17 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
Not exactly apples and apples, but that post reminded me of this:
There is nothing worse than a harlot turned respectable. A reformed anything is bad enough, but a reformed harlot is the direct wrath of the Devil.
posted by uncanny hengeman at 7:17 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
All the derails are really a shame since this is an interesting post. Fucking stop it, please.
posted by dhammond at 7:18 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by dhammond at 7:18 PM on September 10, 2007
Come on, he's not really a 'former homosexual', he just changed his voter registration to Republican.
Well played sir, well played.
posted by Mr_Zero at 7:19 PM on September 10, 2007
Well played sir, well played.
posted by Mr_Zero at 7:19 PM on September 10, 2007
WorldNetDaily has been very entertaing lately. Their anti-Burning Man diatribe was hilarious.
posted by homunculus at 7:25 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by homunculus at 7:25 PM on September 10, 2007
Wow, it's like mefi is as drunk as I am..... and I'm playing
Edward 40 hands. Damniyt, I didn't mean to hit enter that many times
posted by tehloki at 7:25 PM on September 10, 2007
Edward 40 hands. Damniyt, I didn't mean to hit enter that many times
posted by tehloki at 7:25 PM on September 10, 2007
Entertaining, even.
posted by homunculus at 7:26 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by homunculus at 7:26 PM on September 10, 2007
(it's really hard to type with malt liquour for hands)
posted by tehloki at 7:26 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by tehloki at 7:26 PM on September 10, 2007
God can cure you of homosexuality? Whatever. Fuck this guy.
posted by Mr_Zero at 7:28 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by Mr_Zero at 7:28 PM on September 10, 2007
We're trying, Mr. Zero! But it won't work! It's like there's some divine force keeping us from fucking him!
posted by Navelgazer at 7:32 PM on September 10, 2007 [5 favorites]
posted by Navelgazer at 7:32 PM on September 10, 2007 [5 favorites]
"I'd developed a growing relationship with God, thanks to a debilitating bout with intestinal cramps caused by the upset stomach-inducing behaviors I'd been engaged in."
I just find this to be a bit of a cheap shot on his part, everyone knows this is a total fundie/conservatism urban legend. I mean I know I'm nitpicking considering how the whole damn thing is bs, but uh come on.
posted by whoaali at 7:34 PM on September 10, 2007
I just find this to be a bit of a cheap shot on his part, everyone knows this is a total fundie/conservatism urban legend. I mean I know I'm nitpicking considering how the whole damn thing is bs, but uh come on.
posted by whoaali at 7:34 PM on September 10, 2007
Are there any stories of converted gays who reverted back to being gay? Came out the other side, like?
posted by Riverine at 7:35 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by Riverine at 7:35 PM on September 10, 2007
I used to be sexual, but then I got old and tired. What do I win?
posted by davy at 7:41 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
posted by davy at 7:41 PM on September 10, 2007 [2 favorites]
It's like there's some divine force keeping us from fucking him!
I hear if you tap your feet three times magical things happen.
posted by ryoshu at 7:45 PM on September 10, 2007
I hear if you tap your feet three times magical things happen.
posted by ryoshu at 7:45 PM on September 10, 2007
okay, davy, see that's just adorable. It has no place here.
posted by Navelgazer at 7:45 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by Navelgazer at 7:45 PM on September 10, 2007
Are there any stories of converted gays who reverted back to being gay? Came out the other side, like?
posted by Riverine at 10:35 PM on September 10
John Paulk
posted by whoaali at 7:48 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by Riverine at 10:35 PM on September 10
John Paulk
posted by whoaali at 7:48 PM on September 10, 2007
God-given Christ-self, what an asshole.
Also:
I turned to God; I'd developed a growing relationship with God, thanks to a debilitating bout with intestinal cramps
Is this why most people turn to God? Or just the crazy ones?
posted by trip and a half at 7:48 PM on September 10, 2007
Also:
I turned to God; I'd developed a growing relationship with God, thanks to a debilitating bout with intestinal cramps
Is this why most people turn to God? Or just the crazy ones?
posted by trip and a half at 7:48 PM on September 10, 2007
a debilitating bout with intestinal cramps
Is this why most people turn to God? Or just the crazy ones?
just the ones with raging throbbers ravaging thier lower gastro-intestinal tracts.
posted by quonsar at 7:54 PM on September 10, 2007
Is this why most people turn to God? Or just the crazy ones?
just the ones with raging throbbers ravaging thier lower gastro-intestinal tracts.
posted by quonsar at 7:54 PM on September 10, 2007
I really like this derail, because it's giving the subject of the post the lack of continued attention that he so richly deserves.
posted by darksasami at 7:59 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by darksasami at 7:59 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
Welcome back, friend. Jesus loves pussy, too.
posted by four panels at 8:06 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by four panels at 8:06 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
sneakin, there is an hilarious photo set on Flickr of people freaking out after seeing their first Goatse. It was an FFP here not too long ago. It is quite safe for work. No Goatses, just people freaking out about Goatse.
This picture is easily the funniest/best.
I liked the stunned shock of this picture.
posted by gyc at 8:22 PM on September 10, 2007
This picture is easily the funniest/best.
I liked the stunned shock of this picture.
posted by gyc at 8:22 PM on September 10, 2007
If a straight dude used the power of Christ to stop himself from acting on his urges to have sex with women, would he still be a straight dude? What the hell would he be? None of the above?
posted by facetious at 8:32 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by facetious at 8:32 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
If a straight dude used the power of Christ to stop himself from acting on his urges to have sex with women, would he still be a straight dude? What the hell would he be? None of the above?
A catholic priest minus the altar boys?
posted by whoaali at 8:41 PM on September 10, 2007
A catholic priest minus the altar boys?
posted by whoaali at 8:41 PM on September 10, 2007
I find gay sex disgusting and in the last year I've become a lot less tolerant of gays. A few years ago I considered myself gay since I'm not attracted to women, even though I never had sex with a man and find the thought of doing that very distasteful.
posted by mike3k at 8:41 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by mike3k at 8:41 PM on September 10, 2007
He should run for Senator, from Idaho.
posted by orthogonality at 8:44 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by orthogonality at 8:44 PM on September 10, 2007
Two things:
First off, I'm sorry, but as a straight guy, this whole thing sounds weird. I mean, because once you know gay guys in relationships, and straight guys in relationships, you realize that they act pretty much the same. Some are total horndogs, some are in it for the need to be mothered, whatever.
"We believe, under the influence of homosexuality, that lust is not just acceptable, but a virtue. But there is no homosexual "desire" that is apart from lust."
But this gets to the whole "No True Scotsman" bullshit of this guy—he has fucked up relationships. It's not just a gay thing, chief. Straight people have fucked up relationships too. Ever watch Sally? Further on, where he went all asexual super-denial, with the purity of total self-abnegation, is the crux of it: instead of looking for places that he could indulge urges in a way that was fun and didn't disrupt the rest of his life, he turned to the supersystem of Jesus.
This is the nihilism of the fundamentalists, the unfair brush that all Christians get tarred with.
posted by klangklangston at 8:53 PM on September 10, 2007 [4 favorites]
First off, I'm sorry, but as a straight guy, this whole thing sounds weird. I mean, because once you know gay guys in relationships, and straight guys in relationships, you realize that they act pretty much the same. Some are total horndogs, some are in it for the need to be mothered, whatever.
"We believe, under the influence of homosexuality, that lust is not just acceptable, but a virtue. But there is no homosexual "desire" that is apart from lust."
But this gets to the whole "No True Scotsman" bullshit of this guy—he has fucked up relationships. It's not just a gay thing, chief. Straight people have fucked up relationships too. Ever watch Sally? Further on, where he went all asexual super-denial, with the purity of total self-abnegation, is the crux of it: instead of looking for places that he could indulge urges in a way that was fun and didn't disrupt the rest of his life, he turned to the supersystem of Jesus.
This is the nihilism of the fundamentalists, the unfair brush that all Christians get tarred with.
posted by klangklangston at 8:53 PM on September 10, 2007 [4 favorites]
Oh, yeah, second— Wow, internet! Some people haven't seen goatse yet!
Sweet nostalgia.
posted by klangklangston at 8:55 PM on September 10, 2007
Sweet nostalgia.
posted by klangklangston at 8:55 PM on September 10, 2007
This is the first time I'm glad Matt took away the inline pictures.
And hey, I just noticed Tubgirl is wearing socks!
posted by now i'm piste at 9:33 PM on September 10, 2007
And hey, I just noticed Tubgirl is wearing socks!
posted by now i'm piste at 9:33 PM on September 10, 2007
A few years ago I considered myself gay since I'm not attracted to women, even though I never had sex with a man and find the thought of doing that very distasteful.
Morrissey? Is that you?
posted by infinitywaltz at 10:42 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
Morrissey? Is that you?
posted by infinitywaltz at 10:42 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
Discovery: I'm fond of chocolate cake. This fondness must be a virtue. In fact, I'm going to tell everyone about how inherently virtuous it is.
Wow, confectioners are showering me with accolades!
Dilemma: On long reflection, nothing about my taste for chocolate cake seems inherently virtuous. Ergo, it must be a vice! I'm going to blog about recanting my old ways.
Wow, zealous diet groups are showering me with accolades!
Conclusion: Wait a sec. Taste isn't a virtue, or a vice - it's a mere biological fact. Whether it's good or bad has everything to do with the part I let it play in human interaction. Wow, I finally get it. I'm definitely going to blog about this...
Hey, why isn't my blog generating buzz?
posted by kid ichorous at 10:43 PM on September 10, 2007 [4 favorites]
Wow, confectioners are showering me with accolades!
Dilemma: On long reflection, nothing about my taste for chocolate cake seems inherently virtuous. Ergo, it must be a vice! I'm going to blog about recanting my old ways.
Wow, zealous diet groups are showering me with accolades!
Conclusion: Wait a sec. Taste isn't a virtue, or a vice - it's a mere biological fact. Whether it's good or bad has everything to do with the part I let it play in human interaction. Wow, I finally get it. I'm definitely going to blog about this...
Hey, why isn't my blog generating buzz?
posted by kid ichorous at 10:43 PM on September 10, 2007 [4 favorites]
@mike3k: Huh? Are you being serious or was that a parody that just went slightly over my head?
At any rate, although I hesitate to say anything about the WorldNetDaily article, simply because I don't want to dignify it with a response, no matter how small ... my overall reaction is this:
If you're a dude, and you have to get Jesus Christ on the line with some divine intercession to stop you from taking it from some other dude in the ol' poop chute and liking it, you're pretty darn gay. You can say you're not gay all you want, but you're not fooling anyone. Except maybe yourself.
posted by Kadin2048 at 10:54 PM on September 10, 2007
At any rate, although I hesitate to say anything about the WorldNetDaily article, simply because I don't want to dignify it with a response, no matter how small ... my overall reaction is this:
If you're a dude, and you have to get Jesus Christ on the line with some divine intercession to stop you from taking it from some other dude in the ol' poop chute and liking it, you're pretty darn gay. You can say you're not gay all you want, but you're not fooling anyone. Except maybe yourself.
posted by Kadin2048 at 10:54 PM on September 10, 2007
Tom Robinson (gay rights campaigning 70s new wave star known for the song "Glad To Be Gay") eventually married a woman and kind of became straight. Well bisexual anyway.
posted by w0mbat at 10:58 PM on September 10, 2007
posted by w0mbat at 10:58 PM on September 10, 2007
So he started praying? For pussy, I guess?
There's nothing wrong with that.
posted by homunculus at 11:36 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
There's nothing wrong with that.
posted by homunculus at 11:36 PM on September 10, 2007 [1 favorite]
A few years ago I considered myself gay since I'm not attracted to women, even though I never had sex with a man and find the thought of doing that very distasteful.
Morrissey? Is that you?
I was a good kid
I wouldn't do you no harm
I was a nice kid
with a nice paper-round
Forgive me any pain
I may have brung to you
With God's help I know
I'll always be near to you
but Jesus hurt me
When He deserted me / but
I have forgiven you Jesus
for all the desire
He placed in me
when there's nothing I can do with this desire
I was good kid
through hail and snow / I'd go
just to moon you
I carried my heart in my hand
- do you understand?
- do you understand?
but Jesus hurt me
when He deserted me / but
I have forgiven Jesus
for all of the love / he placed in me
when there's no one I can turn to with this love
Monday - humiliation / Tuesday - suffocation
Wednesday - condescension / Thursday - is pathetic
by Friday - Life has killed me
by Friday - Life has killed me
why did you give me /so much desire?
when there is nowhere I can go
to offload this desire?
and why did you give me so much love
in a loveless world?
when there is no one I can turn to
to unlock all this love
and why did you stick me in
self-deprecating bones and skin
Jesus - do you hate me?
why did you stick me in
self-deprecating bones and skin
... do you hate me?
posted by Avenger at 12:01 AM on September 11, 2007
Morrissey? Is that you?
I was a good kid
I wouldn't do you no harm
I was a nice kid
with a nice paper-round
Forgive me any pain
I may have brung to you
With God's help I know
I'll always be near to you
but Jesus hurt me
When He deserted me / but
I have forgiven you Jesus
for all the desire
He placed in me
when there's nothing I can do with this desire
I was good kid
through hail and snow / I'd go
just to moon you
I carried my heart in my hand
- do you understand?
- do you understand?
but Jesus hurt me
when He deserted me / but
I have forgiven Jesus
for all of the love / he placed in me
when there's no one I can turn to with this love
Monday - humiliation / Tuesday - suffocation
Wednesday - condescension / Thursday - is pathetic
by Friday - Life has killed me
by Friday - Life has killed me
why did you give me /so much desire?
when there is nowhere I can go
to offload this desire?
and why did you give me so much love
in a loveless world?
when there is no one I can turn to
to unlock all this love
and why did you stick me in
self-deprecating bones and skin
Jesus - do you hate me?
why did you stick me in
self-deprecating bones and skin
... do you hate me?
posted by Avenger at 12:01 AM on September 11, 2007
uncanny hengeman & sneakin, I bow before your amazing derail, may you bask in the light of goatse forever. fyi Dan Savage rocks (less off topic).
posted by jeffburdges at 12:38 AM on September 11, 2007
posted by jeffburdges at 12:38 AM on September 11, 2007
Riverine: Are there any stories of converted gays who reverted back to being gay? Came out the other side, like?
Well, there's Overcome.
posted by Pronoiac at 1:49 AM on September 11, 2007
Well, there's Overcome.
posted by Pronoiac at 1:49 AM on September 11, 2007
Glatze's slogan: "Will Work for Kinsey Scale."
posted by rob511 at 1:58 AM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]
posted by rob511 at 1:58 AM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]
mike3k: wtf? Performance art or are you making a point that is going over my head?
posted by sneakin at 3:29 AM on September 11, 2007
posted by sneakin at 3:29 AM on September 11, 2007
"quoting him as suggesting America '"examine whether homosexuality should be legal""
Ok ok I see he was talked into finding Jebuz or something, I can't find other explanation for this newfound fervor for legislating others sexuality, sounds like polar switching between "no freedom" and "freedom"
"Every time I was tempted to lust, I noticed it, caught it, dealt with it'"
Guilt trips and euphemism for masturbation...mmhh, even more signs of being talked into shame and guilt.
Ahhh keeping people busy with false troubles such as reaffirming their sexuality : what a fantastic trick ! Hey MAN, you want to be MAN and not FAGOT ? Go to war, you FAGOT ! Aren't you manly enough !? Because you are FAGOT ! Chase bullets, that's what manmans do ! Hey girl you don't have 10 kids ? Cause you DYKE !
posted by elpapacito at 3:43 AM on September 11, 2007
Ok ok I see he was talked into finding Jebuz or something, I can't find other explanation for this newfound fervor for legislating others sexuality, sounds like polar switching between "no freedom" and "freedom"
"Every time I was tempted to lust, I noticed it, caught it, dealt with it'"
Guilt trips and euphemism for masturbation...mmhh, even more signs of being talked into shame and guilt.
Ahhh keeping people busy with false troubles such as reaffirming their sexuality : what a fantastic trick ! Hey MAN, you want to be MAN and not FAGOT ? Go to war, you FAGOT ! Aren't you manly enough !? Because you are FAGOT ! Chase bullets, that's what manmans do ! Hey girl you don't have 10 kids ? Cause you DYKE !
posted by elpapacito at 3:43 AM on September 11, 2007
Clearly Campari is a dangerous drug and should be outlawed. Call your Congressmen, people! We have to stop the moral scourge that is Campari!
posted by moonbiter at 4:26 AM on September 11, 2007
posted by moonbiter at 4:26 AM on September 11, 2007
I had a friend who's dad used to come in from work every evening and announce, "I smoked for years and quit, do they call me a smoker? But, you suck one cock and the rest of your life they call you cocksucker!"
His father was an interesting man.
posted by Pollomacho at 5:01 AM on September 11, 2007
His father was an interesting man.
posted by Pollomacho at 5:01 AM on September 11, 2007
I'll need to post an AskMe about how to get terrifying images out of my mind.
I recommend going to your bathroom and flossing.
posted by a robot made out of meat at 5:32 AM on September 11, 2007
I recommend going to your bathroom and flossing.
posted by a robot made out of meat at 5:32 AM on September 11, 2007
I find gay sex disgusting and in the last year I've become a lot less tolerant of gays. A few years ago I considered myself gay since I'm not attracted to women, even though I never had sex with a man and find the thought of doing that very distasteful.
posted by mike3k at 8:41 PM on September 10
you are a complete headcase; seek help
posted by Optimus Chyme at 5:36 AM on September 11, 2007
posted by mike3k at 8:41 PM on September 10
you are a complete headcase; seek help
posted by Optimus Chyme at 5:36 AM on September 11, 2007
"Today so many kids who are gay, they don't like Cher. They aren't part of the whole subculture," says Michael Glatze, 30, editor in chief of YGA Magazine. "They feel like they belong in their faith, in their families."
Just like all problems with gays. It's all ultimately traceable back to Cher.
posted by blucevalo at 8:48 AM on September 11, 2007
Just like all problems with gays. It's all ultimately traceable back to Cher.
posted by blucevalo at 8:48 AM on September 11, 2007
Most startlingly, Glatze said that America needs to "examine whether homosexuality should be legal" or if gay sex should instead be punished by "imprisonment."
Actually, while we're at it, let's imprison former gays, too, because they could always be under suspicion of being liable to flip back to gaydom without a moment's warning.
"I've actually been trying to cut down on talking to people," Glatze said. "I had prayed about going on 'Signorile' and CNN and decided not to. Many people I've spoken to have been not so nice to me."
Golly gee willikers. I wonder why?
posted by blucevalo at 8:57 AM on September 11, 2007
Actually, while we're at it, let's imprison former gays, too, because they could always be under suspicion of being liable to flip back to gaydom without a moment's warning.
"I've actually been trying to cut down on talking to people," Glatze said. "I had prayed about going on 'Signorile' and CNN and decided not to. Many people I've spoken to have been not so nice to me."
Golly gee willikers. I wonder why?
posted by blucevalo at 8:57 AM on September 11, 2007
Sorry, slight derail, Cher is still smokin' hot. In the high-class prostitute type of way. Or, actually, not so high-class.
But still hot!
posted by eurasian at 9:00 AM on September 11, 2007
But still hot!
posted by eurasian at 9:00 AM on September 11, 2007
i blame dusty springfield.
posted by sgt.serenity at 10:37 AM on September 11, 2007
posted by sgt.serenity at 10:37 AM on September 11, 2007
I find gay sex disgusting and in the last year I've become a lot less tolerant of gays. A few years ago I considered myself gay since I'm not attracted to women, even though I never had sex with a man and find the thought of doing that very distasteful.
Assuming you're not trolling: Confusion about sexual identity is completely normal, even for adults, and a good (non-preachy) therapist can help.
Assuming you are trolling: I'd suggest trannies. They represent the best of both worlds.
posted by kid ichorous at 12:32 PM on September 11, 2007
Assuming you're not trolling: Confusion about sexual identity is completely normal, even for adults, and a good (non-preachy) therapist can help.
Assuming you are trolling: I'd suggest trannies. They represent the best of both worlds.
posted by kid ichorous at 12:32 PM on September 11, 2007
"I find gay sex disgusting and in the last year I've become a lot less tolerant of gays. A few years ago I considered myself gay since I'm not attracted to women, even though I never had sex with a man and find the thought of doing that very distasteful.
posted by mike3k at 8:41 PM on September 10"
Taking this seriously, maybe you're just not a sexual being at all. There's nothing wrong with that, and I wouldn't even suggest seeing a therapist as I don't regard not wanting sex as a problem to be fixed. But assuming I've read you correctly, you're wrong about one thing: straight sex is every bit as disgusting as the gay kind, as I know from years of lots of experience.
Not quite so seriously, how do you feel about goats or sheep? Is it that you're not attracted to anything at all, or just not men and women?
posted by davy at 8:41 PM on September 11, 2007
posted by mike3k at 8:41 PM on September 10"
Taking this seriously, maybe you're just not a sexual being at all. There's nothing wrong with that, and I wouldn't even suggest seeing a therapist as I don't regard not wanting sex as a problem to be fixed. But assuming I've read you correctly, you're wrong about one thing: straight sex is every bit as disgusting as the gay kind, as I know from years of lots of experience.
Not quite so seriously, how do you feel about goats or sheep? Is it that you're not attracted to anything at all, or just not men and women?
posted by davy at 8:41 PM on September 11, 2007
Wow, is davy cool or what? He's like the MetaDad we all wanted growing up.
As for mike3k, I thought he was just being glib.
posted by humannaire at 8:03 PM on September 12, 2007
As for mike3k, I thought he was just being glib.
posted by humannaire at 8:03 PM on September 12, 2007
« Older La Casa De La Cascada | Kevin Everett and Catastrophic football cervical... Newer »
This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
posted by uncanny hengeman at 5:53 PM on September 10, 2007 [3 favorites]