I come to bury Pratt, not to praise him
September 12, 2007 4:30 AM   Subscribe

An obituary for Lord Michael Pratt a classic British toff. Despite his expertise on Central European country houses it seems he will be best remembered as: "one of the last Wodehouseian figures to inhabit London's clubland and...an unabashed snob and social interloper on a grand scale." Many more hilarious and unkind details about his schooling: "He was sent to Eton, having already acquired the rotund shape that would stay with him for the rest of his life.", and his boozing: "He was also a leading light in another Oxford club called the Snuff Committee, the sole purpose of which was to take snuff and drink port. Membership was by invitation only; the only stipulation was that one had to be the son of a landowner." Wags are already describing it as "the least hagiographic obit ever published".
posted by roofus (51 comments total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
 
I was just reading that via The Guardian too.
His mother, the Marchioness, suspected him of being idle; Pratt maintained that he was unable to study owing to a broken leg.

In fact, both these things were true.
Great stuff.
posted by ninebelow at 4:46 AM on September 12, 2007


.
posted by zemblamatic at 4:50 AM on September 12, 2007


After graduating Pratt found a position at Lazard Brothers, the merchant bank. Three months into his new job, however, he judged that it would be more agreeable to attend Royal Ascot than to turn up at the office, and his services were dispensed with. He never again sought full-time employment.

Lord Pratt - treading that fine line between "obnoxious parasite" and "role model".

Also, previously in Metafilter posts about hilarious Telegraph obituaries of dilettante aristocrats.
posted by flashboy at 4:53 AM on September 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Hilarious.

But I have to ask a question.

Why do all UK print publications (I'm basing this on the BBC and Telegraph articles I've read online) put every sentence in its own paragraph.

It is annoying.

And makes no sense.
posted by DU at 5:06 AM on September 12, 2007


From the letters page of yesterday's Telegraph:
Sir - Your obituary (September 8) of Lord Michael Pratt was mean-spirited and, in a number of respects, false. Lord Michael never "pined" for anything so ephemeral as "the days of Empire", and the description of him as an "unabashed snob and social interloper" is a travesty of the truth. Lord Michael certainly treasured his annual tours of Britain, Europe and America, when he visited his vast array of friends, all of whom greeted him with open arms. The allegation that he overstayed his welcome by weeks or months is quite untrue.

The caricature of Michael as a gin-soaked club bore is so far from being true that it would be laughable were the lie anything less than wicked. His quick wit, his charm, his depth of knowledge, his powers of conversation and, above all, his great capacity for friendship were the qualities which all those who knew and loved him will cherish. He was a loyal friend and a genial and generous host at Bayham, in London and in Italy.

— John Bromley-Davenport, London EC4

Sir - Your obituary of Lord Michael Pratt raised my spirits. He seems to have contributed very little of use to the world in his life, and it is only fitting that his obituary should, at least, raise a chuckle.

— Richard Greenfield, Mildenhall, Suffolk
posted by Aloysius Bear at 5:07 AM on September 12, 2007


(Quick derail: the obit mentions a vehicle going 70 mph. Are road speeds in the UK not metric?)
posted by Ian A.T. at 5:13 AM on September 12, 2007


Must be 70 meters per hour. You know how British cars are.
posted by DU at 5:16 AM on September 12, 2007




We have won an historic victory only yesterday to maintain a few imperial measures, including pints and mph. link.
posted by roofus at 5:20 AM on September 12, 2007


No.
posted by flashboy at 5:21 AM on September 12, 2007


I'm baffled as to how the word "no" just got posted there.
posted by flashboy at 5:22 AM on September 12, 2007


I have no clue whether or not this might be the case, but it almost felt like the sort of over-the-top, joke obit that a fellow with a good sense of humor and a "damme, let's have a laugh" attitude might have penned for himself and left for publication on his check-out.

I'd like my own obituary, for example, to say, "Mr. Mahaffie felt that the world was filled with all sorts of different people, wonderful in their variety and individuality and all of them always getting in his way."
posted by mmahaffie at 5:24 AM on September 12, 2007 [3 favorites]


Wow, the epitome of Upperclass Twit of the Year. I wish all obits were like this one. "She was kind to dogs yet rather smelly and unable to balance a checkbook."
posted by FelliniBlank at 5:24 AM on September 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Road speeds in the UK are in miles.

I love these obituaries in The Telegraph. They are deliciously entertaining.
posted by ClanvidHorse at 5:25 AM on September 12, 2007


So the Monty Python skit about the Upper Class Twit of the Year was really a documentary?
posted by jonp72 at 5:29 AM on September 12, 2007


Why do all UK print publications (I'm basing this on the BBC and Telegraph articles I've read online) put every sentence in its own paragraph.

They don't. Read again.
posted by i_cola at 5:35 AM on September 12, 2007


We have won an historic victory only yesterday to maintain a few imperial measures...

This is a use of the word "won" of which I was previous unaware.

They don't. Read again.

Not literally every sentence. But take these two sentences:

He was also a leading light in another Oxford club called the Snuff Committee, the sole purpose of which was to take snuff and drink port.

Membership was by invitation only; the only stipulation was that one had to be the son of a landowner.


How is that not supposed to be one paragraph? The first sentence is clearly a topic sentence and the second clearly fleshes it out.
posted by DU at 5:44 AM on September 12, 2007


The Telegraph often does when reformatting articles for its website. I have no idea why.
posted by Mocata at 5:44 AM on September 12, 2007


I love these dead-fop obits. Thanks for posting it!
posted by languagehat at 5:48 AM on September 12, 2007


This is a use of the word "won" of which I was previous unaware.

"In what was being celebrated as a triumph for the British David over the European Goliath, the European commission has capitulated to England's "metric martyrs" and reprieved the imperial measure."

Even the Guardian have slipped into tabloid style Euro bashing on this one, so I allowed myself a little poetic licence too.
posted by roofus at 5:50 AM on September 12, 2007


Pity. He would have been the ideal Tory candidate for Mayor of London.
posted by Flashman at 5:53 AM on September 12, 2007


Says Flashman, appropriately enough. Sounds like a relative of yours.
posted by imperium at 6:04 AM on September 12, 2007


"Once sentence per paragraph" is a stylistic hangover from the days of hot metal. It's a simple way to make an article fill up a space when you've had to lay the page out in advance of knowing exactly how long each item would be.

Its counterpoint is "cutting from the bottom up" - writing a story with sentences in receding order of importance, so that an overlong piece could be rapidly cut to fit with minimal loss of information.
posted by game warden to the events rhino at 6:06 AM on September 12, 2007


It's a wonderful notion, that Lord Pratt might have written that obit himself. I don't think it's very probable, unless he was a very good pal of the editor. It's easy to imagine, though, that some satirical media junkie (eg Armando Iannucci, Chris Morris) could already have filed his own copy.

An Englishman to the tip of his school tie, the actor John le Mesurier arranged for the Times's classified ads to carry his own death notice, in 1984, announcing he had "simply conked out". This was widely regarded as being the best possible form.
posted by MinPin at 6:07 AM on September 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


"Once sentence per paragraph" is a stylistic hangover from the days of hot metal.

Sadly, I find this perfectly plausible.
posted by DU at 6:15 AM on September 12, 2007


It didn't occur to me that he'd written it himself--which would be fabulous--but I did wonder if, since it was so comically over-the-top, it weren't an affectionate goodbye from one drinking buddy to another, in a manner that the deceased would have appreciated...
posted by Ian A.T. at 6:18 AM on September 12, 2007


The classic Monty Python Upper Class Twit of the Year.
posted by PenDevil at 6:26 AM on September 12, 2007


"..the actor John le Mesurier arranged for the Times's classified ads to carry his own death notice, in 1984, announcing he had "simply conked out"...."

And, if memory serves MinPin, also telling his friends that he missed them very much!

Haven't thought about the lovely le Mesurier in years - and wasn't there also some frightful scandal to do with Tony Hancock that popped up after leM conked out?
posted by Jody Tresidder at 6:37 AM on September 12, 2007


and even after his motor accident at Oxford he remained a demon car driver, terrifying passengers with his speed and overtaking technique, which he often employed on blind bends at speeds of more than 70mph.

This isn't the obit of any real person; it's actually the obituary of Mr. Toad of Toad Hall.
posted by jokeefe at 6:41 AM on September 12, 2007 [3 favorites]


...an affectionate goodbye from one drinking buddy to another...

That's a good thought, Jody Tresidder, I like that idea. Whether you write your own obit or a friend does it for you, it seems like a cool way to give death the finger and head off into the unknown with a grin.
posted by mmahaffie at 6:44 AM on September 12, 2007


This obit should be put into the context of Anglo culture. This from the 1899 book Among English Hedgerows:
It seemed to be the opinion of the general public that the gentry were, in the main, not of much value as a part of the national life. The best of them study politics and statecraft, or some branch of science, or they interest themselves helpfully in their tenants and home villages. But the large majority, after being sent as young men to Oxford or Cambridge, settle down to a life of indolence and the pursuit of pleasure. Their greatest accomplishment is very likely the ability to ride well after the hounds, and their finest boast is of the times they have come in first in the hunt.
So we can assume The Telegraph caters to the "general public" and its attitudes and values.
posted by stbalbach at 6:50 AM on September 12, 2007


I both despise the man and envy his obit.
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:18 AM on September 12, 2007


ObitFilter: MeFi user Ian A.T. passed away this morning from a terminal lack of recognition. The cause of death was mmahaffie misattributing one of his comments to Jody Tresidder. The survivors, Mr. A.T's three Contacts, request Favorites in lieu of flowers.




.
posted by Ian A.T. at 7:24 AM on September 12, 2007 [3 favorites]


Glorious.
posted by Divine_Wino at 7:32 AM on September 12, 2007


Well, shit. I kilt a man in MeFi! Ahm an outlawr, doomed ter wander the blue takin' comfort from no one no matter what their user-number might be.

Sorry Ian!
posted by mmahaffie at 7:34 AM on September 12, 2007


On second thought, maybe mock US Western film dialect is not appropriate in this thread?

Ah, the hell with it, I already screwed up. Maybe I'll take an early lunch.
posted by mmahaffie at 7:36 AM on September 12, 2007


So we can assume The Telegraph caters to the "general public" and its attitudes and values.

The Torygraph, as it is nicknamed, is the paper of choice for many in the Home Counties and not just the landed gentry. It is a solidly middle-class paper, though it is readily available in newsagents in poorer areas (and, therefore, somebody must be buying those copies) so it is not like it is an elitist publication like Harpers and Queens or whatever.

I must admit, although its politics are diametrically opposite to mine, I think that- Euroscepticism aside- it is a decent paper with some of the best sports coverage in the UK (excepting the tea-timely Fiver email from the Guardian).

It is an infinitely better paper than the not-even-good-for-shit-roll Daily Mail or The Times. If there is no Guardian available I will take The Telegraph long before I would even consider that joke-book that is The 'issue driven' Indie (Sample front cover: Bono as messiah trying to punt Amex Red cards).
posted by ClanvidHorse at 7:56 AM on September 12, 2007


Ian A.T: (Quick derail: the obit mentions a vehicle going 70 mph. Are road speeds in the UK not metric?)

No. Some things are, lots of things aren't.
posted by vbfg at 8:00 AM on September 12, 2007


Worse men than this fellow die every day. Pratt just happened to be ridiculed in his obituary. He was raised with money, connections, and no reason to work. He drank in clubs, raced in cars, and idled in enough great homes to write books about them. He was industriously idle. If he did all this and perhaps even wore yellow socks, it may just be that the moderating force of a Jeeves never shimmered into his life.
posted by pracowity at 9:14 AM on September 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


Very generously and charmingly put, pracowity.

(I used to know a lovely aristo at college. He used to sell off cows from his prize herd (the herd was a coming-of-age gift) one by one to reduce his terrible running overdraft.

It got even more expensive - because he ended up having to bribe the family herdsman to keep the diminishing herd well out of sight on his family's land.

He knew his father would be rather ticked off.)
posted by Jody Tresidder at 10:14 AM on September 12, 2007


He was industriously idle.

Indeed. Truly, he is my new god.

*Performs inact of devotion*
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:18 AM on September 12, 2007


Although, my dad's friends who knew him agree that the obituary is entirely accurate.
posted by patricio at 12:30 PM on September 12, 2007


Pratt prat?
posted by klangklangston at 12:46 PM on September 12, 2007


'One sentence per paragraph' is a stylistic hangover from the days of hot metal. It's a simple way to make an article fill up a space when you've had to lay the page out in advance of knowing exactly how long each item would be.

That's a very ingenious explanation, but I have the print version of this obituary in front of me now, and it's printed with multiple sentences per paragraph. Mocata's explanation is correct: the article has been reformatted for the website.

This is one of the great Telegraph obituaries, an instant classic (though it doesn't quite match up to my all-time favourite, the obituary of Sandy Fawkes, legendary Soho drunk). I think the funniest passage might possibly be this one (I love the ironic understatement in the word 'unwise'):

The Camden family fortune had been somewhat depleted after the Second World War, following some unwise financial decisions. The family had hung on to property near Snowdonia in Wales while selling large tracts of central London; while the property in London flourished, the Welsh land remained confined to sheep-grazing.
posted by verstegan at 1:24 PM on September 12, 2007 [1 favorite]


It sounds like this was a bit of a pratt.
posted by quin at 3:14 PM on September 12, 2007


my all-time favourite, the obituary of Sandy Fawkes, legendary Soho drunk

Oh dear god, thank you for that.

*wipes away tears of delight*

The US will always be a second-rate, half-assed nation until one of its major newspapers becomes capable of producing this sort of epic send-off. We might as well hang it up right now.
posted by FelliniBlank at 6:33 PM on September 12, 2007


Ok, the whole thing was awfully funny, save
On arriving at Balliol College, Oxford, Pratt took exception to the state of his rooms, decamping to the Randolph Hotel until his mother arrived with bucket and mop to render his apartments habitable.
That just irritated me. If I was his mother, boy... well, let's just say I would've told him where to put the mop.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 6:50 PM on September 12, 2007


Descendant of John Pratt, 1st Marquess Camden, Lord Lieutenant of Ireland.
Disliked in Ireland as an opponent of Roman Catholic emancipation and as the exponent of an unpopular policy, Camden's term of office was one of commotion and alarm, culminating in the rebellion of 1798.
from a google group comment - "This is a marquisate with now only one person in remainder and therefore heading to rapid extinction, pity too, as the title designation is most unusual."
Does anyone know why it became a 'Marquess' rather than remaining an 'Earl'? Is that why it's unusual?
posted by tellurian at 11:35 PM on September 12, 2007


That just irritated me. If I was his mother, boy... well, let's just say I would've told him where to put the mop.

If the answer is "The Randolph Hotel" I imagine the storage costs would have been prohibitively expensive.
posted by vbfg at 1:10 AM on September 13, 2007


That's a very ingenious explanation, but I have the print version of this obituary in front of me now, and it's printed with multiple sentences per paragraph. Mocata's explanation is correct: the article has been reformatted for the website.

Perhaps they were trying to fill up column-inches of the web page?
posted by mazola at 8:50 PM on September 13, 2007


Three possible explanations of the reformatting for the website, two of them depending on what the technological set-up at the Telegraph is (never worked there, so I don't know):

1) The articles are written in the broken-apart style, to make it easier for the subs to cut. They are only assembled into longer pars when laid out on the page; the copy that goes to the website (likely by an automatic process) retains the original line breaks.

2) The articles, when transferred to the website, come without any paragraph breaks (this is the case with the newspaper website I work at). Breaks have to be put in manually - and the quickest way to do this is to break at the end of most sentences, as this doesn't require the person doing it to read and understand the sense of the article (which saves a huge amount of time when you've got a large number of articles to process.)

3) The people at the Telegraph simply think that very short pars make web copy more readable - long pars appear far more daunting to the reader when they're online than when they're in print. I've heard this from plenty of people in the business, although I'm sceptical as to its accuracy.
posted by flashboy at 9:52 AM on September 16, 2007


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